 Okay, cool. Awesome. Awesome. We love us some mercury retrograde guys. This is just the way it is with old mercury and Doing its retrograde doing it. This has been a mercury retrograde doozy. Yes Well, and the good thing about I mean, I always say this every mercury retrograde like what before we get into the astrology Cuz that's what we're gonna talk about today with beautiful Emmy and beautiful stuffy and we're gonna we're gonna I just called you What tomorrow calls you stuffy? We're gonna piggyback to on to our last conversation But yeah, the thing about mercury retrograde like the things you don't want to do a mercury retrograde You don't want to sign any contracts. You don't want to get married during your retrograde You don't want to you know start a new job. You don't want to get a new cell phone You don't want to get a new car or a new laptop. You just have to be very Weary of communication stuff, you know, that's what you have to be weary of however The good thing about mercury retrograde is that it's a good time for projects. You've been working on To be completed. Yes So with that being said, I'm gonna pass the ball over to you Emmy since you're the one that is looking at our upcoming month Okay, sure stars So I didn't do an in-depth Look into things like I normally do but I'm just gonna touch on a few of the themes that are going on and Like Bryce said, we're piggybacking on our last conversation that we had a couple of days ago And right now is an excellent time to do shadow work We have Venus and Virgo and Mercury is right next door in Libra So these two aren't conjunct right now, but they will be towards the end of this retrograde and Venus and Virgo is very Cooperative very peaceful very Humanitarian so it's a really good time for self-care and because Virgo is very organized and you know making lists and Doing things in a detailed fashion It would be great to do shadow work, especially if you are following a certain formula like What I'm doing with my catalyst journal and I got that from Aaron Abki's content I'm also working through the 12 stops in my recovery program. So those are just examples of mine There are so many ways to do shadow work It's just kind of a trial and error thing with what works for you because everyone is different Everyone's astrological picture is different how people learn and process information is different for me This particular retrograde isn't as bad as others But it's because I have my natal mercury in an air sign Libra is an air sign So it's not quite as disruptive For me as it could be for other people like Stephanie You were saying that this is a really big doozy of a retrograde and you know if we were able to work with nature and take the time off of work and To be able to slow down because what retrogrades are is like a slow down It's a slow down and it can create and cause chaos because we can't slow down our lives to work with it And so that's why it seems so bad and chaotic is because we're not able to work with nature if we were able to then we could take the time and sit with ourselves and Slow down and make sure that our emails and texts are going to the right people and we're seeing the right things and we can Mull things over before we have a serious talk with some someone and like what what Brice said, you know If unless you have done thorough work and revisited Signing contracts or getting married or those kinds of things unless you have made absolute Certain that it is going to be a smooth transaction wait wait till Mercury's done It's just it will just work out better that way Okay, so Venus is in Virgo Mercury is in Libra Mercury is going to travel back to Virgo and make a conjunction to Libra. So The reason why I believe that this is a good time for self-care is because Because Virgo is so organized and detailed you're able to have those conversations with yourself to just sit in meditation and Write things down and feel the feelings like yesterday. Oh my gosh. I would completely devolved emotionally I did part of a bar workout that Bryce was talking about and Stephanie in our last video I did part of a bar workout and it broke something loose and I could not figure out What exactly it was stumbling from and I tried for a good portion of my day to try to figure out what it was Stumbing from so I could you know give myself reiki and you know Maybe send energy to that and heal that but I could not figure out what it was from I have no idea so I just after I couldn't figure out. I was like, okay. I'm just gonna allow myself to feel I'm not gonna try to escape. I'm not gonna try to cover it up. I'm not gonna, you know cover it with toxic positivity I'm just gonna feel this and it was shitty. It freaking sucks I was a hot mess like I had to tell my husband like you just need to leave me alone I'm like just leave me alone. I am not good company right now And I feel much better today, you know, I feel much better today a good night's for us. That's Sometimes the best healing that we can have So that's that it's excellent time for self-care. Just focus on yourself and don't feel guilty about taking that time It's so so so important the best thing you can do for this world and the collective is not Following gossipy truthers is not watching the news and figuring out what's going on at what certain time in what certain country That's not gonna help anybody. What's gonna help anybody is you healing yourself if we all took the time to heal ourselves The collective would move up a lot faster Can we pause on that for a second before we get to the rest of the astrological? Look at the month because we were chatting before we hit record and Stephanie and I spoke about this last night and And I do recommend I Marnie Alton is one of my favorites I've done multiple bar different bar classes, but she is by far the best in my opinion because she understands energetic body and you and for someone like me that's spent almost 16 years studying energetic body I can recognize that she has also studied this and the way she has you move your body is very Very much on purpose and it's getting like way. I was telling you any she got your bunda to activate That's what you were feeling was that fun to activation, which is you said isn't really spoken about in Reiki the bundas now a 70 hour talking about this last night and It's kind of this I love how you said like it's not really a time for us to be like listening to gossipy youtubers or You know getting more Intel because most of the Intel that's out there isn't real anyway Because there's literally like five people that know what's gonna happen And that's how it has to be to keep it top secret, right? And so 70 I was speaking about this with with Marnie Alton for example. She's not awake She's not someone she doesn't know that mr. T is actually a good guy She's not someone that is aware of what's happening behind the scenes with some of these like elite people Okay, however However in my opinion She is actually more awake than more truthers are even though. She doesn't know the Intel she's fucking worked on herself and She's very she's you know, we have these people in truth or community that have all this Intel But yet they're lying. They're cheating. They're being mean. They're doxing people They're fear mongering That's low vibration That's low vibration That's not fourth-density positive behavior and they have someone like Marnie Alton who isn't aware of the Intel But is coming every day to her to her practices to her clients to her students from a place of genuine love and Genuine she's a stronghold for her students. She's helping them break through their own barriers I mean, there have been some of her classes that I have taken where I'm sobbing After I'm done because of things that she has said while working on a particular part of the body and even one of the classes she said We're not fully awake until we're in our body Right and to understand and she talks about a lot in a lot of her classes about the dance between the darkness and the light But the darkness is necessary to understand the light And so that's what I want to propose is you brought this up And me is we have to stop thinking about while I'm awake because I know this this this and this about the world But yet I'm gonna be an asshole to people and I'm gonna lie and I'm gonna cheat I'm gonna be violent and I'm gonna threaten and I'm gonna be fear fear mongering instead of coming from a place of love Then you have someone over here that doesn't know that this facts about the world But is coming from a place of love because they've worked on themselves in my opinion She