 You should just man up. We don't need a DNA test. From finding love in the eyes of your hairdresser, to also finding out why they are great listeners. They've heard and seen it all, but what if it's not just the hair that gets entangled? And you end up with being betrayed in the most brutal way. So goes the story of Luis and Benita, and it will blow your mind. It might even restructure your DNA. Before we start, let's make a deal. If I can make you smile once during this horrible story, you must smack that like button. Warning, the following story could be upsetting to paternity lying, baby mamas. I've just worked through a terribly difficult life situation, and instead of feeling relieved, reality has set in. And I feel sad and melancholy. So I decided to make this post for therapy. This is about me and my ex-girlfriend. Let's call her Benita and me Luis. We started dating a little over two and a half years ago. We connected while she was cutting my hair. She's a 26-year-old successful cosmetologist. She has her own chair and sink she rents at one of these beauty shop hotels, along with other independent cosmetologists. I am the operations manager and head designer for a landscape company. I've been working there since I was 16, I'm 27 now, and love my job and my boss. The company was struggling and had lost many of its customers and employees. So at age 19, my boss asked me to step into the crew manager position. I quickly rebuilt our team and started recruiting new businesses, for which I was paid a finder's fee. Today, our company is four times what it was when I took over. I've done so well that the owner has given me 25% equity and 25% operational ownership in the business, which means I share in profits and would share in the sale of the business, to which I have first rights if I want to buy it. He felt that without me, the company would have gone out of business within that one year. Back to Benita. Benita and I clicked because she was a small, independent business owner, is a hard worker and was very level-headed. She was also a saver and quite frugal. She was not the typical girl I dated up to this point, as though she was very pretty. She has a thick build, definitely not fat, but thick. I have nothing against women who are thick. I just had never dated one before. Regardless, we soon became very fond of each other. Up front, I told Benita that I was not looking for anything serious now since I was focused on building my business. I also explained I didn't believe in marriage anymore because of the divorce rate and the way men are treated in court. However, I did say that I'd like to find a nice woman to build a life and family with. She said her thoughts on life were very similar to mine, but she still believes in marriage with the right person, as it is something our community and our religion strongly believes in. We are both Hispanic Americans and a Catholic attending the same parish. Benita's family is from the state of Veracruz in eastern Mexico and my family is from Sonora in western Mexico. Her grandparents migrated to the US while my parents came here. Our families knew each other socially and made small talk at church events and community festivals and the like, but were not close friends or have any other connections prior to our relationship. Initially, we saw each other one day a week. That quickly went to two days a week and for the last five months of our relationship, we were spending four to five nights a week together before the discovery. We both decided it was important to have some apart time to concentrate on our businesses, friends, and to keep the longing between us. If I had to describe our relationship in a word, it would be happy. We connected mentally, physically, and had very similar personalities. We just enjoyed each other. Benita lived in a two-bedroom apartment with Katrina, who was also a cosmetologist at the same shop. I was not crazy about Benita rooming with Katrina, as Katrina likes to party and go out to the bars and the nightclubs and the after-hours places. Benita, on the other hand, is a social drinker or doesn't drink at all and doesn't go out to the bars or the clubs. Katrina had also cut my hair once before I got to know Benita. She even had pursued me, but she just wasn't my type of woman, as I don't like the drinkers and clubbers. I was afraid her habits were going to rub off on Benita, but thankfully they never did. Over time, their friendship started becoming lost and they were no longer enjoying living together, but Katrina moved out six months ago. She also moved her business to a different shop. To be honest, I was relieved and Benita was OK handling the rent and appreciated having the apartment to herself. I live in a converted commercial building on the back of my parents' property. When my dad bought his first house, he wanted to get as much acreage as he could to plant vegetables and fruit trees. Homes in our neighbourhood were cheap back then, in fact. Some you could get for under $40,000. My dad bought our house and the four empty lots, two on each side, where homes were torn down for less than $50,000. So we have a huge property and our backyard is massive. The property on the street behind our house belonged to a utility company which no longer used it. The property had an old brick building that was built super solid nearly 100 years ago, as it had to handle heavy weight loads. The utility company vacated the land and building and my dad bought it cheap. He gave me the building and land and I have turned it into an open floor plan with a loft and an internal garage. It's the coolest building in our neighbourhood of the city. Also, the landscaping on our entire property is top-notch, as of course that is my passion. Our neighbourhood has since gentrified, so our homes are worth many, many, many times what my dad initially paid for them. Sorry for the rambling, but I'm very proud of my dad and my mom for their accomplishments. Last September, my dad, brother and one of my cousins headed down to the Hermosillo area to spend time with my grandparents. They planned to do some repairs on their house and visit with our extended family on my dad's side, all of whom live in that area. We had this trip planned for over a year and each of us scheduled vacation time with our companies. While I was excited to go, I dreaded leaving my bonita for that long so we decided to talk, text and FaceTime every day to not be so lonely while being