 when she says she doesn't feel a connection. So if you're watching this video, maybe chances are you've heard a woman tell you this. I got a question recently that prompted me to answer it. I've actually gotten many questions about this. And usually what happens, in this case, the guy had gone out on a couple of dates with this girl and he felt like the dates went really well. She was texting, she was responding and then before the date, that was what's happening. Then during the date, they went on this great day, they went to eat, they walked in the pier afterwards, you know, talked and then I think they made out and then when he dropped her off, it seemed like it was really good. She texted him, she got home and then afterwards she says, hey, you know, I just don't feel like there's a connection here. And he was, you know, really upset by this because he thought there was and there's a big disconnect there, like, okay. So he thinks that there's a big connection but she's not feeling the same thing. Is she telling the truth? Is this like something that he can work on or is it just something that's, you know, chemistry, either you have it or you don't? As a dating coach, I am someone who, whenever someone says, oh, there's just no chemistry or oh, they just don't have this, like, I like to break that down. I like to figure out what is really going on here so I can help somebody out if they're getting told this continuously. It's very frustrating when you get told, hey, there's just not a connection. There's just not a connection. It's like, okay, well, what can I do to make a connection happen? Because I'm feeling a connection on my end so what's going on here? So if that's happening to you, then, lucky for you, we're gonna break down kind of what happens in these scenarios or what I've seen in these scenarios. Now, the first thing is that you can't control what's going on in a woman's head and a lot of times there can be a million things happening that you don't know about. For instance, if she is getting over her ex-boyfriend or if she's got something else going on with another guy, you know, in my experience, the women find it very difficult to be intimate or to have a connection with like multiple people at the same time if the connection is really strong with one person so that could be happening and you just don't know about it. But if that's not happening, if you're sure that she doesn't have that happening, then usually what I see is the way that they go about the date or the way that they are interacting with this person. I've seen this happen where a lot of guys will start fancying their waitress or even their therapist or that kind of person in their life, someone that's doing stuff for them and they start developing feelings for them because they're around them a lot and maybe they don't have a whole lot of options or they just are in a position where she is kind of maybe an authoritative figure a little bit and they have, because she's providing a lot of value in their life, they feel attraction. Well, women don't really go for that. The man to woman connection is when you lead and she follows, so if she's following you, then it can happen. But usually if you're the one who's following her, she won't feel attraction for you. But a lot of times what I've noticed is that the guy can sometimes feel attraction for the woman in that circumstance, kind of in a motherly weird way, but it happens. And so you feel this connection when in actuality, you were following her and that's just not going to make her feel feminine. It's not going to make her feel attracted to you because it's not the masculine feminine dynamic. Okay, she wants someone that she can follow and in my experience, if a guy is doing this, usually what's happening is that he's going to her a lot. He's letting her kind of lead the interactions, lead the date. He doesn't really know what he's doing when he's on the date. Maybe it's just like walking around kind of aimlessly. She's the one who's kind of picking out or figuring out where to go. Like those little things are happening and sometimes maybe he does pick it, but you know, she's really like leading the dance. Even if she found you very attractive in the beginning, at a certain point in time, that attraction will be lost. She just won't feel that burning desire for you and as a result, she's going to say, hey, I just don't feel the connection. The truth is she didn't feel the man-to-woman connection with you, which is the key for desire, which means she doesn't want to sleep with you and I know it hurts when someone says that, but you don't blame yourself so much. Just look at the actions that you're taking, change your actions and usually that can change. Now that's the most common way that I've seen. There's another way that happens sometimes where the guy is, he is trying too hard to lead, to do all that sort of stuff and so it becomes kind of like a dancing monkey in front of her and it just doesn't feel, it feels incongruent because she's at a more relaxed pace and he's like doing all of this stuff and so there's a disconnect there and that's why she doesn't feel a connection because there's a disconnect. So you kind of have to find a happy medium where you're leading, but she also has the ability to walk away, right? And she has to choose to stay with you continuously. She has to choose, hey, you know, I'm gonna go to dinner with this guy. Hey, I'm gonna go after for drinks with them. I'm gonna go after and walk through the park with them. I'm gonna go after and I'm gonna do these sorts of things. She has to choose at each step of the way and sometimes a girl will make out with you at the end of the day, even though it didn't go so well. So you can't always use that as like a measure of whether it went well or not. The only measure that you can see is if she actually meets up with you. So really just have fun and do what you wanna do and lead and be relaxed. And that's really the way that you're gonna figure out if she likes you as if, you know, she texts you back in the end, you know? And ultimately it kind of sucks because you want a for sure thing, you want to know on the date. And in life, unfortunately, you don't always get that, but you can do the things that are going to give you a much higher likelihood that she's going to be interested in you. And some women, they just go on and go on dates with guys just to go on dates with guys that they have no intention of really dating. So you want to filter those women out before you actually go on a date with them. My experience is that if you talk to them a little longer before you organize it, then they'll usually drop off. So that's why I usually like to talk to women for a little bit longer before I go on a date with them. Cool, all right. Well, hopefully that helped you guys. You want to find the happy medium, establish the man to woman connection and that way she's not going to tell you that she doesn't feel a connection, okay? Embrace the masculine energy that you have within yourself and you're gonna be getting that a lot less. Cool, all right. Well, thanks for watching. If you made it to the end, consider subscribing. I come out with videos like this every single week. My name is Lloyd. Good luck out there you guys.