 My wife chose the belly tingles over our 11-year marriage and two daughters her past came back to haunt and destroy our family And it gets even more brutal warning The following story will be upsetting to cheaters Before we jump into it give the like button a compliment, but let it be an obvious lie Hi everyone. I heard it's very helpful to be here, and I hope it is I think something from my wife's past has come back to haunt me I want to talk about it with strangers because even though I think my wife is having a physical affair There's still a chance. I'm overreacting with everything going on. It looks like my wife's been unfaithful I'm a 31 year old male and have a wife of 30. We live in Detroit and have a great marriage About 11 years ago I was visiting my wife at her parents house and a best friend got in my face and asked me why I didn't put a ring on my Wife's finger yet While her best friend will call her Mandy was grilling me. My wife wasn't stopping her So I got the point pretty quick since I cared about her so much. I was happy. They felt that way After that I started to make moves to one day marry her Two years after that we got married and we now have two beautiful daughters Getting married was one of my happiest days And I'd always planned to be a good husband and father one day My wife wanted a pretty big wedding and a lot of people attended We even got some of our relatives from Puerto Rico to attend me and my wife weren't rich But we were good providers and our kids were always well looked after my wife has always been a great person She's smart fun, and she has a great sense of humor, which you don't expect from gorgeous women like her She was a good mom and our daughters who are seven and four years old love and respect her Our oldest even acts like her. This is something I would always tell her and she was beautiful I loved her pretty smile her brown eyes and especially her amazing behind She was the type of girl who struggled a little to put some jeans on and whether it was in a sexy dress or tights It was visible on her full slim figure She always loved how she looked and it caused my mom to believe she had an inflated ego She might be right, but I never really minded I work in a renovation project facility and my wife owns her own nail salon This never surprised me because she always was a fashionista which she disagreed about My wife was always up on the latest trends and had to have everything new Whether it was the new iPhone new heels name brand clothes. She had to have it This made me roll my eyes, but it was her money So I couldn't say anything until she became a parent and it made her have to cut back Instead of keeping up with the glamour girl lifestyle now she focuses more on our daughters She's now used to the last year model iPhone and cut back on designer clothes Even wearing disney characters clothes our daughters love wearing too The only time she wears her good clothes is on holidays or when we are on vacation Even though that's the case. I had to splurge less as well It didn't matter because our kids are more important. My family is my priority Everything seemed okay, but now I'm starting to see problems It started after me and my wife ran into her old friend's ex Me and our family were at the supermarket buying some groceries Our oldest reminded us about her pop tarts and my wife told me to go with her to get her favorite ones After finally making her decision on a new flavor We came back out the aisle to see my wife laughing and talking to some guy When my daughter interrupted them with the pop tarts my wife introduced me to him She said this guy apparently was the ex-boyfriend of her old friend. Let's just call her Tasha At first I couldn't remember who Tasha was Then I remembered she used to work with Tasha at some old job before my wife had started up her own business This guy we'll call him Trey seemed happy to see us and was friendly to us. So I didn't mind at first Trey and my wife caught up a little bit more and it was awkward to see her smiling all in his face And seemed a little too happy to see him again After waiting patiently I signaled it was time to cook dinner and Trey laughed saying it was good to see us On the ride home my wife told me how surprised she was to see him at the supermarket She said she was even more surprised that Tasha and Trey had broken up I asked how long it was that she spoke to Tasha and she said about four years After hearing that I had thought to myself that they definitely lost touch At first I thought that would be the last that I had heard about Trey But no as time went by I noticed that Trey and my wife kept in touch They would talk on the phone and also on her social media He would mention me every once in a while. So I thought nothing about it because I felt included They started talking more frequent and the conversations got longer even up to after hours But I started getting suspicious when Super Bowl Sunday came around On the day of the Super Bowl I asked my wife something but she was on the phone She was speaking to Trey. She answered me and went on with the call A little while later she came to me and said Trey wanted to talk to me Surprised I took the phone and asked him what's up He asked me if I was going to watch the Super Bowl and I told him I planned to When he asked me who I was going for I sarcastically said the lines Laughing he said he was too and offered to watch the game with me I told him that would be great, but we were going to have a bunch of kids over And I doubted he would want to deal with that Laughing he said never mind and I passed the phone back to my wife I thought that was the end of it but a couple hours later my wife came back and said Trey wanted to talk to me again He said if I could get away There was a Super Bowl party a friend of his was having and I could go and watch it with them My wife told me she would call her brother and tell him to pick up the kids earlier And we could go there a little later and I decided to go After her brother would pick up the kids me and my wife got ready to go and got there around the halftime show While talking to everybody I understood that the party was being thrown because some guy was a diehard Cincinnati Bengals fan The person who threw the party argued who would win and wanted the Bengals to lose He definitely got his wish and the Bengals lost to the Rams and it stopped the diehard fan from being a loudmouth After having a good laugh at this guy's expense. We all just enjoyed the get together It was at this point where I started to get more suspicious because of how my wife was interacting with Trey I didn't like how she was all in his face and I felt