 Check it, check it, check it, this is Unique Hustlers, your boy, E-CEO, and I'm here with the lovely official Miss Jamaica. Yeah, don't know, walk on. Wait a minute, hold up man, how's it going? Blast, blast. Say man, this here is a special kind of, this one right here, it touches my heart man, to be honest with you. When I met this guy, we linked up online man, and we became brothers at that point, to me, because of the way we had like spirits man. And to hear his story, the one that he's about to tell today, it pretty much, it's going to show you why. This guy here is special man, Alkevious, what's going on baby? Alkevious I'm strong. Yes sir, yes sir, let me get my own clap track please. Hey man, can y'all hear me so I'm strong man. I coulda gave you a clap. Hey don't play. Listen, we'll go back and add that. No. I got it right, y'all hit the button. You got all that? I got all that. Oh man. That's it. No, but I mean, you different man, Alkevious, you've came through a lot of obstacles, and a lot of the obstacles that you came through, what it took some out. It did. It did take some out. It did take many out. It did take many out. So the thing that tripped me out about your story is that you was able to overcome a lot of things that's, like I said, a lot of people didn't overcome. It was a struggle. It wasn't easy. You know, I'll be lying to you to say that, you know, I mean that the journey was perfect. It wasn't perfect. It was a lot of trials, it was a lot of hills, it was a lot of walls, it was a lot of obstacles. There were many times I said, forget it. There was times I did give up mentally, spiritually. I walked away from God, you know what I mean? Came back, walked away again, fell down on my back, fell down on my face. But you know, when you know there is something inside of you that God placed in you, no matter what you go through, you have to fulfill it. You know, you said something. You said you walked away from God, but really, you know, nothing can separate you from the love of God. Nothing, nothing. As it says in Romans, in Romans chapter 8 tells you that. You see what I'm saying? So no matter how you try to think in your heart, you can make these things up because the Bible says so is a man thinks in the heart, so is he. So if you put these things in your heart and articulate them that way, you can cause that schism. Kind of like, kind of like Jonah was doing when he was running, when he ran to Tarshish instead of going to Nine of the V. Right. And he said, I'm going to go this way. But then when he ran, God was in control of that situation too. You see what I'm saying? And the people around him will say, no, we're going to save him. He said, throw me over, throw me into the water. And he, and they wouldn't do it. And they decided they was going to go against God too, just like Jonah. And as they both went against God, the storm grew worse. And they couldn't understand that spiritually, God had something bigger in store that they couldn't fathom in their mind anyway of a big fish engulfing him. So a lot of times people try to make things right in their own power. But really, God is the one over in control of everything. I ain't nothing. What you think about that? Oh, no, what I was going to say is that when you bring that back around to, you know, what goes on in today's society, a lot of times we have friends who do things. And sometimes they go through things over and over again. And we try to help them, like say example, somebody who they have money, but they can't pay their rent because they keep shopping all the time or whatever. But they keep on doing stuff. And they be like, hey, you got somebody to help me, whatever. And you keep on bailing them out, keep on bailing them out, but they're not growing. They're not coming. Safety net. They keep coming. Right. So we are stopping them from going through what got into him for them to go through. The same thing what they were trying to do. They were trying to help him, but they're not realizing they're hurting him because God has a bigger picture, a bigger plan for you when you're going through situations. He wants you to rise above it and follow what he needs for you to do. Every process has a purpose. Every process. And what I didn't understand is that everything that I went through, experience from a molestation, from foster care, from abandonment, from abuse from my father, abuse from a mom and going through the system. I did not understand why me. Yeah, yeah, I didn't understand it. And and and honestly, I thought at a at a certain point in my life, it was something wrong with me. Yeah, like it was almost like you're cursed. And honestly, I can say that I felt that people looked at me that way, that I was a cursed kid, you know, because you would hear that that certain saying from certain adults who had kids that I play with in the neighborhood. Don't play with that little boy. Wow. You know, I heard that. And so it it mentally did something to me. But I felt like that maybe they feel like I'm not good enough. You know, families said certain things. Maybe he's not good enough. Maybe you know that that black sheep or that that one person in the family that, you know, people look at it as a problem. Be that it may that I was not a perfect kid. I'm not going to see him act like I was. I was still anything in front of you. And I mean, I did things. I was very devious. I was, but I always told people and actually that's my third book. We're getting to that. My third book is called uneducated and misunderstood. OK, and when you look at many of the trauma, the traumatic issues that we have in the black communities and a lot of these young men, there's a lot of things that we only looking at from a surface level that not understanding. There's a lot of deep rooted core things that these individuals have went through experience. So once you tap into that, then you can understand the behavior. And so that was me. I had attitudes I fought in every school. I got kicked out in every school. I did all these things. I was crying out for attention acting out. Yep. And that's crazy because that's that's a lot of our children, black children, that that because there was there was a lot of not being healed in our ancestry, where we went through things where we had to we had to move on and it hurt us and it affects us to this day. I really believe that, you know, because the broken homes, the broken, you know, in our community, that pretty much is a norm. It is normalized to where we don't have a lot of times