 Stories and content in Weird Darkness can be disturbing for some listeners and is intended for mature audiences only. Parental discretion is strongly advised. Welcome, Weirdos! I'm Darren Marlar and this is Weird Darkness. Here you'll find stories of the paranormal, supernatural, legends, lore, the strange and bizarre, crime, conspiracy, mysterious, macabre, unsolved and unexplained. If you're new here, welcome to the show and while you're listening, be sure to check out WeirdDarkness.com for merchandise, to visit sponsors you hear about during the show, sign up for my newsletter and our contests. Connect with me on social media. Plus, you can visit the Hope in the Darkness page if you're struggling with depression or dark thoughts. You can find all of that and more at WeirdDarkness.com. Coming up in this episode, it's Thriller Thursday where I bring you a story of fiction and tonight it's the short story by Daniel Keys, Flowers for Algernon, that became so popular it was later turned into a full novel and then eventually made its way to movie screens. The short story was written in 1958 and first published in the April 1959 issue of the magazine of fantasy and science fiction and was so loved that it won the Hugo Award for Best Short Story in 1960. Algernon is a laboratory mouse who has undergone surgery to increase his intelligence. The story is told by a series of progress reports written by Charlie Gordon, the first human subject for the surgery, and it touches on ethical and moral themes such as the treatment of the mentally disabled. Although the book has been challenged for removal from libraries in the United States and Canada, sometimes successfully, it's frequently taught in schools around the world and has been adapted many times for television, theatre, radio, and as the Academy Award-winning film, Charlie. Honestly, I don't see any reason this should be banned anywhere. It's brilliantly written and aside from one off-color word used to describe Caucasians, which may bother some people, I personally don't find anything offensive in it. I'll admit I did find it challenging to bring some of the areas of the book into audio form, especially with the intentionally misspelled words, but hopefully the slower reading and more lazy pronunciation I used in those sections helps to convey that message. And when Charlie begins using punctuation, I do for a very short moment read the punctuation marks as well, as it was the only way I could think of to make it known what was being written. Now, bolt your doors, lock your windows, turn off your lights, and come with me into the Weird Darkness, August 1, March 5, 1965. Dr. Strauss says, I should write down what I think and everything that happens to me from now on. I don't know why, but he says it's important, so they'll see if they will use me. I hope they use me. Ms. Kenian says, maybe they can make me smart. I want to be smart. My name is Charlie Gordon. I'm 37 years old, and two weeks ago was my birthday. I have nothing more to write now, so I will close for today. Progress Report 2, March 6. I had a test today. I think I failed it, and I think it made me now that won't use me. What happened is a nice young man was in the room. He had some white cards with ink spilled all over him. He said, Charlie, what do you see on this card? I was very scared, even though I had my rabbits foot in my pocket, because when I was a kid, I always failed tests in school, and I spilled ink, too. I told him I saw an ink block. He said, yes, and made me feel good. I thought that was all, but when I got up to go, he stopped me. He said, now, sit down, Charlie. We're not through yet. Then I don't remember so good, but he wanted me to say what was in the ink. I didn't see nothing in the ink, but he said there was pictures there. Other people saw some pictures. I couldn't see any pictures. I really tried to see. I held the card close up and then far away. Then I said, if I had my glasses, I could see better. I usually only wear my glasses in the movies or TV, but I said they're in the closet in the hall. I got them. Then I said, let me see that card again. I bet I'll find it now. I tried hard, but I still couldn't find the pictures. I only saw the ink. I told him maybe I need new glasses. He wrote something down on a paper, and I got scared of failing the test. I told him it was a very nice ink blot with little points all around the edges. He looked very sad, so that wasn't it. I said, please, let me try again. I'll get it in a few minutes, because I'm not so fast sometimes. I'm slow reader too, Miss Kenyan's class for slow adults, but I'm trying very hard. Gave me a chance with another card that had two kinds of ink spilled on it, red and blue. It was very nice. Talked slow like Miss Kenyan does, and he explained it to me that it was a raw shock. He said people see things in the ink. I said, show me where. He said, think. I told him I think, ink blot, but that wasn't right either. He said, what does it remind you? Pretend something. I closed my eyes for a long time to pretend. I told him I pretended a fountain pen with ink leaking all over a tablecloth, and it got up and went out. I don't think I passed the raw shock test. Progress Report 3, March 7. Dr. Strauss and Dr. Niemer say it don't matter about the ink blots. I told him I didn't spill the ink on the cards and I couldn't see anything in the ink. They said that maybe they will still use me. I said Miss Kenyan never gave me tests like that one, only spelling and reading. They said Miss Kenyan told that I was her bestest pupil in the adult night school because I tried the hardest and I really wanted to learn. They said, how come you went to the adult night school all by yourself, Charlie? How did you find it? I said I asked people and somebody told me where I should go to learn to read and spell good. They said, why did you want to? I told them because on my life I wanted to be smart and not dumb. But it's very hard to be smart. They said, you know, it'd probably be temporary. I said yes. Miss Kenyan told me I don't care if it hurts. Later I had more crazy tests today. The nice lady who gave it to me told me the name and I asked her how you spell it so I could write it in my progress report. Thematic Perception Test. I don't know the first two words but I know what test means. You gotta pass it or you get bad marks. This test looked easy because I could see the pictures only this time she didn't want me to tell her the pictures. That mixed me up. I said the man yesterday said I should tell him what I saw in the ink. She said that don't make no difference. She said make up stories about the people in the pictures. I told her how can you tell stories about people you never met. I said why should I make up lies? I never tell lies anymore because I always get caught. She told me this test and the other one, the raw shock was for getting personality. Laughed so hard. I said how can you get things from ink blots and photos? She got sore and put her pictures away. I don't care. It was silly. I guess I failed that test too. Later some men in white coats took me to a different part of the hospital and gave me a game to play. It was like a race with a white mouse. I called the mouse at Algernon. Algernon was in a box with a lot of twists and turns like all kinds of walls and they gave me a pencil and a paper with lines and lots of boxes. On one side said start and on the other side said finish. They said it was amazed that Algernon and me had the same amazed to do. I didn't see how we could have the same amazed if Algernon had a box and I had paper but I didn't say nothing. Anyway, there wasn't time because the race started. One of the men had a watch he was trying to hide so I wouldn't see it so tried not to look and that made me nervous. Anyway, that test made me feel worse than all the others because they did it over 10 times with different amazes and Algernon won every time. I didn't know that mice were so smart. Maybe that's because Algernon is a white mouse. Maybe white mice are smarter than other mice. Progress Report 4, March 8. They're going to use me. I'm so excited I can hardly write. Dr. Niemer and Dr. Strauss had an argument about it first. Dr. Niemer was in the office when Dr. Strauss brought me in. Dr. Niemer was worried about using me but Dr. Strauss told him Ms. Kenian recommended me the best from all the people who was teaching. I like Ms. Kenian because she's a very smart teacher and she said, Charlie, you're going to have a second chance. If you volunteer for this experiment, you might get smart. They don't know if it'll be permanent but there's a chance. That's why I said okay even when I was scared because she said it was an operation. She said, don't be