left out in the conversations I thought it was because I wasn't being social enough and put myself in the conversations more At some point I asked him about why him and Tasha broke up Trey said he and Tasha were just casually dating. They weren't really serious back then My wife laughed and said she was surprised because Tasha really liked him After a while I said I had to go and get another smirnoff and walk to the porch where the cooler was After mingling with some people on the porch I went back in the house Going back in the house. I was looking for my wife There I saw them talking in a corner I was about to walk over to them, but I felt a weird vibe about how they were talking He was a little too close to her and was acting all predatory with her I paused and stayed out of sight to see what was going on He held my wife's hand and she was giggling all shy After that she walked into the kitchen and he followed her while obviously looking at her behind All I could say was what the fuck But then I moved a little closer to get a good look in the kitchen Standing by the sink was my wife talking to some girl and her back was turned away from Trey While talking to my wife the girl looked at Trey and could see that he was looking at her I think she told my wife and my wife looked back and smiled at him Turning back to the girl she continued their conversation Knowing that Trey was looking at her behind so obvious as to making a statement Usually I love the way my wife dresses, but now I was feeling paranoid My wife would talk to the girl then look back and smile at Trey As he continued to take glances at my wife's bottom in her yoga pants But my wife wouldn't budge. She would just look at him like she was saying, I know you want this Even though they would try to play it off They would go back to looking at each other and you would notice if you were paying attention All I could think was, I hope I'm not seeing what I think that I'm seeing After the girl said something to my wife, she followed her back into the living room and she ended up seeing me She asked me what the guys on the porch were talking about and I told her nothing much and that I was ready to go She said she wanted to stay longer, but I reminded her that her brother was still with our kids waiting on us so he could leave Besides we both had work the day after After we said goodbye to Trey and everybody we went back home, riding back I had to tell her what I saw In the car, I told her directly that it looked like Trey was trying to hit on her and she acted like I was crazy She laughed it off and said I was wrong. I left it alone, but I wanted to start paying more attention to them from that point on I'm not crazy. I know what I saw. He was definitely looking at her ass and she was letting him The more I paid attention, the more I noticed how suspicious she was acting She always had her phone with her She always brought up to me about how Trey was doing to me and he came up when I overheard her talking to her best friend Mandy Then she started handcuffing her phone even talking early in the morning One night I saw her calling again and I grumpily asked if it was Trey. She just shot me an annoyed look And said she was After that she hung up the phone after about five minutes After a while I got tired of her talking on her phone into the night and asked her to keep the phone conversations Just during the daytime specifically the ones with him She agreed, but still kept calling during nighttime and her excuse was She talks to Mandy now Now I'm getting irritated more and when I'm not I'm not going to talk to her When I told her it was really inappropriate to talk to Trey this late at night She'd laugh at me and say I'm acting paranoid Every time I'm mentioning it directly or trying to make her stop She would dismiss it and say I'm worried about nothing However, all my questions and interference did make her stop bringing up Trey completely I guess she thought it would stop me from getting upset, but it didn't Two days ago made me believe the worst case scenario On my wife's off day. She said she was going over to her friend Mandy's house to do her mom's nails Since I knew about this a couple days ago. I really wasn't suspicious Later on that night my youngest daughter asked me if we could eat pizza But I told her that her mom was cooking dinner She made a big fuss about it And since I was in the mood for pizza as well Decided to call my wife and tell her she didn't have to cook anything When I called my wife it went straight to voicemail I tried again and the same thing happened I had to ask myself why the hell was her phone off? This never happened before I let half an hour pass to try again and her phone still went to voicemail After that, I decided to call Mandy When I call Mandy, she actually picked up I asked her if my wife was at her place and she said she left I said I thought she was going to do Mandy a favor and do her mother's nails for her Mandy said that's true but that my wife got a phone call and just left I asked her who called her and she said she didn't know She added she wasn't happy that my wife told her to ask her mom to go to the nail salon the day after anyway Just before she left This surprised me because Mandy was like a real sister to her And to hear that my wife dropped the appointment out of the blue And leaves was really unusual behavior for her After I hung up, I called around But nobody that I talked knew the whereabouts of my wife So this left me one person Trey, thinking back, I got so angry I couldn't believe this was happening At the Super Bowl party, Trey told us where he stayed But I didn't know the address, only the street If my wife was there, I knew he was doing her I was tense and ready to go there So I grabbed the keys and went for the door to walk out But then it hit me I remembered my kids were still in their room, playing Grabbing my phone, I called my mom to see if she could babysit for a while But she didn't pick up the phone My best friend, let's call him Marcus, was my last option So I called him up He came over and picked the kids up I asked him what he was doing and he said his girl was cooking dinner and he was at home I hesitated but then told him I'm about to ask for a favor, a huge favor And he asked what it was I then dropped it and told him to forget it As it's too big of a favor to ask But he didn't want to hear it and asked me again So I told him, I think my wife is cheating on me Marcus went silent Like it was the last thing he'd think I'd say He asked me if I was serious and I told him everything I knew up to that point He said that he couldn't stay at my house to watch the kids But I could