 Well, hello and welcome to understand men now. I'm Jonathan assay of Jonathan assay calm And I'm so excited to be shooting this short video for you today our topic do this For men to know your feelings you have to do this if you want men to know your feelings Really quickly if you're new to my youtube channel, please hit the subscribe button hit the bell so you can be notified of new content I shoot about three or four videos per week and obviously this is my holiday Edition one because I'm wearing my ugly Christmas sweater with all off on it. Can you see it? Can you see it? Let me know if you can see it All right, we're gonna talk about this one thing you have to do for men to get to know your feelings so What's interesting is I was having a conversation with my best friend the other day and he's in a relationship We're just talking about One of the differences between men and women and one of the things that women seem to do is And and this is a judgment But this feels like such a reality to us men is that you expect us to read your mind To read your mind like we can read your mind like we know what you're feeling. There's this grand Expectation I think my friend Allison Armstrong says that women kind of have an expectation of having hairy versions of themselves in other words that we always know what you're feeling We're hairier in that we most likely have hair on our back making the The analogy to hairy men, you know hairy versions of themselves, but here's the reality is is we can't read your minds We don't know what you're thinking. I'm feeling This is why I'm such a big proponent of leaning in leaning in By expressing yourself by sharing your truth By sharing your truth one of the chapters in my book Self-love the book or self love what the heck a self-love anyway It's self-love the book calm chapter one is speak your truth do it with kindness Lean in and start sharing your feelings and then there's another chapter in my book called if it's sincere And from the heart you can never say the wrong thing to the right person So it's don't hear it's time to stop expecting us to read your mind and start sharing About yourself because that's the only way we're gonna get to know you and if we genuinely care about you We're not gonna run away Your greatest fear is that we're going to leave you because you share your feelings But guess what if you've shared your feelings and we've run away then we're not the right guy for you Now I want to introduce you to a new book today I haven't talked about this book and this is for you seasoned personal development Self-help and spiritual people. This is for to see this is advanced, you know 4.0 level Shifting into your sovereignty your self-worth your self-love so you can actually start doing the things that I keep talking about in video after video after video and This book is called grounded spirituality by Jeff Brown grounded spirituality by Jeff Brown Look at how thick this one is this is master level stuff In fact, I highly recommend getting the book and listening to the audio at the same time. That's what I did This is 20 30 hours of intense work but if you want to be able to learn how to shift from that fear of not being able to express yourself and Start shifting into a heart-centered space of love then I highly recommend You do the inner work and there's some deep stuff that needs to be done to get to this place because one of the hardest things I've noticed from women is you either vomit your feelings or vomit your Expectations of us instead of actually describing your feelings in a healthy way This is why I've talked about this book in the last couple videos Read the book nonviolent communication by Marshall Rosenberg. It should have been called compassionate communication But this will help you. I'm giving you some really great resources I'm not here to sell you on some $5,000 five-year program where you're watching a bunch of videos of mine. No, I want you to do the work yourself So you can build from the inside out So when you're ready for a juicy delicious relationship you can reach out to me and I will specifically work with You on finding out of any of your blind spots and teaching you how to vet men Teaching you how to vet men. That's my area of expertise. Check out the link to a free discovery call If you want to learn how to vet for emotionally mature men I'm gonna pause for a second because I can see a picture of my son Connor in this video It's the holidays for those who've been following me know I lost my my son Connor right there That's him there and that's him there I lost him two years ago to an accident and the holidays fucking suck. It sucks without him He'd love this shirt. It's part of the reason why I'm wearing this. I lost my mom That's picture of my mom and dad. I lost her right before the previous year This really sucks the holidays and maybe it sucks for you, too And that's why I just want to give you a big gigantic hug right now I'm asking you for a hug right now. I could really use hugs because this is a tough time for me But I want you know, I'm here to serve you. I'm here to To shift perspective. I'm here to be a wake-up call. I'm such a Huge proponent of being the wake-up call to shift because I'm not here to blow smoke up your ass If you follow my work, you know, I curse. I'm passionate I yell and I scream Maybe some of it is because I'm angry, too I'm angry that I lost my oh my now. I'm gonna cry. I lost him But I'm also here to be passionately wanting to help and be a be of service If I'm making a difference in your life, please post a comment below I'd like to hear if this is resonating with you if you have a question if you want support Please post I read all of them or at least I do my best to read all of them Because I would like to see people beginning to live healthy happier relationships because as Esther Perel says The quality of our life is a reflection of the quality of our relationships And I want you and everyone to begin to have juicy delicious Relationship that nurtures are your soul your spirit your inner child and my hope is that's helping check out these books I recommend there's a link to Jonathan recommends books as well Thank you for all the support you've given me and so many of you have written me about my son I am so grateful. I know many of you have lost children yourself. You've lost a special someone This is a tough time for everybody and we could all just do the most compassionate thing And if we can either give a physical hug or a virtual hug because that will make a difference It really does send a prayer for everyone Send light and love out to the universe because we can all use way more love and that's my invitation for you I'm gonna wrap up this video as I always do first off give myself a big gigantic Jonathan bear hug of self love I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love and as I said before Let's all embrace each other with love because love is how we're gonna get through this time and even have a better tomorrow I want to thank you so much and wishing you a super duper wonderful fantastic day Bye-bye now