 Everything happens for a reason. I can't believe I'm making this video. I really can't. This is, this is the hardest video I've ever made. I can sit and talk about mental health at home and then it comes to physical health and dangerous shit with my physical health. And I worry, I literally, what the footage about seeing just happened. Hey guys, so I filmed that video yesterday. Well, early hours this morning but yesterday. I couldn't make a video last night talking about this because I was both emotional and I didn't know how to deal with it. I didn't know what I was dealing with. I've had time today to truly get into what I'm dealing with and to research the things that I needed to know about last night. And I'm just going to address it now. Lydia, why was you in A&A? To start with, I first filmed one on one after I had collapsed five times, like full on blacked out five times. I had no idea what happened. I came out of it and I was on the floor and I was like, fuck. It happened five times and I was like, I'm going to call for advice, I don't know what to do. And then during the initial assessment she was like, I'm sending a paramedic round to check on you. I was like, why? She was like, the sightings that you're showing are both of a heart attack or a stroke and I was like, fuck. Yeah, I had to test them. My blood pressure was low, my sugar level was low, heart rate was fast, and it dropped. And when I say dropped, they did the 12 litre ECG and it went from high to low in the one scan and no one theoretically can do that without there being something wrong. And he was like, he turned around and he was like, we're going to have to go to A&A. I was like, I'm not going to argue with you. I was like, I don't want to risk anything. With mental health, I see it differently. With my mental health, I know what I'm doing with that. With physical health, I don't have a flu. And I do want to make that clear. When it comes down to mental health, I know what's best for me. Physical health, I haven't got a clue. So we went to A&A and I got there and the first thing they did was blood pressure. It was very low, very low, so they made me sit down. They wouldn't let me stand up. Yesterday was hard. Yesterday was really, really hard. And yeah, I don't know how to explain it. So I had loads of tests done. I had ECGs done. My blood pressure was checked every 15 minutes. My heart rate was constantly being jacked. And yeah. So my heart would pay slowed down to 53. And then to 40. And then to 39. It was terrifying because it was terrifying because it's a very real thing. And I'm terrified of my physical health or something to do with my heart going wrong. It scares me. So moving on a bit to after the heart rate thing came to average, it was, what was it? I wrote it down and I know I missed things. It was 102. So it went, like saying my heart rate is traumatic. And that was what? Like the blackouts. I've been told to keep my sugar levels as high as I can. So I've literally got, I have to have sugar. And I wanted to stop having like the sugary drinks and stuff. But hey, I don't have a choice currently. So what's going on with me? I have two pathways for my heart. And I have mentioned this briefly before. One of them slowed down because of the low sugar level yesterday. And that's what caused the blackout. The only issue with this now is it could happen again. And yeah, I don't really know much more. I'm to those who would have had a deal with it. I'm not doing great about it. I don't know how to react about it. I feel very down. I feel low. But I'm also really happy because at least I am getting help for things. I'm happy because my life's going pretty good at the moment. But that one thing just tipped that entire evening. I went from making video to A&E. It's kind of ironic because I was, actually yesterday I was going to film a video about the time that I flatlined. Like I was filming on my phone because my camera was dead. Like literally I started to film a video yesterday afternoon about this flatlining experience I had. I filmed on my phone. I filmed part of it on my phone anyway. I don't know what to say. I'm in shock. That's all. So yeah. I don't know what to accept or want to take from here. I'm going to book a GP appointment next week and get that shit sorted because I need to. I'm just really tired today. I'm really tired. Oh don't cry Lydia. I cried a lot. I walked home and I was crying. I was like I don't know how to deal with this because I already have a lot of issues with my health. To have more added to that. A lot more serious. That's terrifying. I'm not saying I'm going to die of heart disease or anything. I'm not saying that. What I'm saying is the fact that it could dip again and cause blackouts again that scares me because of course it does. Who wouldn't that scare? So yeah. Thank you for watching. I don't normally put this part of my life online but my channel is for change. So let's do it. Thank you for watching. Completely unrelated though. I'm going to shame a super plug now. So I have merch. Merchlink is in the bio. Make sure you check it out. Make sure you share it with people. It's going to get improved. I'm not a designer at any level. My first edition book is only going to be available for two more weeks. So if you guys would like to take your hands on that then get it fast. My second book is going to replace it which is the first book in that but it's better. The first edition book is currently discounted to £3 something. I think it's £3.92 or something like that. It's discounted. So yeah. Please do that. I also have, if you guys are interested in Audible I do have a link which is in the description down below. We can get a 303 trial and you get a free Audible. What could be better than that? I also have all the links to all my equipment down below if you guys are interested in what I use to make all my videos or that's down below. Thank you guys for watching and if you guys would like to keep up to date with my life when I'm not posting videos you can follow me on Twitter which is Life of Lydia. I also have Instagram which is also Life of Lydia. Life of Lydia official. That's what it is. Thank you for watching. I love you all. Thank you for being a supported family.