is more awake than most of the truthers are And even though she doesn't know That mr. T is a good guy She'll I believe she'll be writing out this ascension with us And I because of the work she's done on herself if I had to guess my speculation is the minute She realizes the truth She's gonna be able to step in and start helping because she's done so much work on herself that she can be that stronghold And so I really want to encourage everybody watching right now Do not face yourself as being awakened because you know certain things about these islands or about these You know Controllers trying to be careful what I say for YouTube base yourself on how awake you are about how much work You're doing on yourself. Are you a nice person? Are you coming to people with from a place of love and a place of honesty? Are you working on yourself? Are you humble? That's what your vibration is is rising up. The other stuff is just the details That makes sense. I don't know Stephanie if you want to add something to that or not Being what we label red pill is a multi layered multi dimensional Multi layers of spirituality like it's all layers and like when I first awakened to everything it was just the facts the Tunnel systems and all that kind of stuff and the really heartbreaking portion of what we're learning about what these powers that be due to young ones right And I went through my own little dark night of the soul during that period and then it was little tricklets of awakening with certain things like Figuring out that the way the pastor has taught me about the bible is not exactly the way It's actually written it's their way and in portraying it their way And I took it into my own hands and brought my power back in by interpreting it my way And then the next thing I know I'm realizing. Okay. Well, this actually was written by probably satanist So I'm like It you're it's like taking an onion and peeling back layer after layer after layer there's layers to this It's not just intel. It's not just the facts that are coming through. It's What are you doing with yourself? What work have you done to yourself? Don't just sit there watching video after video after video if you're doing that you're obviously escaping something It's more or less. You have to figure out. Why did I choose to be born during this period of time? What do I have to do for myself to heal myself to help myself grow spiritually? In order to go forward helping others you cannot help others if your cup is Empty you have to have a full cup in order to help others This is the time of rest and reprieve and breaking through Um your own um matrices and your own illusions so that when the time comes you can help others Break through their own illusions and and help them regain their own um sovereignty and their own power It's it's all layers. So I hope that makes sense Yeah, I want to bring an example about to like mean girl behavior What we would call mean girl behavior and it's really bothering me the fact that we find it to have so interest So much interest to figure out if someone was actually born a man or a woman First of all a lot of these people's and these these controlling groups of people if they were changed as a child And they don't know they were changed That's heartbreaking That's heartbreaking and they need our our compassion and our empathy First of all when you see these people labeling these people as either being born male or female, that's mean That's really really mean and i'm going to give you an example of this People have said that kate middleton was born Not a kate. We'll say try to be careful what I say on youtube Well, there are and they they're looking at the cards, which cards are never going to tell you this anyway, right? They're it's not a crystal ball. It's just cards well, there's certain um Biological markers on a human body that can't be changed Even if you change one of them being the collar bones And the other day I was watching some footage over the funeral and I noticed that she had a Outfit on that showed her collar bones and I thought that's interesting She has female collar bones My collar bones are female. You can see them female collar bones go up into a v up into the shoulder. You see that That's a female collar bone I was born a female obviously I'm the girliest of girls. Did you'll ever meet? That's a female collar bone. It goes up to my shoulder male collar bones Go out to the side You can't change that And so i'm thinking about kate middleton and how many people have started these rumors And I think regardless of whether she's a good person or a bad person I think i'm sitting there thinking how fucking mean How cruel How shameful That us who consider ourselves to be awakened Are contributing to this mean girl vile abusive narcissistic behavior We're no better than the people we plant fingers at on the other side Who are shaming people for not getting this Are shaming people for not doing this We're no better when we behave that way How dare us And let's say kate was born a male and switched over As a baby. She did not consent to that. That wasn't her choice Also being a divinator myself. We should not be divinating for gossip purposes No, that's low low vibrational. Yeah, and we should not be Channeling anybody without their consent. I don't know how many times we got to say that So I know there's still people who are very They're they're having a hard time understanding this concept I'm not just going to go bust into someone. I'm not going to go bust into brice's medical files Now if rice showed me a blood test of hers and said hey step I know you know a lot about blood tests. What do you think about this? And I said You know and I looked at it was her consent I'm not just going to go through her medical files and pull out let's say Let's say I was your medical assistant price, you know, I roomed you or something. Are you Emmy? You know, you gave me consent being the patient But if I was a medical assistant for another doctor and I had access to your records And I snooped in those records and got caught. I'd get fired right on the spot without any questions You know, I mean, it's the same exact thing. It's breaking confidentiality In somebody's private life, you know what I mean? It's it's it's a violation. It's a universal violation So nobody should be doing that with the cards Not to mention. Are we trying to get away from this whole Gossip type of You know programming that we've been in Yeah, and I was like that's high school behavior. It's middle school behavior. I think I think your your teenager is more Grounded when it comes to some of the adult truthers out there that are in and what what are mean girls? What are mean people they're projecting their own issues onto somebody else So when you're engaging in this behavior and that's the only thing you'll watch is these these gossip channels You're you're avoiding working on yourself It's like we know bullies abuse people because they don't want to deal with their own shit So you've become a bully that won't deal with your own shit. What does it matter? I've said this so many time and time again. First of all, I don't care What sex someone was born as that has nothing to do with my own relationship with God in my own spirituality What I care about are their crimes and those will be presented in a court of law And none of the other stuff isn't any of my business All right, and so I wanted to but I mean I really I I watch these channels on narcissism a lot and I watch on Psychology is very fascinating to me and the biggest thing that therapists look for is empathy If someone cannot display empathy just cannot do it Then we have a problem They're either a narcissist or a psychopath or sociopath So everybody watching right now. I want you to sit there for a moment How would you feel? How would you feel? If someone you didn't know was publicly pulling cards on you And saying that you were not born the sex you were born How would you feel? Probably not that great And so that should dictate the way we treat other people do and that's one of the good things in the bible It says do unto others as you would have them do unto you. That's empathy That's empathy And so I really I I'm getting it's it's getting kind of It's kind of pissing me off a little bit because it's just it's it's we're no different The people and and ricardo bozzi spoke about this. We need to come from a place of love If we're if we think we're better than the people who are asleep, then we need to act that way We need to act that way. We need to work on ourselves. We need to be loving. We need to be compassionate