scared, Charlie. You've done so much with so little. I think you deserve it most of all. So I got scared when Dr. Niemer and Dr. Strauss argued about it. Dr. Strauss said I had something that was very good. He said I had a good motorvation. I never even knew I had that. I felt proud when he said that not everybody with an IQ of 68 had that thing. I don't know what it is or where I got it but he said Algernon had it too. Algernon's motorvation is the cheese they put in his box but it can't be that because I didn't eat any cheese this week. And he told Dr. Niemer something I didn't understand so all they were talking I wrote down some of the words. He said Dr. Niemer, I know Charlie is not what you had in mind as the first of your new breed of intellect. Couldn't get the word Superman. But most people of his low mint are hosts and uncoup usually dull up path and hard to reach. He has a good nature. He's interested and eager to please. Dr. Niemer said remember he'll be the first human being ever to have his intelligence tripled by surgical means. Dr. Strauss said exactly look how well he's learned to read and write for his low mental age. It's as great and achieve as you and I learn in Einstein's theory of the video with help without help that shows the intense motorvation it's compared to tremendous achieve I say we use Charlie. I didn't get all the words they were talking too fast but sounded like Dr. Strauss was on my side and like the other one wasn't. Then Dr. Niemer nodded he said all right maybe you're right we'll use Charlie. He said that I got so excited I jumped up and shook his hand for being so good to me. I told him thank you doc you won't be sorry for giving me a second chance and I mean it like I told him after the operation I'm gonna try and be smart. I'm gonna try awful hard. Progress ripped 5 March 10. I'm scared. Lots of people who work here and the nurses and the people who gave me the tests came to bring me candy and wish me luck. I hope I have luck. I got my rabbit's foot and my lucky penny and my horseshoe only black cat crossed me when I was coming to the hospital. Dr. Strauss says don't be super cities Charlie this is science. Anyway I'm keeping my rabbit's foot with me. I asked Dr. Strauss if I'll beat Algernon in the race after the operation. He said maybe if the operation works I'll show that mouse I can be as smart as he is maybe smarter. Then I'll be able to read better and spell the words good and know lots of things be like other people. I want to be smart like other people. If the works permanent they'll make everybody smart all over the world. They didn't give me anything to eat this morning. I don't know what that eating has to do with getting smart. I'm very hungry. Dr. Neamer took away my box of candy. Dr. Neamer is a grouch. Dr. Strauss says I can have it back after the operation. You can't eat for a operation. We all know someone who struggles with depression whether we know it or not. It's something that those who suffer tend to deal with in silence in the shadows. But the organizations we are supporting with our annual Overcoming the Darkness fundraiser this month are working to make it easier for those in the darkness to come into the light, to find help, and to learn that they're not alone, that there are ways to overcome the darkness and live normal lives. I'm evidence of that myself. I too suffer from depression. Our goal is to raise at least $5,000 this month, but the more we raise, the more people we can help to climb out of their own personal darkness. If you've not donated yet, or if you want to give again, or maybe you'd like to grab the link and share the fundraiser on your own social media and challenge others to give, visit WeirdDarkness.com slash Overcoming. That's WeirdDarkness.com slash Overcoming. The fundraiser ends on Halloween so please give right now while you're thinking about it WeirdDarkness.com slash Overcoming. Progress Report 6, March 15. The operation didn't hurt. He did it while I was sleeping. It took off the bandages from my eyes and my head today so I could make a progress report. Dr. Niemer, who looked at some of my other ones, said I'd spelt progress wrong and he told me how to spell it and report too. I gotta try and remember that. I have a very bad memory for spelling. Dr. Strauss says it's okay to tell about all the things that happen to me, but he says I should tell more about what I feel and what I think. But I told him I don't know how to think, he said try. All the time when the bandages were on my eyes, I tried to think. Nothing happened. I don't know what to think about. Maybe if I ask him, he'll tell me how I can think now that I'm supposed to get smart. What do smart people think about? Fancy things, I suppose. I wish I knew some fancy things already. Progress Report 7, March 19. Nothing is happening. I have a lot of tests and different kinds of races without your name. I hate that mouse. He always beats me. Dr. Strauss said I gotta play those games and he said sometime I gotta take those tests over again. Those ink blots are stupid. And those pictures are stupid too. I like to draw a picture of a man and a woman, but I won't make up lies about people. I got a headache from trying to think so much. I thought Dr. Strauss was my friend, but he don't help me. He don't tell me what to think or when I'll get smart. Miss Kenyan didn't come to see me. I think writing these Progress Reports are stupid too. Progress Report 8, March 23. I'm going back to work at the factory. They said it was better I should go back to work, but I can't tell anyone what the operation was for and I have to come to the hospital for an hour every night after work. They're gonna pay me money every month for learning to be smart. I'm glad I'm going back to work because I miss my job and all my friends and all the fun we have there. Dr. Strauss says I should keep writing things down, but I don't have to do it every day just when I think of something or something special happens. He says don't get discouraged because it takes time and it happens slow. He says it took a long time with Algernon before he got three times smarter than he was before. That's why Algernon beats me all the time because he had that operation too. That makes me feel better. I could probably do that amazed faster than a regular mouse. Maybe someday I'll beat Algernon. Boy, that would be something. So far Algernon looks like he might be smart, permanent. March 25. I don't have to write progress report on top anymore just when I hand it in once a week for Dr. Niemer to read. I just have to put the date on. That saves time. We had a lot of fun at the factory today. Joe Carp said, hey look where Charlie had his operation. Would they do Charlie? Put some brains in? I was going to tell him, but I remember Dr. Strauss said no. Then Frank Riley said, would you do Charlie? Forget your key and open your door the hard way. That made me laugh. Really my friends when they like me. Sometimes somebody will say, hey look at Joe or Frank or George. He really pulled a Charlie Gordon. I don't know why they see that, but they always laugh. This morning Amos Borg, who is the foreman at Donagans, used my name when he shouted at Ernie the office boy. Ernie lost a package. He said, Ernie for God's sake, what are you trying to do? Be a Charlie Gordon? I don't understand why I said that. I never lost any packages. March 28. Dr. Strauss came to my room tonight to see why I didn't come in like I was supposed to. I told him I don't like to race with Algernon anymore. He said, I don't have to for a while, but I should come in. He had a present for me only. It wasn't a present, but just for land. I thought it was a little television, but it wasn't. He said, I got to turn it on when I go to sleep. I said, you're kidding. Why should I turn it on when I'm going to sleep? Who ever heard of a thing like that? But he said, if I want to get smart, I got to do what he says. I told him I don't think I was going to get smart, and he put his hand on my shoulder and said, Charlie, you don't know it yet, but you're getting smarter all the time. You won't notice for a while. I think he is just being nice to make me feel good because I don't look any smarter. Oh, yeah, I almost forgot. I asked him when I can go back to the class with Miss Kenian's school. He said, I won't go there. He said that soon Miss Kenian will come to the hospital to start and teach me special. I was mad at her for not coming to see me when I got the operation, but I like her. So maybe we will be friends again, March 29. That crazy TV kept me up all night. How can I sleep with something yelling crazy things all night in my ears and the nutty pictures? Wow. I don't know what it says when I'm up, so how am I going to