of fathers or the mothers and just like that young boy that just left here and just like you and just like me, you go through this thing where at nine, you know, your family ripped apart because they can't make it happen. You know what I mean? And but at the end of the day, the only thing on this is my opinion. OK, is that at the end of the day, it's your decision to change because a lot of people always blame it on generational sin. Oh, my daddy, I didn't know. I didn't this. We're in a generation where social media is there. Internet is there. You can research anything. You can find positive role models out there of anybody. So you have no excuse. I've seen people who said I have a single father or a single mother. I went through all of these things and they turned out perfect. Good, not perfect. But it's still it's still a process. It's a process. You got to think about that. That you have both ends of it. You have the ones who turned out really bad and the ones that still turned out good. So you have so you have the choice. Yeah, I just think that it's a process because of the fact that even though you can even you can normalize, but there has to be some healing. Well, you know, you can you can fake it. You can normalize it. But we've we have not just young people, people in general. We have desensitized the whole experience of the things that we went through, meaning that we have suppressed it. So if if if if you have been molested by your uncle, you know, that pain is not even pain no more, but it shows in every relationship you have with a man, you know, we don't talk about that. Yeah, because we were told don't talk. That's not true. And you got to look at the effect. You know, my mom used to have many men in and out the house. My father used to have many women in and out the house. So how can me as a young man look up to someone how to treat a woman? Yeah, I don't. I don't know. I think having multiple women is a way you treat a woman. Vice versa. And it was a young lady seeing her mother and you're saying that. That's why you see so many young women have kids at a young age. Both of my sisters had kids at the age of 15. Wow. And, you know, when we look at all of these things. Yes, it is a choice. But what options do too many young black girls or boys have? Because with me, yes, there was another kid who probably went through similar situations that I went through. But what other options did he or she have? When I look at it, I didn't have lights. I didn't have running hot water. I knew how to cook dope and cut up dope at 12. My brother, who was serving 30 years right now, put me in a crack house and would sell dope for him. My mom at 12 will come to me and want to buy dope. You know, when you have all of these things happening, I don't have no other options. You can't you can't display to me what other path that you can take because this is the only path that's been shown to me. Yeah. And so when you look at little Tim Tim down the street, who father probably ran out of his life, it doesn't balance or level out compared to what he's going through. Because he don't have a father, a mother, support, none of that. So the only thing he has left is to defend in survival mode. So he's had to get it however he can. So but to your your statement is it is true. It is a choice. That's why I had to make a choice. Yeah. Like do I continue to hold on to the things that I went through in my past? Yeah. Or do I make something of it? Do I use my past as fuel to motivate me to be great? Or do I use it to keep me where I'm at? So it is a choice. Is it all it all boils down to a choice. Yeah. I'm molestation. Oh, man. That's exactly what I was thinking. You know, it's crazy. What happened and if you want to get in? Man, come on. This is what God said. Listen, no, sir. That's the only way you can get healing. So I'm healed. Yeah. So so what was here? Many men. No, no. We had another guy that just brought that up on that was supposed to come back on the show that he didn't come back. Right. Yeah. I don't hear that very often. Yeah. So so was it family member? Um, before before I was before I was 11, I was molested four times. Wow. Two by women and two by men. Wow. And one of the one of the females were was a relative. Wow. And the one that that I feel like, you know, and I love talking about it. Why do I love talking about it? Because my testimony is healing to somebody. That's what I know. You know, and so that's but I can't always tell people, you have to heal first. Yeah, you have to heal. Yeah. You know, and so when I hear other people giving a testimony and and they're struggling that in a teary eye and a crime, you're not healed yet. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. How long did it take you to heal? I want to say I was in my mid or maybe my late late twenties. Oh, so it took me some years. It took me some years. It took me years to forgive my mom. How did you finally heal? What was it that that when God gave when God gave me my calling? There it is. When he when he gave me my calling, everything you went through, it's going to be used for your greater good. And so from the molestation, from the abuse, but but everything that I went through, I told myself I would die with this. Like I can talk about when I was seven, I was molested every single night by a woman, every single night at seven years old. I can talk about where where a guy made me hold his penis in my hand. You know, I mean, I'm eight, nine years old. I don't know. But I know this ain't right. But I'm afraid. Yeah. You know, I mean, I can remember being fond of it by another guy. You know, I mean, and I can remember also going over relatives. I have some and they make me stick my hand down their pants. You know, but it is some sick people out there. Yeah. You know, I mean. And so, you know, I can talk about it because there's a lot of people refuse to talk about it and just going to internally deal with it. And so they're they're dying inside inside. They're dealing with their problems and the pain and it affects trust. Relationships, it trusts. I mean, it affects you in so many other ways spiritually. Yeah, it does. Because honestly, in order to become closer to God, you have to trust him. I've met so many women who have been molested and didn't come up straightforward, eventually, and told me that. But after a while of building trust, they did open up and tell me. And some of them either became gay because I was molested by a man so they don't want to be around man or some that are married