away from each other. The trip was awesome and the time flew by. When I got back, Bonita and I picked up where we left off. Our connection continued to grow and our relationship was very strong to where I started rethinking my stance on marriage. Several weeks after returning from the trip, I noticed Bonita seemed to be more full in the body than normal and her face seemed to be flushed. I didn't mind these things as they made her even more beautiful to me. When we were together physically though, she would become very hot or overheated, something that never had happened before. Also, she was way more proactive in needing affection from me and wanting to be together physically. A couple of weeks later, Bonita came to me and stated she had taken two tests that confirmed she was pregnant with my baby. I was surprised as I had always worn protection and was very careful putting them on and throwing them out and making sure we had no full body contact unless I was wearing one. I was happy about being a father and being Bonita's life partner but wanted this to occur at the appropriate time. I reacted in such a way because she had a folder with her that had a bunch of articles she printed out. Different studies indicating that condoms were not full proof with the failures ranging from 2% to as high as 7% or 8% in some of the articles. She knew me well as I think she did this as she knew I would question this. After this conversation, it dawned on me. This was not what I planned but sometimes life doesn't go as planned. We spent the rest of the night talking and the next day I told my parents. My mom was disappointed learning we were using protection. Sounds strange but she wasn't happy about the part of us having primarital activities. When it cooled a bit she seemed to be happy about having a grandchild. She told me I should marry to make things right. My dad was understanding but asked me if I was happy with this news directly. I told him the truth that yes I was just not planned. I then went with Bonita to tell her parents and they both reacted very similar to my parents. They too started quizzing about marriage. Bonita then put out an announcement to her 5,000 plus friends and followers on Insta about our news and quickly got over 2,000 likes. She has connections with most of the people in our parish, our community, as well as other people she's met at her beauty shop. Things for us were great and we grew closer, spending more and more time together as we prepared for the little one. We continued to live separately but we were soon planning to move Bonita to my home prior to birth and then just pay the rest of the three months left on her lease. That was the plan. But then it happened. Out of the blue, Katrina shows up. She shows up at my place of business and asks if I could talk to her as she had something important to tell me. She said she believes Bonita cheated on me when I was in her mercilio and her baby may not be mine. Knowing that Katrina and Bonita were now frenemies I initially took what she was saying with a grain of salt. It felt more like an insult but I didn't show her I took it as such. She continued by explaining that two brothers came to the shop one late one afternoon for haircuts. Katrina said that she washed and cut the hair of one brother, let's call him Chris, while Bonita gave the same treatment to the other brother, let's call him Nick. They were from Greece and had been here for three weeks helping their uncle and aunt with their new Greek restaurant that opened late last year. It was a Friday and they were scheduled to return to Greece to start. Katrina said since it was late the brothers invited Bonita and her to a free meal at their uncle's restaurant which they accepted since it was dinner time and they hadn't eaten lunch and were starving. She said they drove separately and when they got to the restaurant the entire family greeted them warmly and told them to order whatever they liked their treat. Katrina said they were a great family and the restaurant looked pristine and delicious. She said after the meal they were all chatting in a bar area when she started talking with Chris about the waterfront and how that was something he wanted to see before he left. She told him she could take him there. She asked Bonita and other family members if they wanted to go but the family said they couldn't because they were busy at the restaurant and Bonita said she was going to stay and chat a little more with the family for about an hour and 15 minutes and she dropped him off around 9pm when the restaurant was closing. The parking lot was empty and Bonita's car was gone so she didn't think anything weird. The next morning at the beauty shop she and Bonita briefly discussed how good the food was and how nice the family was and that was it. As mentioned they were frenemies already at this point so this was rare that they were talking about a subject on common ground. A couple weeks later Katrina moved her business to another beauty shop. Now, here's where the wow moment happens. Katrina said she was out recently with several women at where else, a bar. She said the girls had a couple of drinks in them and started gossiping and one suggested they have a best and biggest discussion. This apparently is where each woman says the name of the man who was their best and the name of the man who was their biggest lover. I didn't know this was a thing women talked about but was questioning Katrina why she was telling me all this when Bonita wasn't even there. She said one of Bonita's cousins was at the event. Let's call her Patricia. Patricia is still good friends with Katrina. She said after they went around the table and were giggling and laughing about their answers Patricia said wasn't Bonita has us all beat in the biggest category. She said Bonita told her she was once with some Hulk guy from Greece years ago that had a double digit unit. She went on to say that Bonita said he was dumber than rocks but had the body of a statue. She claimed he was so unique that she invited him back a second night to experience it one more time. Then ghosted the poor guy. She said he was a broke busboy worker and since he lived in another country ditching him wasn't difficult. I was hurt and concerned hearing this but still was not sure why Katrina was telling me something about Bonita. That happened years ago. Katrina said Louise don't you see this didn't happen years ago this happened when you were