know when I'm sleeping? Dr. Strauss says it's okay. He says my brains are learning when I sleep and that will help me when Miss Kenian starts my lessons in the hospital. Only I found out it isn't a hospital, it's a laboratory. I think it's all crazy. If you can get smart when you're sleeping, why do people go to school? That thing I don't think will work. I used to watch The Late Show and The Late Late Show on TV all the time and it never made me smart. Maybe you have to sleep while you watch it. Progress Report 9, April 13. Dr. Strauss showed me how to keep the TV turned low, so now I can sleep. I don't hear a thing and I still don't understand what it says. A few times I play it over in the morning to find out what I learned when I was sleeping and I don't think so. Miss Kenian says maybe it's another language or something. Most times it sounds American. It talks so fast, faster than even Miss Gold who was my teacher in sixth grade and I remember she talked so fast I couldn't understand her. I told Dr. Strauss what good is it to get smart in my sleep. I want to be smart when I'm awake. He says it's the same thing and I have two minds. There's the subconscious and the conscious. That's how you spell it. And one don't tell the other one what it's doing. They don't even talk to each other. That's why I dream. And boy have I been having crazy dreams ever since that night TV late, late, late, late, late show. I forgot to ask him if it was only me or if everybody had those two minds. I just looked up the word in the dictionary Dr. Strauss gave me. The word is subconscious, ag, a DJ. Of the nature of mental operations yet not present in consciousness as subconscious conflict of desires. There's more but I still don't know what it means. This isn't a very good dictionary for dumb people like me. Anyway, the headache is from the party. My friends from the factory Joe Karp and Frank Riley invited me to go with them to Muggy's Saloon for some drinks. I don't like to drink but they said we'll have a lot of fun. I had a good time. Joe Karp said I should show the girls how I mop out the toilet in the factory and it got me a mop. I showed them and everyone laughed when I told that Mr. Donigan said I was the best janitor he ever had because I like my job and do it good and never come late or miss a day except for my operation. I said Miss Kenyon always said Charlie be proud of your job because you do it good. Everybody laughed. We had a good time and they gave me lots of drinks and Joe said Charlie is a card when he's potted. I don't know what that means. But everybody likes me and we have fun. I can't wait to be smart like my best friends Joe Karp and Frank Riley. I don't remember how the party was over but I think I went out to buy newspaper and coffee for Joe and Frank. When I came back there was no one there. I looked for them all over till late. Then I don't remember so good but I think I got sleepy or sick. A nice cop brought me back home. That's what my landlady Mrs. Flynn says. But I got a headache and a big lump on my head and black and blue all over. I think maybe I fell but Joe Karp says it was the cop. They beat up drunks sometimes. I don't think so. Miss Kenyon says cops are to help people. Anyway, I got a bad headache and I'm sick and hurt all over. I don't think I'll drink anymore. April 6th. I beat Algernon. I didn't even know I beat him until Bert the tester told me. Then the second time I lost because I got so excited I fell off the chair before I finished. But after that I beat him eight more times. I must be getting smart to beat a smart mouse like Algernon. And I don't feel smarter. I wanted to race Algernon some more but Bert said that that's enough for one day. They let me hold him for a minute. It's not so bad. He soft like a ball of cotton. He blinks and when he opens his eyes they're black and pink on the edges. I said can I feed him because I felt bad to beat him and I wanted to be nice and make friends. Bert said no. Algernon is a very special mouse with an operation like mine. And he was the first of all the animals to stay smart so long. He told me Algernon is so smart that every day he has to solve a test to get his food. It's a thing like a lock on a door that changes every time Algernon goes in to eat so he has to learn something new to get his food. That made me sad because if he couldn't learn he'd be hungry. I don't think it's right to make you pass a test to eat. I'd Dr. Neymar like it to have to pass a test every time he wants to eat. I think I'll be friends with Algernon. April 9. Tonight after work Miss Kenian was at the laboratory. She looked like she was glad to see me but scared. I told her don't worry Miss Kenian I'm not smart yet and she laughed. She said I have confidence in you Charlie the way you struggled so hard to read and write better than all the others. At worst you'll have it for a little while and you're doing something for science. We're reading a very hard book. I never read such a hard book before. It's called Robinson Crusoe by a man who gets marooned on a desert hand. He's smart and figures out all kinds of things so he can have a house and food and he's a good swimmer. Only I feel sorry because he's all alone has no friends but I think there must be somebody else on the island because there's a picture with his funny umbrella looking at footprints. I hope he gets a friend not be lonely. April 10. Miss Kenian teaches me to spell better. She says look at a word and close your eyes and say it over and over until you remember. I have lots of trouble with through that you say through and enough and tough that you don't say new and too. You gotta say enough and tough. That's how I used to write it before I started to get smart. I'm confused but Miss Kenian says there's no reason in spelling. April 14. Finished Robinson Crusoe. I want to find out more about what happens to him but Miss Kenian says that's all there is. Why? April 15. Miss Kenian says I'm learning fast. She reads some of the progress reports and she looked at me kind of funny. She says I'm a fine person and I'll show them all. I asked her why. She said never mind but I shouldn't feel bad if I find out that everybody isn't nice like I think. She said for a person who God gave so little to you done more than a lot of people with brains they never even used. I said all my friends are smart people but they're good. They like me. They never did anything that wasn't nice. Then she got something in her eye and she had to run out to the ladies room. April 16. Today I learned the comma. This is a period with a tail. Miss Kenian says it's important because it makes writing better. She said somebody could lose a lot of money if a comma isn't in right place. I don't have any money and I don't see how a comma keeps you from losing it. But she says everybody uses commas so I'll use them too. April 17. I used the comma wrong. It's punctuation. Miss Kenian told me to look up long words in the dictionary to learn to spell them. I said what's the difference if you can read it anyway. She said it's part of your education so now I'll look up all the words I'm not sure how to spell. Takes a long time to write that way but I think I'm remembering. I only have to look up once and after that I get it right. Anyway that's how come I got the word punctuation right. It's that way in the dictionary. Miss Kenian says a period is punctuation too and there are lots of other marks to learn. I told her I thought all the periods had to have tails but she said no. Gotta mix them up. She showed question mark, me, quotation mark, how a period to mix exclamation point them, left parentheses, up, comma, period, and now semicolon I can exclamation point. Mix up all kinds, quotation mark, punctuation, comma, in exclamation point, my writing question mark. There, comma, are lots. Exclamation point rules question mark to learn semicolon but I'm getting apostrophe g them in my head, period. One thing I question mark like about comma, dear Miss Kenian, colon, left parentheses, that's the way it goes in the business letter. If I ever go into business, right question mark is she, comma, always gives me apostrophe a reason when I ask, period. She's a genius exclamation point. I wish exclamation point. I could apostrophe D be smart, quotation mark, like comma, her, semicolon, left parentheses, punctuation, comma, is semicolon, fun, exclamation point, right, semicolon, April 18. What a dope I am exclamation point. I didn't even understand what she was talking about, period. I read the grammar book last night and it explains the whole thing. Then I saw it was the way as Miss Kenian was trying to tell me but I didn't get it. Got up in the middle of the night and the whole thing straightened out in my