now or and been molested. But they bring it over into their relationships. You know what I mean? Because it's over. Let go of certain things. You know what I mean? So how is it possible to truly heal, though? Because some people have told me that that's something that you will always, even when you're married, sometimes you don't want to be touched because it reminds you of what you've been through. Certain things do move on. You you really haven't moved on. And I've heard that. And as in today's society for women, not because you don't hear them and talk about it as much as this Me Too movement. So you think that a lot more people would be apt to come out and talk about it. But there's a lot of people who still don't want to know they're not. They're not going to talk about it because some of the people that molested them is people from their family. You know, some people that probably experience that, you know, I mean, in the answer to your question, we have to start understanding that therapy is important. A lot of people don't want therapy. They don't want to go through therapy. They don't want to sit down and talk to people about the things that they would do. Yeah, we do not believe in counseling, marriage, marriage counseling. Yeah, that's it. But when to sit down and talk about the things that we're dealing with, we don't want to do that. So I told I told somebody I was in Minnesota. I was speaking at this conference. They fly me out every year, twice a year. And a young lady asked me that. She asked me that. And I was telling them my story. And she was like, Ray rose her hand. She was like, did you ever do counseling or therapy? And I was like, at that, I didn't. But then I was had a reality check. Everyone's not strong like you. Right. Everyone probably can't overcome that. Like you overcame it. So you can't tell people just because you didn't do it that they shouldn't do it. I think it's a touching situation. Yeah. And the reason it's touching for me is because I believe in the power of God so much that the Holy Spirit is what comforts you. So I think that's the part where it becomes real, real, a real situation for me. And I've said this to you before because a lot of times we try to go to a counselor. Well, what does that council believe? You know, I believe through Christ, I'm healed. That's me. I can't tell nobody else. I went through a lot as a kid. But what cleansed me was when I went like it says in Second Corinthians, if any man be in Christ, he's a new creature. I believe that. And I think that's what caused me to change. And I know it did because it's been 30 years, 20 some years. I hadn't drank, smoked or nothing or more. Swap my life around. God took me and pulled me up by the fire. And I think that's something that has to be said. I don't think that a counselor unless he's the Bible says the Lord is your counselor. True. So I think that a lot of time, people don't put the time into that that they so busy trying to do it in a Protestant, you know, in a no, in a, in a, you know, a Protestant way. You know what I mean? Like in a way to where you were. Yeah. Yeah. Well, a way to where you think you're going to go to a church building, sit in a, sit over here and in a congregation and that's going to happen. It don't happen. No, it don't. It don't. It's a process where you have to read the Word of God and you have to really believe in God and give up everything that you ever thought was something so you can be rebuilt. But you know what? People don't have relationships with God. There you go. A true relationship. Because you have a lot of people who say that they love God and believe in God or that when it's convenient for them or that they even give up whatever they're going through to God. But then is a difference when you truly give up, when you truly devote yourself to God, because we're a flesh. So nobody is perfect. No one's perfect. No matter how much we say we we truly love him. We still on our phone all the time. We still find excuses why we be watching TV all the time instead of reading the Bible or, you know, we put a lot of things or prayer before God or prayer before him. And that's everybody. No matter who you are, you could be the person that is in, you know what I mean? Did you watch a video or something? I had because I just did a video about that. Literally, I just what you just said verbatim. I just said that we have to start carving out time every single day for God, not when it's convenient for us. You know, he had to he had to get me where he knew he had me in order for him to really get me to know what I need to do in my life. And that happened when I was in prison. I didn't grow up in church. I didn't have a religious background. I didn't have a grandmother who prayed for me. I didn't have a mom who prayed for me. I didn't have no one telling me to go to church on Sunday or Wednesday. I didn't. I had none of that. So when when I gave my life to Christ, did you know about God? Since nobody. Nothing. I mean, you know, I had that I had that relationship, that prison relationship, that jail relationship. So that was the only time you knew about God is when you were in. That's it. That's it. My brother was trying to get. Yeah, I didn't. And I tell people like when I hear people, I say you're a traditional Christian, you know, because you was brought up, you was raised. And so you're afraid to look at anything any different. You know, I went into this thing with with with nothing to gain, nothing to lose. I don't have nothing to offer you. And it wasn't I had so many brothers when I was in federal prison had so many brothers used to come to me. They saw something that I didn't see, but it was it's so amazing how so many people used to say they see something in me that I didn't see in myself. Yeah. And I just never saw when you say it's something. Well, you I didn't see what you saw. Well, you couldn't see the picture from being in the picture. Oh, come on, man. So hold on, hold on, hold on, rain. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. You couldn't see the picture from being in the picture. A lot of times you can't see it. But at the end of the day, your guilt will make room for you, room for you. And that's where a lot of people don't get it. Like I didn't I haven't sat down with all the greats. I'm not sitting here with all the majors, all the accolades and all the degrees. I don't have all of that. God said I will make the unqualified qualified. That's right. I make the unskilled skill. People say, man, I don't know, but I didn't choose this platform. I'm going to boss talk one on one. Real talk in Dallas, Texas. In Dallas, Texas. I'm from Charlotte. I'm from a small town. Yes, sir. With three felons and bending out the system. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You know what I mean? God said, listen, when you move, I move for you. You know what I mean? So everything that I feel like what I'm doing is all God. You know what I mean? I don't care what people look at. They can look at all the nice things. But listen, I don't take no credit before I give it to God. This is all God, man. Like when I try to kill that dude at 13, yeah. That was that 24 years of life could have happened. Could have happened. You know, when I try to kill that person at 19, OK, in broad daylight, that 35 years of life could have happened when I thought about suicide. Two attempts, it could have happened. Every robbery attempt that I did do, I'm not going to see and tell you that my plan was to go ahead and take and leave. No, it wasn't. That's what's in a lot of people who knew who's arriving at. No, bro. Listen, no, don't don't even just just go and do it. And people should like, bro, are you crazy? No, go ahead and go ahead and kill them. Kill them. I was lost, bro. Wow. Like when I be seeing a lot of people, like to me, I'm 40. OK. And to me, every day is a blessing. It's a blessing. It's a blessing. I don't take it for granted. You know, every day I think back. I have so many times that I slid between that crack. So many times that my life was spared. So many times that I feel like God, God was right there in the midst. There were so many times where I wanted to pull a trigger. It didn't go off. Yeah, yeah. It didn't go off. Yeah. But to be here. Traveling around the world and powering people. Man, you you'd be surprised. I was just telling the group where I just spoke at. Every day is an opportunity for you to get it right. That's real. Every day. Every day. If you woke up this morning, God did his part to rest on you. Man, you know, it's a blessing in everything that you think. Everything. Let's always tell people if you woke up this morning and put your pants on your leg instead on your head, you woke up in your right mind. You see what I'm saying? So you got to think, give it up flat. You already is ahead of the game. Thank you, God. When you get up in the morning. Thank you, God. So this is a whole different ball game, but go ahead. You got you got something you was about to say. Everything is mental and people don't understand. You have to start in your mind. Yeah, yeah, yeah, because even like when I was talking about, you have to put God first in everything. I'm not just talking about people talking about myself as well, because I know that I, you know, yes, I pray, yes, I read. But, you know, when you you convict yourself knowing that you could be doing that a lot more. And like I've told friends and told people, I said, let me tell you how you keep God in your life. It's always talking about him. Yeah, if you just think about him and you're not talking about him, you the devil can can attack you a lot easier. You talk about him all the time. It's like you keep him beside you in every conversation, everything you do. If you're talking about him, how are you going to do something wrong? Because you're talking about him. You talking about it now. Most of the times when you do something wrong, you're not thinking about God. At all. Not at all. So the more you talk about him, the more you read, the more you do things. Yeah. You stay in your right place where we should be. Yeah, I think like here lately, like the other day, when me and you was going through high issues or whatever, and you prayed with me, you know, and you we say, let's pray, you know, I think that's so powerful in the end where I can. You could see me going through what I'm going through and you can say, you know what, I think this is that. And I can respect you for that and say, let's pray. Come pray with me. Let's pray about it. We're making breakthroughs, even though we've been together for almost 20 years, we're still growing in each other. And you always do that. Yeah, always growing. What I feel, too, is that we don't we don't have genuine people who we can pray with. Yeah, many people. Too many people have too many hidden agendas, too many hidden intentions in the church. Yeah, those who you close with. Yeah. And we have to be careful because some people, they see the anointing on your life. Definitely. They see the glow and anything and everything they can, they would try to infiltrate that more like this, this union. Yeah, like this union. Yeah, no, I already know it. You know what I'm saying? No, I've been I'm watching it like like that's my job. You know what I mean? That's where Adam messed up when he didn't say anything. I'm going to say something. Right, right. And I'm going to protect what God is doing with me and my relationship with him. You got to. And with the woman that he got to. That's the important part right there. You got to you got to protect that in a way to where you you you speak to different things that are not supposed to happen. You're supposed to speak. That's what happened with Adam. He didn't speak. He didn't say anything. And she ate of the fruit the way we believe the way we read. And a woman is supposed to be submissive enough where she's going to allow him to be the head of the household, the head of her, as long as he is put in Christ the head of him. Right, because that's the hierarchy in which it should form. So as long as he's doing what he's supposed to do in the Lord, she's supposed to be supporting him and doing his decisions of how to protect the family and so forth. And I want to go back to, you know, we said church while ago. And I was going to go there like it's just it's an auditorium. And we got to make it in the reason to build it. That's all it is. But the word the word church comes from the word Ecclesia, Greek word. It means simply to be called out from among them. And somewhere along the line, somebody made it out of a building and and said, this is where you got to go. And I'm not saying you don't have to assemble yourselves or fellowship, but I am saying know who you are because that's important because at the end of the day, even when the pandemic hit and people had to separate themselves from everybody else, God still was in the midst of him. And I think because of the way they were programmed, it limited their power in who they were in God. So we