We need to understand that we are all just walking each other home Right time comes we should not be Out in the street sailing at others saying I told you so that is absolutely the opposite of what we should be doing we should be holding these people in our arms while they cry on our shoulder and um Being compassionate and loving to them Because their souls chose not to wake up before everything and how scary is it going to be for those people to be shaken and aroused awake so suddenly like it's like when you're in the middle of This really really deep sleep And your little kid comes out in the middle of the night and shakes you awake and scares the living for jesus out of you It's it's going to be they're going to be shaken to wake and they're not going to have all this time that we've had to process things So we do need to show Love and compassion toward those people. That's one of the reasons why we came here for this time is to show compassion for those people Right? So in the meantime before that happens Um, we need to better ourselves. We need to definitely step up and Stop being the gossipy Non-compassionate bitchy People that we've been programmed to be start first you need to bust out of these programs We're we're programmed to be mean we're programmed to not have compassion. We're programmed to judge others We really need to break free of that. That's again another programming that we need to really bust out of Yeah And again, I just bring it back to how would you feel? How would you feel? If you were kate middleton Yeah, how would you feel? Do unto others as you would have them do unto you practice your empathy It doesn't take I mean if you're a narcissist or a psychopath you're not going to be able to understand that But if you're a normal human being with a soul You're going to have that realization And I and I I know that the two ladies on my screen right now have empathy And I know most of my viewers have empathy. I get your emails. I read your emails Most of the people watching right now are so beautiful and so Have amazing hearts and so we just need to and that's that's the thing too It's like this war in the beginning of this war. This was an information war But the overall crux of this war is that it's a spiritual war And if we're looking at spirituality, we're looking at vibrational frequency So it doesn't matter what you know in your head What matters is the vibration you're carrying within your soul and your body So if you know shit in your head, but you're gossiping and you're just watching these low vibrational shows Then you're not evolving. You're staying in a low vibration But if you're taking the information you get you're working through You're having your dark night of the soul and you're stepping aside to work on yourself Then guess what? You're doing the work And you're raising your vibration Yeah, does that make sense? I hope that makes sense You see i'm getting red because this really upsets me like this really upsets me um this mean girl I am I will be 40 years old in february of of 2023 And I have seen people Behave worse in this truth or community Then they did with the high schoolers and middle schoolers are behaving right now There are 12 year olds out 12 year old girls out there that have more empathy and compassion than some of the people in this Truth or community who are 40 years old 50 years old Yeah, when we don't when we don't work on our inner child That inner child is What comes forth to people so if we're stuck in ego and and we can be red pilled And still be stuck very much in spiritual ego Like if you have ever felt the need to say to someone well, don't you know Don't you know this that and the other? That's very it's coming from a place of of ego if When we can transcend that and look upon all people no matter what they do think say or believe And see them as god sees us as as a perfect being Who just has a lot of disharmony at this time if we can see them as god sees them the Inconsistencies in our beliefs won't really matter. It doesn't matter um, and so I think a lot of of these people who have um Inner child inner children that aren't healed That's what's coming forth. It's it's because It's such a touchy subject because you know, I don't I know we're preaching to the choir here And I don't want to point fingers like our audiences are are behaving this way I know that probably a lot of people that watch us watch these other things other channels too And that's fine. You know wherever you're at is fine We're we're always in the right place at the right time with the right people doing and saying the right things and if you Adopt that philosophy and believe that you can accept wherever you are at this point in time and love yourself And and be able to love others where they're at and not not come at them and say well, don't you know Don't you know that she did this? Don't you know that he does that? That stuff is is is completely irrelevant Um when we're looking at things from a place of spiritual growth Facts and details and incal And things that are going on or things that are not going on is is really quite irrelevant. It's about healing our Healing our bodies our trauma so that we can completely descend into this body And completely be in our body And then we can ascend and I think so so Many people could be helped if all of these channels who are presenting intel and information Would just encourage people to work on themselves The world is not going to change until we change the best thing we can do is heal ourselves In fact, that's the only thing that's going to um I want to say cause but that's the only thing that's going to facilitate this Ascension is healing ourselves. No amount of intel. No amount of red pilling No amount of knowing this or knowing that is going to help us ascend Yes, it's helpful knowing what the world really is like because we've been lied to about everything So It helps to be aware awareness is is very important But until we take ownership and responsibility Of the things that need to be healed in us and another thing whatever bothers you about another person Is what needs to be healed in you? Whatever is triggering you whatever is making you angry Take a look at that within yourself um because it The whole physical 3d reality is a mirror to show us what we need to work on So, you know if i'm super irritated by what Someone for my husband's family says to me Instead of pointing fingers at that person. Oh, you made me so mad, you know, how dare you? um I try to and and it's hard to catch It's really hard to catch and turn it around on yourself and take ownership of that and responsibility because we forget We're not taught how to do this stuff. So once we learn how to do it and we start practicing it We still forget we still forget. I had something happen just recently um where I tried to make amends to Uh an in-law and it backfired because she can't see my perspective she can only see herself She's an act of addiction right now. She took what I was saying Um as I was trying to guilt trip her and that was not my intention But that's all she can see because that's what needs to be healed in her Does that make sense? So it's like Whatever bothers you instead of pointing fingers at the person and Making them responsible for how you feel Go inward. Okay. What is it that I did? I do something like this to someone and that's triggering me and pointing this out to me or do I do I Have an issue with such and such, you know Is there some kind of attachment or belief in lack or belief in control that I need to look at? um, just start noticing those things and When you can notice them and become aware of them Then you have the ability and the power to do something about it and to take action And the sooner that we can take ownership and responsibility for everything that happens in our life The sooner we can ascend and the sooner we can bring in this golden age It's not about anybody else It's about you I say something real quick. I um I just want to put out there too. Don't wait for med bed to fix you either because Med beds will meet you only where you are vibrationally It's not a one-time fix all and then you're good to go. You still have to work on yourself Yeah, I'm in a lot of people and I was guilty of doing this when I first wake into everything um Are just waiting for that magical med bed And the reality is if you're low vibrational, it's not going to do anything for you You have to you have to raise your vibration You have to work on yourself if you want those these new technologies to meet you Um in a space where it's it's really going to help