 Welcome everybody. Today, we will be sharing a new series that is Dynamics of Relationship. The relationship with Beyond Law CLC has touched its new heights. Though the today's session with S. Sushila, a senior advocate from Granada High Court, is on perspectives of dynamics of relationships. More emphasis would be on the purposes of how the marriages etc evolve. What are the expectations from the relationship? And it will be into series of episodes which are short and fresh and to the point. The first part today which we are starting would be on the expectations of marriage. Over to you Sushila ma'am and thank you for accepting our invite to start this new series of Dynamics of Relationship. I am really indebted to this Beyond Law CLC team members. You have been doing human service. One thing that I would like to request you is that as the very title of your series says Beyond Law, let us expand the horizon is what I am just requesting you. The objective behind this is to make people understand various dynamics of relationship number one. Number two is to help people handle their marriages in a better way, respect their spouses and respect the value of marriage as a system. These are the primary objectives. My intention is to take it part by part so that we deal with different aspects related to dynamics of relationship. Today, let us talk about expectations from marriage. One thing that we have to understand here is that marriage is not just an event. It is a commitment. It is a commitment for lifetime. When we say commitment, it will be very difficult to stay committed to an individual who had never been in our life earlier to marriage. Maybe we know that person as a friend or as a relative or as our classmate, whatever it may be. But post marriage, what we see in that individual will be entirely different. Maybe you are married to your childhood friend. You would have lived with that person for about, I mean, you would have known that person for the past 10 or 15 years or 20 years or 25 years. Still post marriage, what you see in that individual will be entirely different. That's where the troubles start. One thing that we need to understand is we should know our limitations. It's not bad to have expectations from our partner or from our spouses. I will have some expectations from my partner, so also he will also have some expectations from me. But there has to be some limitations. Our expectations cannot be compelled on our partner. I want my partner to talk like this, to dress up like this, to speak to my people like this, but not to speak like this to my partner. So many expectations I may have, but am I entitled to have those expectations is another thing that question we need to put to ourselves. One thing I always request people who come to me asking for some help is that how do you know your expectations. If the other partner agrees, there is absolutely no issue. I would like to go by my partner's expectations. I would like to respect my partner's expectations fair enough, but there will always be some limitations. What are your expectations is some one question that you have to put to yourself. In each and every aspect of day to day's life, if I say that my partner has to fulfill my expectations, then probably my partner will lose his or her individual identity itself. Nobody will be prepared to lose one's identity. In the initial stages of marriage, maybe due to some compulsions or maybe to please the other, please the partner, we may agree to so many expectations from our partner or from our spouse, but this will never continue for long. Please understand, relationships can never be compelled. Likewise, as we go on continuing our relationship, if I expect my partner to do everything as I like, it's better I put this question to myself. Should I have married myself when I want an individual to do everything as I like, it is like I'm expecting a clone to be there. This is not going to happen. How do you express your expectations to your partner is also very important. Assuming for a while you have some genuine expectations from your spouse, you can definitely speak to her or speak to him about your expectations and tell look, these are my genuine expectations. How do you feel about it? If the other side agrees, fair enough. If the other side doesn't agree, that should not be a ground for you to get agitated and start fighting with your spouse is what I'm requesting you to consider. Expectations are going beyond limits in many cases. A should not speak to be. A should speak only to see. A should not spend like this. In every walk of your life, if you start expressing your expectations, you need to understand what about the expectations of the other partner also. In a marriage, as I said earlier, marriage is a commitment for life. So there will be some genuine expectations. Those expectations need to be exchanged or informed to the other partner and then see to it that those expectations are met. Wonderful. If you see to it that those expectations are met, it's really beautiful. But where the expectations are not met, you need to find reasons as to why the expectations are not being met. But one thing that I need to understand, we need to understand here is that are we compelling the other party or the other person, our partner to always adhere to our expectations. This right we do not have. Marriage is not a master and servant relationship. You cannot compel your partner to do what you are expecting him to do. If they do it, fair enough. Beautiful. If they do not do it, you cannot find fault with the other person because A has not lived up to your expectations. I generally ask people, what are your expectations means? They say A, B, C, D, E, F, these things must be done by her or these things must be done by him. Why should they do it? For this, they will have no answer. This is what is expected from a relationship is what they say. Absolutely no. The answer is clearly unknown. What are your basic expectations? Love, care, respect, if your basic expectations are these three aspects, definitely yes. In all relationships, love, care and respect are fundamental expectations. These expectations, we do not call them as expectations. These are basically needs in any relationship, fundamentals of any relationship. Marital relationship is not an exception to this. So, if there is something lacking in these three areas, love, care and respect, definitely you can discuss about this with your partner. And if the partner is not agreeable on these three areas, definitely you can express your grievances, but not otherwise. I request you all to take a kind call on this aspect and see how you can control yourself so that you do not impose your expectations on your partner. Thank you all.