mind. Miss Kenian said that the TV working in my sleep helped out. She said I reached a plateau. It's like the flat top of a hill. After I figure out how punctuation worked, I read overall my old progress reports from the beginning. Boy, did I have crazy spelling and punctuation. I told Miss Kenian I ought to go over the pages and fix all the mistakes, but she said no, Charlie. Dr. Niemer wants them just as they are. That's why he let you keep them after they were photos statted. To see your own progress, you're coming along fast, Charlie. That made me feel good. After the lesson I went down and played with Algernon. We don't race anymore. April 20. I feel sick inside. Not sick like for a doctor, but inside my chest feels empty like getting punched in a heartburn at the same time. I wasn't going to write about it, but I guess I got to because it's important. Today was the first time I ever stayed home from work. Last night Joe Karp and Frank Riley invited me to a party. There were lots of girls and some men from the factory. I remembered how sick I got last time I drank too much, so I told Joe I didn't want anything to drink. He gave me a plain Coke instead. It tasted funny, but I thought it was just a bad taste in my mouth. We had a lot of fun for a while. Joe said I should dance with Ellen and she would teach me the steps. I fell a few times, and I couldn't understand why because no one else was dancing besides Ellen and me. All the time I was tripping because somebody's foot was always sticking out. Then when I got up I saw the look on Joe's face. It gave me a funny feeling in my stomach. He's a scream, one of the girls said. Everybody was laughing. Frank said I laughed so much since we sent him off for the newspaper that night at Mugsy's and ditched him. Look at him, his face is red. He's blushing. Charlie is blushing. Hey Ellen, what'd you do to Charlie? I never saw him act like that before. I don't know what to do or where to turn. Everyone was looking at me and laughing, and I felt naked. I wanted to hide myself. I ran out into the street, and I threw up. Then I walked home. It's a funny thing I never knew that Joe and Frank and the others liked to have me around all the time to make fun of me. Now I know what it means when they say to pull a Charlie Gordon. I'm ashamed. Central Massachusetts is a land of oddities and apparitions. Stories of the strange and paranormal have been passed down from generation to generation, and only the local populace has any idea of just how vast and deep their superstitions run. The world around you is much more than you can touch, taste, smell, see, and hear. Some of the stories are funny, some are sad, but all of them give you a taste of what it's like to be from the oddest part of the United States. You can't have a region of the country that has been settled for centuries without getting a few odd tales out of it. Open up a whole new world of fact and fiction that will leave you with a deep appreciation for the strange and bizarre ghosts and heroes await, and the only thing they need to live on is you, slightly odd Fitchburg, by Ed Sweeney. Now available on Kindle, paperback, and audiobook versions on the audiobooks page at WeirdDarkness.com. Still didn't go into the factory. I told Mrs. Flynn, my landlady, to call and tell Mr. Donigan I was sick. Mrs. Flynn looks at me, very funny, lately like she's scared of me. I think it's a good thing about finding out how everybody laughs at me. I thought about it a lot. It's because I'm so dumb, and I don't even know when I'm doing something dumb. People think it's funny when a dumb person can't do things the same way they can. Anyway, now I know I'm getting smarter every day. I know punctuation, and I can spell good. I like to look up all the hard words in the dictionary, and I remember them. I'm reading a lot now, and Miss Kinian says I read very fast. Sometimes I even understand what I'm reading about, and it stays in my mind. There are times when I can close my eyes and think of a page, and it all comes back like a picture. Besides history, geography, and arithmetic, Miss Kinian said I should start to learn a few foreign languages. Dr. Strauss gave me some more tapes to play while I sleep. I still don't understand how that consciousness and unconscious mind works, but Dr. Strauss says not to worry yet. He asked me to promise that when I start learning college subjects next week, I wouldn't read any books on psychology, that is, until he gives me permission. I feel a lot better today, but I guess I'm still a little angry at all the time people were laughing and making fun of me because I wasn't so smart. When I become intelligent, like Dr. Strauss says, with three times my IQ of 68, then maybe I'll be like everyone else, and people will like me and be friendly. I'm not sure what an IQ is. Dr. Niemer said it was something that measured how intelligent you were, like a scale in the drug store weighs pounds. But Dr. Strauss had a big argument with him and said an IQ didn't weigh intelligence at all. He said an IQ showed how much intelligence you could get, like the numbers on the outside of a measuring cup. He still had to fill the cup with stuff. Then when I asked Bert who gives me my intelligence tests and works with Algernon, he said that both of them were wrong. Only I had to promise not to tell them, he said so. Bert says the IQ measures a lot of different things, including some of the things you learned already, and it really isn't any good at all. So, I still don't know what IQ is, except that mine is going to be over 200 soon. I didn't want to say anything, but I don't see how, if they don't know what it is or where it is, I don't see how they know how much of it you've got. Dr. Neymar says I have to take a Rorschach test tomorrow. I wonder what that is. April 22. Found out what a Rorschach is. It's the test I took before the operation, the one with the ink blots on the piece as a cardboard. The man who gave me the test was the same one. I was scared to death of those ink blots. I knew he was going to ask me to find pictures, and I knew I wouldn't be able to. I was thinking to myself, if only there was some way of knowing what kind of pictures were hidden there. Maybe there weren't any pictures at all. Maybe it was just a trick to see if I was dumb enough to look for something that wasn't there. Just thinking about that made me soar at him. All right, Charlie, he said. You've seen these cards before, remember? Of course I remember. The way I said it, he knew I was angry, and he looked surprised. Yes, of course. Now, I want you to look at this one. What might this be? What do you see on this card? People see all sorts of things in these ink blots. Tell me what it might be for you, what it makes you think of. I was shocked. That wasn't what I had expected him to say at all. You mean there are no pictures hidden in those ink blots? He frowned and took off his glasses. What? Pictures hidden in the ink blots. Last time you told me that everyone could see them and you wanted me to find them too. He explained to me that the last time he had used almost the exact same words he was using now, I didn't believe it, and I still have the suspicion that he misled me at the time just for the fun of it. Unless… I don't know anymore. Could I have been that feeble-minded? We went through the cards slowly. One of them looked like a pair of bats tugging at something. Another one looked like two men fencing with swords. I imagined all sorts of things. I guess I got carried away, but I didn't trust him anymore and kept turning them around and even looked on the back to see if there was anything there I was supposed to catch. While he was making his notes, I peeked out of the corner of my eye to read it, but it was all in code that looked like this, WF plus ADDF minus ADORIG period WF minus ASF plus OBJ. The test still doesn't make sense to me. Seems to me that anyone could make up lies about the things that they didn't really see. How could he know I wasn't making a fool of him by mentioning things that I didn't really imagine? Maybe I'll understand it when Dr. Strauss lets me read up on psychology. April 25. I figured out a new way to line up the machines in the factory. Mr. Donigan says it'll save him $10,000 a year in labor and increased production. He gave me a $25 bonus. I wanted to take Joe Karp and Frank Riley out to launch to celebrate, but Joe said he had to buy some things for his wife and Frank said he was meeting his cousin for lunch. I guess it'll take a little time for them to get used to the changes in me. Everybody seems to be frightened of me. When I went over to Amos Borg and tapped him on the shoulder, he jumped up in the air. People don't talk to me much anymore or kid