 Book 2, Chapter 6, of their Mutual Child. This is a LibriVox recording, all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information, not a volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recording by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org. Their Mutual Child by P. G. Woodhouse. Book 2, Chapter 6, The Outcasts. Three months of his new life had gone by before Kirk awoke from the stupor which had gripped him as the result of the general upheaval of his world. Ever since his return from Columbia, he had honestly been intending to resume his painting and attacking it, this time in a business-like way, to try to mould himself into the semblance of an efficient artist. His mind had been full of fine resolutions. He would engage a good teacher, some competent artist, whom Fortune had not treated well, and who would be glad of the job. Washington Square and its neighbourhood were full of them. Settle down grimly working regular hours to recover lost ground. But the rush of life as lived on the upper avenue had swept him away. He had been carried along on the rapids of dinners, parties, dances, theatres, luncheons and the rest, and his great resolve had gone bobbing away from him on the current. He had recovered it now and climbed painfully ashore, feeling bruised and exhausted but determined. Among the motley crowd which had made the studio a home in the days of Kirk's bachelorhood had been an artist. One might almost say an ex-artist named Robert Dwight Penway. An over fondness for Rye Whiskey at the Brevort Cafe had handicapped Robert as an active force in the world of New York art. As a practical worker he was not greatly esteemed, least of all by the editors of magazines who had paid him advanced checks, for work which, when delivered at all, was delivered too late for publication. These, once bitten, were now twice shy of Mr. Penway. They did not deny his great talents, which were indeed indisputable. But they were fixed in their determination not to make use of them. Fate could have provided no more suitable ally for Kirk. It was universally admitted around Washington Square and grudgingly downtown that in the matter of theory Mr. Penway excelled. He could teach to perfection what he was too erratic to practice. Robert Dwight Penway, run to earth one sultry evening in the Brevort, welcomed Kirk as a brother. As a rich brother. Even when his first impression that he was to have the run of the house on Fifth Avenue and mix freely with touchable multimillionaires had been corrected, his attitude was still brotherly. He parted from Kirk with many solemn promises to present himself at the studio daily and teach him enough art to put him clear at the top of the profession. Way above these other dubs, asserted Mr. Penway. Robert Dwight Penway's attitude towards his contemporaries in art bore a striking resemblance to Steve's estimate of his successors in the middleweight department of the American prize ring. Surprisingly to those who knew him, Mr. Penway was as good as his word. Suddenly Kirk's terms had been extremely generous. But he had thrown away many a contract of equal value in his palmy days. Possibly his activity was due to his liking for Kirk, or it may have been that the prospect of sitting by with a cigar while somebody else worked, with nothing to do all day except offer criticism and advice, appealed to him. At any rate, he appeared at the studio on the following afternoon, completely sober and excessively critical. He examined the canvases which Kirk had hauled from the shelves and corners for his inspection. One after another, he gazed upon them in an increasingly significant silence. When the last one was laid aside, he delivered judgment. Golly, he said. Kirk flushed. It was not that he was not in complete agreement with the verdict. Looking at these paintings, some of which he had in the old days thought extremely good. He was forced to admit that Golly was the only possible criticism. He had not seen them for a long time, and absence had enabled him to correct first impressions. Moreover, something had happened to him, causing him to detect flaws where he had seen only merits. I had sharpened his powers of judgment. He was a grown man, looking at the follies of his youth. Burn them, said Mr. Penmay, lighting a cigar with the air of one restoring his tissues after a strenuous ordeal. Burn the lot, they're awful. Darn amateur nightmares, they offend the eye, cast them into a burning fiery furnace. Kirk nodded. The criticism was just. It erred, if at all, on the side of mildness. Certainly, something had happened to him since he had perpetrated those doves. He had developed. He saw things with new eyes. I guess I better start writing again at the beginning, he said. Early on that, amended Mr. Penmay. So Kirk settled down to a routine of hard work, and so doing drove another blow at the wedge which was separating his life from Ruth's. There were days now when they did not meet at all, and others when they saw each other only for a few short moments in which neither seemed to have much to say. Ruth had made a perfunctory protest against the new departure. Really, she said. It does seem absurd for you to spend all your time down at that old studio. It isn't as if you had to, but of course if you want to. And she had gone on to speak of other subjects. It was plain to Kirk that his absence scarcely affected her. She was still in the rapids, and every day carried her further away from him. It did not hurt him now. A sort of apathy seemed to have fallen on him. The old days became more and more remote. Sometimes he doubted whether anything remained of her former love for him, and sometimes he wondered if he still loved her. She was so different that it was almost as if she were a stranger. Once they had had everything in common. Now it seemed to him they had nothing. Not even Bill. He did not brood upon it. He gave himself no time for that. He worked doggedly on under the blasphemous but efficient guidance of Mr. Penway. He was becoming a man with a fixed idea, the idea of making good. He began to make headway. His beginnings were small but practical. He no longer sat down when the spirit moved him to dash off vague masterpieces, which might turn into something quite unexpected on the road to completion. He snatched at anything definite that presented itself. Sometimes it was a couple of illustrations to a short story in one of the minor magazines. Sometimes a picture to go with an eulogy of a patent midson. Whatever it was he seized upon it and put into it all the talent he possessed. And thanks to the indefatigable coaching of Robert Dwight Penway a certain merit was beginning to creep into his work. His drawing was growing firmer. He no longer shirked difficulties. Mr. Penway was good enough to approve his progress. Being free from any morbid distaste for himself he attributed that progress to its proper source. As he said once in a moment of expansive candor he could, given a free hand and something to drink and smoke while doing it make an artist out of two sticks and a lump of coal. Why, I made you turn out things that are like something on earth, my boy," he said proudly. And that, he added, as he reached out for the bottle of bourbon which Kirk had provided for him, is going some. Kirk was far too grateful to resent the slightly unflattering note. A more spirited man might have detected in the remark. Only once during those days did Kirk allow himself to weaken and admit to himself how wretched he was. He was drawing a picture of Steve at the time and Steve had the sympathy which encourages weakness in others. It was a significant sign of his changed attitude towards his profession that he was not drawing Steve as a figure in an allegorical picture or as Apollo or the Toiler but simply as a well-developed young man who had had the good sense to support his nethergarments with Middleton's undeniable suspenders. The picture when completed would show Steve smirking down at the region of his waistline and announcing with pride and satisfaction their Middletons. Kirk was putting all he knew into the work and his face as he drew was dark and gloomy. Steve noted this with concern. He had perceived for some time that Kirk had changed. He had lost all his old boyish enjoyment of the aspiring bouts and he threw the medicine ball with an absent gloom almost equal to Bailey's. It had not occurred to Steve to question Kirk about this. If Kirk had anything on his mind which he wished to impart, he would say it. Meanwhile, the friendly thing for him to do was to be quiet and pretend to notice nothing. It seemed to Steve that nothing was going right these days. Here was he chafing at his inability to open his heart to Mamie. Here was Kirk obviously in trouble and a smaller thing but of interest as showing how universal the present depression was, there was Bailey Bannister, equally obviously much worried over something or other. For Bailey had reinstated Steve in the place he had occupied before old John Bannister had dismissed him and for some time past, Steve had marked him down as a man with a secret trouble. He had never been of a riotously cheerful disposition but it had been possible once to draw him into conversation and at the close of the morning's exercises. Now he hardly spoke and often when Steve arrived in the morning he was informed that Mr Bannister had started for Wall Street early on important business. These things troubled Steve. His simple soul abhorred a mystery. Bailey was the case of Kirk that worried him most for he half guessed that the latter's gloom had to do with Ruth and he worshipped Ruth. Kirk laid down his sketch and got up. I guess that'll do for the moment Steve, he said. Steve relaxed the attitude of proud satisfaction which he had assumed in order to do justice to the undeniable suspenders and stretched himself and sat down. He was certainly out working to beat the band just now, squire. He remarked, It's a pretty good thing work Steve, said Kirk. If it does nothing else it keeps you from thinking. He knew it was feeble of him but he was powerfully impelled to relief himself by confiding his wretchedness to Steve. He did not say much, he told himself plausibly just enough to lighten the burden a little. He would not be disloyal to Ruth. He had not sunk to that. After all, Steve was Steve. It was not like blurting out his troubles to a stranger. It would harm nobody and do him a great deal of good if he talked to Steve. He relit his pipe which had gone out during a tense spell of work on the suspenders. Well, Steve, he said, What do you think of life? How is this best of all possible worlds treating you? Steve deposed that life was pretty punk. You're a great describer, Steve. You've hit it first time. Punk is the word. It's funny. If you look at it properly, take my own case. The superficial observer, whose apt to be a bonehead would say that I ought to be seeing psalms of joy. I'm married to the woman I wanted to marry. I have a son who, not to be fulsome, is a perfectly good sort of son. I have no financial troubles. I eat well. I have ceased to tremble when I see a job of work. In fact, I have advanced in my art to such an extent that shrewd businessmen like Middleton put the pictorial side of their undeniable suspenders in my hands and go off to play golf with their minds easy, having perfect confidence in my skill and judgment. Maybe if I can't be merry and bright, who can? Do you find me merry and bright, Steve? I've seen you in better shape," said Steve cautiously. I felt him better shape. Steve coughed. The conversation was about to become delicate. What's eating you, Colonel? He asked presently. Kirk frowned in silence at the undeniable for a few moments. Then the pent-up misery of months ended in a cascade of words. He jumped up and began to walk restlessly about the studio. Damn it, Steve, I ought not to say a word I know. It's weak and cowardly and bad taste and everything else you can think of to speak of it, even to you. One's supposed to stand this sort of roasting at the stake with a grin, as if one enjoyed it. But after all, you are different. It's not as if it was anyone. You are different, aren't you? Sure. Well, you know what's wrong as well as I do. Sureest thing you know, it's hit me too. How's that? Well, things aren't the same. That's about what it comes to. Kirk stopped and looked at him. His expression was wistful. I ought not to be talking about it. You go right ahead, Squire," said Steve soothingly. I know just how you feel, and I guess talking's not going to do any harm. Actually, if I wasn't here, look on it as a monologue. I don't amount to