 The Jell-O program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston and Phil Harris and his orchestra. The orchestra opens the program with who put that moon in the sky. It's grand to go to market these days when fresh fruits and vegetables are so plentiful and so reasonable. And it's even grander to bring them home and serve them in tempting combinations with Jell-O. For Jell-O makes such appealing desserts, either plain or with the addition of fresh fruit. And Jell-O makes such cool, tempting salads too. Since summertime is salad time, here are a few salads that you can make with Jell-O. Fresh peas, carrots, and cauliflower in a mold of shimmering lemon Jell-O served on crisp lettuce. Threaded cabbage, thin cucumber slices, and celery molded into lime Jell-O is another swell vegetable combination. Melon balls and orange slices in orange Jell-O makes a glorious fruit salad. Save and those few people who say they don't like salads, change their tune when your salad is made with Jell-O. Jell-O is such a help with hot weather menus that you want to call on it often for desserts and salads. But whether you serve Jell-O for dessert or salad, always be sure you get the real thing. Genuine Jell-O. Ladies and gentlemen, for his final voyage of the season, we bring you that worn out captain of the good ship Jell-O, Jack Benny. Well, Jell-O again, this is your old skipper steaming into port, chug chug. Well, down this is our last broadcast. The last time this season we'll be together. Kind of sad, isn't it? Yes, Jack. It is. Yep. And when you said I was worn out, you hit it. I tell you, Don, I'm so exhausted from the strain of broadcasting, well, I can hardly stand up. Well, you look all right, Jack. You seem to be standing there very firm and erect. Well, that's because the laundry puts a lot of starch in my underwear. Weren't for that, I'd crumple. You would? Well, now let me ask you something, Jack. Why should you be so tired? Why should I? Well, that's about the silliest question I've ever heard. Really, that is positively redick. No, really, that is the epitome of, of, well... Well, why? Epitome threw me there again. Bill, did you hear what Don just asked me? Sure. Why should you be so tired? Why? Do you realize what 39 weeks in radio takes out of a man? Well, you take something out of radio, don't you? That's not the point. That doesn't tire me. It's those weeks of hard-grinding labor. Labor? Do you call what you do labor? Well, I don't know what else you'd call it. Now, look here, Jack. You only do one broadcast a week, don't you? Yes, but I... That runs a half hour. I know, but I read more lines than anyone else on the program. We can't help it if you're a pig. Now, look here, Phil. And furthermore, out of the half hour, we do 15 minutes of music and song, don't we? Yes, but... And I take two minutes more to talk about Jell-O. I know, fellas. So, Mr. Tilly, the toiler, that leaves you exactly 13 minutes of work every week. Imagine. 13 minutes. Well... 13 is unlucky, and you know it. Hmm. Wait a minute, Jack. We weren't talking about superstition. Well, we are now. I wish you two would stick to the subject. Hey, what's all the excitement? Oh, these guys. Hello, Kenny. What's the matter? Oh, Jack's complaining because he has to work 13 minutes a week. Oh, yeah? Where's he working? Right here, and so are you. For your information, Kenny, being on this program is very hard work. You're fooling. I am not. You're crazy. Well, I can't discuss business now. I'll think it over. You'd better make it quick. I'm getting smart. Oh, you are, eh? Well, there's an item for Ripley. I am not. Hello, Jack. Hello. Well, Mary, this is our last program of the season. Are you glad? Yeah. Gee, I'm so tired and worn out. I thought I'd never get here today. You see, fellas? You see what broadcasting does to you? Not bad. I was at the Trocadero last night. Oh. Well, that's play. I'm tired from overwork. We've proved that you do very little work on the radio. Jack, so stop complaining. Now, wait a minute, Don. What about my working pictures? I forgot to mention that. That's mighty wide of you. Well, how about that last picture I just finished where I had to get in and out of a barrel for hours and hours? I suppose that doesn't wear y'all. The barrel didn't look good either. You wouldn't think of that, Kenny. Isn't he dumb, Mary? I'll say. He's a regular Charlie McCarthy with blood. Congratulations. Congratulations. Yes, sir. That's the best description yet. And how? There's one thing about Kenny. He appreciates everything. Come in. Oh, now come in. Well, it's our last program, folks. How do you buck? Hello, Andy. Hello. Nice of you to drop in on our last broadcast. Yep. I come over to get my diploma. Well, you deserve one. But tell me, Andy, have you enjoyed working with us this past season