in Hermoscio and that man was Nick. She said Nick is six foot three and is built like Hercules but he's no Socrates. Katrina then said the rest of the people in the group including Patricia didn't know about the dinner she and Bonita had with the brothers so she just laughed and played along but knew she had to tell me this news as I should know. She said that Patricia told the group that Bonita did say no one could compare to her Louise me and that I was by far her best lover and her forever love. By this point I had heard enough and thanked Katrina for letting me know. Honestly in my mind I still thought she was lying just trying to sabotage our relationship out of jealousy. Before leaving she gave me the phone number of Chris and said call him I'm sure his brother Nick told him all about his times with Bonita. That night I went over to Bonita's and we shared a nice evening like we normally do but the conversation with Katrina was burning my brain. I did not mention anything to Bonita as I didn't want to cause turmoil if this was all a big lie. The next morning curiosity got the best of me so I called the phone number of the brother but the call erred out. Either the number was disconnected or I didn't dial right or something. As the morning went on my head was buzzing with the information I got last night so I decided to go the Greek restaurant for a half-past one and thought I might be able to talk with the uncle and even explain my situation. I went to the restaurant and the food was great. I was finishing up my meal when the uncle came over to my table and thanked me for praising their establishment. He then said I saw your truck and see you do landscaping. I said yes and he said he'd like to get an estimate on landscaping for the building. I finished my meal when we finished the walk around I told him I would come back with a detailed estimate. I then asked him if I could take off my business hat and ask him a personal question he said sure absolutely I asked are you the uncle of Chris and Nick? He said yes they are back in Greece now did you meet them while they were here? I said no but a friend of mine did and I wanted to get in touch with Nick to ask him a question. He asked me what the question was as he could relay the information to Nick. I said I'd like to ask him if he knows a woman named Benita. The uncle's face lit up and he said yes I know he knows Benita and he is very sweet to her. She was here for dinner one night with a friend and Nick and her had a couple of dates the weekend before he left. Ouch he said Nick thought they were in love but she has just ignored his calls and messages since he returned to Greece. Nick thought something might have happened to her of course it was gut wrenching to hear this information. The uncle then suggested we call Nick together and walked me back to his office this is where he speed dialed him on speakerphone before I even had a chance to explain further Nick quickly answered and said some things in Greek to his uncle and they had a back and forth conversation that I didn't understand. The uncle then said to me how do you know Benita and could you get a message to her for Nick. I said to them I don't want to ambush you with this information and I'm not mad at you I'm just sad now but Benita is my girlfriend. The uncle was very surprised and shock was on his face hearing this. He then started talking to Nick in Greek for several minutes and then slowly hung up the phone. He said I'm very sorry for this and so is Nick. He did not know you were married. I said to him we are not married but we have been a couple for over two years. I asked if Nick said anything to him about the relationship just now. He said no other than he didn't know about me was very sorry about this and he was upset that Benita didn't reveal this. He said Nick is heartbroken as he wanted to get into a serious relationship with her. I asked if Nick said they were intimate and the uncle hesitated and said I'd rather not say and then said I'm very sorry for you on behalf of Nick myself and my entire family that night I talked with Benita I told her I was at the Greek restaurant and asked if she'd been there she was surprised and said no was it good I said yes and said that I ran into Katrina and she said you and her went there for a free meal Benita said oh yes I remember we got a free meal we were doing a good job of washing and cutting the hair of the owner's relatives maybe I should have had more tactful but I just put it out on the table and said tell me about your relationship with Nick she said with who I told her Nick you know who I'm talking about did you have relations with him that weekend she said what are you talking about and was getting upset I said I spoke to Nick on the phone and he confessed everything you did that weekend she said he's lying we didn't do anything I just gave him a ride around town in my car after dinner what I said why didn't you tell about this before I don't believe you did you not tell people he was your biggest lover and I was your best lover she said no whoever told you that is lying to break us up from their jealousy I told Benita that based on this incident I want a DNA test done on the baby she quickly agreed at first so I said ok I'll make the appointment first thing tomorrow she then said no no I'm not doing anything before our baby is born but I'll do the test after birth I agreed as I didn't want to upset her but admit to her that our relationship is going to be under strain until then because of this and that we would not be moving in together she cried so I told her I would be there to support her through her pregnancy no matter what she kept saying everyone is lying why don't you believe me I love you more than anything and would never do something to hurt you like that I swear the next day Benita made a post to Insta saying troublemakers were trying to break up our relationship and it has given Louise cold feet about being a father she asked for prayers and got over 1,700 likes when I found out about this posting I asked her to take it down as it was not truthful and she deleted it later that night Katrina made a post stating that no one is causing trouble for Benita that she did it herself and she is not giving Louise the truth about their relationship and the baby this post got a bunch of drama comments and angry emojis replies when I found out about this post I asked Katrina to delete the post and she did but word was