anything. The house last Steve? Steve reflected. About a couple of weeks ago, I reckon. See the kid? Steve shook his head. His nibs ain't my longsuit these days. I may be wrong, but I got the idea there was a deadline for me about three blocks away from the nursery. Ours king was the coast clear, but he said the porter dame was in the ring. So I kind of thought I'd better away. I don't seem to fit in with all them white tiles and thermometers. You used to see him every day when we were here. And you didn't seem to contaminate him as far as anyone could notice. There was silence. Do you see him often, Colonel? Kirk laughed. Oh yes, I'm favoured. I pay a state visit every day. Think of that. I sit in a chair at the other end of the room while Mrs. Porter stands between us to see I don't start anything. Bill plays with his sterilised bricks. Occasionally he and I exchange a few civil words. It's as jolly and sociable as you could want. We have great times. Say, on the level, I wonder you stand for it. I've got to stand for it. He's your kid. Not exclusively, I have a partner, Steve. Steve snorted dolefully. And it held the way things break loose in this world, he sighed. Who would have thought two years ago? Do you make it only two? I should have put it at about two thousand. Honest squire, if anyone had told me then that Miss Ruth had it in her to take up with all these full stunts. Well, can't say I was prepared for it. Steve coughed again. Kirk was in an expansive mood this afternoon and the occasion was ideal for the putting forward of certain views which he had long wished to impart. But on the other hand, the subject was a peculiarly delicate one. It has been well said that it is better for a third party to deal with a buzzsaw than to interfere between husband and wife. And Steve was constitutionally averse to anything that savored of butting in. Still, Kirk had turned the talk into this channel. He decided to risk it. If I were you, he said, I'd get busy and start something. Such as what? Steve decided to abandon caution and speak his mind. Him almost as much as Kirk, the existing state of things had driven to desperation. Though in a sense, he was only a spectator. The fact that the altered conditions of Kirk's life involved his almost complete separation from Mamie gave him what might be called a stake in the affair. The brief and rare glimpses which he got of her nowadays made it absolutely impossible for him to conduct his wooing on a business-like basis. A different man cannot possibly achieve any success in odd moments. Constant propinquity is the only hope. That fact alone, he considered, almost gave him the right to interfere. And apart from that, his affection for Kirk and Ruth gave him a claim. Finally, he held what was practically an official position in the family councils on the strength of being William Bannister Winfield's godfather. He loved William Bannister as a son. And it had been one of his favourite daydreams to conjure up a vision of the time when he should be permitted to undertake the child's physical training. He had toyed lovingly with the idea of imparting to this promising pupil all that he knew of the greatest game on earth. He had watched him in the old days, staggering about the studio, and had pictured him groaned his full strength, his muscles trained, his brain full of the wisdom of one who, if his mother had not kicked, would have been the middleweight champion of America. He had resigned himself to the fact that the infant's social status made it impossible that he should be the real White Hope, whom he had once pictured beating all comers in the roped ring. But after all, there was a certain mild fame to be acquired even by an amateur. And now that dream was over, unless Kirk could be goaded into strong action in time. Why don't you sneak the kid away somewhere, he suggested. Why don't you go right in at them and say, it's my kid and I'm going to take him away into the country out of all this white-tailed stuff and let him roll in the mud, same as he used to. Why say there's that shack of yours in Connecticut, just made for it? That kid would have the time of his life there. You think that's the solution, do you, Steve? I'm not sure it is. Steve's voice became more and more enthusiastic as the idea unfolded itself. Why, it ain't only a kid I'm thinking of. There's Miss Ruth. Say, you don't mind me pulling this line of talk? Go ahead, I began it. What about Miss Ruth? Well, you know just what's the matter with her. She's let the society game run away with her. I guess she started it because she felt lonesome when you were away. And now it's got her and she can't drop it. Or she wants a jolt. It would slow her up and show her just where she was. She's asking for it. One good snappy jolt would put the whole thing right. The first thing of jerking the kid away to Connecticut would be the right dope, believe me. Kirk shook his head. Wouldn't do, Steve. It isn't that I don't want to do it. But one must play by the rules. I can't explain what I mean. I can only say it's impossible. Let's think of a parallel case. When you were in the ring, there must have been times when you had a chance of hitting your man low. Why didn't you do it? It would have jolted him, all right? Why, I'd have lost on a foul. Well, so should I lose on a foul if I started the sort of rough house you suggest. I don't get you. Well, if you wanted plain English, Ruth would never forgive me. Is that clear enough? You did wrong, boss. Steve excitedly. I know her. I thought I did. Well, anyway, Steve, thanks for the suggestion. But believe me, nothing doing. And now, if you feel like it, I wish you would resume your celebrated imitation of a man exalting over the fact that he's wearing Middleton's undeniable. There isn't much more to do, and I should like to get through with it today, if possible. There, hold that pose. That's exactly right. The honest man gloating over his suspenders. You're to go on the stage, Steve. End of Chapter Six. Recording by Tim Bulkeley of BigBible.org. Book Two, Chapter Seven. Of their mutual child. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Recording by Tim Bulkeley of BigBible.org. Their mutual child by P.G. Woodhouse. Book Two, Chapter Seven. Cutting the Tangled Knot. There are some men whose mission in life appears to be to go about the world creating crises in the lives of other people. When there is thunder in the air, they precipitate the thunderbolt. Bailey Bannister was one of these. He meant extraordinarily well, but he was a dangerous man for that very reason. And in a properly constituted world, would have been segregated or kept under supervision. He would not leave the tangled lives of those around him to adjust themselves. He blundered in and tried to help. He nearly always produced a definite result, but seldom the one of which he aimed. That he should have interfered in the affairs of Ruth and Kirk at this time, was it must be admitted unselfish of him, for just now he was having troubles of his own on a somewhat extensive scale. His wife's extravagance was putting a strain on his finances, and he was faced with the choice of checking her or increasing his income. Being very much in love, he shrank from the former task and adopted the other way out of the difficulty. It was this that led to the change in his manner noticed by Steve. In order to make more money, he had had to take risks, and only recently had he begun to perceive how extremely risky these risks were. For the first time in its history, the firm of Bannister was making first-hand acquaintance with frenzied finance. It is perhaps a little unfair to lay the blame for this entirely at the door of Bailey's Sibyl. Her extravagance was largely responsible, but Bailey's newfound freedom was also a factor in the developments of the firm's operations. If you keep a dog, a dog with a high sense of his abilities and importance, tied up and muscled for a length of time, and then abruptly set it free, the chances are that it will celebrate its freedom. This had happened in the case of Bailey. Just as her father's money had caused Ruth to plunge into a whirl of pleasures which he did not really enjoy, merely for the novelty of it, so the death of John Bannister and his own consequent accession to the throne had upset Bailey's balance, and embarked him on an orgeous speculation quite foreign to his true nature. All their lives, Ruth and Bailey, had been repressed by their father, and his removal had unsteadied them. Bailey, on whom the shadow of the dead man had pressed particularly severely, had been quite intoxicated by sudden freedom. He'd been a cipher in the firm Bannister and Son. In the firm Bannister and Co. he was an untrammeled despot. He did that which was right in his own eyes, and there was no one to say him nay. It is true that veteran members of the firm, looking in the glass, found white hairs where no white hairs had been, and wrinkles on foreheads which, under the solid rule of old John Bannister, had been smooth. But it would have taken more than these straws to convince Bailey that the wind which was blowing was an ill wind. He had developed in a day the sublime self-confidence of a young Napoleon. He was all dash and enterprise, the hurricane-fighter of Wall Street. With these private interests to occupy him, it is surprising that he should have found time to take the affairs of Ruth and Kirk in hand. But he did. For some time he had watched the widening gulf between them with pain solicitude. He disliked Kirk personally, but that did not influence him. He conceived it to be his duty to suppress private prejudices. Duties him to call him to go to Kirk's aid and smooth out his domestic difficulties. What urged him to this course more than anything else was Ruth's growing intimacy with Basil Milbank. For in the period which it elapsed since the conversation recorded earlier in the story, when Kirk at first made the other's acquaintance, the gifted Basil had become an important and menacing figure in Ruth's life. To Ruth, as to most women, his gifts were his attraction. He danced well, he talked well, he did everything well. He appealed to a side of Ruth's nature which Kirk scarcely touched, a side which had only come into prominence in the last year. His manner was admirable. He suggested sympathy without expressing it. He could convey to Ruth that he thought her a misunderstood and neglected wife. While talking to her about the weather. He could make his own night-errant attitude toward her, perfectly plain, without saying a word, merely by playing soft music to her on the piano. For he had the gift of saying more with his fingertips than most men could have said in a long speech carefully rehearsed. Kirk's inability to accompany Ruth into her present life had given Basil his chance. Into the gap which now lay between them he had slipped with a smooth neatness, born of experience. Bailey hated Basil. Men as a rule did, without knowing why. Basil's reputation was shady without being actually bad. He was a suspect who had never been convicted. New York contained several husbands who eyed him as scants but could not verify their suspicions and the apparent hopelessness of ever doing so to Basil as a man who had carried smoothness into the realms of fine art. He was considered too gifted to be wholesome. The men of his set, being for the most part amably stupid, resented his cleverness. Bailey just at present was feeling strongly on the subject of Basil. He was at that stage of his married life when he would have preferred his civil to speak civilly to no other man than himself, and only yesterday Sybil had come to him to inform him with obvious delight that Basil Milbank had invited her to join his yacht party for a lengthy voyage. This had stung Bailey. He was not included in the invitation. The whole affair struck him as sinister. It was true that Sybil had never shown any sign of being fascinated by Basil, but he told himself there was no knowing. He forbade Sybil to accept the invitation. To soothe her disappointment he sent her off then and there to Tiffany's with a roving commission to get what she liked. For Bailey, the stern, strong man, the man who knew when to put his foot down was no tyrant. But he would have been indignant at the suggestion that he had bribed Sybil to refuse Basil's invitation. One of the arguments which Sybil had advanced in the brief discussion which had followed the putting down of Bailey's foot had been that Ruth had been invited and accepted, so why should not she? Bailey had not replied to this. It was at this point of the proceedings that the Tiffany motif had been introduced. But he had