and being one of our gang? Sure have. And say, buck, do you remember the first time I joined your program? I certainly do. Why, what are you laughing at? Remember how funny my voice used to sound? Yes, yes. But that's a long time ago, Andy. What'd you do to cure it? What a change. What a change. Tell me, Andy, what did you do to improve your voice? I've been taking singing lessons. Me, me, me, me, me, me, me. Have you got a good teacher, Andy? Well, pretty good, but shucked. I'm still a long ways from the metropolitan. Well, Andy, what you need is a good rest like I do. I'm going to take a nice long vacation. Where are you going, buck? Well, first I'm going to visit my hometown, Warkegan, and then I'm going to take a trip to Europe. Europe, huh? Yes, sir. Come here. I'll tell you all about it while Phil plays a number. I'll tell you, Andy, when... Come in. Mr. Benny? Yes? I want to take this opportunity of wishing you a very, very happy trip to Europe. Well, thanks. Say, who are you? The Queen Mary Chug-Chug. I'd like to bump him into a dog. Play, Phil. This king played by Phil Harris and his international musicians. You know, folks, he's got a man in his band from every country, but this one. Now, wait a minute, Jack. My boys are all Americans. Oh, football players. I've been suspecting that right along. Well, Phil, just the same, I'm going to miss them. I sure am. You know, you won't be playing many more numbers this season, will you? Telephone or musical? Well, I'm not interested in your phone numbers. Say, I do all right myself. Don't I, Mary? No. Oh, yeah? Listen, I got the number of a girl last night who lives right on the same street as Carol Lombard. I bet she's a mess. Is that so? Lombard is beautiful, and you know it. I wasn't talking about Carol Lombard. Oh, I suppose she's not good enough for you. Well, listen, Carol Lombard is about the loveliest. Quiet, you two punks. Who was that? Clark Gable. Oh. I wish he'd stay home or I'd shut up. You know, that guy Gable swings a mighty wicked right. He can swing it around me anytime he wants to. Well, I think we better talk about something else. Yes, I think so too. Say, Jack, have you decided where you're going on your vacation? Yes, Don. I finally made up my mind. I'm going to Europe. To Europe? Yes. That's about 5,000 miles from Carol Lombard's house then. Roughly. What do you mean roughly? Gable just pushed me. Why don't you push him back? Because I want to go to Europe and shut up. Now, let's talk about something else. I don't care. I'm not in it anyway. Quiet. You know, Don, before I take my vacation, Mary and I are going down to Dallas, Texas to appear at the Pan-American Exposition. Nice of them to invite us, wasn't it? Yes, it certainly was, Jack. When are you going to be there? July 3rd, 4th, and 5th. Said he, not realizing it was a plug. There's going to be big doings down there. But Texas is a real he-man state. What do they want with a guy like you? Now, listen, partner, Sheriff Buck Benny is mighty well-known down Dallas way. He's going to give me a real rootin' tootin' western reception. Is that so? Yes, sir, and believe me, all can take it. Exceptin' for one thing. What's that? If they ask me to get on a horse, I'll die. Jack? No, kid. Jack, are you really afraid of riding a horse? It's not the riding so much, Don. It's the results, you know. Yeah, every time Jack gets on a horse, he has a hip hangover. Now that's a lie. Say, Jack, when we get down there, I hope I meet a nice cowboy. Oh, you probably will, Mary. I hope he's good-looking and he likes me. He will. Say, there's nobody as romantic as a Texas cowboy. Oh, Betty, ask me to go out with him. Oh, sure, sure. Wow! What happened? He just kissed me. Now that's over. Now you don't have to go to Texas. I do, too. I want another one. Get ready, Texas. Say, Buck! Yes, Andy? When you get down to Dallas, I wish you'd look up my Aunt Florabell. Your Aunt Florabell? Is she down there? Yeah. She lives all alone and she's the sweetest little old lady you ever met. Well, I'll sure look her up. What does she do, Andy? She's a blacksmith. Oh, she runs a nag bootery. Is that it? Well... Yeah, you ought to see her give a horse the hot foot. Well, that'll be a treat. I'll sure look her up. Oh, Jack, I got an Aunt in Montreal. In Montreal? Well, I'm going to Dallas. She don't care. And don't waste my time with a lot of nonsense. Every time you open your mouth, you take up a minute of nothings. Smile when you say that, partner. What? There goes my race. You said it. Jack, if you're going to Dallas, when do you intend to leave for Europe? Right afterwards, Don. And by the way, what are you going to do this summer? Well, first, I'm going to make a picture for Universal. Oh, you too, huh? Yes, and I won't be in a barrel. You would if you could get in one. Well, Don, that