you. You really have to still work on yourself regardless So I wanted to mention that really quick because there is this misconception out there that this is the Heal all fix all you don't have to do any work on yourself kind of a thing Yeah, I'm I agree with you. It makes me so mad when people are like, oh, I'll lose weight in the med bed. No, you won't No, you won't It's the whole savior mentality Yeah, people are waiting for someone to come in and make it better and save them And I'm guilty of that as well You know, there are certain things that I have put off and it's like I'll just wait until You know blotty blot happens. No If if I see something and notice something in myself, I have to take ownership of that I've taken responsibility for that. That's my shit It's my shit and I need to work on it. Nobody's going to heal it for me. I mean, I've spent so much of my life Help me. Help me. Help me. What do I do? What do I do about this and and that's fine if that's where you are That's fine. That's it. That's where you're supposed to be But when you can get over that hump over that mountain And take ownership and responsibility for absolutely everything If if you're hurt by someone The law of attraction the law of karma the law of reaping and sowing it's all the same thing What goes around comes around all the same thing Take a look at your past and see if there was an area Where you may have done that to someone else because everything comes full circle You know, it's it's very empowering and very liberating when you can take ownership of everything in your life You know, it's a little bit different for children when they go through trauma because they don't have a choice They don't have any control over Themselves or their lives. So that's a little bit different. But as we grow into adults, it's still our responsibility to go back to those childhood wounds And do things to heal that child heal that inner child be your own parent Read parenting books and parent yourself and i'm not kidding. I know that sounds funny to some people But if we don't know how to parent Read a book parent yourself Even if you've had no no children, you know, read a parenting book. How to parent yourself I I was a huge fan of attachment parenting And all of my children are very very independent today because of All of their needs and i'm not a perfect mom. I've made so many mistakes but Addressing their needs and being there and and nurturing the child is so incredibly important for their future mental health You'll have a very independent healthy person as an adult if They had their needs met as a child And if you didn't have your needs met as a child and you don't know how to parent Read a book on parenting parent yourself. I parented my inner child for like two years until she was Healthy enough to integrate into this grown-up person And it was incredibly freeing and liberating and there were so many times when I just bawled my eyes out So Picturing myself holding myself as a child Don't worry. I've got you now Getting all emotional think about it because it's such a beautiful experience It's such a beautiful experience when you can take the reins and Have power not power like Power over someone or something but power over your own life And you can give yourself What it is that you need because when you can give yourself what it is that you need you don't need it from anybody else You're not looking for it in anyone else I have a story a couple years ago. My husband Did something that was really hurtful and I was sulking and I was Really bitter about it and I I was doing some meditation and I bought myself a bouquet of flowers And I did for myself what I wanted him to do for me And that was the most significant bouquet of flowers. I've ever gotten Was ones that I I bought for myself So if you can do for yourself what you need from other people You won't need it from other people and then you're free to be able to give that To everyone else, you know, I Aaron Abki says I only lack what I don't give That's beautiful It really is beautiful So yeah, we we kind of got into some really deep stuff didn't we my therapist did the same thing with me about Taking care of the little girl. I ended up in trauma therapy because I Had gone through a string of abusive relationships almost lost my life one night long story But I ended up in trauma therapy and that was one of the best things that ever happened to me because we had to wind it back to my childhood and And she kept saying you're now responsible for taking care of the little girl who wasn't taking care of as a child And there's a story out to I'll give another story too of how how easy this is to do. Sorry guys My nose is running like crazy again. Um When I when I was doing AMDR therapy I had to think of a time when I was a small child when I when I If you remembered something from childhood, there's a reason why you remembered it and this was a time where I had gotten wounded I remember being in the car with my dad. My dad was driving I was probably like eight or nine years old. I was sitting in the front seat because back in the dark ages We didn't have booster seats for you know, you just sat in the front seat And I remember telling my dad something about what I wanted to do when I Was a grown-up and I was really excited about it And I remember where we were on turn of the call boulevard. I remember exactly we're passing the movie theater It's in my mind Now it's telling my dad about what I wanted to do and all my dad said it. He goes, no, you won't you won't do that No, you won't But that was what my dad did a lot to us dad. I'm cold. No, you're not Dad, I'm hungry. No, you're not Dad, I don't like this food. No, yes, you do And so that was a huge wound for me as a child and my therapist said to me Because I'm an anti the nephew of nieces at that point just a nephew and a niece My youngest niece wasn't born yet and my therapist said to me okay as an adult If you were driving in the car and your nephew said that to you about what he wanted to do when he was a grown-up How would you respond to it and I I said I'd be like that sounds so exciting charlie That sounds so exciting. I hope that you get to do that one day. That is so cool And she goes okay now say that to yourself Say that to your little girl as you as that little girl That got wounded by her dad because her dad basically dismissed What she wanted to do It's that easy and in which we might when the therapist said that to me. I was like, oh That makes sense. So go back every time where I was wounded How would I as an adult handle that to my niece and nephew? And then say that to myself as a child Right. Yes, and then you could also go a step further too and look at your dad And have empathy and compassion for your dad because he probably had the same thing done to him And that's why he did what he did. Oh, yeah, he had his own dreams crushed And was possibly get slit as a child. And so that's what you know When especially for men, it's really difficult Getting in touch with emotions and being able to express emotions as a man Because any kind of Emotion other than anger is often unacceptable to a man So because they're not able to express those feelings like fear and sadness and grief They're not allowed to express those as a child They grow up thinking that those emotions aren't okay. And then everything comes out as anger You know, it's a very common theme in a lot of men That they're just not able to Have and feel and express these kinds of emotions because when they grew up it wasn't acceptable It wasn't okay, you know a parent A lot of the times doesn't know how to handle or doesn't know what to do when a child is afraid or sad And when they're screaming and crying and causing distress The parent just wants the distress to stop so they you know, send them away They don't teach them how to process this emotion. They don't say it's okay to be sad. It's okay to be angry however We should express it like this Not like this and then give them examples of things to do but a person can't do that Unless they've done that the work themselves. So we've got to be chain breakers. I'm sure we have all had instances where We've been told that a certain emotion is not okay You know and and not maybe not told that directly But that was implied through the reaction that our parents had You know, it was it's implied that okay. It's not okay for me to be sad or afraid because I get in trouble I have to go spend my time alone with my feelings when i'm that because okay, so that's not okay for me to feel that way It's okay for me to be you know mad dad gets