not forgotten it. He thought it over and decided to call upon Ruth. He did so. It was unfortunate that the nervous strain of being the Napoleon of Wall Street had had the effect of increasing to a marked extent the portentiousness of Bailey's always portentious manner. Ruth rebelled against it. There was an insufferable suggestion of ripe old age and fatherliness in his attitude which she found irritating in the extreme. All her life she had chafed at authority and now when Bailey set himself up as one possessing it she showed the worst side of herself to him. He struck this unfortunate note from the very beginning. Ruth, he said, I wish to speak seriously to you. Ruth looked at him with hostile eyes but did not speak. He did not know it, poor man. But he had selected an exceedingly bad moment for his lecture. It so happened that, only half an hour before, she and Kirk had come nearer to open warfare than they had ever come. It had come about in this way. Kirk had slept badly the night before and as he lay awake in the small hours his conscience had troubled him. Had he done all that was in him to do to bridge the gap in himself? That was what his conscience had wanted to know but the answer was in the negative. On the following day, just before Bailey's call he had accordingly sought Ruth out and rather nervously for Ruth made him feel nervous nowadays suggested that he and she and William Bannister should take the air in each other's company and go and feed the squirrels in the park. Ruth declined. It is possible that she declined somewhat curtly. The day was close and oppressive and she had a headache and a general feeling of ill-will towards her species. Also in her heart she considered that the scheme proposed smacked too much of Sunday afternoon domesticity in Brooklyn. The idea of papa, mama and baby sporting together in a public park offended her sense of the social proprieties. She did not reveal these thoughts to Kirk because she was more than a little ashamed of them. A year ago she knew and objected to the idea. A year ago such an expedition would have been a daily occurrence with her. Now she felt if William Bannister wished to feed squirrels Mammy was his proper companion. She could not put all this bold into Kirk so she placed the burden of her refusal on the adequate shoulders of Laura Elaine Porter. Aunt Laura, she said, would never hear of William Bannister wandering at large in such an unhygienic fashion upon which Kirk, whose patience was not so robust as it had been and who like Ruth found the day oppressive and making for irritability had cursed Aunt Laura heartily, given it as his opinion that between them she and Ruth were turning the child from a human being into a sort of spineless effeminate exhibit in a museum and had taken himself off to the studio muttering disjointed things. Ruth was still quivering with the indignation of a woman who has been cheated of the last word when Bailey appeared and announced that he wished to speak seriously to her. Bailey saw the hostility in her eyes and winced a little before it. He was not feeling altogether at his ease. He had had experience of Ruth in this mood and she had taught him to respect it but he was not going to shirk his duty he resumed I am only speaking for your own good he said nothing but thoughtlessness on your part but I am naturally anxious Bailey interrupted Ruth get to the point Bailey drew a long breath well then he said balked of his preamble and rushing on his fate I think you see too much of Basil Milbank Ruth raised her eyebrows oh the mildness of her tone deceived Bailey I do not like to speak of these things he went on more happily but I feel that I must it is my duty Basil Milbank has not a good reputation he is not the sort of man who are who in fact he has not a good reputation oh I understand that he's invited you to form one of his yacht party how did you know Sybil told me he invited her I refused to allow her to accept the invitation and what did Sybil say she was naturally a little disappointed of course but she did as I requested I wonder she didn't pack her things and go straight off my dear Ruth that's what I should have done you don't know what you're saying oh do you think I should let Kirk dictate to me like that he is certain to disapprove of your going when he hears the invitation what will you do Ruth's eyes opened for a moment she looked almost ugly what should I do why go of course she clenched her teeth a woman's mind can work curiously and she was associating Kirk with Bailey in what she considered an unwarrantable intrusion into her private affairs it was as if Kirk and not Bailey were standing there demanding that she should not associate with Basil Milbank I shall make it my business said Bailey to warn Kirk that this man was a desirable companion for you the discussion of this miserable yacht affair had brought back to Bailey all the jealousy which he had felt when Sybil had first told him of it all the vague stories he had ever heard about Basil were surging in his mind like waves of some corrosive acid he had become a leading member of the extreme wing of the anti-Milbank party he regarded Basil with an aversion which a dignified person might feel for a circling hawk and he was now looking on this yacht party as a deadly peril from which Ruth must be saved at any cost I shall speak to him very strongly he added Ruth's suppressed anger blazed up in a sudden way which before now had disconcerted her brother Bailey what do you mean by coming here and saying this sort of thing you're becoming a perfect old woman you spend your whole time prying into other people's affairs I'm sorry for Sybil Bailey cast one reproachable look at her and left the room with pain-dignity something seemed to tell him that no good could come to him from a prolongation of the interview Ruth in this mood had always been too much for him and always would be well he had done his duty as far as he was concerned and now it remained as though the same by Kirk he held a taxi and drove to the studio Kirk was busy and not anxious for conversation least of all with Bailey he had not forgotten their last tater-tates Bailey however was regarding him with a feeling almost of friendliness they were bound together by a common grievance against Basil Milbank I came here Winfield he said after a few moments of awkward conversation on neutral topics because I understand that this man Milbank has invited Ruth to join his yacht party what yacht party for this man Milbank is taking a party for a cruise shortly in his yacht who is Milbank surely you have met him yes he was at my house one night when you and Ruth dined there shortly after your return I don't remember him however it doesn't matter but why does the fact that he has asked Ruth on his yacht excite you are you nervous about the sea I dislike this man Milbank very much Winfield I think Ruth sees too much of him Kirk stiffened his eyebrows rose a fraction of an inch oh he said it seemed to Bailey for an instant that he had been talking all his life to people who raised their eyebrows and said oh but he continued manfully I do not think that Ruth should know him Winfield wouldn't Ruth be rather a good judge of that his tone but the man conscious of doing his duty acquires an artificial thickness of skin that he controlled himself but he had lost that feeling of friendliness of sympathy with a brother in misfortune which he had brought in with him I disagree with you entirely he said another thing went on Kirk if this man Milbank I still can't place him is such a thug or whatever it is he happens to be how did he come to be at your house the night you say I met him Bailey winced the world was not perpetually reminding him that Basil and Sibyl were on speaking terms Sibyl invited him I may say he has asked Sibyl to make one of the yacht party I absolutely forbade it but heavens what's wrong with a man he has a bad reputation has he indeed and I wish my wife to associate with him as little as possible and I should advise you to forbid Ruth to see more of him than she can help Kirk laughed the idea struck him as comic my good man I don't forbid Ruth to do things Bailey objecting to being called anyone's good man especially Kirk's permitted his temper to get the better of him then you should he snapped I have no wish to quarrel with you I came in here in a friendly spirit to warn you but I must say that for a man who married a girl as you married Ruth in direct opposition to the wishes of her family I make a curious view of your obligations Ruth has always been a headstrong impulsive girl and it is for you to see that she is protected from herself if you are indifferent to her welfare then all I can say is that you should not have married her you appear to think otherwise good afternoon he stalked out of the studio leaving Kirk uncomfortably conscious that he had had the worst of the argument Bailey had been officious no doubt and his pompous mode of expression was not soothing but there was no doubt that he had had right on his side marrying Ruth did involve obligations he had never considered her in that light but perhaps she was a girl who had to be protected from herself she was certainly impulsive Bailey had been right there if no one else who was this fellow Milbank who had suddenly sprung from nowhere into the position of a menace what were Ruth's feelings towards him Kirk threw his mind back to the dinner party at Bailey's and tried to place him was it the man yes he had it now it was the man with the wave of hair over his forehead the fellow who looked like a poet memory came to him with a rush he recalled his instinctive dislike for the fellow so that was Milbank was it he got up and put away his brushes there would be no more work for him that afternoon he walked slowly home the heat of the day had grown steadily more oppressive it was one of those airless stifling afternoons which afflicted New York in the summer do you remember seeing something about a record in the evening paper which he had bought on his way to the studio a whole column about heat and humidity it certainly felt unusually warm even for New York it was one of those days when nerves are strained when molehills become mountains and mountains are all everists he had felt it when he talked with Ruth about Bill and the squirrels and he felt it now he was conscious of being extraordinarily irritated not so much with any particular person as with the world in general the very vagueness of Bailey's insinuations against Basil Milbag increased his irresentment what a pompous ass Bailey was what a fool he had been to give Bailey such a chance of snubbing him what an extraordinarily futile and unpleasant world it was altogether he braced himself for the effort it was this heat which was making him magnified trifles Bailey was a fool probably there was nothing whatever wrong with this fellow Milbag probably he had some personal objection to the man and that was all and yet the image of Basil which had come back to his mind was not reassuring he had mistrusted him that night and he mistrusted him now what did he do? Ruth was not civil she was not the sort of woman a man could forbid to do things it would require tact to refuse Basil's invitation as he reached the door an idea came to him so simple that he wondered it had not occurred to him before it was perhaps an echo of his conversation with Steve he would get Ruth to come away with him to the shack in the Connecticut Woods as he dwelt on the idea the heat of the day seemed to become less oppressive and his heart leaped how cool and pleasant it would be out there they would take Bill with them and live the simple life again in the country this time instead of in town perhaps out there far away from the overcrowded city he and Ruth would be able to come to an understanding and bridge over that ghastly gulf as for his work he could do that as well in the woods as in New York and anyhow he had earned a vacation for days Mr. Penway had been hinting that the time had arrived for a folding of the hands Mr. Penway's views on New York and his record humidity were strong and crisply expressed his idea he told Kirk was that some sport with a heart should loan him a couple hundred bucks and let him beat it to the seashore before he melted in the drawing room Ruth was playing the piano softly as she had done so often at the studio Kirk went to her and kissed her a marked coolness in her reception of the kiss increased the feeling of nervousness which she had felt at the sight of her to him that they had parted that afternoon for the first time on definitely hostile terms he decided to ignore the fact something