already circulating throughout the community that Benita cheated on me and the baby might not be mine from that point until the birth our relationship was strained and distant I continued to support her like I promised and actually bought her over $1,400 worth of things for the baby like bassinets controllers, tubs and the like the baby was born and I was at the hospital and held the baby he was beautiful and I teared up as I was walking past the nursery station on my way out the head nurse said she had the birth certificate here for me to sign as the father I discreetly advised the nurse that I would be signing after we completed DNA testing she was surprised and apologized profusely stating Benita told her to go ahead and type on the certificate above the father's signature she said she would amend the document immediately Benita refused to get DNA testing at the hospital and said don't you love your baby he's yours you can see it in his face and features he loves you and I love you more than anything don't make me get that test and break our trust and ruin our family I told Benita I needed to have certainty but she didn't budge that night she posted a picture of her and the baby to insta with a shirt on the baby that said daddy's boy she had a caption saying daddy loves me but has cold feet about being a parent please pray for us the post quickly got over 500 responses before I saw it and called her to take it down again which she did my boss suggested I take her to court to get the court to order a paternity test he connected me to an attorney we talked and he started the process I didn't want to resort to this but Benita gave me no choice in court the judge asked why we were asking for this and my attorney stated that I wanted to have custodial rights to the child if it was indeed mine Benita was in court without an attorney and said she would voluntarily give me 50-50 custodial rights of the child without a proceeding or test of course she would that would be ridiculous the judge asked my attorney is there a question as to the paternity here and my attorney answered yes your honor and we can provide witnesses to testify to that fact the judge then rendered judgment and requested the paternity test and said that she really hoped everything worked out for both of us because that baby should have a loving mother and father then Benita gave her baby my first name and for the baby's middle name she gave my middle name hyphenated with my last name retaining her maiden name as the baby's last name so now the baby carries my full name how confusing will this be for him well the date for testing came and went and Benita didn't show so we had to go back to court and this time the judge ordered her to take the test or she could be held in contempt so the date of the test came and this time she showed up the test results came back I am not the father I already knew this deep in my heart I thought finally getting this all resolved would give me relief but I instead feel a deep dark depression like I've never felt before I've lost my love and a baby I wished were mine some in our parish and community are saying be a man and just step up and marry her and be a father to that little boy I wish I could be a better man and do that but I just can't our priest actually had approached me for a private talk when we met he told me a bible story of a man I believe his name was Jacob or Joshua who went off to battle and when he returned years later his wife had given birth to another man's child as she thought he was not going to come back our priest said instead of being angry he professed his love for his wife and took responsibility for the baby and they lived a wonderful happy life he said he wanted to tell me the story to show that relationships like this can work but he would respect any decision I made I told him the man from the bible was a good brave man something like that as my situation was different and I could never trust my Benita again for what she has done our priest said he understood in spite of the truth coming out Benita continues to make posts on insta posts of her and the baby referencing me the latest had the baby in a one piece outfit with the abbreviation junior meaning he was my junior however since the truth has come out about me not being the father few people other than some of her family members and closest friends are responding to the posts I think like me people are concerned about her mental health I've since had another discussion with Nick via his uncle and told him about the paternity test and that he was likely the father he said he's tried getting in touch with Benita but she has now blocked him he's going to come back over next month for three weeks and will try to meet with her he'd like to be a good father to the boy and would like to relocate to the USA I told him before jumping ahead he should first get a DNA test he said he has been in touch with an attorney in Greece who said there is little he can do as Benita is an American citizen Nick is going to speak with an attorney when he gets here I do hope Benita comes to her senses and gives Nick a chance to be a good father and even help him become a citizen he seems like a good man and he has a good family I wish nothing but the best for Benita her son and for Nick to give the baby Luis a good start I bought $1,000 worth of Bitcoin with PayPal and deposited another $1,000 into a savings account through PayPal as a birth present I know I shouldn't have done this but it made me feel good with my prosperity finally I took Katrina out to lunch and thanked her for telling me about Benita's affair while I don't like Katrina's ways I will forever be grateful to that woman for all of my life if she didn't tell me I would be living a lie thank you for staying here for the full story God's blessings to everyone that brings us to the end of Luis's story while he might not receive any free haircuts anymore at least his future is free of knots and entanglements how did you experience this story? did your neck hairs raise when Benita was willing to let Luis live a lie or do you side with the people telling Luis to as they say it man up let us know down below before you go let me drop a request in your lab next time you go to the hairdresser get a trim not a life story that could ruin you wait wait did you just think I forgot about our deal well if I did make you smile be sure to smack that like button into oblivion see you in the next one