mad. It's okay for me to be mad. So then they Cover up and hide and stuff all of these emotions that really need to be expressed in a healthy manner and cover it with anger Yeah, I used to get in trouble as a kid. I had said this once. I don't know when camera goes off camera I used to get in trouble all the time. I know Stephanie. We've talked about this as a child for standing up for myself So like if I express something that I like if I um Like I hate it. I I loathe The school that I went to the high school not the middle school or the lower school but the high school that for school I loathe it. It was this very Preppy private school. I drove Stephanie through it. There was shit going on there. I was Very much abused there and I loathe it and I would try to talk to my parents about it But there was like this kind of this wall and I guess I'll go ahead and say I've talked with this off I had a memory come up when I was I talked to Stephanie about it When I was 15 years old, I forgot what it's called Stephanie when your uterus falls out. What's it called? Oh, um, it's a prolapse uterus. I had a prolapse uterus at 15. I wrote our 14 15 I remember it. I remember the feeling of it starting to fall out through my lady bits And my mother took me to the pediatrician because I was still going to the pediatrician at that time I think I I loved my pediatrician. I would still go about pediatrician even though 39 But and I remember her actually saying to my mom they had to push it back in my uterus back in And the the pediatrician saying to my mom like this is a sign and I'm going to have to believe this word out well of um sexual Will just say misconduct With a child At this point, I was a virgin and I don't My mother very much dismissed it didn't do anything about it was just very much like nope She couldn't handle it. We just went about our lives And these memories are starting to come back now And I remember in trauma therapy my my um therapist saying you do show signs of somebody who was inappropriately Will just say touched when you were smaller. I have to be careful what I see on youtube And even though the memory is not super clear I'm showing the signs of that and so what I realized especially even still going through it now at 39 is that When these traumas were happening and the people in my life that were supposed to protect me We're protecting themselves instead I from the reality I started to um interpret that is that I don't matter Me is and of course having my dad dismiss us. I walked into I walked through life thinking I don't matter I deserve the short end of the stick. I deserve The crappy situation. I don't deserve the raise at my job. I deserve to work 80 hours a week and get no pay I deserve I that's why I was in and out of all these abusive relationships because that's how I understood love was abuse And it took me literally getting to the point where I almost lost my life one night. I was strangled one night from an x That put me into trauma therapy That I started to untangle What's called complex post-traumatic stress disorder and that's why it's complex It's not post-traumatic stress disorder post-traumatic stress disorders from like one event That the complex is that it's layered. It's layered And so having to untangle all that and it's something I know that I'm going to be working on for the rest of my life And I still have a hard time standing up for myself I still have struggled with that like I have actually like how dare I stand up for myself I mean Proof the point was proven just a couple weeks ago when I tried to stand up for myself and fix my absence and look What happened Right and so we're still struggling and we're still having as human beings to work through these things You know and when we ignore them when we don't work through them We stay stuck We stay in that hanged man position and we have to just keep and the beautiful thing about god And our souls is that our souls are eternal. There's no finish line So god doesn't care how long it's going to take you to figure this out You'll just keep reliving life after life after life after life until you actually finally do it So why not do it in this life? Why not just do it? Why not just work on yourself because it's going to follow you from life up It doesn't matter how much you know about the truth of the matrix and and let's be honest guys like You know, my dad's dad used to say like the only person you can control is yourself. That's it There's nothing we can do as an individual as Bryce. There's nothing I can do about what was happening on those islands I can't do anything about the past. I can't change the past We know that that stuff is still happening. It hasn't stopped. It's still going on It's not as bad as it was but it is still going on but there are people who are trained to deal with it But what can I do is Bryce? What can I do is me? I can work on myself I can heal myself And it's like Catherine said this one. It's like those vibrating forks when one vibrating fork tuning fork is up here The one down here is naturally going to start to rise as well And so if everybody watching just took the time to just just You're never going to be finished working yourself But just the fact that you start you get that ball rolling And say today you sit down you say I'm just going to journal about something that happened You know as a child you've started that ball rolling and guess what your vibration is already starting to rise and it's going to affect your spouse It's going to affect your neighbor That's the power you have and collectively we all started doing that We won't have to I mean I said this in the last episode and and bachardo bozi said this as well Yes, there are certain events that are scheduled to happen. But as far as when we actually flip it depends on us It depends on when we wake up really wake up Not just waking up to this or this or that but to wake up to us To who we are descending into ourselves And maybe that's why some of the infiltrator truthers are doing gossip tarot shows because they don't want you to heal yourself Think about it that way They want to distract you over here so that you don't do the work over here that you need to do So take your power back That's one thing Stephanie and I have been uh I've known jesse's a voter for a while now and she's become such a good friend during this time to me and actually I have to show you I'm going to show this jesse. Just sent me this. It's amazing. Thank you jesse I'm going to figure out a way to put it back here You see the girl the lion and she's got her dress on and her boots on because she's going to war So i'm going to find a place. Thank you jesse and i'll put jesse's links down in the description box below guys for her website It is a very cool picture. Um, so thank you jesse that meant a lot to me and your card was very sweet I cried when I read it this morning. Um But you know, we've been working a lot with jesse and even she tells you do that right through our work. Where are your wounds? Wait because that's where the darkness has permission to come in Wherever your wounds are they're using that as permission to come in And so every single night before I go to bed. I call back. I actually say no You don't have permission To manipulate or use any of my wounds the ones that i'm aware of and the ones that i'm not even aware of you cannot use them And every night I sit there and I call back my soul I call back my soul. I call back every essence of my soul that has been used and abused and wounded and I call back my blood I call that back as well And I call my power back And if I could and even if everybody watching the night just before you go to bed tonight Just sit on the bed and close your eyes and say I call back my soul I call it back I call it back because every time in my opinion every time someone hurts us we drop a little bit of our essence Every time we don't stand up for ourselves. We drop a little bit of our essence Every time we engage in a destructive behavior like gossip or you know, whatever we drop a little bit of our essence And so if we start to call that back into us We call that sovereignty back Every night we call it back What a difference that would make in the world I did that the other day. I mean well not the other day about three weeks ago I felt so pulled By different people and close to in my life um one person's telling me to think this way and one person is telling me this way and it got to the point where It was distracting me from what I need to do And I knew that it was happening because I had to recognize something within me and that was