bring the kids to him to drop them off This agitated me because he lived on the other side of town I must add, I was stressed After getting the kids ready to leave, it took about 30 minutes to get there At Marcus's place, he asked me if I knew where Trey lived I told him I only knew the street and he looked at me like I was crazy The street Trey lived on was a long avenue So he asked me if I really was going to drive all the way down the street to find them And I said, yeah When I was about to leave, he stopped me and told me to take his car He added that if my wife would see me, she would call me the crazy husband And besides, they won't recognize his car right off After handing me the keys, he told me not to do anything crazy in his car He asked if I wanted him to come with me But I said no It's already messed up enough that he's involved He took the kids and I made my way to try to find my wife I was hoping that I wasn't too late and that I could catch her in the act However, a part of me truly wished to be wrong about this Despite that, my instincts as a man wouldn't let me rest After a long ride, I made it down the street Trey lives on Slowing down, I tried to look for my wife Silver Keer It was a terrible neighborhood, but at this point I couldn't care less All the suspicious BS my wife was doing led me to this I was really hoping I couldn't find her car here, but eventually there it was Not only did I see her car, but I saw her and Trey as well She was wearing a pink sweatsuit And Trey was wearing nothing more than a white beater shorts and flip flops She looked like she was getting ready to leave I couldn't believe what I saw I mean the guy had practically no clothes on And the way he was standing, too close to her, is what triggered me even more Driving past I threw a fit in the car I kept saying, he freaked her, I know he did her I didn't have any other explanation except that he was doing, my wife And I bet magically her phone works now Not only did I catch her all hugged up with this guy Now I had to try and beat her home When I got home, I was surprised to see that me and the kids beat her home with time to spare After putting the kids to bed, I decided to wait up for my wife to come in Almost 40 minutes later, she came in through the door and she was acting unhappy to come back She looked over at me, walked right past me and went to the bedroom Her not saying anything really blew my mind I went after her to the bedroom and immediately asked why her phone was turned off And she told me that she had never turned it off She said her phone died and she had to charge it up Whose battery dies in the middle of the day? I asked her where she was and she said she already told me she was over at Mandy's house I told her Mandy said she left and she brushed it off like she was irritated by my questions She said that doesn't mean she wasn't there It just blew me away that I was going through this right now I asked her directly, I asked her if she left Mandy to be with Trey I saw the hesitation in her face for a brief moment before saying Yeah, I asked why she didn't say anything and she told me it doesn't matter She says she's tired of me having a problem with Trey And she just wanted me to drop it and leave it alone because she was tired She asked me if the kids had dinner and I told her we went out to eat Not even asking questions herself And she proceeded to go back to the living room to watch TV Cozying up on the couch and grabbing her phone After that night, she was no longer the same wife that I knew Now she doesn't want to talk to me completely She always texting on her phone in the dining room She gives me this look that tells me she's done She wants to get rid of me, get away from me But she can't This is bullshit Because she's acting like I did something awful to her When all I ever did was cater to all her needs I really don't know what to do And I need to make a decision based on my gut feelings I don't know for sure if she cheated But her behavior has raised a bunch of red flags I hope I'm overreacting But the signs are there Especially at the Super Bowl party They've been talking all day He's been eyecandying her at the party And she allowed it She's even meeting him at his house in secret He must be seeing her more than that I will try to update once I find something concrete But for now, I really need to know if I'm overreacting Wow, really wow Pack her a bag and have her cool tray to tell him she is coming to stay No remorse, no sorry, and lies Again, wow See a lawyer let her know and have her served If she pulls her head out, you can always call it off But the ball has to be in her court to fix this Act quickly and act decisively is the only way to go Letting it drag on will end disaster and pain Good luck She cheated and is still cheating Walk away from her and set up co-parenting Your kids are now being raised in a very toxic household Seriously brother, come on really First off, why did you let her entertain this man? Why did you go to his party? Are you truly that blind? What's wrong with you letting her constantly disrespect you like this? They are cheating and you are fine with it You have children to think of Divorce her and kick her out She can pursue belly tingles with tray without disrespecting you Don't play blind Don't stay for the kids They don't need a disrespectful mother without any morals You need to stop imagining she's someone she's not More than likely, you have been ignoring her disrespectful behavior for a long time Your marriage wasn't perfect She wasn't the perfect wife or mother If she was, she wouldn't be destroying her family for a fling Do not give her any chances She doesn't deserve it Choose yourself Choose your self-respect and self-worth She's unfaithful and most likely has always been You just don't want to see or accept it Hey man, don't victim blame OP here Your comment is way too harsh on him No, it's not People like you need to stop doing that That's not called victim blaming That's called being realistic People like you who sugarcoat everything and call tough love like this victim blaming Make the person weaker Listen, I get it I was once a dumbass who sat there and stayed with a cheater For over 20 years Calling things like that victim blaming would make Old Me feel like a victim and continue being a victim It's not called victim blaming if you are stating the obvious And calling someone out on the bullcrap Your marriage is over Never forget he called her for a booty call and she went running like a slut You should have taken pictures of them together Gather evidence and let everyone in her family know why her children will grow up in a broken home Trey is