told him that Ruth had not forgotten but it might be that cheerfulness now would blot out the resentment of past irritability but in his embarrassment he was more than cheerful as Steve had been on the occasion of his visit to Old John Bannister he was breezy breezy with an effort that was as painful to Ruth as it was to himself breezy with a horrible musical comedy breeziness he could not have adopted a more fatal tone with Ruth at that moment all the afternoon she had been a complicated tangle of fretted nerves a quarrel with Kirk, Bailey's visit a conscience that would not lie down and go to sleep at her orders but insisted on running riot all these things had unfitted her to bear up amiably under sudden self-conscious breeziness and the heat of the day charged now with the oppressiveness of long overdue thunder completed her mood when Kirk came in and began to speak the softest notes of the human voice would have jarred upon her and Kirk in his nevousness was almost shouting his voice rang through the room and Ruth winced away from it like a stricken thing from out of the hell of nerves and heat and interfering brothers there materialized itself as she sat there a very vivid hatred of Kirk Kirk, meanwhile, uneasy but a little guessing at the fury behind Ruth's calm face was expounding his great scheme, his panacea for all the ills of domestic misunderstandings and parted lives Ruth, old girl! Ruth shuddered Ruth, old girl, I've had a bully-good idea it's getting too warm for anything in New York did you ever feel anything like it is today? why shouldn't you and I pop down to the shack and camp out there for a week or so we could take Bill with us just we three with somebody to do the cooking it would be great, what do you say? what Ruth said languidly was it's quite impossible it was damping but Kirk felt that at all costs he must refuse to be damped he clutched at his chieftainess and held it nonsense! he retorted why is it impossible? it's a great idea Ruth half hilly yawn she knew she was behaving abominably and she was glad of it it's impossible as far as I'm concerned I have a hundred things to do before I can leave New York well, I could do with a day or two clearing up a few bits of work I have on hand why couldn't we start this day week? it's out of the question for me about then I shall be on Mr. Milbank's yacht he's invited me to join his party the actual day is not settled but it will be in about a week's time oh! said Kirk Ruth said nothing have you accepted the invitation? I've not actually answered his letter I was just going to when you came in but you mean to accept it? certainly several of my friends will be there civil for one not civil I know Bailey has made some ridiculous objection to her going but I need to persuade her Kirk did not answer she looked at him steadily so Bailey did call on you this afternoon he told me he was going to but I hoped he would think better of it but apparently there are no limits to Bailey's stupidity yes, Bailey came to the studio he seemed troubled about this yacht party did he advise you to forbid me to go? well yes he did and now you've come to do it not at all I told Bailey that you were not the sort of woman one for bad to do things I'm not there was a pause all the same I wish you wouldn't go Ruth did not answer it'd be very jolly out of the shack Ruth shuddered elaborately and gave a little laugh would it? it's rather a question of taste personally I can't imagine anything more depressing and uncomfortable than being cooped up in a drafty frame house miles from anywhere there's no reason why you should not go though if you like that sort of thing of course you must not take Bill why not? Kirk spoke calmly enough but he was very near the breaking point all his good resolutions had vanished under the acid of Ruth's manner I shouldn't like him to rough it like that Aunt Laura would have a fit conditions being favorable it only needs a spark to explode a powder magazine and there are moments when a word can turn an outwardly calm and patient man into a raging maniac this introduction of Mrs. Porter's name into the discussion at this particular point broke down the last remains of Kirk's self-control for a few seconds his fury so mastered him that he could not speak then suddenly the storm passed and he found himself cool and venomous he looked at Ruth curiously it seemed incredible to him that he had ever loved her we had better get this settled he said in a hard quiet voice Ruth started she'd never heard him speak like this before she had not imagined him capable of speaking in that way even in the days when she had loved him most she had never looked up to him she had considered his nature weak and she had loved his weakness except in the case of her father she had always dominated the persons with whom she mixed she had taken it for granted that her will was stronger than Kirk's something in his voice now told her that she had underestimated him get what settled she asked and was furious with herself because her voice shook is Mrs. Porter the mother of the child or a you? what has Mrs. Porter to do with it? why should I ask her permission? how does it happen to be any business of Mrs. Porter's at all? Ruth felt baffled he was giving her no chance to take the offensive there was nothing in his tone which she could openly resent he was not shouting at her he was speaking quietly there was nothing for her to do but answer the question and she knew that her answer would give him another point in the contest even as she spoke she knew that her words were ridiculous Aunt Laura has been wonderful with him no child could have been better looked after I know she has used him as a vehicle for her particular form of insanity but that's not the point what I'm asking is why she was introduced at all I told you when you were away Bill nearly died I know I'm not forgetting that and naturally for a time you were frightened it is just possible that for the moment you lost your head and honestly thought that Mrs. Porter's methods were the only chance for him but that state of mind could not last all the time with you you are not a crank like your aunt you are a perfectly sensible level-headed woman you must have seen the idiocy of it all long before I came back why did you let it go on? Ruth did not answer I'll tell you why because it saved you trouble because it gave you more leisure for the sort of futile waste of time which seems to be the only thing you care for nowadays don't trouble to deny it do not think I haven't seen in these last few months that Bill bores you to death oh I know you always have some perfect excuse for keeping away from him it's too much trouble for you to be a mother to him so you hedge your conscience by letting Mrs. Porter pamper him and sterilize his toys and all the rest of it and try to make yourself think that you have done your duty to him you know that as far as anything goes that matters any tenement child is better off than Bill I you'd better let me finish what I've got to say I will be as brief as I can that is my case as regards Bill now about myself what do you think I am made of? I've stood it just as long as I could but you have tried me too hard I'm through heaven knows why it should have come to this it's not so very long ago that Bill was half the world to you and I was the other half now apparently there is not room in your world for either of us Ruth had risen she was trembling I think we better end this he broke in on her words end it? yes you're right one way or the other either go back to the old life or start a new one what we are living now is a horrible burlesque what do you mean? how start a new life? I mean exactly what I say in the life you are living now I am an anachronism I am a survival I'm out of dates and in the way you would be freer without me that's absurd is the idea so novel? is I married the only failure in New York? do you mean that we ought to separate? only a little more a very little more than we are separated now never see each other again instead of seeing each other for a few minutes every day it's not a very big step to take Ruth sat down and rested her chin on her hand staring at nothing Kirk went to the window and looked out over the park the sky was black in the room behind him the light had faded till it seemed as if night were come the wind was heavy and stifling a flicker of lightning came and went in the darkness over the trees he turned abruptly it is the only reasonable thing to do our present mode of life is a pass we are drifting further and further apart every day perhaps I have changed I know you have we are two strangers chained together we've made a model of it and the best thing we can do is to admit it I'm no good to you I have no part in your present life you're the queen and I'm just the prince consort the fellow who happens to be Mrs. Winfield's husband it's not a pleasant part to have to play and I've had enough of it we had better separate before we hate each other you have your amusements I have my work we can continue them apart we shall both be better off he stopped Ruth did not speak she was still sitting in the same attitude it was too dark to see her face it formed a little splash of white in the dusk she did not move Kirk went to the door I went up to say goodbye to Bill have you anything to say against that? and I shall say goodbye to him in my own way she made no sign that she had heard him goodbye, he said again the door closed up in the nursery Bill crooned to himself as he played on the floor Mammy sat in a chair sewing the opening of the door caused them to look up simultaneously hello? said Bill his voice was cordial without being enthusiastic he was glad to see Kirk but tin soldiers but tin soldiers and demanded concentrated attention when you're in the middle of intricate maneuvers you cannot allow yourself to be more than momentarily distracted by anything Mammy, said Kirk hoarsely go out for a moment will you? I shan't belong Mammy obediently departed later when Keggs was spreading the news of Kirk's departure in the servants' hall she remembered that his manner had struck her as strange Kirk sat down in the chair she had left and looked at Bill he felt choked there was a mist before his eyes Bill the child absorbed in his game did not look up Bill old man come here a minute I have something to say Bill looked up nodded moved a couple of soldiers and got up he came to Kirk's side his chosen mode of progression at this time was a kind of lurch he was accustomed to breathe heavily during the journey and on arrival at the terminus usually shouted triumphantly Kirk put an arm round him Bill stared up gravely into his face there was a silence from outside came a sudden rumbling crash Bill jumped Thunder he said in a voice that shook a little not afraid of thunder are you? said Kirk Bill shook his head stoutly Bill yes daddy Kirk fought to keep his voice steady Bill old man I'm afraid you won't see me again for some time I'm going away in a ship no not in a ship in a train perhaps take me with you daddy I'm afraid I can't Bill shall I ever see you again Kirk winced how direct children are what was it they called in the papers the custody of the child how little it said and how much it meant sight of Bill's wide eyes and quivering mouth reminded him that he was not the only person involved in the tragedy of those five words he pulled himself together Bill was waiting anxiously for an answer to his question there was no need to make Bill unhappy before his time of course you will he said trying to make his voice cheerful of course I will echoed Bill dutifully Kirk could not trust himself to speak again the old sensation of choking had come back to him the room was a blur he caught Bill to him in a grip that made the child cry out held him for a long minute then put him gently down and made blindly for the door the storm had burst by the time Kirk found himself in the street the thunder crashed and the giant spears of lightning flashed across the sky a few heavy drops heralded the approach of the rain and before he reached the corner it was beating down in torrents he walked on raising his face to the storm finding in it a curious relief a magical coolness had crept into the air and with it a strange calm into his troubled mind he looked back at the scene through which he had passed as at something infinitely remote he could not realize distinctly what had happened he was only aware that everything was over with that with a few words he had broken his life into small pieces to impatient to unravel the tangled knot he had cut it and nothing could mend it now why? the rain had ceased as a suddenly