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Beginning the story proper, we find lots of boring exposition, much of which we've already heard in the Author's note. Also, Jen clearly has no idea how medieval society worked: royalty did not just "make friends with" traveling merchants.
Sauces:
The Beatles, "Paperback Writer"
Zelda - The Wand of Gamelon
The Adventures of Sonic the Hedgehog
The Eighties Matchbox B-Line Disaster, "In the Garden"
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