a sick manipulative narcissist It's obvious that he likes to pray on married women and destroy marriages The fact that your wife allowed him to do this Means that she's completely thoughtless and worthless as a wife Now that you know where he lives the next time she disappears unexpectedly and is unreachable Go there and catch them in the act Take videos and share them with her family and friends Now let's pretend we're both blind here and assume she didn't already sleep with him Spoiler alert, she did But for the sake of playing naive Let's act like that wasn't the case The fact that she's entertained another man to the extent that she has Right in front of you, around your girls, in your home Constantly giving him her best instead of you and the kids Is troubling Then add in being aware that another man is drooling over her at a party And instead of shutting it down, she stood there, Basked in it, and even smiled back at him as he candy-eyed her body Knowing how disrespectful this is to you Knowing you're at the party and still doing it Then lying to you to sneak off to his private residence to be alone with him She's crossed so many lines, it's ridiculous Now let's stop playing blind and see this for what it is She's undoubtedly cheating on you, both emotionally and physically I feel an incredible amount of empathy for you because I know you're angry right now But before long, that anger transforms into hurt, Humiliation, and feelings of inadequacy Just remember, Trey didn't betray you, she betrayed you with Trey Trey owes you nothing We can hope everyone is a good person with good intentions But that's just not reality He didn't take vows, nor was the sanctity of your marriage his responsibility to protect This was all her, and your feelings should not become misguided here Trey is just a test, it's your wife who voluntarily failed it What's worse is that you seem to be married to a woman who shows no remorse and no self-accountability And that makes this even harder for you She'll blame you and throw anything she can at you She will I'm really sorry, but the odds that she isn't cheating are painfully low and stacked heavily against you here I'd be questioning a lot more than just Trey right now This is probably not a first for someone who behaves the way she does so effortlessly As much as it may hurt, you really need to take this seriously to the point of protecting yourself That includes being sure of paternity concerning your girls too Once you know nothing is or ever was impossible for her to have done She's not the person you thought she was I want to thank everybody for their support and honesty in helping me People here have been guiding me through this, and it's been helpful I was going to post this weekend, but so much has happened that I had to post this update today This is definitely a crazy time for me. It's blowing me away right now how right you are about my wife At the beginning of this year, my wife ran into her friend's ex-boyfriend at the supermarket When my wife introduced me to this guy, Trey, I didn't think it was a big deal At first it seemed like she had reunited with an old friend or whatever But she seemed a little too excited to see him again After that, they kept in touch and it was beginning to be too much She started showing all the red flags and it looked really suspicious They'd talk on the phone for hours and they would like each other's pics on facebook This guy also started calling late at night When I told her all this looked inappropriate, she said I was overreacting When she spoke with him, she would laugh and giggle She would also try to teach him Spanish words since we're Puerto Rican What was worse was the Super Bowl party Trey had invited us to At the party, I caught him checking out my wife, especially her ass She had the type of ass where, if she walked past, you would wait a few seconds and then turn to look at it Eventually, she became aware of this and even caught him, but didn't do or say anything about it When I told her he was checking her out, she dismissed that too It got to the point where I had to try and find her last week because she wasn't where she claimed she was She was supposed to go over to her best friend Mandy's house to do Mandy's mom's nails But flaked on her after Trey called Since my wife's phone went straight to voicemail, I assumed she was with Trey I had to call my best friend Marcus and he let me borrow his car to find her Driving down Trey's street. I found them and it bothered me that he practically had no clothes on He was wearing just a white beta some shorts and what looked like flip-flops Then I waited for her to come home and the rest happened, but I forgot to add the following Going back to the moment I saw them in Trey's street I drove back to Marcus's house when I got there. He asked me what I saw I told him and even he admitted that he thinks she slept with Trey I told him I thought so too, especially since Trey had so few clothes on If I was dressed that way and somebody came over my wife would tell me to put some clothes on He looked like he had just woken up or something. I'm emphasizing this as it's important Marcus asked me what I planned on doing, but I didn't really know at the time I just wanted to be home quick So after that I thanked him for babysitting my kids and surprisingly made it home almost 40 minutes before my wife did When she came back she looked guilty When I asked where she was she was super vague and wouldn't answer me directly Eventually I just had to drop it, especially since I didn't catch them in the act like I planned to People here said it was going to get worse and it did Now she looks at me like I'm her prison guard and doesn't really want to talk to me She only talks to her friends on her phone and doesn't interact with the kids treating them as if they're a chore She just sits in our small dining room area and texts. I didn't even know what to say to her What was even worse was that thanks to my schedule, I couldn't really stop her from cheating My wife knew my everyday routine and I'm sure Trey did too Between my job taking care of our kids and obligations to my mom They apparently met up while I was out. I know this because while I was out I would try to call her and she never answered My wife's schedule was more flexible than mine, especially since she was her own boss Thanks to her nail salon Whenever I got back home, my wife wouldn't be there Especially if she didn't have to pick up the kids from school and when she came back She would be vague about where she was This really messed with my mind and gave me what I think is anxiety I would be with my mom and I would be thinking of my