as it had begun the sun was struggling through a mass of thin cloud over the park the world was full of the drip and rush of water all that had made the day oppressive and strained nerves to breaking point had gone peace behind Kirk felt like one waking from an evil dream why did it happen? he asked himself what made me do it? a distant rumble of thunder answered the question End of Chapter 7 The Tangled Knot Reading by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org Book 2, Chapter 8 of their Mutual Child This is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information on the volunteer please visit LibriVox.org Recording by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org Their Mutual Child by P.G. Woodhouse Book 2, Chapter 8 Steve to the Rescue It is an unfortunate fact that when a powder magazine explodes the damage is not confined to the person who struck the match but extends to the innocent bystanders in the present case it was Steve Dingle who sustained the worst injuries of the others who might have been affected Mrs. Laura Delaine Porter was bomb-proof no explosion in her neighbourhood could shake her she received the news of Kirk's outbreak with composure privately in her eugenic heart she considered his presence superfluous now that William Bannister was safely launched upon his career in the drama of which she was the self-appointed stage director Kirk was a mere super supporting the infant star her great mind occupied almost entirely with the past and the future took little account of the present so long as Kirk did not interfere with her management of Bill he was at liberty so far as she was concerned to come and go as he pleased Steve could not imitate her admirable detachment he was a poor philosopher and all that his mind could grasp was that Kirk was in trouble and that Ruth had apparently gone mad the affair did not come to his ears immediately he visited the studio at frequent intervals and found Kirk there working hard and showing no signs of being passed through a crisis which had wrecked his life he was quiet it is true but then he was apt to be quiet nowadays probably if it had not been for Keggs he would have been kept in ignorance of what had happened for a time walking one evening up Broadway he met Keggs taking the air and observing the nightlife of New York like himself Keggs greeted Steve with enthusiasm he liked Steve and it was just possible that Steve might not have heard of the great upheaval he suggested a drink at a neighbouring saloon we have not seen you at our house lately Mr Dingle he remarked having pecked at his glass of beer like an old wise bird he looked at Steve with a bright eye somewhat puffy at the lids but full of life no said Steve that's right guess I must have been busy Keggs uttered a senile chuckle and drank more beer there rummins he went on I've been in some queer places but this beats them all what do you mean? inquired Steve as a second chuckle escaped his companion why it's come to an end things as Mr Dingle that's what I mean you won't have forgotten all about the pampering of that child what I told you of quite recent well it's been and come to an end yes continue Colonel this listens good you a dirt? not a word Keggs smiled a happy smile and sipped his beer it did the old man good finding an entirely new audience like this why? Mr Winfield was packed up and left Steve gasped left he cried not quit not gone for good for his own good I should say finds himself better off away from it all if you ask me but hadn't you really heard Mr Dingle God bless my soul I thought it was property by now a little bit of news why Mr Winfield hasn't been living with us for a matter of a week or more for the love of Mike I'm telling you the honest truth Mr Dingle two weeks ago come next Saturday Mr Winfield meets me in the hall looking wild and aroused it was the same day there was that big thunderstorm and he looks at me glassy like and says to me Keggs have my bag packed and my box is too I'm going away for a time I'll send a messenger for him and out he goes into the rain which begins to come down like cats and dogs the moment he was in the street I start to go out after him with his raincoat thinking he'd get wet before he could find a cab they've been so scarce in this city like London where you simply have to raise your hand and have a dozen flocking around you but he don't stop he just goes walking off through the rain and all and I get back into the house not wishing to be wetting myself on account of my rheumatism which is always troublesome in the damp weather and I says to myself hello hello hello what's all this see what I mean I could tell us plain as if I've been in the room with them that they had been having words and since that day he ain't been near the house and where he is now is more than I can tell you Mr Dingle why is it the studio where the studio is he I shouldn't wonder if he wasn't better off he didn't strike me as a man what was used to the ways of society he's happier where he is I expect and having some matters up in this philosophical manner Kegg's drained his glass and cocked an expectant eye at Steve Steve obeyed the signal and ordered a further supply of the beer for which Mr Kegg's had to plebeian and unbutler-like fondness his companion turned the conversation to the prospects of one of that group of inefficient middle-weights whom Steve so heartily despised between whom and another of the same degraded band a ten-round contest had been arranged and would shortly take place ordinarily this would have been a subject on which Steve would have found plenty to say but his mind was occupied with what he had just heard but he sat silent while the white-haired patron of sport opposite prattled on respecting current form Steve felt stunned it was unthinkable that this thing had really occurred Mr Kegg's sipping beer discussed the coming fight he weighed the alleged left hook of one principle against the much-advertised right-swing of the other he spoke with apprehension of a yellow streak which certain purists claimed to have discovered he had a gladiator on whose chances he proposed to invest his cash Steve was not listening to him a sudden thought had come to him filling his mind with the exclusion of all else the recollection of his talk with Kirk at the studio had come back to him he had advised Kirk as a solution of his difficulties to kidnap the child and take him to Connecticut well, Kirk was out of the running now but he, Steve, was still in it he would do it himself the idea thrilled him it was so in keeping with his theory of the virtue of the swift and immediate punch administered with the minimum of preliminary sparring there was a risk attached to the scheme which appealed to him above all, he honestly believed that he would achieve its object the straightening out of the tangle which Ruth and Kirk had made of their lives when once an idea had entered Steve's head he was tenacious of it he had come to the decision that Ruth needed what he called a jolt to bring her to herself much as a sleepwalker is aroused by the touch of a hand and he clung to it he interrupted Mr. Keggs in the middle of a speech touching his man's alleged yellow streak will you head home tonight, Colonel? he asked I certainly will, Mr. Dingle mind if I look in? I should be delighted I can offer you a cigar that I think you'll appreciate and we can continue this little chat to our leisure Mrs. Winfield's dining out and that their porter, thank God, has gone to Boston End of Chapter 9 Steve to the rescue read by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org Book 2, Chapter 9 At one in the morning William Bannister Winfield slept the peaceful sleep of childhood in his sterilized cot the light gleamed faintly on the white tiles it lit up the brass knobs on the walls the spotless curtains, the large thermometer an intruder, interested in these things would have seen by a glance at this last that the temperature of the room was exactly that recommended by doctors as the correct temperature for the nursery of a doctor the correct temperature for the nursery of a sleeping child no higher and no lower the transom over the door was closed but the window was open at the top to precisely the extent advocated by the authorities due consideration having been taken for the time of year and the condition of the outer atmosphere the hour was one in the morning childhood is a readily adaptable time of life and William Bannister, after a few days of blank astonishment after a very open mutiny had accepted the change in his surroundings and daily existence with admirable philosophy his memory was not far reaching and as time went on he began to accommodate himself to the new situation he had gradually forgotten the days of the studio as it was to be supposed he had forgotten the clouds of glory which he had trailed on his entry into this world if memories of past bear hunts among the canvases on the dusty floor ever came to him now he never mentioned it a child can weave romance into any condition of life in which fate places him and William Bannister had managed to interest himself in his present existence with considerable gusto scraps of conversation between Mrs. Porter and Mammy overheard and digested had given him a good working knowledge of the system of hygiene of which he was the centre he was vague as to the details but not vaguer than most people he knew that something called sterilising was the beginning and end of life and the things known as germs were the great peril he had expanded much thought on the subject of germs Mammy questioned could give him no more definite information than that they were things which got at you and hurt you and his aura of Mrs. Porter had kept him from going to the fountain head of knowledge for further data building on the information to hand he had formed in his mind an odd kind of anthropomorphic image of the germ he pictured it as a squat thick-set man of repellent aspect and stealthy movements who sneaked up on you when you were not looking and did unpleasant things to you selecting as the time for his attacks those nights when you would allow your attention to wonder while saying your prayers on such occasions it was Bill's practice to fool him by repeating his prayers to himself in bed after the official ceremony sometimes to make certain he would do this so often that he fell asleep in mid-prayer he was always glad of the nightlight a germ hates light preferring to do his scoundrelly work when it is so black that you can't see your hand in front of your face and the darkness presses down on you like a blanket occasionally a fear would cross his mind that the nightlight might go out but he never did being one of Mr. Edison's best electric efforts neatly draped with black veiling apart from this he had few worries certainly none serious enough to keep him awake he was sleeping now his head on his right arm a sterilized teddy bear clutched firmly in his other hand with the concentration of one engaged upon a feet at which he is an expert the door opened slowly a head insinuated itself into the room furtively as if uncertain of its welcome the door continued to open and Steve slipped in he closed the door as gently as he had opened it and stood there glancing about him a slow grin appeared upon his face to be succeeded by an expression of serious resolve for Steve was anxious he was still Steve's intention to remove steel, perloin and kidnap William Bannister that night but now that the moment had come for doing it he was nervous he was not used to this sort of thing he was an honest ex-middleweight not a burglar and just now he felt particularly burglarious the stillness of the house oppressed him he had not relished the long wait between the moment of his apparent departure and that of his entry into the nursery he had acted with simple cunning he had remained talking pugilism with kegs in the pantry till a prodigious yawn from his host had told him that the time was come for the breaking up of the party then begging kegs not to move as he could find his way out he had hurried to the back door opened and shut it and darted into hiding presently kegs yawning loudly had toddled along the passage bolted the door and made his way upstairs to bed leaving Steve to his vigil Steve's reflections during this period had not been of the pleasantest exactly what his explanation was to be if by any mischance he should make a noise and be detected he had been unable to decide finally he had dismissed the problem as insoluble and had concentrated his mind on taking precautions to omit any such noise so far he had succeeded he had found his