 Just been driving for a few hours and I arrived at this bungalow where I'm staying tonight Got two beds here In case anyone wants to come here and chill. We can relax together by this farm It's very peaceful out here More my kind of scene as you know, I'm not really fussed about cities. I prefer quiet places But yes, I'm just having a good time out here and got a very important topic for tonight We're talking about How to defeat the narcissist? because it seems that This is quite a difficult thing to do and I've spoken about it in the past I've done videos on How to defeat the narcissist And it's very rare that I say this in fact, this may be the first time But in those videos in the past where I talked about Defeating the narcissist. I'm starting to believe that I got it wrong because I used to say that If you want to defeat the narcissist you just have to Become happier and more successful and you can take pictures about your new amazing life without them Put it on social media so they can see it When actually that is the wrong thing to do So I take back advice At the time it seemed correct But the reality is that If you do go on to become happier and more successful without them They're only going to come back to destroy it Or they're going to discredit you to everyone They're going to make you look bad They're going to destroy your reputation They're going to try to sabotage your new job your business Whatever it is that you have accomplished They're just going to tear it all down Even though you may be doing it because the entire time They made you feel like you're not good enough So now it's like you want to prove a point You want to gain their validation By using everything that they did to you Everything that they said As your motivation to become better When actually doing that is just going to make them envious and jealous It's just going to make them want to come back to destroy it So I don't advise doing that at all I'm not saying that you shouldn't try to become happier Or more successful without them But if you do Make sure that they don't know about it Don't reveal that information to them Because they're not going to appreciate it They will never appreciate you They will never give you that validation that you're looking for The more that you try to please and impress them The more that they're going to want to destroy you Because they're envious of that So be very aware of that When you're dealing with narcissists And in fact what I do advise you to do If you finally want to defeat them You have to stop listening to the things that they're saying about you And even the things that they're doing Don't let it get to you You can't care about it The more that you care the more that they're going to do it And there's no point in worrying about things that are outside of your control Things that no matter what you do it's not going to change the end result They're still going to hate and despise you It's not going to change anything So don't even try to control it And instead you need to become indifferent To where you no longer resonate with the things that they're saying or doing It no longer bothers you, it no longer gets to you You are unfazed, you are unmoved It doesn't affect you emotionally It doesn't make you react And instead you choose to maintain your distance You recognize that there is power in being alone and without them You recognize that that is your strength That the isolation empowers you And that you don't need all of these people in your life All of these flying monkeys They're not going to do anything for you They're not going to support you So what does it look like When you have defeated the narcissist How it looks is instead of worrying too much About superficial things Whether it be money power or success Or trying to prove a point to them Trying to surpass them Trying to live the best life that you can live Trying to achieve all of these things Instead of doing that And putting yourself in a very vulnerable position Where they then have the opportunity to come and destroy it Instead of doing that Focus on building your character Focus on acquiring knowledge experience and skills Things that cannot be destroyed or taken away Things that still have power To influence other people To improve other people's lives Where you can become motivational and inspirational And not only that But being able to enjoy the little things in life Instead of trying to compete with them And to show them that you're so much happier without them If you want to show them that you're happy Let them see you out in nature Where you're not worried about things Where you're not worried about money Because however it is the situation Whether they have more money than you Or you have more money than them Either way they're still going to use money wealth and success to control you So you have to learn to be happy with less You have to focus on things like Acquiring knowledge skills and experience Influencing other people in a positive direction Focus on what you can control Because you cannot control them You cannot control what they do So even though all of these things may be happening around you Things that you may not be pleased with Things that you do not approve of You have to recognize that it is out of your control And instead of worrying about it and reacting to it And being in that state of fear that they want you to be in Instead of doing that practice discipline and self-control Emotional stability Be in control of your emotions and reactions By focusing on logic and reason Acquiring new skills More knowledge wisdom and experience Rather than being naive like you were before Where you were willing to believe anything That they said to you And you let it have power over you You let it control you And your emotions Instead of doing that become more centered Look within Practice mindfulness and meditation Spend time out in nature Things that don't cost anything Or it doesn't cost much Just focus on simple things in life Don't put yourself in a vulnerable position Where you are open to attack