around the way they used to. Makes the job kind of lonely. April 27. I got up the nerve the day to ask Ms. Kinian to have dinner with me tomorrow night to celebrate my bonus. At first she wasn't sure it was right, but I asked Dr. Strauss and he said it was okay. Dr. Strauss and Dr. Niebuhr don't seem to be getting along so well. They're arguing all the time. This evening when I came in to ask Dr. Strauss about having dinner with Ms. Kinian, I heard him shouting. Dr. Niebuhr was saying that it was his experiment and his research, and Dr. Strauss was shouting back that he contributed just as much because he found me through Ms. Kinian and he performed the operation. Dr. Strauss said that someday thousands of neurosurgeons might be using his technique all over the world. Dr. Niebuhr wanted to publish the results of the experiment at the end of this month. Dr. Strauss wanted to wait a while longer, to be sure. Dr. Strauss said that Dr. Niebuhr was more interested in the chair of psychology at Princeton than he was in the experiment. Dr. Niebuhr said that Dr. Strauss was nothing but an opportunist who was trying to ride to glory on his coattails. When I left afterwards I found myself trembling. I don't know why, for sure, but it was as if I had seen both men clearly for the first time. I remember hearing Burt say that Dr. Niebuhr had a shrew of a wife who was pushing him all the time to get things published so that he could become famous. Burt said that the dream of her life was to have a big shot husband. Was Dr. Strauss really trying to ride on his coattails? April 28. I don't understand why I never noticed how beautiful Miss Kenyan really is. She has brown eyes and feathery brown hair that comes to the top of her neck. She's only 34. I think from the beginning I had the feeling that she was an unreachable genius and very, very old. Now every time I see her she grows younger and more lovely. We had dinner and a long walk. When she said I was coming along so fast that soon I'd be leaving her behind I laughed. It's true, Charlie, you're already a better reader than I am. You could read a whole page at a glance while I can take in only a few lines at a time. And you remember every single thing you read. I'm lucky if I can recall the main thoughts and the general meaning. I don't feel intelligent. There are so many things I don't understand. She took out a cigarette and I lit it for her. You gotta be a little patient. You're accomplishing in days and weeks what it takes normal people to do in half a lifetime. That's what makes it so amazing. You're like a giant sponge now soaking things in. Facts, figures, general knowledge, and soon you'll begin to connect them too. You'll see how the different branches of learning are related. There are many levels, Charlie, like steps on a giant ladder that take you up higher and higher to see more and more of the world around you. I can only see a little bit of that, Charlie, but I won't go much higher than I am now, but you'll keep climbing up and up and see more and more, and each step will open new worlds that you never even knew existed. She frowned. I hope—I just hope to God. What? Never mind, Charles. I just hope I wasn't wrong to advise you to go into this in the first place. I laughed. How could that be? It worked, didn't it? Even Algernon is still smart. We sat there silently for a while, and I knew what she was thinking about as she watched me toying with the chain of my rabbit's foot and my keys. I didn't want to think of that possibility any more than elderly people want to think of death. I knew that this was only the beginning. I knew what she meant about levels because I'd seen some of them already. The thought of leaving her behind made me sad. I'm in love with Miss Kideon. Progress reports 12, April 30. I've quit my job with Donaghan's plastic box company. Mr. Donaghan insisted that it would be better for all concerned if I left. What did I do to make them hate me so? The first I knew of it was when Mr. Donaghan showed me the petition. 840 names. Everyone connected with the factory except Fanny Gurden. Scanning the list quickly, I saw at once that hers was the only missing name. All the rest demanded that I be fired. Jim Carp and Frank Riley wouldn't talk to me about it. No one else would either except Fanny. She was one of the few people I'd known who set her mind to something and believed it no matter what the rest of the world proved said or did. And Fanny did not believe that I should have been fired. She'd been against the petition on principle and despite the pressure and threats she'd held out. Which don't mean to say, she remarked, that I don't think there's something mighty strange about you, Charlie. Them changes, I don't know. You used to be a good dependable ordinary man, not too bright maybe, but honest. Who knows what you'd done to yourself to get so smart all of a sudden, like everybody around here has been saying, Charlie, it's not right. But how can you say that, Fanny? What's wrong with a man becoming intelligent and wanting to acquire knowledge and understanding of the world around him? She stared down at her work and I turned to leave. Without looking at me, she said, It was evil when Eve listened to the snake and ate from the tree of knowledge. It was evil when she saw that she was naked. If not for that, none of us would ever have to grow old and sick and die. Once again, now I have the feeling of shame burning inside me. This intelligence has driven a wedge between me and all the people I once knew and loved. Before they laughed at me and despised me for my ignorance and dullness. Now they hate me for my knowledge and understanding. What in God's name do they want from me? They've driven me out of the factory. Now I'm more alone than ever before. May 15. Dr. Strauss is very angry at me for not having written any progress reports in two weeks. He's justified because the lab is now paying me a regular salary. I told him I was too busy thinking and reading. When I pointed out that writing was such a slow process that it made me impatient with my poor handwriting, he suggested that I learn to type. It's much easier to write now because I can type nearly 75 words a minute. Dr. Strauss continually reminds me of the need to speak and write simply so that people will be able to understand me. I'll try to review all the things that happened to me during the last two weeks. Algernon and I were presented to the American Psychological Association sitting in convention with the World Psychological Association last Tuesday. We created quite a sensation. Dr. Niemer and Dr. Strauss were proud of us. I suspect that Dr. Niemer, who is 60, 10 years older than Dr. Strauss, finds it necessary to see tangible results of his work, undoubtedly the result of pressure by Mrs. Niemer. Contrary to my earlier impressions of him, I realize that Dr. Niemer is not at all a genius. He has a very good mind, but it struggles under the specter of self-doubt. He wants people to take him for a genius, therefore it is important for him to feel that his work is accepted by the world. I believe that Dr. Niemer was afraid of further delay because he worried that someone else might make a discovery along these lines and take the credit from him. Dr. Strauss, on the other hand, might be called a genius, although I feel that his areas of knowledge are too limited. He was educated in the tradition of narrow specialization. The broader aspects of background were neglected far more than necessary, even for a neurosurgeon. I was shocked to learn that the only ancient languages he could read were Latin, Greek and Hebrew, and that he knows almost nothing of mathematics beyond the elementary levels of the calculus of variations. When he admitted this to me, I found myself almost annoyed. It was as if he had hidden this part of himself in order to deceive me, pretending, as do many people I have discovered, to be what he is not. No one I have ever known is what he appears to be on the surface. Dr. Niemer appears to be uncomfortable around me. Sometimes when I try to talk to him, he just looks at me strangely and turns away. I was angry at first when Dr. Strauss told me I was giving Dr. Niemer an inferiority complex. I thought he was mocking me and I'm oversensitive at being made fun of. How was I to know that a highly respected psycho-experimentalist like Niemer was unequated with Hindustani and Chinese? It's absurd when you consider the work that is being done in India and China today in the very field of his study. I asked Dr. Strauss how Niemer could refute Rajasmani's attack on his method and results if Niemer couldn't even read them in the first place. A strange look on Dr. Strauss' face can mean only one of two things. Either he