won't keep you busy all summer. What else are you going to do? Oh, I'm just going to stick around here and figure out some new ways of telling people about Jell-O. Well, that's an idea, but after all, how many ways can you say strawberry, raspberry, cherry, orange, lemon, and lime? Well, I thought that maybe next year I could say it backwards like this, lime, lemon, orange, cherry, raspberry, and strawberry. Yes, that'll be a change. I'd never recognize it. And another thing, Don, if you want a radical change, instead of saying, look for the big red letters on the box, say look for the large red letters. Say that's great. Sure. I know another switch he can make, Jack. What, Mary? Instead of saying Jell-O is twice as good as ever before, he can say Jell-O is tweets as good as ever before. Tweets? What does that mean? I don't know. There goes my raise, too. I'll remember that. Say, Don, I've got another idea. Sing, Kenny. Now, look, Don, if you mention that it's economical. Kenny Baker's singing, here comes a Sandman from his new picture, Mr. Dodd Takes the Air. And, Kenny, I'll bet you're glad it's all over for a while, huh? Oh, I don't know. Where are you going on your vacation? Well, I got a new car, so I think I'll drive to Honolulu. Honolulu? I can try. Yes, yes, you can try. You better take plenty of towels. Well, I'm pretty blue today. You know, I don't know how you fellas feel about it, but I think it's a shame for this gang to break up. I mean, even for the summer, you know? Yeah. Gee, we've been together all these weeks, and... you know, I don't know, we've been so happy and congenial. I mean, it hasn't been just a cold-blooded business arrangement on our part. Has it failed? No, I haven't made a dime all year. That's what I mean. It's deeper than that. It's not a question of dollars and cents and raises and salaries. Gee, with our little group, it's more like, I'm the father, and we're all one little happy family. What are you laughing at? Where do we live in Scotland? Oh, you. I don't know, fellas. You know, we've... we've been together 39 weeks, and yet it seems like a dream. Gee, like, like something that never really happened. Something that didn't exist at all. But it did, didn't it? Don't look at me! Oh, maybe I'm just a sentimental old fool. Yeah. But after all, we've, you know, we've been such pals, such friends. Oh, I don't know. Life is funny, isn't it? We're here, we're there. And yet, where are we? Last time I heard we were in Scotland. Oh. There's certainly a lot of sentiment in this troupe. Say, fellas, you know what we ought to do, this being our last program, let's tear up our scripts and make it a little informal party. You know, just a little fun among ourselves. What do you say? Put one! Candy, if you don't behave, I'll pull up your kilties and give you a good spanking. No kidding, fellas. What do you say? Okay, that's what we do. Mary, look, Mary, how about you singing a song? I will if Andy stays out of it. That's an insult. I sang with Crosby. Well, Crosby can take it. Come on, Mary, sing a song. Yeah, come on, Mary. Yeah, what's it gonna be, Mary? I'll sing the love bug if you don't watch out. You'll sing it if we don't watch out. All right, Mary, we'll all join in. You know, a kind of a vocal amulet. Let's go, hit it, Phil. The love bug will bite you if you don't watch out. And if he ever bites you, then you'll sing and shout. You'll go here, come to buy. That's what love is all about. The love bug will bite you if you don't watch out. And if he ever bites you, then you'll sing and shout. You'll go little old lady passing by. That's what love is all about. You can't eat, you can't sleep, you'll go crazy. You'll just la-di-da-di-da all day. If someone wants to know why you're crazy, you'll answer. I'm a little touched in the head. The love bug will bite you if you don't watch out. And if he ever bites you, then you'll sing and shout. You'll go way down upon the Swarney River. That's what love is all about. You can't eat, you can't sleep, you go crazy. You'll just la-di-da-di-da all day. If someone wants to know why you're crazy, you'll answer. Let him settle. You don't watch out. And if he ever bites you, then you'll sing and shout. You'll go... Ro-ro-ro-ro-ro Ro-ro-ro-ro-ro Yellow, yellow, six full bar. That wasn't that good, fellas. Don't you feel happier? You see? Hmm, you can't do anything to please this gang. Come in. Hey. Well, well, Johnny Green. Hello, Jack and Mary. Well, if you all know Johnny Green, who used to be with us. Sure, hi. Johnny, I want to congratulate you on the nice job you're doing on your summer show. Thanks, Jack. And by the way, I brought over that arrangement you asked for to you. Want to go through with it? Sure I do. What is it, Jack? Yeah, where do you got up your sleeve, Buck? Well, I'll tell you