way to the nursery easily enough having marked the location earnestly on his previous visits during the whole of his conversation with kegs in the pantry he had been repeating to himself the magic formula which began first staircase to the left turned to the right and here he was now at his goal and ready to begin but it was just this question of beginning which exercised him so grievously how was he to begin? should he go straight to the cart and wake the kid suppose the kid was scared and let out a howl a warm, prickly sensation about the forehead was Steve's silent comment on this reflection he took a step forward and stopped again he was conscious of tremors about the region of the spine the thought crossed his mind at that moment that burglars earned their money as he stood hesitating his problem was solved for him there came heavy sigh from the direction of the cart which made him start as if a pistol had exploded in his ear and then he was aware of two large eyes staring at him there was a tense pause a drop of perspiration rolled down his cheekbone and anchored itself stickily to the angle of his jaw it tickled abominably but he did not dare to move for fear of unleashing the scream which brooded over the situation like a cloud at any moment now a howl of terror might rip the silence and bring the household on the run and then the explanations a second drop of perspiration started out in the wake of the first the large eyes continued to inspect him they were clouded with sleep suddenly a frightened look came into the man and as he saw it Steve braced his muscles for the shock here it comes he said miserably to himself he searched in his brain for speech desperately as the best man at a wedding such as for that ring while the universe stands still waiting expectantly he found no speech the child's mouth opened Steve eyed him fascinated no bird encountering a snake was ever so incapable of movement as he are you a germ? inquired William Bannister Steve tottered to the cart and sat down on it the relief was too much for him gee kid he said you had my goat then I've got to hand it to you his sudden approach confirmed William Bannister's worst suspicions this was precisely how he had expected the germ to behave he shrank back on the pillow gulping why for the love of Mike said Steve don't you know me kid I'm not a porch climber don't you remember Steve who used to raise Hades with you at the studio darn it I'm your godfather I'm Steve William Bannister sat up partially reassured what Steve? he inquired I'm Steve why? how do you mean why? the large eyes inspected him gravely I remember he said finally well don't go forgetting kid I couldn't stand a second session like that you're Steve that's right stick to that work along fine I thought you were a germ a what? they get at you and hurt you who said so? Mammy are you scared of germs white hope not it gravely I have to be sterilized because of them are you sterilized? nobody ever told me so but say kid you don't want to be frightened of germs or microbes or bacilli or any of the rest of that circus you don't want to be frightened of nothing you're the white hope the bear cat that ain't scared of anything on earth what's this germ thing like anyway it's a I've never seen one but Mammy says they get at you and hurt you I think it's a big sort of ugly man that creeps in when you're asleep so that's why you thought I was one the white hope not it forget it said Steve Mammy is a queen alright believe me but she's got the wrong dope on this micro proposition you don't need to be scared of them anymore why some of me best pals are germs what's pals? why friends you and me are pals me and your pop are pals where's pop? he's gone away I remember he thought he needed to change of air don't you ever need to change of air I don't know well you do take it from me this is about the punkiest joint I ever was in you don't want to stay in a dairy kitchen like this what dairy kitchen this is all these white tiles and fixings makes me feel like a pint of milk to look at them it's because of the germs ain't I telling you the germs don't want to hurt you aren't Laura told Mammy they do say Carl you tell your aunt Laura to make a noise like an ice cream in the sun and melt away she's a prune and what she says don't go do you want to know what a germ or a microbe it's the same thing really is it's a fellow that has the best time you can think of they've been fooling you kid they saw you were easy so they handed it to you on a plate I'm the guy that can put you wise about microbes tell me sure well a microbe is a kid that just runs wild out in the country he don't have to hang around in a white-tiled nursery and eat sterilized junk and go to bed when they tell him to he has a spell time out in the woods, fishing and playing around in the dirt and going after bird's eggs and picking berries and oh shucks anything else you can think of wouldn't you like to do that William Bannister nodded well say as it happens there's a fine chance for you to be a germ right away I know a little place down in the Connecticut woods which would hit you right you could put it on overalls what overalls sort of clothes not like the fussed up scenery you have to wear now but the real sort of clothes which you can mess up and nobody cares a darn you can put them on and go out and tear up Jack like a regular kid all you want say don't you remember the fool stunts you and me used to pull off in the studio what studio gee you're a bit shy in your English ain't you it makes it sort of hard for a guy to keep up what you might call a flow of talk still you should worry why don't you remember where you used to live before you came to this joint big dusty sort of place where you and me used to play around on the floor the white hope nodded well wouldn't you like to do that again yes be a regular microbe yes Steve looked at his watch well that's like he said it happens to be exactly the right time for setting out to be one that's curious ain't it yes I've got a pal friend you know is he a germ sure he's waiting for me now in the automobile in the park why because I asked him to he owns a garage place where automobiles live you know I asked him to bring out a car and wait around nearby because I might be taking a pal of mine that's you for a ride in the country tonight course you don't have to come if you don't want to only it's mighty nice out there you can spend all tomorrow rolling about in the grass and listening to the birds I shouldn't wonder if we couldn't borrow a farmer's kid for you to play with there's lots of them around he could show you the best time you've had in months William Bannister's eyes gleamed the finer points of the scheme were beginning to stand out before him with a glowing clarity would I have to take my bib? he asked excitedly Steve uttered a scornful laugh no sir we don't wear bibs out there as far as William Bannister was concerned this appeared to settle it of all the trials of his young life he hated most his bib let's go Steve breathed a sigh of relief right squire we will he said but I guess you better leave her letter for Mammy so she won't be wondering where you've got to will Mammy be cross? harden your life she'll be tickled to death he scribbled a few lines on a piece of paper and left them on the cart from which William Bannister had now scrambled can you dress yourself? ah Steve oh yes it was an accomplishment of which the White Hope was extremely proud well go to it then Steve hello would it be a surprise for Mammy? you bet it will and she won't be the only one at that will mother be surprised? she sure will and pop you bet William Bannister chuckled delightedly ready? said Steve yes now listen we've got to get out of this joint as quiet as mice it would spoil the surprise if they were to hear us and come out and ask what we were doing get that? yes well see how quiet you can make it you don't want even to breathe more than you can help they left the room and crept down the stairs in the dark Steve lit a match and switched on the electric light he unbolted the door and peered out into the avenue close by under the tree stood an automobile its headlights staring into the night quick cried Steve he picked up the White Hope, closed the door and ran end of chapter nine of book two of Their Mutual Child by P. G. Woodhouse recording by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org chapter ten of book two of Their Mutual Child this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Tim Bulkley of BigBible.org Their Mutual Child by P. G. Woodhouse book two chapter ten accepting the gifts of the gods it was fortunate considering the magnitude of the shock which she was to receive that circumstances had given Steve's mammy unusual powers of resistance in the matter of shocks for years before her introduction to the home of the Windfield family her life had been one long series of crises she had never known what the morrow might bring forth though experience had convinced her that it was pretty certain to bring forth something agitating which would call for all her well-known ability to handle disaster this whole care of three small brothers and a weak-minded father gives a girl exceptional opportunities for cultivating poise under difficult conditions it had become second nature with mammy to keep her head though the heavens fell consequently when she entered the nursery next morning and found it empty she did not go into hysterics she did not even scream she read Steve's note twice very carefully then sat down to think what was her best plan of action her ingrained habit of looking on the bright side of things the result of a life which had pessimism in allowed to rule it might have ended prematurely with what the papers were fond of calling a rash act let her to consider first those points in the situation which she labelled in her meditations as bits of luck it was a bit of luck that mrs. Porter happened to be away for the moment it gave her time for reflection it was another bit of luck as she had learned from kegs whom she met on the stairs on her way to the nursery a mysterious telephone call had caused Ruth to rise from her bed some three hours before her usual time and depart hurriedly in a cab this also helped kegs had no information to give as to Ruth's destination or the probable hour of her return she had vanished without a word except a request to kegs to tell the driver of her taxi to go to the thirty-third street subway must write bad news kegs thought because she were looking white as a sheet mami was sorry that Ruth had had bad news but her departure certainly helped to relieve the pressure of an appalling situation with the absence of Ruth and mrs. Porter the bits of luck came to an end try as she would mami could discover no other silver linings in the cloud bank and even these ameliorations of the disaster were only temporary Ruth would return worse, mrs. Porter would return like two mother-hubbards they would go to the cupboard and the cupboard would be bare and to her mami would fall the task of explanation the only explanation that occurred to her was that Steve had gone suddenly mad he had given no hint of his altruistic motives in the hurried scrawl which she had found on the empty cot he had merely said that he had taken away William Bannister but that it was all right why Steve should imagine that it was all right baffled mami anything less all right she had never come across in a lifetime of disconcerting experiences she was aware that things were not as they should be between Ruth and Kirk and the spectacle of the broken home had troubled her gentle heart but she failed to establish a connection between Kirk's departure and Steve's midnight raid after devoting some ten minutes to steady brain work she permitted herself the indulgence of a few tears she did not often behave in this shockingly weak way her role in life hitherto having been that of the one calm person in a disrupted world when her father had lost his job and the rent was due and brother Jim had fallen in the mud to the detriment of his only suit of clothes and brothers Terence and Mike had developed respectively a sore throat and a funny feeling in the chest she had remained dried and capable her father had cried her brother Jim had cried her brother Terence had cried and her brother Mike had cried in a manner that made the weeping of the rest of the family seem like the uncanny stillness of a summer night but she had not shed a tear now however she gave way she buried her little face on the pillow which so brief a while before had been pressed by the round head of William Bannister and mourned like a modern