allowing people even those that I love the most to Manipulate how I think and act and what I say and do and it's like I had to take back my power. So I have those those reiki candles And this one was specifically for power And I lit it and I did like a half an hour prayer calling in my soul calling back my power anybody who has Purposely or non purposely taken a a piece of my essence Throughout my life and my life has completely um Done a 180 since I did that. Um, I actually have been able to stand up for myself a lot more confident than I could In addition to that when I do stand up for myself I I have the bad habit of being passive aggressive Because I take take take take take and then I explode And now I can address things right on the spot. I don't take take take anymore I just address it when it needs to be addressed right from the beginning So it doesn't turn into this big massive explosion Um of me getting angry because that was something I Desperately needed to work on. I've been praying to god to help me with that part of who I am for years I've always known that's a big weakness in me is just As an empath just taking and taking and taking and all of a sudden I can't take anymore and I just Like a ticking time BOMB, you know what I mean? So it's it's one thing I have Desperately tried to work on myself and There was a lot of trial and error with it But when I said that's myself and I still say it. It's not that one time. I constantly have to re remind myself Um It's made a big impact just saying those words Um, you know our words are spell cast whether they're good or bad, right? What what's the intention behind it? so it's funny that you know The church tells you not to cast spells, but our words are spell castings for prayers for spells Right the thing is I'm I'm taking back my power and the thing is too. It's like when you are constantly Escaping from something and giving your power over to a tv screen or not saying that watching tv is is bad all together You know, sometimes we do need that little bit of a distraction once in a while When it's becoming a really like extreme habit and it's taking away from you working on yourself That's what i'm talking about I mean obviously like brice you watch real housewives when you need to escape for two seconds, you know My escapism is is my piano playing and that's another part that I've really had to work on is I remember as a fourth grader I was the worst flute player in the class for approximately a week couldn't get a sound out of that damn thing I remember the moment. I made a sound out of it I remember I I was never good at sight reading put my headphones on one day and i'm going to get made fun of so bad I really don't care though. I have an obsession with soundtrack music But at that time it was star war soundtrack music And I would play nine hours a day in the summertime to my flute with my headphones My ears just playing along to the entire soundtrack. That's that's what I would do That was my escapism as a child. I didn't play the video games. I wasn't into tv That was what I did. I had no life except for that and being outside because I was outside a lot too And I remember going into the classroom and being so proud of myself that I learned all these songs and I had All these girls looking at me like mean girls, right? And they would put me down And so I stopped showing the teacher what I could do because I thought I was showing off I wasn't trying to be show offy at all. There was no Major ego behind it. It was like I was proud of myself because I had never Understood how to be proud of myself up until then, you know, I had gone through a lot of things in my Very very young years that were not healthy for any child to go through at all And so this was something that really was helping me become Me like it was it was like boosting me up and then when those girls did that It really brought me into a place of complete despair and hating myself once again And then I got into a piano playing and I remember saying to My the mother who raised me. She's not my biological mother. Hey ma. I wrote a song on the piano I'm so excited to show her And all she said was That's okay. It's not the greatest And ever since then I have a hard time playing in front of anybody I have had Moments where I just want to quit and that's something I've had to work on with myself Um, I've had a couple people in my life say, oh my god, you're amazing at it But no amount of words help because it's not my mom So she does not realize that one day what she did to me And I do feel sorry for her because I don't think she realizes. I don't think she meant it on purpose, but that was That was traumatizing for me that one little sentence. And so that's something I've had to work on with myself is Does Stephanie like her own music? Can I do I like the music I've created? And ever since then I've actually had a hard time even writing music because I used to write music all the time And make up songs and everything so now I'm trying to get myself back into that and go It doesn't matter what anybody else thinks of the song. How do I like it? Do I love what I created? Same goes for my art my paintings and my jewelry and all that kind of stuff And it comes from that that wound that happened back when I was in sixth grade or eighth grade. Yeah, eighth grade Yeah But you recognize it and that's the best part of healing is recognizing and and you're right, Emmy when you start to look at like Where your parents wombs are I mean with my father's situation like here he is In his sixties now and he doesn't have a relationship with his children He barely sees his grandchildren so Obviously, there's something with him that that and you you have to detach that like He treated your mom treated you that way My dad treated me this way because of something with them and it was projected onto you as a child and as a child I think too as children we see our parents as being almost like superheroes Like if mom and dad say this is right then it's right and there comes this point where we have to realize that our parents are just people they're just humans and they mess up a lot and And that's their path to walk. That's their journey and you know, I was I was always the weird kid too You know, I think we all all of us watching can I always had paranormal experiences and um I don't think my even though that's very common in the south. I don't think my parents I talked about it a lot um No one really wanted to they to really address it. You know, I just kind of left me off to the side to deal with it by myself and But that was their issue. That's their fear At this point at 39 years old not much scares me when it comes to the paranormal anymore. I'll sleep in a haunted house. No problem Because I've you know, so so then we look at like, okay. Well, what's the journey? You know You're an incredible artist Stephanie. I've seen your painting I've seen you know, and you've gone through that journey of self-discovery again Sometimes as we spoke about last time that friction that darkness is what propels us to actually move through the journey of that self-discovery too Actually create masterpieces in my darkness. Yeah, that's when I paint the best. That's when I Create really emotional music on piano um is through that darkness and without that darkness I would not have the appreciation for Honestly without darkness we would not appreciate the light. No Because we wouldn't understand the polarity the duality of everything, right? It helps us Actually start to like like I said to you brice on a show we did last week. Um I had said that um Because I have lacked really good friends in my life and this goes for you too emmy Like because I lack good friends in my life and I've always had friends really just Use an abuse me kind of a thing just they they get what they want out of the relationship and just kind of take off and I I lack those boundaries for myself and everything and I kept calling in friends that were not For my highest good now that I really have true friends. I appreciate I appreciate the fact that I have true friends now Versus if I never went through that heartache does that make sense? Oh, yeah, it teaches you so much about Honor and respected integrity when you when you lack that when you go without that when you absolutely And I feel the same way about you girls as well I feel like I could call you about anything and it would you know, I trust both of you with my life You know, I know any things I tell you guys you're not going to repeat that it's going to you know, absolutely Absolutely. Well, it's even larney alton