Nothing Could be Finer...

Nothing Could be Finer, written by Leo & Gem, is a musical romp through the manufacturing wasteland of China, starring an endless array of cheap products and environmental disasters.

Here's the lyrics:

Nothing could be finer than to buy my stuff from China at the Wal-Mart.
Nothing could be sweeter than a melamine burrita at the Wal-Mart.

Toys that are lead painted sold in every store.
Even the shrimp are tainted, so cheap I'll buy some more.

Feeding my dog Curly, I awakened much too early. I was yawning.
Oh, my God, into his cup, I put some dog food, now my pup...I'm mourning.

If I had Aladdin's lamp for only a day, I'd make a wish and here's what I'd say

Nothing could be finer, save a nickel or a dimer at the Wal-Mart.
Nothing could be finer than to be Mattel's designers, oh, they're so smart.
Nothing could be sweeter than a worker working cheaper. that's the best part.

Brush your teeth with toothpaste, give it a good squeeze.
You may find out that it's laced with the best antifreeze.

Beijing summer athletes, sprinting in Olympic track meets will be crawling...
Blackened sputum sputters up, while all the runners' throats close up, appalling.

If I bought Aladdin's lamp from China today, and rubbed too hard, I'd end up flambé.

Stop that ocean liner that is bringing crap from China. That's my warning.

• Category

  • News & Politics

• License

  • Standard YouTube License