wife with another man The thoughts going through my head were way more explicit than I can mention here But you can imagine what I was thinking she was doing And this was ever since she left Trey's house that night If it wasn't for this community, I would have been a lot worse off If I'd been blindsided by this, I don't know what my mindset would have been But after I was told to calm down and start monitoring them for the truth, I had to man up After doing just that, I was able to get the truth and found out today that, yes, Trey was sexy timing with my wife And my plan? It worked out perfectly That weekend after work, I bought a VR and put it in her car At first, I tested it out when I took the kids to eat at McDonald's and it worked pretty well After that, I placed it in my wife's car Since it's possible he was intimate with her in the car, it should pick that up It should even pick up any talk or incriminating conversations they might be having Doing this made me feel crazy and I couldn't believe this was my life now The most important advice I think I received was to act like I wasn't concerned about Trey It was a lie, but I think I need to start getting used to it Not bringing him up and acting like everything was good caused her to let her guard down a bit It was hard, but I kept my focus on uncovering the truth I needed someone I knew to talk to and confided in Marcus So he knew about this and thought it was a great plan A few days ago, I snuck out and retrieved the VR recording from her car and listened to what was on it I heard a few things, but I definitely heard her talking with Trey in her car The one thing that stood out was that they were driving somewhere The music was playing, but I could still somewhat make out what they were saying He was definitely flirting with my wife and calling her sexy My wife was giggling I recognized her giggling But I couldn't make out what she was saying, but it wasn't interfering with what he was saying I heard him tell her to stop somewhere and things went silent for a minute Then it sounded like several guys entered the car and they drove off It became harder to hear them with everyone engaging in their own conversations It sounded like she was driving them to various places Through all their noisy nonsense I heard him say he was trying to come over later For a second I couldn't hear the conversation, but I definitely heard my wife say to Trey She has to leave early, so come over That was pretty much the end of the useful information from the recording in her car They just talked and laughed and one guy referred to Trey as thirsty After that, I tried to figure out who my wife was referring to when she mentioned someone leaving early I thought it might be Mandy But even though Mandy was like a sister to her, it didn't seem like she had told Mandy about Trey She definitely wasn't talking about her mom, so it had to be the girl who ran the salon with my wife It didn't make much sense to me because she was a teenager learning to do nails there But it was the best lead I had Nobody else made sense I called up my friend Marcus to see if we could swap cars for the day And he said yes After telling him what I had heard on the recording He was shocked, called her a high priced hoe and said he hoped I would catch her this time Knowing my habits, she would surely leave after me I went to my mom, but since I couldn't cancel on her I told my mom I'd only stay for a little while because I was tired from work My mom was upset with me for leaving early But her next door neighbor assured her he could handle helping her with her garden Around nine, I pulled up to my wife's shop just as it was closing It's located in a strip mall, so I could easily blend in with the other cars thanks to Marcus Inside, Trey was definitely present and I was upset to realize I was right The only ones left inside were my wife, Trey, and a woman I'll refer to as Sherry My wife was clearly dressed to impress and Trey was all over her I saw Trey was behind my wife with his arms wrapped around her while they were talking After about 20 minutes, they really started to get into it Trey was kissing my wife's neck and grabbing her behind After trapping her against the wall, it was clear they were kissing What's strange was that Sherry just watched them After about five minutes, Sherry must have said something about leaving And they smiled and waved her off Taking Trey's hand, they walked off to the back Where it looked like they were going down into the basement area I've been down in the basement area when she first started up the salon So I knew that was the only thing in the back She was looking for a bigger place to run her shop so she could have an office space The place she's at now wasn't high-end looking enough for her If she doesn't know anything, she knows how to market something I was so pissed off, I can't lie I really can't believe this woman would do this to me I did so much for her and she would do this to me Trey was definitely a real snake He never gave me good vibes about him and I now see why After I grabbed the recording device, I made my way over to the salon Sherry had just finished grabbing her things So I waited for her to come out before I made my presence known When I called out to her, she looked like she saw a ghost in front of her I told her not to lock the doors and that I knew everything She claimed she didn't know what I was talking about And I said I watched them the whole time I said more than that, I called her a fat lying skank And we got into a huge argument She said I shouldn't blame her for my wife's sexy timing another man To which I called her cheap and demanded her to get out of my way When I went in, she told me I wasn't going to be able to catch them in the act Because the door was locked I asked her why they would lock it If she would be in on their affair already Sherry said they didn't want anybody coming down After entering her shop, I grabbed my phone and called my wife Apparently, Sherry decided to follow me in while I had made my way to the back My wife didn't answer my call So I surprised her by banging on the basement door since it was actually locked I didn't know what was going on down there But I knew if she didn't come up, we were over After banging on the door three times and telling them to come up They still didn't come from the basement Turning back to Sherry, I asked her how long she knew about this Sherry swore she had known about Trey for about a month And that my wife had started cheating with him recently She said he came in on her break and after a while they went down to the basement She said the next day they talked about what happened I asked