have to be very careful for how we articulate that word. So in other words, you're saying when all of this happened, the curtains came back. There it is. Everyone was truly revealed who you really are. That's right. That's not only as a person, but your faith that your faith was tested. Oh, man. Oh, yeah. Your many shook. That's right. Many, many of them went in here and they start hiding. They start being so sacred and safe with everything. Definitely. Definitely. And that's why I just wanted to say that because that needs to be said. It needs to be it needs to be exposed. Because if you don't talk about it, it continues to grow. But when you speak on it, then people have to acknowledge. So on this platform, we're going to make sure that the masses understand that there's a power within them, no matter who they are and no matter where they're at when they believe in God. Come on. That's important. And you can't you can't be afraid to to speak and talk about God in a way that is uncommon in certain areas. Yeah. Around certain people. Yeah. You know, and we are in an industry and we got to be careful because we don't know who believe what. Yeah, you can't offend people. You know what I'm saying? I don't even go there because when I hear people say that and this is how I train my mind. Think about Paul, Paul was so bold to speak about Christ and his beliefs and everything that he didn't care. You could be the governor, you could be anybody. He going to tell you that's exactly how we should be. And I told I told myself, I tell people, I said, Paul was just a man. Peter was just a man. If they did it, you can do it. You can do it. Yeah, you should do it. Yeah. Well, that not only that, if you do it, then lives can change. And it goes back to because I feel like when I gave my life to Christ, when I gave my life to Christ, it caused a domino effect. I saw my sister start to get a more relationship in depth with God. I saw my mom and my other people that I knew that was in my family start having conversations about relationships with God. When I when I came around, you know, the same people who I know I sold drugs with when I come visit my mom, she made sure don't sell that stuff around my boy. You see, I'm like, my I sold the same stuff. You know, my brothers, I won't they won't. I ain't gonna drink this beer because you're I'm the same, you know, it. But that just shows you when you are a new creation, create on creation creation. Yes, God is in it. And when God is in it, I'm telling you right now that everything around you will change. The people will change. You don't have to change. You're the same person. You don't have to tell them it comes out. The system. I think that's what I teach. That's this whole platform is set up that way because one. Yeah, you have to be approachable. If you come up and you make rules and regulations and you you don't know because you your faith is weak. That's what's happening. A lot of time, the weak faith is what prevents people from pretty much putting themselves in situations where they could help a mass of people. It's because of their weak faith, because if your faith is strong, you believe that God is who he is and that he raised Jesus Christ from the dead. Then you you don't mind, you know, that same power in you. So you don't mind you don't mind people doing whatever because you supposed to be that light that guides them out of darkness. But what I want to say, y'all don't get it twisted. It's a daily walk. That's a daily walk. Every single daily walk reminding yourself to stay on the straight and narrow, just like an alcoholic, yes, who is saying, OK, I got to keep going to A.A. I got to keep doing this. So I don't go into that bar and get a drink. Even and the devil come at you even. Oh, type of. He's trying to walk straight, you know, your weakness. He know your weaknesses. So he going to have those friends coming over, drinking in front of you, doing this, doing that, just to tempt you. But or most people always relapse whenever it's an argument with somebody or something devastating or, you know, what I mean, and then they go right back to drinking or going. So it's the same thing, like walking that path in Christ. You going back to, man, I'm just going to go. And it's so funny. What I was saying is that even although we're walking in Christ and stuff like that, a devil is slick. He will all day God bless you with all the promotions to travel, to talk to people, to do this, to do that. But the busier we get is the more is the less time we have for Christ, because we don't have that time to read and to do the things that we should be doing. You're going to send a jazzy bear. Yeah, yeah, yeah. You see what I mean? You're going to have to watch. You're going to say. Right. So you have to watch your blessing. Yeah, somebody who want to take what we want to manipulate, you know, he goes, you know, he goes, what we had a conversation today. Yeah, yeah, he goes, send somebody knowing, hey, this is this is this is the platform be perfect. And it's going to it's going to give you that leverage. He like, oh, you know, but to me and to say to echo what you're saying, to say that that the more God gives you, the more responsibilities you have. I always look at the fact that if I do X, Y, Z, how many people is going to pay the price for that? And I didn't used to think like that. I didn't used to think I thought differently. I don't care. I mean, but no, I can't think that way because there's a lot of people's souls is at stake by my decisions. So every day you have to go, oh, my God, it is a journey. It is it is tough. And the viewers not saying everything that I just had spoke about the day. I swear, I say, I will tell the gentleman and the ladies and I'm like, listen, it's here, it starts here. Every day is a fight. Every day is a battle. Every day you got to climb. Yeah, it's not easy. Oh, just because you saying that you's a Christian, you think it's going to be a catwalk. Try it. Listen, I'm a factual financial book. Don't even say that. No, the book says them to live godless shall shall suffer persecution. And it also says that if you walk after the spirit, you won't fulfill the lust of the flesh. So when you guys were talking, I just kept thinking about that because if you can stay in that joy, if you can stay in that love and that faith and that gentleness and that meekness and that, you know, then you can you won't fulfill those lusts of the flesh. You see what I'm saying? You you will do the things and it's not easy thing to