Because that's all you're going to be doing If you go on and You work hard at your job You start a new business You're becoming more successful You're making loads of money That just entices them to come back And destroy everything for you again Because they will be very envious and jealous So doing these things And showcasing it on social media That you're having a great time You're living your best life without them That is not the right way to go about it I don't advise doing that at all Instead I advise going off the grid Not spending too much time on social media Not even showing them that you're happy Let them think that you're down Let them think that you're miserable without them And then they might just leave you alone Because look at all of those times that you were miserable Were they ever there for you Were they ever there to help you Did they ever care about you No, they left you alone They thought they were leaving you to rot So that is what you have to do Make it look like things aren't going so well If you're taking pictures Don't wear your new clothes If you bought a new car Don't let them know about it Don't let them know anything And in fact, be very careful With the things that you have, your possessions Don't go around wearing designer clothes Or buying flashy cars I mean, I don't want to tell you what to do Or how to live your life But you have to think carefully About how this will affect the narcissist Because if they see all these things They're only going to come back to use and destroy you So be very careful and learn to live a more humble life That's my advice What you choose to do, that's up to you For me, as you've probably noticed I'm not really too focused on flashy things anymore I prefer to live a quiet life My main focus now is my daughter And of course Nala as well She's in Malaysia at the moment But other than that That's all that I really worry about in my life Those are the two most important things to me And even myself I just maintain basic health Basic appearance for my videos, my work Other than that I don't really do too many exciting things Like I did before I don't like to show off I like to keep everything quiet Just live a regular life And in fact I do find happiness in that I find a lot of peace And my main focus now Is my child And my cat That's all that really matters to me And of course this community as well But even these things Who's to say that one day something happens to this community And I don't have that anymore Or something happens to my cat And even my daughter I haven't seen her for over two years So at this point I'm not really attached to anything I learn to find peace in myself no matter what And as the Buddha once said Attachment is the root of all suffering So the less attachments you have in your life The more at peace you will be And you should definitely detach from the narcissist and Trying to prove a point to them Because as I said that is not going to help you That will likely make things worse for you So put the focus back in yourself Just acquiring new knowledge, skills and experience Just finding peace in yourself, in mindfulness and meditation Learning new things That's what I advise you to do And when you become non-reactive You no longer care too much about what they're doing That's when you've defeated the narcissist And that is the only way to defeat the narcissist Just saw a lizard on the window Don't know if you know but I love lizards I just like the shape of them But yes that's what it's really about Just going within to find your happiness I mean the reality is even if the narcissist left you alone I've experienced this myself What I acquired all of these things Staying in these four bedroom villas Driving a Porsche Meeting all of these girls None of that ever made me happy I never felt at peace when I was doing those things It actually just distracted me from all of these things that were going on within And it's like once all of those things got taken away Then I really started to go within myself I started to remember my passion in helping other people Being of service to them And for me as an empath Even despite all of the pain that I've been through And everything that was done to me That's still what matters to me the most It's having empathy for other people And just doing the best that I can giving value But yes that may also make you a target And you do need to be selective In who you do that to But I'm definitely not against showing empathy To some being of service and helping them I'm still going to continue to do that I do believe that that is my purpose in this life But aside from that Living a flashy luxurious lifestyle That's just not important to me anymore I mean I've been there, I've done that As I've said it's more about this community It's more about my daughter and my cat These three things are all that really matter to me And even then I don't attach them too much Because like I said at any moment Things can be stripped away from you So if you're not attached to these things You can still find peace and happiness within yourself So that's really it, that's the message And I hope that it does bring you peace and comfort In knowing this how you can defeat them Instead of trying to prove a point to them Or seeking validation Or even trying to get them back So yes, 100 live viewers Please show your support down below If this video was helpful for you By giving it a thumbs up And don't forget to subscribe as well If you haven't yet Hit the bell icon To receive notifications for my future videos And if you'd like to book a one-on-one with me You can do that on my website It's narksafiver.co.uk And check out my Instagram as well Narksafiver YouTube and Instagram I do have new pictures and videos of my travels on there But as I said, not too many flashy things Just a simple life Simple living Just exploring adventure So if that sounds like something you're into Check it out, my Instagram Narksafiver YouTube Other than that, that's all I've got to say Thank you all for joining me And I'll talk to you in another video