her if she knew that was Tush's ex-boyfriend And she said my wife had told her I told Sherry we had kids And she said she didn't have anything to do with that I said that's fine And that I'll be using what she said in court When Sherry asked me what I was talking about I showed her the VR device and told her she is free to go home now Getting back in the car, I drove back to Marcus Who was a big help with not just the car but watching the kids too I told him what I saw and he and his girlfriend consoled me During our talk, Mandy had called my phone This was the last thing I needed but I should have expected it I decided to pick up and she said my wife told her everything And that my wife wanted to talk to me tomorrow I told her to put her on the phone now But Mandy said she won't let me talk to her now She knew I was going to blow up on her I repeated to her that I wanted to speak to my wife But Mandy hold ground and wouldn't put her on Mandy added that if I came over she'd call the police She said I had to wait till tomorrow And she was going to make my wife call me She wanted for us both to calm down I said yeah whatever and just hung up After coming back home with the kids I got super emotional Not only that my anxiety started kicking in again I still can't believe this is happening to me Even after I did everything right for this woman Somehow, somewhere I did it wrong I thought after being married for this long I was sure I didn't have to worry about this happening The worst thing that's messing with my brain Is that this isn't even a one-time thing I know they are doing it consistently Now my whole world is just messed up I can't wait to see what she has to say tomorrow I will update when I hear what she has to say The ball is in her court And if I don't like what I hear I'm getting us a divorce My mind is racing And I think it may have been a bad idea to leave Marcus's house I feel alone but I had to post here to vent And since everybody wanted to know exactly what my wife was doing You need to be careful now Do not meet with your wife alone Ask someone to be there Not Mandy, not Trey, but someone that is on your side In her mind she is already in court with you And if you meet alone with her now Then she can tell everyone that you hit her Threatened her or whatever So don't meet alone with her now And always keep the VR device charged and with you Go to a doctor and get tested for STDs now At best you call Mandy again and tell her That you are not interested in talking with your wife And that you will get in contact with a lawyer So that she can talk with him Show her that she just lost you Then meet with a lawyer Don't let your wife make the rules of this game Because then you will lose If she wants to talk with you Then she has to ask you when you have time And where you want to meet Not the other way around with her telling you when to talk Take back the control of the situation and your life Stay in close contact with Marcus and get support from him Tell your friends and family about what she did So that you can get more support Meet with a lawyer and do exactly what the lawyer tells you to do Skip out on alcohol and drugs They won't help you Drink plenty of water and eat healthy Even if you have to force yourself to eat From now on, remember this in all you do You and your wife no longer share a common goal She is working against you and will do whatever she can To make everyone believe that this all is your fault She will tell people how you neglected her We're abusive and cold towards her Prepare for that Reach out to people and tell them about her affair Before she starts to spread her lies around You are worth so much more than to be treated this way I want to highlight here once again That you should not talk to her tomorrow You need time for yourself now to process what she did And to protect yourself If you talk with her Then all you will hear are reasons why you are at fault Why she cheated on you and how she had no other choice Lies and more lies is all you will get Tell her to stay at Mandy's place Or that she can go to her lover if she wants to You don't care Until you processed what she did See her for who she is and no longer for who you thought she was You should not meet with her or talk to her Instead meet and talk with a doctor and a lawyer now There is nothing to say but you need to divorce her You need to get out of reactionary mode And start being proactive about moving on with your own life Sure talk to her But incorporate everything she says into your own decision making process Don't wait on her for anything Consult with an attorney Make plans for the kids There's really not much she can say at this point And what she will say will be nothing more than excuses And blame shifting Bro what the f Divorce is clearly the only way Pick yourself respect Your kids are watching You said the ball is in her court Nope to that You ghost her call You have nothing to say to her And nothing she can say can make things better You go see a lawyer and serve her with divorce papers She's not your wife anymore She's trace free call girl that's it No offence But what exactly are you hoping to get out of the conversation I feel like she's either just gonna tell you she's ready for a divorce Or some bullcrap What's your end game Because you sound like you're willing to be convinced if you like what you hear Come on dude Hello everybody I really want to thank everybody for their support these past couple of weeks Everybody seemed to really be concerned about me talking to my wife after I caught her cheating And assumed I was going to immediately reconcile with her after what she put me through I can't lie I did want to know what my wife could possibly say to justify her actions I was in a bad state of mind And kind of still am Ever since my wife and I ran into Trey Who I can now call her a fair partner at the grocery store Things went south It's hard to forgive that Especially since I had to practically chase this woman across the city Now that I have multiple confessions on my VAW device There's nothing anybody can tell me about what's been happening since the beginning of this year Thanks to this community I was able to confront this even though I may have stumbled a little at first But I'm super embarrassed at how this ended After I busted Trey and her kissing during after hours in her nail salon I got a call from her best friend Mandy She said that my wife wanted to explain the next day and I agreed to it The next day came and my wife never called me That was fine with me because I was in the middle of calling everybody to let them know about her cheating And I called a lawyer After talking to