fellas, it's sort of a surprise. I've been practicing my violin for the past 10 weeks, and it's a secret. Even my neighbors don't know it. They think it's the lawnmower. Yeah. They do not. Anyway, I've been rehearsing and rehearsing, and Johnny made a special violin arrangement of a number he wrote called Body and Soul, and he's going to accompany me, aren't you, Johnny? Yes, sir. And here's a copy of the music. Thanks. Gee, these notes look kind of difficult. That's the title page, open it. Oh. Oh. Yes. Gee, now it is difficult. Well, look at that jungle of notes there. Say, Jack, have you got a piano here? A piano? That thing over there in the corner is an a pool table. It isn't. No. It's a piano player. That's what he talked me out of. Well, let's cut out the kidding. Do you want to hear me play the violin or not? Yes, Jack. Come on. Come on. All right. Bring me my fiddle, Mary. Okay. I haven't got a conscience anyway. No. You don't have to worry. Well. Are you ready, Johnny? Yes. But, look, Jack, when you come to that first crescendo, be sure and start out fortissimo and very stringendo bowing. I see. I see. Yes. And then you grate off to a slight smortando. To a slight smortando there, Mary. Well, shouldn't I arpeggio a bit? That's irrelevant. Oh, you're a lawyer, too. Well, well, all right. Let's get started. Now, quiet, everybody. Quiet. Quiet! Thanks. Now, Johnny, be on the alert because as a rule, you see, when I play a violin solo, I improvise quite a bit. Just play this one the way it's written. I'll show off. The way you talk, you think this was your program. When you get through playing, anybody can have it. All right, let's go on with it. I pick out the worst guest stars, don't I, folks? And now, ladies and gentlemen, with your kind attention for the feature attraction of our last program of the season, I will play Body and Soul, written by Johnny Green, and especially arranged as a violin solo for me. I'm a little bit out of tune there, I think. Johnny, give me A, will you? That's pretty close there, huh? All right, Johnny, Body and Soul. Now, you play something, Johnny. Ladies and gentlemen, that was a violin solo played by Johnny Green at the piano. But it wasn't bad at that. How did you like it, fellas? And you talk about my singing play, Phil! Homemade ice cream is a summer dessert that everybody enjoys. And here's a new way to make it. Use jello ice cream powder and make richer, smoother ice cream right at home. And here's a more economical way to make the best homemade ice cream you ever tasted, too. For with jello ice cream powder, you actually use less cream and get more ice cream. One package of jello ice cream powder, some milk, cream, and sugar makes a quarter-and-a-half of velvety, rich ice cream. Twice as much as most other such ice cream preparations you can buy. And what ice cream jello ice cream powder makes. Mellow and creamy with that wonderful old-fashioned homemade flavor. You make it right in the freezing trays of your refrigerator, or you can use an ordinary hand to freeze it, and the results will be just as good. Jello ice cream powder comes in five flavors. Rich chocolate, real vanilla, strawberry, lemon, and maple. And there's unflavored, too, so that you can make any other flavor you found of. Serve ice cream made this better way for dessert soon. Putter and assortment of jello ice cream powder flavors from your grocer tomorrow. Last number of the last program in the present jello series, and we'll be with you again on Sunday night, October 3rd, with the same old gang. Thanks so much, Johnny, for coming up. You're welcome, Jack. In the meantime, I know you're going to enjoy the jello summer program, which starts next Sunday, starring lovely Jane Froman, and including Freddie Lightner, Don Ross, and the music of Dartiga. Say, Buck, that sounds like a mighty fine lineup. Do you think there's a chance of squeezing me in there for a couple of hot courses a week? No, no, Andy, but I'll tell you what you can do. You can listen to the program. Okay, Buck, if I can't horn in, I'll tune in. Well, that's great. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I'd like to take this opportunity of thanking all of my listeners for their splendid support, my cast, and also the readers of Radio Guide for again making it possible for me to win the 1937 poll. I also want to thank my authors, Bill Morrow and Ed Beloin, who work with me on the preparation of my material. Mary, do you want to thank anyone? Well, if that cowboy in Texas is listening in, thanks in advance. Good night, folks, and a happy summer day. J-E-L-L Next week for the Jello Summer Program, starring Jane Froman with Freddie Lightner, Don Ross, and the music of Dartiga. The Jello Program will come to you from Hollywood over the red network of a nice little broadcasting company.