do. Those nine things that it asked you to do in Galatians, Chapter five, it ain't easy to stay on that course. It's nine simple things. But boy, it's tough to parallel them, you know, with your lifestyle. Sometimes just one. That's what I'm trying to say. Just to try to. But that long suffering is the one. But it means you should be able to suffer long through any situation. And then we we cry. It's better said than done. I've been through two divorces. Yeah, I mean, yeah. And I was in the church. There you go. I'm saying my first marriage. I was I was part of the praise and worship. I was a part of the a few things. I was I was heavily active, but my marriage was suffering. And see that there it is again. There there it is. It's that tapping into that personal relationship with God that can can pretty much stabilize you and who you are. And you and I both know that that no matter where you go, what you're seeking, if you're not. Tapt into that Holy Spirit with God, you got to be. It can cleanse everything, all unrighteousness, but you got to be tapped in. It don't matter where you go and who it matters who you know. But as you as you go and you you. OK, I'm going to go get this divorce. OK, I'm and you steadily going and you being attacked by Satan. And you and I both know if you had God in his rightful place, then it would you wouldn't be dealing with this. So let me ask you this because you guys say I've been married. Y'all been together for 18 years, 18 years and out of the 18 years. And I love asking this question. I'm sorry. Out of 18 years, how many years you can say been good? Because the reason why I can't I can't I can't speak about 18 because my short run is was real short. I was running at one first marriage of one year. Those two years, the second was one year. I'm going to answer it like this. And his answer will be different from mine. And the only reason I'm able to answer this now is because the frame of mind that I'm at right now, right. And time is the fact that. I would say all OK, because. If you don't go through, you don't grow. You know what I mean? And I'm learning that. So you have to go through. So when you see you having problems, you have to learn how to handle it. For me in my life, any time things come up, that is against God or against the way in which you should live. I recognize it as a devil right off the bat. But that wasn't me back in the day. When you're young, you're not thinking, just go with the flow and stuff like that. Whatever you feel, just like an alcoholic. I'm going to go back to that because I use that as a good example, especially because of pandemic. A lot of people turn alcoholic nowadays, but. But you have to recognize that you're alcoholic to turn and say, OK, I'm going to get help. I'm going to need to change my thinking, change my life, change my everything. OK. So, for example, you're married. And I don't know whatever happened in your marriage and whatever. But say, you know, in church, those ladies after you and stuff like that, you know, when they come at you and they come at you in a wrong way, you're like, OK, the devil is using you. Not say you're calling them the devil, but the devil is using you to get to me. So in order for you to overcome that, you have to first acknowledge that that is the devil. Not, oh, my God, you think I'm fine. I'm old, but I'm not. I still got it. And that's not the godly person in you saying those things. But that's when you get into the flesh and you're saying these things. So if you tap into the first thing you recognize, oh, that's the devil. You know how to handle it if. But we don't think that way when adversities come at us. But if you did, you'd be like, oh, no, right. You can identify it. Exactly. Once you identify it, you can overcome it. Yeah. Yeah. And that's what I use as my tactic. Now in today's day, you know what I mean? And it's helped me a lot. And I've told a lot of my friends or anybody that I come in contact with and the discussion comes up because I tell people all the time when you go through things, you have to spread your story because you don't know who is going to help. Right. And I say, you don't have to do it exactly like how I do it. Take it and make it your own, but use it to better your life. That's why when we do this platform, I love this platform because I'm hoping that someone out there will hear the stories and take it and use it in their life to make them life their life better. You know what I mean? And I would I would just add to what you're saying, you know, 18 years. Like I said, I think it's a process. I think I think a lot of times people get married because they say, you know, or they leave because they say, I'm not happy. But that was me. I'm not happy. What make you think that you're supposed to be so happy? But, you know, wait a minute, let me go there for a second. But you made a covenant before God. Yeah. And this covenant that you made, it wasn't about your happiness, to be honest with you. It was a covenant before God that you had made a vow. You see what I'm saying? Now, as you grow, you start to learn these things that it's not about you. It's about God. So it's OK for one to go and get a divorce. The Bible speaks about a divorce, but he said before, you know, that was because of the hardness of your hearts that I gave you that it wasn't this one, something that it was because of how you felt to have done that to you. So all I'm saying is as you evolve, we've had some things that we went through that could have shut the whole thing down. But it wasn't about being happy. Right. You we got kids. Yeah. And a lot of times people say, don't let the kids be the reason. But if you're in the Bible, it'll tell you that the kids are the reason. So the devil is still playing those crafty games with you. And you know, I'm just not happy that he gets you off your game with God. And now here you are trying to figure it out all over again. Notice I didn't go back into the divorce statement. Just trying to figure it's about the relationship between you and God. It has nothing to do with you leaving this for a new year. It's about the relationship between you and God. And once you figure that out, everything will start falling. But you were about to say something. I'm going to hear what I was saying. Yeah, because you were talking about that's the reason why you. Yeah, yeah, I mean, I mean, I want you to get your get your job in there. Get your job in there. There's nothing but a job. I need to knock out punches over it. You already you you pivot