a recommended lawyer online I was supposed to call him back because he was leaving the office at the time And he had questions for me later After that I took my kids to my mom's house because she demanded that they stay with her for the weekend My mom blamed this situation on me claiming it was because I married that woman And she said she didn't trust me with the kids right now My aunt came in from the kitchen and asked why my mom was raising her voice My mom explained the situation to my aunt who looked extremely shocked Throwing her hands up she sat on my mom's couch and unmuted the tv Which my mom had muted in order to scold me Even though my mom came down on me hard I was happy she was taking the kids I had a lot going on in my head and being by myself helped me get my thoughts together And let it all out since I was still angry My friend Marcus called me too and asked if I'd spoke to my wife I told him no and that she was probably enjoying a popsicle somewhere He said she may not even call which was fine with me I was just preparing to move on On Saturday I was trying to clean my house and I heard my wife's keys in the door I really must have been not paying attention to anything Because I should have heard her car pull up My wife her friend Mandy walked in and it caught me by surprise She definitely didn't look like her normal self Because she was wearing a gray Nike sweatsuit No makeup and her hair wasn't combed and held together by a rubber band The shame on her face showed remorse Probably for the fact that she had got caught I wasn't used to seeing her like this She was usually a well put together woman and breath taking to look at Maybe this was only a privilege for Tre now She clearly liked the way he was checking her out And the way she looks wearing yoga pants Like I caught Tre dropping obvious looks at the party Sorry for rambling back to what happened After walking into our house Mandy asked me to let my wife speak Pleased to just let her speak I said that's fine After that Mandy said something to my wife and went out on the porch I told my wife I was surprised she came and even bothered to talk to me She said she felt like she needed to after I saw her and Tre at her salon She said after that she was scared to come back home She asked where the kids were and I told her they were with my mom She looked down disappointed as if that wasn't what she wanted to hear She said she was mad about me telling Sherry to come clean about everything she knew about Tre and her I told her that I didn't have to I told her after Sherry got caught She immediately ratted her out to save her own skin My wife said they got into an argument and Sherry hasn't come back to work I told her that she got caught cheating with her pants down And I don't care about the Sherry situation and her having a big mouth My wife threw up her hands and said I was right and said she didn't want to fight She said she was sorry and she didn't want me to find out about her cheating with Tre I told her saying sorry wasn't going to make it okay and that she betrayed me I asked her how she could parade this guy around me Acting like he's just a friend and then throw our relationship in the garbage She said she was sorry and she let her fantasies with Tre get out of hand She said when her old friend Tasha was dating him she always told my wife how great he was She would always say how handsome he was and she would show my wife all the spicy texting Tasha and Tre did while they were at work The next day Tasha and my wife would talk about it and my wife loved hearing about it She said when Tre came to their job to pick her up she saw Tre and had a crush on him After talking about Tre with Tasha she knew she liked him I asked her if she already talked to Tre at that time. She said he complimented her a few times, but that was it I told her I knew something was off because when we ran into Tre at the supermarket I don't remember her giving him her phone number She said he asked for it and he began texting her and started flirting with her again Then it turned to spicy texting. She said after that she started hanging out with him and some of his friends I asked her about the day when she was supposed to be doing Mandy's mom's nails, but she went to Tre's house I named off his street to let her know I knew exactly where he lived She asked how I knew this and I told her I went looking for her and saw her with him outside that night She didn't answer so I asked her again She said yes, and I directly asked her if they already had sex before that point All she could say was that she was sorry She said that when he called her he told her everyone was there hanging out And he convinced my wife to ghost Mandy in order to spend time with them When she arrived she waited for more people to show up But tre eventually admitted that he had just wanted her to be alone with him I asked her why she didn't leave at that point and she said she knew what he was after She admitted that he became very touchy with her and started kissing her She admitted that things got out of hand between them and she didn't put a stop to it After that I called her a stupid skank and that she destroyed our marriage for trash She said she was sorry. I told her I could never trust her again But then she said she wasn't asking me to I asked what she meant by that. She said she wanted to pursue a relationship with tre I told her she was nutjob crazy and she said no, I really want to She said she always fantasized about tre and she didn't think it mattered until we ran into him that day She said when he told her that him and Tasha weren't ever serious It actually made her happy Especially after he started flirting with her again She said she secretly hoped something would happen and then it did when she went to his house that night She said while it was happening she wanted to feel bad, but she didn't After that he would call her to hang out and she said it would happen spontaneously From then on it was planned dates She said she should have talked to me about it instead of going behind my back with tre She said that I didn't deserve it and this was the better way to go about it. I couldn't believe it I told her again that she's seriously crazy and asked her if she is serious about wanting to leave her family behind For this guy She said it's not just a guy It's a feeling she always had about him and she wished she pursued it before being married to me She told me tre also wanted a relationship with her Especially now tre knows about her being more into him than her own husband I couldn't believe it I asked her if she was freaking his friends too and that's when she called me crazy I told