said um once in our classes and I'm paraphrasing We know when the sperm hits the egg there's a spark of light Right, that's the divine spark. But then that divine spark nestles into the dark womb womb For nine months Interesting you said wound wound. Yes, that's really interesting I I think they're I don't know about you guys, but lately I have really felt this very Um intense presence of the need to heal this mother wound You know generationally and ancestrally um Just because the divine feminine has been so suppressed and we've we've been living in this Um toxic masculinity like might is right, you know, and that's no and I think a lot of um twin flame unions to the divine feminine as being activated first And I have a book on that actually I'll tell you too because I just did the reading for next week for the divine or for the divine Sophia And I've said this before yeah So when you say this is toxic masculinity because what's happened is if you take the divine feminine away You're also taking the divine masculine away too Because the divine masculine and the divine feminine work together as one and when a divine masculine is in his proper Attunement and alignment. He's going to be sensitive. He's going to be caring And strong at the same time. So he's going to be able to sit and play tea party with his little girl And then get up and and protect his family at the same time And the same thing for women because we carry both energies too a woman can be the intuitive That's why I love this picture so much like how divine feminine is that? Right, I'll turn the light up for a second so you guys can see Like she's got her pretty dress on but then she's got those duff martins on where she's going to go to war I mean there's a lion right there. That's why I like it because like That that feels like me like I can be that intuitive Very girly. I like my sparkles. I like my polka dots, but boy, I can play in the mud You know like we do have that that equal Energy and it the whole toxic masculinity. It's also a distorted masculine So it's like that aggressive mars type energy feeling Where they've taken out that masculine energy with that softer or Or the or society has overly softened the male To where they're too much of the other does that make sense? And so it's like there's no balance in the the thing that I've been actually getting in the cards with my collective readings is The balancing of these two energies. I don't know if you guys have been watching my collective readings but I've been getting a lot of this balance between the two energies that is more healthy and more sufficient to go forward and In that they're working simultaneously together as a team And no more trying to break apart dividing destroying everything lucifer does So what I said, you're getting that. Sorry brice. I just want to say this it's really interesting you're getting that in the cards because that's What's going on with? um Our communication plan at mercury is in libra Libra is all about balance and if we have balance with our communication um Yeah, that it's so cool to have um So cool to have different Means of intuition support each other support. What's going on collectively? Going on astrologically everything is connected. Yes But do you know why the woman activates first? Why Because because it starts from the woman. So when a The sperm hits the egg and this is a divine Sophia return and I also knew this I first reminded because I remember studying this in science When the embryo first exists it exists as female. Yeah, that's why men have nipples also The mother Sophia births out The soul It's not the male form of god that births out the soul. It's the feminine part the mother of god That births out the soul when your soul is birthed because you go through a soul birth first before you're Physically born into whatever realm you go into and that is in the book I can't reach it right now because i'm a little short. I need a ladder step stool It's called twin flames in the event book. I believe is the book I read it in it makes a lot of sense Um, and it might be is it in the sopia code too? I believe that isn't Magdalen manuscript talks about that that magdalen actually um activated yashua But it's because the female was first the female came first We were that's why they're removing out of this throughout this luciferian time period as they they've removed that And it doesn't mean the masculine isn't as important It's got a different role to play and both roles when done correctly Work harmoniously in You know vibrationally speaking and and just every part of life really You got to have that that that balance. So that is interesting that you said mercury is in Libra, right? And i'm a Libran so I know all about balance so Before we get back to the asset, so this is something that came up in the up It's in the apocryphon books which are the missing books of the bible And I also spoke about it when I was reading the divine Sophia and my recording And I know people are going to get pissy about this and if you get pissy Just figure out why it's triggering you so much because this is actually in the apocryphon books that were taken out of the bible The garden of eden according to the apocryphon books was a jail. It was lucifer's jail so the snake was kundalini that eve activated The kundalini which then she activated adam a eve comes from coming from adam's rib cage to me says they were twin souls They were of the same soul and two that's a it's a metaphor of two feminine masculine from the same soul kundalini activation happened for eve first because she's the female She activated adam and then they were able to leave the confat the confines of the matrix This is what the apocryphon books teach from the bible This is why they were taken out of the bible the apocryphon books also talk about Sophia as well All right, so that's why kundalini You know we see that represented as the snake and people like oh the snake is bad the snake is bad The first of all god created snakes do just like he created goats and owls They've been inverted by this group just like everything else has been inverted by this group But what did the snake always represented to the christ consciousness that kundalini rising? It's just a thought It's just a thought and if it that triggers you okay, where are you programmed? Why is that triggering you? Why can't you just entertain an idea without accepting it, right? So um, so anyway, but let's get back. So what else is happening astrologically? I know we took a little detail right there We're just gonna. Yeah, my gosh. It's been an hour Well when when emi's all set I pulled a bunch of cards here So I can go into the energies after she's done We'll you want to quickly wrap it up. So I know you have somewhere to be emi so Yes, okay. So the other thing I want to talk about astrologically is a A square it's not an exact square, but let's let's just refresh what a aspect of a square is The square aspects and the opposition aspects are very activating. It's motivating. It's about achievement they get a negative wrap because It it creates this tension and this drive within us, okay And that can be seen as disharmonious because it's uncomfortable It is basically lighting a fire under our butts and it causes us to achieve something to grow to do something to take action So those are the square and the opposition aspects are our achievement aspects So you've got Saturn which is a retrograde and Aquarius right now and You have Uranus which is also retrograde in Taurus And they're they're making an almost square and they come as close to the square as possible between September 23rd and October 23rd And let's just think about the themes for a minute of each of these planets. So Saturn is all about Control structures the matrix government authority that kind of stuff Uranus is about swift moving change Throwing a monkey wrench into it doesn't care about traditions doesn't care about beliefs. It's like change now So you've got The matrix and you've got swift moving change. So From the end of this month to the end of October, I would expect the unexpected With the matrix with government with control with authority with all of those kinds of themes in the world Expect the unexpected I I think there may be a bit of a shake up that we're we're not Really contemplating at the moment. So I have no idea what it is neither does brice or stufany But I think something um something a bit shaken up is it's about to come down the pike. So And and there are six planets in retrograde right now and holy shit. Yeah six You've got Neptune and Pisces which It's in its