 So this person has lost their job because of coronavirus and they're not sure if they're eligible for the government benefit. So I'm going to pretend to be from Centrelink and say that they are not eligible for the government, for the- And I just got away with a cheeky piss in the bottle. Fuck. Shit! Michael fell down! Michael fell down! Shit, fuck the green screen up. All right, here we go. I'm calling Adrian and I'm Sam from Centrelink. Hello. Hello, am I speaking with Adrian? Yes, you are. Hey, mate, I'm Sam. I'm from Centrelink and we're just doing the rounds and just calling a few people who have applied for the government benefit. Have you got a second at all? Yeah, sure. Great. So yeah, we're just calling to give you a bit of an update and it looks like that because you were working in the gaming industry, that you're not actually eligible for any benefits and only a rule has been passed very recently and you're part of a very unfortunate few. You actually have to pay for your application submission. So it's a cost of $300 of just some admin fees that Centrelink has to sort of, you know, process your application and all that sort of stuff. So unfortunately, you're not eligible due to the industry you're working in and you will be receiving a $300 bill for that, which I know is probably not something that you wanted to hear. Okay. So yeah, we'll be sending that through soon and you'll sort of have five business days to pay that and then that sort of jumps up to it doubles and a half. So it'll be up to $750 there, if you don't pay that within five business days. So I'm sorry, just to clarify with you. So I have to pay a $300, but that does that. So what does that, what am I paying $300 for? Do you understand what I'm sort of going to hand? Yeah, yeah, sure. So that just covers the admin fees, the processing fees. So when everyone submits an application, they, you know, someone on our end has to go through and do across the eyes and dot the T's, if you will. Yeah, yeah, I understand that. Yeah, so it's just... I'm just, no, you're, I'm not, I'm just trying to wrap my head around what you're telling me right now is what I'm trying to do. Yeah. I have to pay a $300 admin fee. Yeah. So does that mean I still get the benefit that I've applied for or I'm not getting that? Is that what you're saying? Well, because of the industry that you're in and you were working in a gaming room, is that correct? Yeah. So because it's gambling, anyone in the gaming industry is not eligible for any sort of benefits at all. And it's sort of, to be honest, it's a bit frowned upon. The gaming industry is, yeah, it's, it's, it's quite difficult to receive any benefits at all just because the gaming community sort of like ruins lives. So it's, it's, yeah, it's debatable, but yeah, OK. Yeah. So it's sort of, I know, I know it would be hard to hear right now, but yeah, it's, I've just been calling people all day and just letting them know, like, yeah, you're sorry. You're not. Well, I had to pay the gaming ruins lives, but yeah, anyway, I don't want to get to an owner. Well, people do people do get addicted to gambling. And so some people get addicted to alcohol, mate. But anyway, I don't want to. Yeah. So I'm just so you're telling me that I have to pay a three hundred dollar admin fee and I'm not eligible for a benefit. Is that what you're telling me? So I'm paying three hundred dollars to not receive a benefit. Well, you're telling me. Well, the three hundred dollars is for the application submission that that you sent through. And yeah, unfortunately, your application was denied. So yeah, you won't be receiving any benefits whatsoever. So I've applied for a benefit that I'm not eligible to receive. And I have to pay a three hundred dollar fee to apply for it and pay within five business days. Otherwise, I have to pay three hundred dollars within five business days to receive no benefit at all. Well, you're telling me. Yeah, well, it's not to receive no benefit, but it's separate to the the benefit itself. So you're you're having to pay three hundred dollars because you're because of the application that you submitted. And it says that it says that on the very fine print at the bottom of the website on my gov there, it says, actually, they're you are susceptible to admin fees and you're adding to the problem. Yeah. Yeah. So yeah, you know, the processing fee. So if you were eligible, yeah, it would be OK. But, you know, like I said, the gaming industry, it's a bit of a it's a bit of a gray area. And well, it's a bit of a dark area. I understand you're doing your job. I'm not I'm not arguing with I'm just I'm sorry. Who was speaking to Sam and who are you calling from? Like, who am I actually talking to right now? I'm very sorry. I'm just I'm trying to wrap my head around what's going on right now. Totally from where? Totally understand. I'm calling on behalf of Centrelink. So I'll work at one of the things I'm saying. Yes, exactly. OK. And so you're saying my application has been denied. Yeah. And I have to pay a three hundred dollar admin fee within five days of receiving the bill. That is correct. And you should receive the bill shortly after a conversation is terminated. And how will I be receiving that bill? Just by mail or no, that'll be via email. So yeah, by email. Yes, correct. And that's purely because I'm working in a gaming industry. Well, your application was denied because of your job. You know, look at it sort of it makes sense because you're sort of contributing to more financial loss for a lot of people. So, you know, the government sort of comes down hard on anyone who works in the gaming industry exclusively. So yeah, the application was denied because of that. And then also just the processing fee of your application took a little while. So that that's where the three hundred dollars admin fee comes in. Yeah, I'm very confused. OK. Yeah. And like, obviously, I know it's a, you know, not a phone. It's not it's not an easy phone call for either of us. But at the end of the day, you're working in industry that is a quiet poisonous and takes money from innocent people. So what we are you saying is to me right now? Well, it's are you serious? It's it's sort of what we've been what we've been instructed to say. Look, I've had I've had that I work in a poisonous industry that's taking money from innocent people. OK, well, that's more of a personal opinion. And I've got friends who are addicted to you've said that. That's literally what you just told me. Look, look, I've I've got friends and family who have gambling problems. OK. And and I'm personally responsible for that. Well, look, you work in an industry that does this sort of thing to people. You know what I mean? So it's yeah, I'm sorry. You are responsible. It's hearsay. I'm responsible for that. No, everyone who contributes to the industry is contributing to the problem as far as I'm concerned. Well, that's this is a pretty unprofessional phone call I'm having right now with all due respect, Sam. I'm going to hang up now. Wait, before you leave, there's one last thing I need to tell you. It's a prank call. OK, your friend says your friend has set you up. You're actually on the Marty and Michael podcast. And you have not your application has not been denied. And I'm definitely not for fucking Centering. Sorry to do it, dude. So to stress you out, we're just trying. You haven't stressed me out. Oh, it's just a very angry phone call. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I heard you typing. You were typing away at the conversation recording stuff. Oh, yeah, yeah. Dude, it pops to you because it was fucking utter bullshit. Professional. I'm I'm certain you'll get your seat and make good on you for fucking. Yeah, yeah. We're just trying to stir you up that you didn't fucking bite at all. Yeah, no worries, mate. Lovely to meet you. Good luck with everything. I think you're good luck to you guys. No worries. Awesome. Thanks, mate. See you later. Next week, we'll be smoking shards of meth. Well, stay tuned for that. And don't forget that we. Well, more simply, we are the best. Well, the best. We're the best. We're the best. We're the best. We're the best. We're the best. We're the best.