her it would make sense because I know she's been riding around town with them She said that tre would sometimes call her out of the blue and tell her to pick his friends up and then give them a ride somewhere I asked her now if she became some kind of free uber and she just rolled her eyes She said it just happened and I just said whatever My wife said she wanted out of our marriage because she didn't want to be married to me while thinking about somebody else I asked her what tasha would think about her wanting to be with tre She said they were just casually dating at the time and she wouldn't care now I told her that's true, but tasha would think less of her as a friend and she would be right My wife repeated saying she didn't want to argue. She wanted to end this on good terms After that she left with mandy who kept peeking her head in and out during the conversation we had They drove back to god knows where as much as I didn't want to agree with my wife She was right. I would hate being married to her and knowing she'd rather be with another guy She was very delusional, but I'd rather leave her trying to find out for herself After that living in the house by myself was even harder I was definitely pissed off at the pure embarrassment of the situation Is this what relationships are like now? Is it that easy to throw your marriage away like this? I honestly thought being married for over a decade would mean we didn't have to worry about these things When monday came I called off work to meet with a lawyer and filed for divorce Somebody said I could get alimony from my wife's nail salon and he said if the kids want to live with me That's doable too My mom has been a big help with the kids But I found out my mom spoiled my kids while they were with her and also already told them that their mother was leaving the family To go live somewhere else When my oldest asked me all I could do was shake my head thanks to my mom I had to tell them now and they didn't take it well Now they knew might as well use it in my favor So after picking up my kids we rolled past tre's house and I showed my kids That's where their mom wants to live I asked them if they want to live with her in that house They both looked at the rickety house with a bunch of guys standing on the porch and said no I asked if they were sure and my oldest said not for a million dollars I called my wife during my lunch break today and told her that I had already filed for the divorce and all she said was okay She mentioned that she wanted to come over and talk to the kids So I told her that my mom was picking them up from school today because I had things to do My wife said she really wanted to talk to them and I replied that when I get home She can come over and I'll ask my mom to bring them back after spending time with her She asked if she could just pick up the kids and I told her that if she wants to see the kids so badly She should go over to my mom's house and pick them up However, I warned her that it might not be the smartest thing to do My wife got upset and said I always hide behind my mom So sure I told her that if she wants to see the kids to just go over to my mom's house If she's feeling that bold, I'm not going to protect her Giving a frustrated sigh. She hung up clearly knowing how petty my mom can be She didn't go to pick the kids up since then I haven't heard from my wife I sent her one last text saying all we need to talk about from here on out Is the divorce and our kids from time to time Right now I'm only thinking about my daughter's lives Just because my wife gave up on them doesn't mean they're alone I know for a fact trey wouldn't give up his playboy life I hope while she's busy monkey branching to a loser and ditching her children The thought of her inevitable doom pops in her mind It's not my problem anymore. And like I said, I'll let her worry about what might happen I really want to thank everybody here for the amazing support I was definitely scared to go down this road and it did made me braver I heard stories way worse than mine like some catching them in the act Which would have destroyed me completely I'm not over it right now, but I'm definitely coming back from this crap one day My soon-to-be ex-wife is very flawed and she's extremely selfish How could she break all her standards for this douchebag and force me to abide by them? It's a question I've been hearing from good men lately and it seems unfair This is my last update and I want to thank you guys one more time Some women are just for the streets She's gonna end up regretting her decision And I hope you're gonna have a really good laugh about it when that happens She pretty much lost everything her kids and her husband All to be another side chick too and be dumped by a bigger piece of trash than her Don't ever take that woman back, bro. And I wish you and your kids all the best going forward She's gonna beg for you back when she realizes trey is using her So sad he makes her be a chauffeur She's dignitized, but it wears off Unless his next thing is getting her hooked on the forbidden skittles Do not let your girls be alone around him as well Please be very careful. Keep your kids safe Do not let trey anywhere near your daughters and as long as she is with trey She should only be allowed supervised visitation She's a pushover and she won't stick up or protect the children Good riddance You got her a fair partner trey to take out the trash from your house and your life You deserve better than that lowdown ducked up ex and you are right She let her standards go down low into the gutter Gut feelings say that trey is a womanizer and he'll won't stop with your wife Mark my words. She'll live to regret it. Go through your divorce process and use a good lawyer Sue both of them, especially trey and make them pay for cheating on you and ruining your marriage Do yourself a favor. Do not let them off easy after what they have put you through All the best op That wraps this story up A marriage of 11 years with two daughters and this kind man had to suffer through the brutal selfishness of the mother of his children The commenters brought great value to op during his story I hope he takes it to heart and becomes a stronger man in his future endeavors But here's my question to you What would you do when the past comes knocking threatening everything you hold dear? How would you hold your family together? Where would you have drawn the line? Let us know down below. I'll join the conversation Before you go Give the like button a compliment, but let it be an obvious lie Thank you for watching royal ai. I appreciate you for staying all the way till the end See you in the next one