doesn't want to tell Niemer what they're saying in India or else, and this worries me, Dr. Strauss doesn't know either. I must be careful to speak and write clearly and simply so that people won't laugh. May 18. I am very disturbed. I saw Ms. Kinian last night for the first time in over a week. I tried to avoid all discussions of intellectual concepts and to keep the conversation on a simple, everyday level, but she just stared at me blankly and asked me what I meant about the mathematical variance equivalent in Doberman's fifth concerto. When I tried to explain, she stopped me and laughed. I guess I got angry, but I suspect I'm approaching her on the wrong level. No matter what I try to discuss with her, I am unable to communicate. I must review Rostad's equations of levels of semantic progression. I find that I don't communicate with people much anymore. Thank God for books and music and things I can think about. I am alone in my apartment at Mrs. Flynn's boarding house most of the time and seldom speak to anyone. May 20. I would not have noticed the new dishwasher, the boy of about 16 at the corner diner where I take my evening meals if not for the incident of the broken dishes. They crashed to the floor, shattering and sending bits of white china under the tables. The boy stood there, dazed and frightened, holding the empty tray in his hand, the whistles and catcalls from the customers, the cries of, Hey, there go the profits, Mazel Tov, and, well, he didn't work here very long, which invariably seemed to follow the breaking of glass or dishware in a public restaurant. All seemed to confuse him. When the owner came to see what the excitement was about, the boy cowered, as if he expected to be struck and threw up his arms as if to ward off the blow. All right, all right, you dope, shouted the owner. Don't just stand there and get the broom and sweep that mess up. A broom. A broom, you idiot. It's in the kitchen. Sweep up all the pieces. The boy saw that he was not going to be punished. His frightened expression disappeared and he smiled and hummed as he came back with the broom to sweep the floor. A few of the rowdy customers kept up the remarks, amusing themselves at his expense. Here, sonny, over here, there's a nice piece behind you. Come on, do it again. He's not so dumb, it's easier to break him than to wash him. As his vacant eyes moved across the crowd of amused onlookers, he slowly mirrored their smiles and finally broke into an uncertain grin at the jokes which he obviously did not understand. I felt sick inside as I looked at his dull, vacuous smile, the wide bright eyes of a child, uncertain but eager to please. They were laughing at him because he was mentally retarded. And I had been laughing at him, too. Suddenly I was furious at myself and all those who were smirking at him. I jumped up and shouted, shut up, leave him alone, it's not his fault, he can't understand. He can't help what he is, but for God's sake, he's still a human being. The room grew silent. I cursed myself for losing control and creating a scene. I tried not to look at the boy as I paid my check and walked out without touching my food. I felt ashamed for both of us. How strange it is that people of honest feelings and sensibility, who would not take advantage of a man born without arms or legs or eyes, how such people think nothing of abusing a man born with low intelligence. It infuriated me to think that not too long ago I, like this boy, had foolishly played the clown. And I had almost forgotten. I had hidden the picture of the old Charlie Gordon from myself because now that I was intelligent, it was something that had to be pushed out of my mind. But today, in looking at that boy, for the first time I saw what I had been. I was just like him. Only a short time ago I learned that people laughed at me. Now I can see that unknowingly I joined with them in laughing at myself. That hurts most of all. I have often re-read my progress reports and seen the illiteracy, the childish naivete, the mind of low intelligence peering from a dark room through the keyhole at the dazzling light outside. I see that even in my dullness I knew that I was inferior and that other people had something I lacked, something denied me. In my mental blindness, I thought that it was somehow connected with the ability to read and write, and I was sure that if I could get those skills I would automatically have intelligence too. Even a feeble-minded man wants to be like other men. A child may not know how to feed itself or what to eat, yet it knows of hunger. This then is what I was like. I never knew. Even with my gift of intellectual awareness I never really knew. This day was good for me. Seeing the past more clearly, I have decided to use my knowledge and skills to work in the field of increasing human intelligence levels. Who is better equipped for this work? Who else has lived in both worlds? These are my people. Let me use my gift to do something for them. Tomorrow I will discuss with Dr. Strauss the manner in which I can work in this area. I may be able to help him work out the problems of widespread use of the technique which was used on me. I have several good ideas of my own. There is so much that might be done with this technique. If I could be made into a genius, what about thousands of others like myself? What fantastic levels might be achieved by using this technique on normal people? On geniuses! There are so many doors to open, I am impatient to begin. Are you a member of the Darkness Syndicate? The Darkness Syndicate is a private membership where you receive commercial-free episodes of the Weird Darkness podcast and radio show. Behind the scenes, video updates about future projects and events I am working on. You can share your own opinions on ideas to help me decide upon Weird Darkness contests and events. You can hear audiobooks I am narrating before even the publishers or authors get to hear them. You also receive bonus audio of other projects I am working on outside of Weird Darkness. You get all of these benefits and more starting at only $5 per month. Join the Weird Darkness Syndicate at WeirdDarkness.com Progress Report 13 May 23 It happened today. Algernon bit me. I visited the lab to see him as I do occasionally and when I took him out of his cage, he snapped at my hand. I put him back and watched him for a while. He was unusually disturbed and vicious. May 24 Burt, who is in charge of the experimental animals, tells me that Algernon is changing. He is less cooperative. He refuses to run the maze anymore. General motivation has decreased and he hasn't been eating. Everyone is upset about what this may mean. May 25 They have been feeding Algernon, who now refuses to work the shifting lock problem. Everyone identifies me with Algernon. In a way, we are both the first of our kind. They are all pretending that Algernon's behavior is not necessarily significant for me. But it is hard to hide the fact that some of the other animals who were used in this experiment are showing strange behavior. Dr. Strauss and Dr. Niemer have asked me not to come to the lab anymore. I know what they are thinking, but I can't accept it. I am going ahead with my plans to carry their research forward. With all due respect to both of these fine scientists, I am well aware of their limitations. If there is an answer, I will have to find it out for myself. Suddenly time has become very important to me. May 29 I have been given a lab of my own and permission to go ahead with my research. I am on to something, working day and night. I have had a cot moved into the lab. Most of my writing time is spent on the notes, which I keep in a separate folder, but from time to time I feel it necessary to put down my moods and my thoughts out of sheer habit. I find the calculus of intelligence to be a fascinating study. Here is the place for the application of all the knowledge I have acquired. In a sense, it is the problem I have been concerned with all my life. May 31 Dr. Strauss thinks I am working too hard. Dr. Niemer says I am trying to cram a lifetime of research and thought into a few weeks. I know I should rest, but I am driven on by something inside that won't let me stop. I have got to find the reason for the sharp regression in Algernon. I have got to know if and when it will happen to me. June 4 Letter to Dr. Strauss Copy Dear Dr. Strauss, Under separate cover, I am sending you a copy of my report entitled The Algernon Gordon Effect, a study of structure and function of increased intelligence, which I would like to have you read and have published. As you see, my experiments are completed. I have included in my report all of my formulae, as well as mathematical analysis in the appendix. Of course, these should