over there. Every swing you are you ready. Oh, it's the truth, though it is. And the reason why I asked that asked that question, because you know, I'm listening, I'm watching and I'm huge on energy. Yeah, real big on energy. Yeah. And you know, and I think, you know, we don't talk about that covenant. We don't talk about love in the black community. We don't, you know, and what we consider love is Beyonce and Jay-Z. OK, you know, we don't talk about God the way we need to in settings like this. We don't the only way to talk about God maybe is only on Sundays and Wednesdays. So when you when you don't have this right here, where you have people saying, man, we've been together 20, married for 18 and we went through. Listen, we went through it. We we still going through it and we going through it together. We don't and people will start younger people in general will start because right now it's those who are younger that will see and understand that maybe I have been looking at this whole relationship thing the wrong way. Maybe maybe I have been Miss Miss under maybe I have been lied to about the only way you can have a relationship with God if I go to church. You know, I mean, like we have to have these conversations. We have to and a lot of people they shy away from these conversations because there was a lot of things that that people are not ready to have conversations about because there's a lot of things that I deal with that I'm dealing with that I'm still going through. Yeah. And I don't want to talk about relationships because guess what? Everyone that I went through, everyone that I've been through, every woman that I have, I've always messed it up. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So I never knew how to fight in a relationship. Yeah. Yeah. I've always learned I'm gone. Yeah, that's good that you've owned up to that. And you know, that's what you're the man in the relationship. You are the head. So you're the one who's supposed to be trying to hold it together. You know what I mean? So you have to know that you have to pull closer to God and know your role as the head of that household. And another thing you have to ask yourself is not just your relationship, but how many other things have you given up on? Yeah, because it's a trend. It ain't no. It ain't just that one thing. And that's the whole game. And that's why you're you're compromising. That's a whole nother. That's a whole nother thing. Yeah, you're right. You're compromising at that point. And basically you saying you don't even realize it. No, I'm going to put you out right here. Jesus, I'll be back. And you act like you can do it on your own. That's what we do. We compromise and we get comfortable in our in our greatness and it becomes about us. It becomes self-centered. And so that's why you say, you know what the hell with this? I'm out of here. You was raised to quit. Yeah. And you was raised to quit. You watch your father quit on your mom. You watch your father walk out of your life. You internalize that you use that. I watched it. You know what I mean? And so you gave up in school. You gave up in everything. Every time it got tough, you quit. So you was raised to quit. So just because I'm prophesying to myself right now. You know, and that's what our witness. So every time something got tough for me, I just knew how to wave the flag. Yeah, yeah. That's all I know how to do. I'm done. It was easy for me to wave the flag. If I wave, it's easy to quit. And it goes back to what we were saying earlier, is everything's mental. Mental. Everything's mental. It all goes back to God. To mental. I tell it like, if I come over there right now and I kick you in your knee, your mind sends a signal to your body. Say, hey, that hurts. Who said that hurts? Who said that hurts? Your mind, what happened to it? Back then, our ancestors didn't take medication. They mind healed, your mind heals the body. Your mind heals. Listen, your mind has so much power, what you think of, what you speak, and what you do. Again, speak, think, and do. Whatever I have here, I'ma speak it from my mouth. Whatever I speak from my mouth, I'ma do it. There's so much power just in those three. That's the same thing I say all the time. That's why it's funny to me as you talk. It's the same thing. But this is why you and I connect like, the first time you talk, we were like, bro, we can't talk too long. We'll be on this phone all day. Yeah, yeah, because at the end of the day, it's so true that you speak things in the, God exists. In existence, yeah. You are the image of God, and you speak things in the existence. Therefore, you should be very careful it comes out of your mouth. And I feel like this- And be very specific. You gotta be. You gotta be very specific. Jesus, specific. You know, I'm from the South. So, you know, we say, I asses with our peas. Yeah. So, Pacific, what? Well, Atlantic? Like, no, sir. But, you know, there are so many people need to see and witness young men that has this much fire for God and is willing to talk about God anywhere. I tell somebody, listen, bro, I will cry in a minute. Bro, listen, I will give a praise break in a heartbeat and I will straighten you out in a heartbeat too. You know what I mean? You know, and people got to understand it. Like, bro, like, to walk this walk, the only thing you're sacrificing is yourself. That's it. My question to you is, I know that you've been doing the motivational speaking since, what, 2006? 17. To 2017, because you got out in 2006. So, it took you a while to start the motivational speaking. I ran from it. Okay, that's it. Oh, yes. That's not like Jonah, like what we're talking about. Yes, I ran from it. I ran from it. So, that long, so that was like 11 years. 