its ruling sign and Neptune is all about Um spirituality and dreams and the dream world and so is Pisces and so when you have a planet in its sign In retrograde, it's just really digging into that stuff So that makes sense along with What's going on with all of the spirituality and the spiritual changes and the upheaval and and the growth and the development Saturn is a retrograde and Aquarius Uranus is retrograde and torus mercaries retrograde and Libra Jupiter is retrograde and aries and Pisces It's like it's in areas right now, but it's going to go back to Pisces before it goes to direct again And Jupiter is all about abundance and growth and expansion And when we have it in the sign of aries, which is Very explosive fiery energy So if you just think about all of these themes working together simultaneously All of them in retrograde, which is like A slowdown a shake up a a mix up I I just kind of anticipate something major coming down the pike and in the next the rest of the year the major changes I don't know what you know, I don't think any of us knows what I think a very few people know what and That's I guess about five people in the world Yeah, and I have contacts and I've tried trust me. I've tried to get information and Even the top top people don't know everything because only literally probably about five people actually know So and that's okay. I think I'd rather not know I know right I'd rather just work on myself and do my yoga And my research Get ready for the cards. Yeah, let's hear it. So I did past present and future I'm starting to divinate with runes Having a load of fun with these. Okay, if you guys don't know where runes are This comes from like the db odin Thor It's the viking stuff and they look Kind of They got little symbols on them. They're little stones and I got these little cheap cheap cards That I got at this hippie store down by the shoreline And then I pulled three different um From three different tarot decks one card for the past and the present the future It totally lines up with what we've been talking about so if we're looking at the past The first runes I got um is called I'm going to probably butcher the pronunciation because I don't speak viking But we have Thoris says And this is about reactive force directed force of destruction and defense conflict Instinctual will vital esotericism regenerative catalyst Tendency toward change. So this is like that Taking down the matrix kind of energy. This is the past or present. This is past. Yes. Okay. This is past energy. Okay Um, so this is this is like breaking free of illusions and breaking free of the matrix type of system I'm talking for those who are watching this. Obviously. There's people that have not gotten into this energy just yet um Followed by i'm going to show you guys the tarot cards. I got we got the hanged man um followed by The five of pentacles Followed by the night of wands. So it's like that stuck energy very It's uncomfortable stuck energy. It's um an energy where We don't like what's happening because nothing's happening. Nothing's moving We also might be kind of angry at times with this night of wands impulsive and um just It's it's it's a stuck energy. Okay then if we're moving into The now we have this this room, which is actually my favorite room. It's about birth general fertility Both mental physical and personal growth liberation regenerative power and light of spring renewal Promise of new beginnings and growth. So this is about us growing into Our soul growth in other words rebirthing ourselves I'm going on a brand new trajectory in our lives Uh getting acclimated with Change because we've been experiencing so so much of this stuck energy And everything like that. So this is like forward movement And this was followed by the eight of pentacles The ten of cups in the magician card So what this is saying is it is very vital and important to be working on yourself with the eight of pentacles It's also vital to really uh pay attention and be there for your family members that need you This is this is about having compassion like we were just talking about working on yourself And a lot of change is being made um on yourself. So this is kind of like more about personal growth here And then if we're going into the future We have T was I think is how you pronounce it. This is about justice leadership and authority analysis rationality knowing where your strength is um And honor So it's like I look at it more like justice system kind of thing like um Things are going to start to balance Right. We have that libra and mercury and libra energy, right coming forward and then we have followed by the date of cups Christ's favorite card ace of cups And the six of swords this is forward moment momentum This is walking away from the old walking toward the new new beginnings Also, this energy looks like um, there could be also some travel involved. So maybe relocations um So this is all the future energy, but it's also forward movement. It's not staying stuck It's moving forward with the new is kind of what that energy is Looking like there. So any questions about any of that? Sounds good to me. I like that ace of cups. I'll I'll take ace of cups any day. Yeah, we know Now we know It's because that that's the future that I'm happy about that. He's like, let me go to venus, please I'm supposed to be venus. I'm supposed to be venus. Um, I'm gonna have knowledge too guys I have gotten a bunch of your emails because I asked for emails last time and I've responded to some of you But next time, um, I know we're probably gonna do another part three on this because I've got a lot of questions about Some stuff. Um, I've got some questions about diet We've talked about that before but we'll get into that in the next Video and how that energy works and stuff like that. I know bundas will talk more about that as well So, uh, I know we're over an hour now. So again, if you do have more questions, um, you can email me at soterekatlanta gmail.com and um Maybe next week ladies we can convene again Three musketeers musketeers absolutely. No, I think it's important. We address questions and comments and stuff like that regarding this because I think, you know, we can convey the message But everyone learns differently. I know I always learned a lot differently than other people So, you know, if we can, you know, go into the information a little bit deeper so that people do truly understand and understand What exactly we're trying to present here so they can you know, um Better themselves and and I don't want to say better themselves because it's like Like emmy you said where you are is where you need to be but you know doing that shadow work and um And i'm going on a rant here. So I apologize But that's okay. Well, I do want to say before we sign off guys. Um, as far as diets, uh, do not, um Just wait for our episode before you make a drastic change in your diet There's not a one-size-fits-all when it comes to diet. So if someone's telling you to be like a fruitarian That's really dangerous. Um, I am vata. I could never do that So, um, we'll talk about that in the next episode. So if you do have questions about the dosha's and the different dispositions of energy Just email me and we'll cover that in the next episode But as I always say just find an ayurvedic doctor or specialist to help you with that kind of stuff Too, but we'll go over the basics of that in the next episode We'll also talk about the bundas again and some other stuff having to do with the energetic body And what's actually happening because this is something that we've been deprived of in the western world for many generations And it's time that we bring it back because this is the original science So, um, and it'll help you understand yourself better as well. So, um, all right ladies We'll talk to y'all I can't we're gonna have like a four-hour episode one day Maybe we could do a live one time and have people come I like that I have to figure out how to simulcast Maybe I can figure it out. Maybe I might have someone that can help me here at the house Oh, that would work. You can do your channel Yeah, yeah, no my husband knows how to handle this This stuff whatever this is technology and everything like that and I know he'll be willing to help out So, okay, cool. Yeah, if we could do a live then we can do like a q&a kind of a thing Perfect. Yeah, so I guess if anybody wants us to do a q&a, I mean It would you would be the only one that could see the questions With your oh, that's that's okay. I don't care. Cool Awesome ladies. Well, let us know. We'll talk to y'all soon. Okay. Bye. Bye