be verified. Because of its importance to both you and Dr. Niemer, and need I say to myself too, I have checked and rechecked my results a dozen times in the hope of finding an error. I am sorry to say the results must stand. Yet for the sake of science, I am grateful for the little bit that I here add to the knowledge of the function of the human mind and of the laws governing the artificial increase of human intelligence. I recall your once saying to me that an experimental failure or the disproving of a theory was as important to the advancement of learning as a success would be. I know now that this is true. I am sorry, however, that my own contribution to the field must rest upon the ashes of the work of two men I regard so highly. Yours truly, Charles Gordon. And, Rept, June 5. I must not become emotional. The facts and the results of my experiments are clear. And the more sensational aspects of my rapid climb cannot obscure the fact that the tripling of intelligence by the surgical technique developed by Dr. Strauss and Niemer must be viewed as having little or no practical applicability at the present time to the increase of human intelligence. As I review the records and data on Algernon, I see that although he is still in his physical infancy, he has regressed mentally. Motor activity is impaired. There is a general reduction of glandular activity. There is an accelerated loss of coordination. There are also strong indications of progressive amnesia. As will be seen by my report, these and other physical and mental deterioration syndromes can be predicted with statistically significant results by the application of my formula. The surgical stimulus to which we were both subjected has resulted in an intensification and acceleration of all mental processes. The unforeseen development which I have taken the liberty of calling the Algernon-Gordon effect is the logical extension of the entire intelligence speed up. The hypothesis here proven may be described simply in the following terms. Artificially increased intelligence deteriorates at a rate of time directly proportional to the quantity of the increase. I feel that this in itself is an important discovery. As long as I am able to write, I will continue to record my thoughts in these progress reports. It is one of my few pleasures. However, by all indications, my own mental deterioration will be very rapid. I have already begun to notice signs of emotional instability and forgetfulness, the first symptoms of the burnout. June 10. Deterioration progressing. I become absent-minded. Algernon died two days ago. Dissection shows my predictions were right. His brain has decreased in weight, and there was a general smoothing out of cerebral convolutions as well as a deepening and broadening of brain fissures. I guess the same thing is or will soon be happening to me. Now that it's definite, I don't want it to happen. I put Algernon's body in a cheese box and buried him in the backyard. I cried. June 15. Dr. Strauss came to see me again. I wouldn't open the door when I told him to go away. I want to be left to myself. I become touchy and irritable. I feel the darkness closing in. It's hard to throw off thoughts of suicide. I keep telling myself how important this introspective journal will be. It's a strange sensation to pick up a book that you've read and enjoyed just a few months ago and discover that you don't remember it. I remember how great I thought John Milton was, but when I picked up Paradise Lost, I couldn't understand it at all. I got so angry I threw the book across the room. Gotta try to hold on to some of it. Some of the things I've learned, oh, God, please don't take it all away. June 19. Sometimes at night I go out for a walk. Last night I couldn't remember where I lived. A policeman took me home. I have a strange feeling that this has all happened to me before, a long time ago. I keep telling myself I'm the only person in the world who can describe what's happening to me. June 21. Why can't I remember? I've got a fight. I lie in bed for days and I don't know who or where I am. Then it all comes back to me in a flash. Fugues of amnesia. Symptoms of senility. Second childhood. I can watch them coming on. It's so cruelly logical. I learned so much and so fast, now my mind is deteriorating rapidly. I won't let it happen. I'll fight it. I can't help thinking of the boy in the restaurant, the blank expression, the silly smile, the people laughing at him. Oh, please, not that again. June 22. I'm forgetting things that I learned recently. It seems to be following the classic pattern. Last things learned are the first things forgotten. Or is that the pattern? I'd better look it up again. I re-read my paper on the Algernon Gordon effect, and I get the strange feeling that it was written by someone else. There are parts I don't even understand. Motor activity impaired. I keep tripping over things, and it becomes increasingly difficult to type. June 23. I've given up using the typewriter completely. My coordination is bad. I feel that I'm moving slower and slower. Had a terrible shock today. I picked up a copy of an article I used in my research, Kruger's Uber Psychic Genzite to see if it would help me understand what I had done. First I thought there was something wrong with my eyes, and then I realized I could no longer read German. I tested myself in other languages. All gone. June 30. A week since I dared to write again. It's slipping away like sand through my fingers. Most of the books I have are too hard for me now. I get angry with them because I know that I read and understood them just a few weeks ago. I keep telling myself I must keep writing these reports so that somebody don't know what's happening to me. But it gets harder to form the words and remember spellings. I have to look up even simple words in the dictionary now, and it makes me impatient with myself. Dr. Strauss comes around almost every day, but I told him I wouldn't see or speak to anybody. He feels guilty. They all do. But I don't blame anyone. I knew what might happen. But how it hurts. July 7. I don't know where the week went. Today's Sunday. I know because I can see through my window people going to church. I think I stayed in bed all week, but I remember Mrs. Flynn bringing food to me a few times. I keep saying over and over I gotta do something, but then I forget, or maybe it's just easier not to do what I say I'm gonna do. I think of my mother and father a lot these days. I find a picture of them with me taking at a beach. My father has a big ball under his arm, and my mother is holding me by the hand. I don't remember them the way they are in the picture. All I remember is my father drunk most of the time and arguing with my mom about money. He never shaved much, and he used to scratch my face when he hugged me. My mother said he died, but cousin Milt he said he heard his mom and dad say my father ran away with another woman. When I asked my mother, she slapped my face, said my father was dead. I don't think I ever found out which was true. But I don't care much. He said he was gonna take me to see cows on a farm once, but he never did. He never kept his promises. July 10. My landlady, Mrs. Flynn, is very worried about me. She says the way I lay around all day and don't do anything, I remind her of her son before she threw him out of the house. She said she doesn't like loafers. If I'm sick it's one thing, but if I'm a loafer that's another thing and she won't have it. I told her I think I'm sick. I try to read a little bit every day, mostly stories, but sometimes I have to read the same thing over and over again because I don't know what it means. And it's hard to write. I know I should look up all the words in the dictionary, but it's so hard. I'm so tired all the time. Then I got the idea that I'd only use the easy words instead of the long hard ones. That saves time. I put flowers on Algernon's grave about once a week. Mrs. Flynn thinks I'm crazy to put flowers on a mouse's grave, but I told her that Algernon was special. July 14. It's Sunday again. I don't have anything to do to keep me busy now because my television set it broke. I don't have any money to get it fixed. I think I lost this month's check from the lab. I don't remember. I get awful headaches. Asperin doesn't help me much. Mrs. Flynn knows I'm really sick and she feels very sorry for me. She's a wonderful woman whenever someone is sick. July 22. Mrs. Flynn called a strange doctor to see me. She's afraid I was going to die. I told the doctor I wasn't too sick and that I only forget sometimes. He asked me if I had any friends or relatives. I said no, I don't have any. I told him I had a friend called Algernon once, but he is a mouse and we used to