Nehoby at the end of two minutes she rose sniffling but courageous herself again in her misery an idea had come to her it was quite a simple and obvious idea but till now it eluded her she would go round to the studio and see Kirk after all it was his affair as much as anybody else's and she had a feeling that it would be easier to break the news to him than to Ruth and Mrs. Porter she washed her eyes put on her hat and set out luck however was not running her way that morning arriving in the studio she rang the bell rang and rang again without result except a marked increase in her already substantial depression when it became plain to her that the studio was empty she desisted it is an illustration of her remarkable force of character but at this point refusing to be crushed by the bludgeoning of fate she walked to Broadway and went into a moving picture palace there was nothing to be affected by staying in the house and worrying so she resolutely declined to worry from this point onward her day divided itself into a series of three movements repeatedly at regular intervals from the moving pictures she went to the house on Fifth Avenue finding that neither Ruth nor Mrs. Porter had returned she went to the studio ringing the bell there and getting no answer she took in the movies once more Mammy was a philosopher the atmosphere of the Great House was still untroubled on her second visit the care of the White Home had always been left exclusively in the hands of the women and the rest of the household had not yet detected his absence it was not their business to watch his comings in and his goings out besides they had other things to occupy them the unique occasion of the double absence of Ruth and Mrs. Porter was being celebrated by a sort of Saturnalia or slaves holiday it was true that either or both might return at any moment but there was a disposition on the part of the domestic staff to take a chance on it Gags, that sinful butler, had strolled round to an apparently untenanted house on 41st Street where those who knew they in New York could, by giving the signal obtain admittance and the privilege of losing their money at the pleasing game of roulette with a double zero George the footman, in company with Henriette the ladies maid and Rowlands the chauffeur, who had butted in absolutely uninvited to George's acute disgust were taking the air in the park the rest of the staff, with the exception of a housemaid who had been bribed with two dollars and an old dress which had once been Ruth's and was now the property of Henriette to stand by the ship were somewhere on the island amusing themselves in the way that seemed best to them for all practical purposes it was a safe and sane forth provided out of a blue sky by the God of chance it was about five o'clock when Mammy, having at a modest estimate seen five hundred persecuted heroes, a thousand ill-used heroines several regiments of cowboys and perhaps two thousand comic men pursued by angry mobs returned from her usual visit to the studio this time there were signs of hope in the shape of a large automobile opposite the door she rang the bell and they came from within the sound of footsteps an elderly man of somewhat dissipated countenance opened the door I want to see Mr. Winfield, said Mammy Mr. Penway, for it was he, gave her the approving glance which your man of taste and discrimination does not fail to bestow upon youth and beauty and bawled over his shoulder Kirk! Kirk came down the passage he was looking brown and healthy he was in his shirt sleeves oh Mr. Winfield, I'm in such trouble why Mammy, what's the matter? come in Mammy followed him into the studio eluding Mr. Penway, whose arm was hovering in the neighbourhood of her waist sit down, said Kirk, what's the trouble? have you been trying to get at me before? we'd been down to Long Beach made a lightful spot observed Mr. Penway, who had followed sandy but replete with squabs why didn't you come earlier? we could have taken you may I talk privately with you, Mr. Winfield? sure Kirk looked at Mr. Penway who nodded agreeably outside for Robert he inquired amably very well there's no Bartinsky blood in the Penway family let me just fix myself a highball and borrow one of your cigars and I'll go and sit in the car and commune with nature take your time just a moment Mammy said Kirk when he had gone he picked up a telegram which day on the table I'll read this and see if it's important and then we'll get right down to business we only got back a moment before you arrived so I'm a bit behind with my correspondence as he read the telegram a look of astonishment came into his face he sat down and read the message a second time Mammy waited patiently good lord he muttered a sudden thought struck Mammy Mr. Winfield is it from Steve? she said Kirk started and looked at her incredulously how on earth did you know? good heavens are you in this Mammy too? Mammy handed him her note he read it without a word when he had finished he sat back in his chair thinking I thought Steve might have telegraphed you said Mammy Kirk roused himself from his thoughts was this what you came to see me about? yes what do they think of it up there? they don't know anything about it Mrs. Winfield went away early this morning Mr. Keg said she had had a telephone call Mrs. Porter is in Boston she will back to day sometime what are we to do? do? Kirk jumped up and began to paste the floor I'll tell you what I'm going to do Steve has taken the boy to my shack in Connecticut I'm going there as fast as the auto can take me Steve's mad you see Steve's the best pal I've got for two years I've been aching to get this boy and Steve has had the sense to show me the way he went on as if talking to himself Steve's a man I'm just a fool who hangs around without the nerve to act if I had the pluck of a rabbit I'd have done this myself six months ago but I've hung around doing nothing while that damn Porter woman played the fool with the boy I'll be lucky now if he remembers who I am he turned abruptly to Mermi Mermi you can tell them whatever you please when you get home they can't blame you it's not your fault tell them that Steve was acting for me with my complete approval tell them the kid's going to be brought up right from now on I've got him and I'm going to keep him Mermi had risen and was facing him a very determined midget pink and resolute I'm not going home Mr. Winfield what? if you're going to Bill I'm coming with you nonsense that's my place with him but you can't it's impossible no more impossible than what has happened already I won't take you then I'll go by train I know where your house is Steve told me it's out of the question Mermi's Irish temper got the better of her professional desire to maintain the discreetly respectful attitude of employee towards employer is it then we'll see do you think I'm going to leave you and Steve to look after my bill what do men know about taking care of children you would choke the poor might or let him kill himself a hundred ways she glared at him defiantly he glared back at her then his sense of humour came to the rescue she looked absurdly small standing there with her chin up and her fists clenched he laughed delightedly he went up to her and placed a hand on each of her shoulders looking down at her he felt that he loved her for her championship of Bill you're a brick Mermi of course you shall come we'll call the house and you can pack your grip but by George if you put that infernal thermometer in I'll run the automobile up against a telegraph pole and then Bill will lose us both finished? said a voice ah beg your pardon sorry Mr. Penway was gazing at them with affectionate interest from the doorway Kirk released Mammy and stepped back I only looked in and explained Mr. Penway I didn't mean to intrude I thought you might have finished your chat and it was a trifle lonely communing with nature well said Kirk you'll have to get on without me for a day or two make yourself at home you know where everything is I can satisfy my simple needs thinking of going away I've got to go up to Connecticut I don't know how long I shall be away take a time said Mr. Penway affably going in the auto yes weather's very pleasant for automobiling just now remarked Mr. Penway ten minutes later having thrown a few things together into a bag Kirk took his place at the wheel Mammy sat beside him the bag had the rear seat to itself there seems to be plenty of room still said Mr. Penway I've half a mind to come with you he looked at Mammy but on reflection my fans you can get along without me he stood at the door gazing after the motor as it moved down the street when turned the corner he went back into the studio and mixed himself a highball Kirk has managed to find him he said enviously end of chapter ten of part two recording by Tim Bulkley of bigbible.org book two chapter eleven of The Mutual Child this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information on the volunteer please visit LibriVox.org recording by Tim Bulkley of bigbible.org The Mutual Child by PG Woodhouse book two chapter eleven Mr. Penway on the Grill fate moves in a mysterious way luck comes hand-in-hand with misfortune what we lose on the swings we make up on the roundabouts if Keg had not seen twenty-five of his hard-earned dollars pass at one swoop into the clutches of the croupier at the apparently untempted house on 41st Street and become disgusted with the pleasing game of roulette he might have delayed his return to the house on Fifth Avenue till a later hour in which case he would have missed the remarkable and stimulating spectacle of Kirk driving to the door in an automobile with Mammy at his side of Mammy jumping out and entering the house of Mammy leaving the house with a suitcase of Kirk helping her into the automobile and of the automobile disappearing with its interesting occupants up the avenue at a high rate of speed having lost his money as stated and having returned home he was enabled to be a witness the only witness of these notable events and his best was filled with a calm joy in consequence this was something special this was exclusive a scoop he looked forward to the return of Mrs. Porter with an eagerness which earlier in the day he would have considered impossible somehow Ruth did not figure in his picture of the delivery of the sensational news that Mr. Winfield eloped with the young person engaged to look after her son Mrs. Porter's was one of those characters which monopolise any stage on which they appear besides, Keg's disliked Mrs. Porter and the pleasure of the prospect of giving her a shock left no room for other thoughts it was nearly seven o'clock when Mrs. Porter reached the house she was a little tired from the journey but in high good humour she had had a thoroughly satisfactory interview with her publishers satisfactory that is to say to herself the publishers had other views is Mrs. Winfield in? she asked Keg's when he admitted her Ruth was always sympathetic about her guerrilla warfare with the publishers she looked forward to a cosy chat in the course of which she would trace step by step the progress of the late campaign which had begun overnight and had culminated that morning in a sort of Gettysburg from which she had emerged with her arms full of captured flags and all the other trophies of conquest no ma'am said Keg's Mrs. Winfield has not yet returned Keg's was an artist in tragic narration he did not give away his climax he led up to it by degrees as slow as his audience would permit returned I did not know she intended to go away her yacht party is next week I understand yes ma'am where has she gone to Tuxedo ma'am Tuxedo Mrs. Winfield has just rung us up from there upon the telephone to request that necessaries for an indefinite stay be dispatched to her she is visiting Mrs. Bailey Bannister if Mrs. Porter had been Steve she would probably have said for the love of Mike at this point being herself she merely repeated the butler's last words if I may be allowed to say so madam I think there must have been trouble at Mrs. Bannister's a telephone call from her very early this morning for Mrs. Winfield which caused Mrs. Winfield to rise and leave in a taxi meter cab in an extreme hurry if I might be allowed to suggest it it is probably a case of serious illness Mrs. Winfield was looking very disturbed hmm said Mrs. Porter the exclamation was one of disappointment rather than apprehension sudden illnesses at the Bailey home did not stir her but she was annoyed that her recital of the squelching of the publishers would have to wait she went upstairs her intention was to look in at the nursery and satisfy herself that