11, from 2006, I started mentoring. And- Your YouTube was started from 2006. I went back and I'm like, okay. You know, I was just tempering with things, you know, I was just trying to experience some things, trying to figure this thing out. So, you didn't think you were ready yet? I got ahead of God. I feel like what he was calling me to do, it wasn't him what he was telling me to do. I was going on what I wanted to do. And everything that I was trying to do wasn't working. It wasn't working. I just felt so out of place. I'm like, this, I gotta share this story. And I tell people, I didn't choose this platform. It chose me. Literally, if people don't believe in God, that's on you, but God is real. I had many encounters. My last encounter with God was I was woken out of my sleep. Not just by no voice, but something physical. Literally, 2012, I was woken about my sleep and somebody shook my leg and I'm the only one in this house. And I remember watching a movie called A Passion of the Christ. Love that movie. And the thing what happened is that when I watched that movie, I was afraid, I was startled, but I was confused. God, what are you trying to tell me? Had somebody from Hawaii reach out to me and tell me that, hey, we wanna let you know that we wanna tell you that God is telling me to tell you that you're gonna be on a platform traveling all around the world. This was in 2012. This is the same dream and vision I had, but I ain't saying that to this person because I don't even really know you. Then two, three days later, that same person reached out to me again and said, listen, I don't know why God telling me to tell you this, but whatever he's telling you to do, you better do it. He said, because I had a dream that you're gonna be author of five best-selling books. You're gonna be traveling around the world, inspiring people. And everything that God started showing to me, revealing to me, I started doing, and it started happening. Writing a book, starting an apparel, starting a nonprofit for boys, having a platform to where I can use my past experiences to change and save lives. And so to have this opportunity, I can't help but give God nothing but glory because this is your work. This is not my work. This is not my doing, but how I'm able to go in the pits of hell, when I'm able to pull those that's in the dark out, when I'm able to go on certain platforms with those who wear suits and ties and I can wear a ball cap and some Nike Air Maxes and still change lives and still impact and empower people. How I'm able to do these things and come from the background that I have, I don't have the educational background. I don't have the mentors. I didn't go to college and do all this stuff. I didn't have a person telling me, you're gonna graduate school. I didn't play no sports. I was selling dope at 12 and 13 years old. I was carrying a firearm at 13, but I was facing a life sentence at 13 years old. You know, so when people talk about how, bro, this is God. This is God's work. This is not my work. I'm just doing the work. He's doing the blessing. That's how it works. You do his will and guess what he do? Then he'll bless you. And now bless is not always money. That's what a lot of people that I wish churches stop preaching that. I really wish churches stop preaching finances. It's things. It's things. Overcoming something is a blessing. It stopped praying for God to bless you with something. God, listen, it's almost, I tell people, it's almost like going to your parents and I was asking for something. Why not go to your parents? Like, do you need me to do something? Yeah. Dad, you need me to do something? You need help with something? I get it. You know what I'm saying? Why not go to God? I said, God, use me. Use me to whatever I need to do for your good, for your greater good. Use me. Cause if I die today, I swear for God, I don't want no preacher preaching at my funeral. You know what I'm saying? I said, listen, I told my sister, I'm gonna tell you right now, I don't want no preacher. I said, you better let everybody come up and get two minutes, my whole entire service. Cause I know I inspire, I impact many people and let people get that time. I don't need, I don't need nobody standing up at my funeral talking about, listen, let me put me on a backdrop and show my videos and see the work. Now, do it. That's powerful. Is it more that I could have done? Yes. Always. Always. But his will will be done? Yes. But I'm steady pouring. I'm steady pouring. I poured into the dude who was in it just now. I know. That's the whole board. I'm gonna give you a nugget. Maybe it'll resonate with you. Today, tomorrow, next week, I don't know. To the young lady who was with him. Yeah. Never be ashamed to talk about God. Yeah, never, never. You were saying that, oh my God, yeah. Never be ashamed to talk about God anywhere. That's it. That's how the doors is gonna open. That's how you're gonna be able to walk in places no one able to walk into. So I know earlier you were talking, you said you were married twice. Twice? Oh my God. Did you have any kids? I have three beautiful, amazing, gorgeous little girls. Eleven, Raniah, six, Kaelin, and that number two, Iriah. Iriah. Those are pretty names. Iriah, yes. No boys. No boys, and I don't want no boys. I don't think I can have boys. But I think, and it's another thing, God knew what to do. You see how I direct everything back to God. And I say that because those two relationships, those two marriages that I was in, they had sons. And the torture, the abuse my father gave to me, I saw it come out on them. I saw it come out on them. When it was time for me to be disciplined, I didn't know the power in just sitting them down and talking. It was always, I'm gonna whoop you. I'm gonna toughen you up. And I had to have a reality check because I was like, whoa, whoa. I'm becoming what I do. Oh yeah, that person looked too familiar. I started seeing my father. And so I think God, because one, to have girls, you can't be tough. You can't be hard. You can't listen. You can't push them around. You can't listen. You have to understand love, compassion. You have to be respectful. Because you don't want him to go after a man who looks like that type of man that you were. Yeah, it's not even really that, but that too. Because I didn't have a heart for women. I really didn't, I didn't even respect my mom. So how can I respect any woman that I'm married to? I can't. I don't even have a relationship with my mom. So I mean, I don't know. They say, listen, you pay attention how a man loves his mother. That's how he's gonna love you. Yeah, I've heard that. You know, and I believe that. So I didn't have that relationship. So I didn't know how to love a woman. So let alone when I had my first daughter, I knew how to love. I knew how to get this little girl in my heart. And she had my heart. Then the second one came. Oh, KK, KK gonna let you know about her dad. That's my thing. Listen, don't say nothing stupid at your mouth. At six years old, she's gonna say something. And a little two-year-old, she gonna tell everybody that's her daddy. What was it that you were starting to tell me off the air about when you had your kids? There's something you couldn't tell? Yeah. And again, I want people to understand that you're gonna make mistakes all your life.