run races together. He looked at me kind of funny like he thought I was crazy. He smiles when I told him I used to be a genius. He talked to me like I was a baby and he winked at Mrs. Flynn. I got mad and chased him out because he is making fun of me the way they all used to. As you already know, Built Bar is a sponsor of Weird Darkness. Don't tell them I said this, but I would continue to let them be a sponsor without them paying me at all, so long as they continue to send me these free samples. Today I received their new cookies and cream chunk. It's like having actual cookies and cream chunks in the candy bar. These are protein bars. These aren't candy bars, so they're low calorie. This has 18 grams of carbs. That's fewer carbs than an average size banana or a honey crisp apple. This is my lunch and it feels like I just had dessert. This cookies and cream chunk is just insanely good. You can save 10% off of anything you buy from Built. Just go to WeirdDarkness.com slash Built and use the promo code WeirdDarkness. All one word you can get 10% off your entire order, including the cookies and cream chunk. Now the hard part is this actually tastes like dessert, but I want to eat another one. July 24. I have no more money and Mrs. Flynn says I gotta go to work somewhere and pay the rent because I haven't paid for over two months. I don't know any work, but the job I used to have, Donaghan's Plastic Box Company. I don't want to go back there because they all knew me when I was smart and maybe they'll laugh at me, but I don't know what else to do to get money. July 25. I was looking at some of my old progress reports and it's very funny, but I can't read what I wrote. I can make out some of the words, but they don't make sense. Ms. Kinian came to the door, but I said go away. I don't want to see you. She cried and I cried too, but I wouldn't let her in because I didn't want her to laugh at me. I told her I didn't like her anymore. I told her I didn't want to be smart anymore. That's not true. I still love her and I still want to be smart, but I had to say that so she'd go away. She gave Mrs. Flynn money to pay the rent. I don't want that. I got to get a job. Please, please, let me not forget how to read and write July 27. Mr. Donaghan was very nice when I came back and asked him for my old job of janitor. First he was very suspicious, but I told him what happened to me. Then he looked very sad with his hand on my shoulder and said, Charlie Gordon, you got guts. Everybody looked at me when I came downstairs and started working in the toilet, sweeping it out like I used to. I told myself, Charlie, if they make fun of you, don't get sore because you remember they're not so smart as you once thought they were. And besides, they were once your friends. And if they laughed at you, that don't mean nothing because they liked you too. One of the new men came to work there after I went away, made a nasty crack. He said, hey, Charlie, I hear you're a very smart fella, real, real quiz kid. Say something intelligent. I felt bad, but Joe Karp came over, grabbed him by the shirt and said, leave him alone, you lousy cracker, or I'll break your neck. I didn't expect Joe to take my part, so I guess he's really my friend. Later, Frank Riley came over and said, Charlie, if anybody bothers you or tries to take advantage, you call me or Joe will set him straight. I said, thanks, Frank. I choked up, so I had to turn around and go into the supply room so he wouldn't see me cry. It's good to have friends. July 28. I did a dumb thing today. I forgot I wasn't in Miss Kenyan's class at the adult center anymore, like I used to be. I went in and sat down in my old seat in the back of the room. She looked at me funny and she said, Charles. I didn't remember she ever called me that before, only Charlie. So I said, hello, Miss Kenyan. I'm read for my lesson today, only I lost my reader that we was using. She started to cry and run out the room. Everybody looked at me. I saw they wasn't the same people who used to be in my class. Then all of a sudden I remember some things about the operation and me getting smart. I said, holy smoke, I really pulled at Charlie Gordon that time. I went away before she'd come back to the room. That's why I'm going away from New York for good. I don't want to do nothing like that again. I don't want Miss Kenyan feel sorry for me. Everybody feels sorry at factory. I don't want that either, so I'm going someplace where nobody knows Charlie Gordon was once a genius and now I can't even read a book or write good. Take a couple books along. Even if I can't read them, I'll practice hard and maybe I won't forget everything I learned. If I try read hard, maybe I'll be a little bit smarter than I was before the operation. I got my rabbit's foot and my lucky penny and maybe they'll help me. If you ever read this, Miss Kenyan, don't be sorry for me. I'm glad I got a second chance to be smart because I learned a lot of things that I never even knew were in this world. I'm grateful that I saw it all for a little bit. I don't know why I'm dumb again or what I did wrong. Maybe it's because I didn't try hard enough, but if I try and practice very hard, maybe I'll get a little smarter and know what all the words are. I remember a little bit how nice I had a feeling with the blue book that has a torn cover when I read it. That's why I'm going to keep trying to get smart, so I can have that feeling again. It's a good feeling to know things and be smart. I wish I had it right now. If I did, I'd sit down and read all the time. Anyway, I'm the first dumb person in the world who ever found something important for science. I remember I did something, but I don't remember what. So I guess it's like I did it for all the dumb people like me. Goodbye, Miss Kenyan and Dr. Strauss and everybody. And P.S., please tell Dr. Niemer not to be such a grouch when people laugh at him and he'd have more friends. It's easy to make friends if you let people laugh at you. I'm going to have a lot of friends where I go. P.P.S., please if you get a chance. Put some flowers on Algernon's grave in the backyard. Thanks for listening. If you like to show, please share it with someone you know who loves the paranormal or strange stories, true crime, monsters or unsolved mysteries like you do. You can email me anytime with your questions or comments at darren at WeirdDarkness.com. WeirdDarkness.com is also where you can find information on any of the sponsors you heard about during the show, find all of my social media, listen to audiobooks I've narrated, sign up for the email newsletter, find other podcasts that I host, including Church of the Undead, visit the store for Weird Darkness merchandise and more. WeirdDarkness.com is also where you can find the Hope in the Darkness page if you or someone you know is struggling with depression or dark thoughts. Also on the website, if you have a true paranormal or creepy tale to tell, you can click on Tell Your Story. You can find all of that and more at WeirdDarkness.com. All stories on Thriller Thursday episodes are works of fiction and you can find links to the stories or the authors in the show notes. Flowers for Algernon was written by Daniel Keys and I read it from the book The Science Fiction Hall of Fame, Volume 1, 1929-1964, which I found on Kindle. I'll place a link to the book in the show notes. WeirdDarkness is a registered trademark. Copyright, Weird Darkness. And now that we're coming out of the dark, I'll leave you with a little light. Proverbs 1 verse 7, Fear of the Lord is the foundation of true knowledge, but fools despise wisdom and discipline. And a final thought, the true sign of intelligence is not knowledge, but imagination. Albert Einstein. I'm Darren Marlar. Thanks for joining me in the Weird Darkness. You can hear the snarls right behind you, the faster you run, the closer the creatures seem to get. How can the undead run this fast, you think to yourself? Now you're drenched in sweat, but your mouth is dry. You need to find somewhere to stop and think about how to survive the next few minutes of your life. Then you see it and run towards the water station. 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That's the number 4 Patriots.com, and use the promo code WEIRD to get 10% off everything you order. That's 4Patriots.com, promo code WEIRD. Uh oh, zombies are back. Hey weirdos, be sure to click the like button and subscribe to this channel and click the notification bell so you don't miss future videos. I post videos seven days a week, and while you're at it, spread the darkness by sharing this video with someone you know who loves all things strange and macabre. If you want to listen to the podcast, you can find it at WeirdDarkness.com.