all was well with William Bannister she had given Mammy in specific instructions as to his care on her departure but you never knew perhaps her keen eye might be able to detect some deviation from the rules she had laid down it's detected at once the nursery was empty according to schedule the child should have been taking his bath she went downstairs again Keggs was waiting in the hall he had foreseen this return he had allowed her to go upstairs with his story but half heard because that appealed to his artistic sense this story to his mind was too good to be bolted as sitting it was the perfect serial Keggs Madam where is Master William? I fear I do not know Madam when did he go out? it is seven o'clock he should have been in an hour ago I have been making inquiries Madam and I regret to inform you that nobody appears to have seen Master William all day what? it not being my place to follow his movements I was unaware of this until quite recently but from conversation with the other domestics I find that he seems to have disappeared disappeared? a glow of enjoyment such as he had sometimes experienced when the ticker at the Cadillac Hotel informed him that the man he had backed in some San Francisco fight had upset his opponent for the count began to permeate Keggs disappeared Madam he repeated perhaps Mrs. Winfield took him with her to Tuxedo no Madam Mrs. Winfield was alone I was present when she drove away send Mammy to me at once said Mrs. Porter Keggs could have whooped with delight had not such an action seemed to him lightly to prejudice his chances of retaining a good situation he contented himself with wriggling ecstatically the young person is not in the house Madam not in the house what business has she to be out where is she I could not tell you Madam Keggs paused reluctant to deal the final blow as a child lingers lovingly over the last lick of ice cream in the cone I last saw her at about five o'clock driving off with Mr. Winfield in an automobile what? Keggs was content his climax had not misfired its staggering effect was plain on the face of his hero for once Mrs. Porter's poise had deserted her her one word had been a scream as she did not tell me her destination Madam went on Keggs making all that could be made of what was left of the situation after its artistic finish she came in and packed a suitcase and went out again and joined Mr. Winfield in the automobile and they drove off together Mrs. Porter recovered herself this was a matter which called for silent meditation not for chitchat with a garrulous butler that will do Keggs very good Madam Keggs withdrew to his pantry well pleased he considered that he had done himself justice as a raconteur he had not spoiled a good story in the telling Mrs. Porter went to her room and sat down to think she was a woman of action and she soon reached a decision the errant pair must be followed at once and at once her great mind playing over the situation like a searchlight detected a connection between this elopement and the disappearance of William Bannister she had long since marked Kirkdown as a malcontent and she now labelled the absent Mammy as a snake in the grass and she would feign submission to her rule while meditating all the time the theft of the child and the elopement with Kirk she placed the same construction on Mammy's departure with Kirk as had Mr. Penway showing it is not only great minds that think alike a latent conviction as to the immorality of all artists which would be one of the maxims of her late mother sprang into life she blamed herself for having allowed a nurse of such undeniable physical attractions as a member of the household Mammy's very quietness and apparent absence of bad qualities became additional evidence against her now Mrs. Porter arguing that these things indicated deep deceitfulness she told herself or was not the case that she had never trusted that girl but Laura Delaney Porter was not a woman to waste time in retrospection she had not been in her room five minutes before her mind was made up it was improbable that Kirk and his guilty accomplice had sought so near and obvious a haven as the studio but it was undoubtedly there that pursuit must begin she knew nothing of his way of living at that retreat but she imagined that he must have apportioned some successor to George Penicott as General Factotum and it might be that this person would have information to impart the task of inducing him to impart it did not dawn to Mrs. Porter she had a just confidence in her powers of cross-examination she went to the telephone and called up the garage where Ruth's automobiles were housed her plan of action was now complete if no information were forthcoming at the studio she would endeavour to find out where Kirk had hired the car in which he had taken Mammy away he would probably have secured it from some garage nearby but this detective work would be a last resource like a good general she did not admit the possibility of failing her first attack and luck being with her it happened that at the moment when she set out Mr. Penway feeling pretty comfortable where he was abandoned his idea of going out for a stroll along Broadway and settled himself to pass the next few hours in Kirk's arm chair Mr. Penway's first feeling when the bell rang rousing him from his peaceful musings was one of mild vexation a few minutes later when Mrs. Porter had really got to work upon him he would not have recognised that tepid emotion as vexation at all Mrs. Porter wasted no time she perforated Mr. Penway's spine with her eyes reduced it to the consistency of summer squash and drove him before her into the studio where she took a seat and motioned him to do the same for a moment she sat looking at him by way of completing the work of subjection while Mr. Penway writhed uneasily on his chair and thought of past sins my name is Mrs. Porter she began abruptly mine's Penway said the miserable being before her it struck him as the only thing to say I have come to enquire about Mr. Winfield as she paused Mr. Penway felt it had encumbered upon him to speak again Dear old Kirk he mumbled nothing of the kind said Mrs. Porter sharply Mr. Winfield is a scoundrel of the worst type and if you are an intimate friend of his as your words imply it does not argue well for your respectability Mr. Penway opened his mouth feebly and closed it again having closed it he reopened it and allowed it to remain ajar as it were it was his idea of being conciliatory tell me Mr. Penway started violently tell me when did you last see Mr. Winfield on a long beach together this afternoon in an automobile yes ah were you here when Mr. Winfield left again for the life of him Mr. Penway had not the courage to say no there was something about this woman's stare which acted hypnotically upon his mind never at its best as early in the evening he nodded there was a young woman with him pursued Mrs. Porter at this moment Mr. Penway's eyes roving desperately about the room fell upon the bottle of bourbon which Kirk's kindly hospitality had provided his emotions at the sight of it were those of a shipwreck mariner who sees a sail he sprang at it and poured himself out a stiff dose before Mrs. Porter's disgusted gaze he drained the glass and then turned to her a new man the noble spirit restored his own for the first time since the interview had begun he felt capable of sustaining his end of the conversation with ease and dignity how's that? he said there was a young woman with him repeated Mrs. Porter Mr. Penway imagined that he had placed her by this time here he told himself in his own crude language was the squab's mother camping on Kirk's trail with an axe Mr. Penway's moral code was of the easiest description his sympathies were entirely with Kirk fortified by the bourbon he set himself resolutely to the task of lying wholeheartedly on behalf of his absent friend no, he said firmly no, exclaimed Mrs. Porter no, repeated Mr. Penway with iron resolution no young woman, no young woman whatsoever I noticed it particularly because I thought it's strange don't you know? what I mean is don't you know? strange there shouldn't be how tragic is a man's fruitless fight on behalf of a friend for one short instant Mrs. Porter allowed Mr. Penway to imagine that the victory was his then she administered the coup de grace don't lie, you worthless creature she said they stopped at my house on their way while the girl packed a suitcase Mr. Penway threw up his brief there are moments when the stoutest hearted even under the influence of old bourbon realized that to fight on is merely to fight in vain he condensed his emotions into four words of all the chumps he remarked pouring himself out of further installment of the raw spirit he sat down a beaten man Mrs. Porter continued to harry him exactly, she said so you see there is no need for any more subterfuge and concealment I do not intend to leave this room until you have told me all you have to tell so you had better be quick about it kindly tell me the truth in as few words as possible if you know what is meant by telling the truth a belated tenderness for his dignity came to Mr. Penway you are insulting, he remarked you are, you are most insulting I meant to be, said Mrs. Porter crisply now tell me, where has Mr. Winfield gone? Mr. Penway preserved an offended silence Mrs. Porter struck the table a blow with a book which caused him to leap in his seat where has Mr. Winfield gone? how should I know? how should you know, because he told you I should imagine where has Mr. Winfield gone? Connecticut said Mr. Penway finally capitulating what part of Connecticut? I don't know I tell you I don't know he said I'm off to Connecticut and left suddenly struck Mr. Penway that his defeat was not as so overwhelming as he had imagined so you haven't got much out of me you see after all he added Mrs. Porter rose on the contrary she said I have got out of you precisely the information which I required an inconsiderably less time than I had supposed likely if it interests you I may tell you that Mr. Winfield has gone to a small house which he owns in the Connecticut woods then what? demanded Mr. Penway indignantly did you mean by keeping on saying what part of Connecticut? what part of Connecticut? because Mr. Winfield's destination has only just occurred to me she looked at him closely you are a curious and not uninteresting object Mr. Penway Mr. Penway started object lesson I should have said I should like to exhibit you as a warning to the youth of this country what? from the look of your frame I should imagine that you are once a man of some physique your shoulders are good even now a rigorous course of physical training might save you I have known more helpless cases saved by firm treatment you have allowed yourself to deteriorate as much as a man named Penicott who used to be employed here by Mr. Winfield I saved him I dare say I can make something of you I can see at a glance that you eat, drink and smoke too much you could not hold out your hand now at this minute without trembling I could so Mr. Penway indignantly he held it out and it quivered like a tuning fork there so Mrs. Porter calmly what do you expect? you know your own business best I suppose but I should like to tell you that if you do not become a teetotaler instantly and begin taking exercise you will probably die suddenly within a very few years personally I shall bear the calamity with fortitude good evening Mr. Penway for some moments after she had gone Mr. Penway sat staring before him his eyes wore a glassy look his mouth was still a jar damn woman he said at length he turned his meditations damn impertinent woman another interval for reflection and he spoke again damn impertinent interfering woman that he reached out for the bottle of bourbon and filled his glass he put it to his lips then slowly withdrew it damn impertinent into my wonder there was a small mirror on the opposite wall he walked unsteadily toward it and put out his tongue he continued in this attitude for a time then with increased ejection turned away he placed a hand over his heart this seemed to depress him still further finally he went to the table took up the glass poured its contents carefully back into the bottle which he corked and replaced on the shelf on the floor against the wall was a pair of Indian clups he picked these up and examined them owlishly he gave them little tentative jerks finally with the air of a man carrying out a great resolution he began to swing them he swung them in slow irregular sweeps his eyes the while still glassy staring fixedly at the ceiling End of chapter 11 Recording by Tim Bulkley of bigbible.org