 Hello everyone, welcome again to another NARC survivor live video. We've just checked into this room Just did a TikTok video as well. In this one we are going to be talking about something you do that the narcissist really hates something they really can't stand Because there is something that you need to understand about narcissist. I Mean this is kind of basic information really it's nothing Advanced nothing that I haven't spoken about so many times already Since the very beginning of this channel But to put it quite simply Narcissist they do know exactly What they are doing They understand the effects that their behavior is having on you They do see the difference in you. I Mean, it's kind of like think about think about it like this if you've been going to the gym Every day for months You're not really going to see the difference in yourself that much Because you're with yourself every day And maybe you're always looking in the mirror Whereas with the narcissist They've seen what you were like Before they came around you and then they're noticing the effects that their behavior is having on you So of course, yes, they are well aware of Every little change every little thing that you go through Yes, of course, they are well aware of that they completely understand What their behavior is doing to you Anything where you go wrong you go off track Where you get angry you get upset you react in a way that is of character Yes, they do know they do notice that they are not Completely insane or completely detached from reality Although yes, of course at times they may act crazy foolish aggressive I mean just the envy alone is enough to make them react in such a silly and Weird way Aside from that they do know the difference. They see the difference in you as time goes by And they are deliberately manipulating and controlling you to Make you less powerful and easier to control So that they're able to get their narcissistic supply Where it validates the illusions of their false self So that they can feel powerful important attractive desirable or whatever else they may want to feel Because that is all they really care about that is the only thing that matters to them They don't really care about anything else They don't care about you or what happens to you how it affects or impacts your Character your way of behaving Of course, they don't care about that. I mean I'm sure all of you who are watching this right now. Yeah, the narcissist has seen you Change completely over a course of time And they didn't care about that. They never took any responsibility for it. They blamed you for everything For everything that they did to you for all of the ways that they changed you That was always your fault And at the same time they were actually molding you into the type of person that they needed you to be That was the purpose of it And I would go as far as to say that Anyone who is involved with a narcissist? I mean you can look at that person before the relationship. It could have been a very Happy go in positive cheerful person. They could have been relatively normal, but then look at them in The middle of the relationship and towards the end the very different And that person you see towards the end of the relationship with the narcissist That person is everything the narcissist needed them to be the narcissist Specifically And intentionally molded that person Into the character that they became by the end of it They molded you to be that on purpose deliberately So that you could fuel them and be their source of supply and that's why it's really Pretty obvious to tell if someone is going through narcissistic abuse. You can really see the changes I mean the changes in them are blatantly obvious All of the signs will be there. They will be Maybe a bit more anti-social shy with drone with drawn into introverted They may seem less confident in themselves. I mean it will just affect everything about them It really will the way that they carry themselves their body language the way they talk It will affect all of these things They may even be quite slow to respond As though they always have to think of what to say before they set they're always walking on eggshells Because the narcissist changes us completely By the end of the relationship. We're like a completely different person To who we were at the beginning if you look back at the beginning however many years That you were with them You will remember that you were completely different And if there's any videos of you before Any photos you can see You were a different person You were very different back then because now they've molded you into who they need you to be and that brings me To the title of this video And what they really hates it's something that you do That they can't stand and before I reveal this very important information to you Please remember to hit that thumbs up button down below It's very important as it will help to get this message out there to other survivors as well Who may need to see this but again here's what they hate That you do This is something they really do not like at all. They really despise it. They can't stand it And it is when you have any type of passion when you really love Something or it could be someone as well and you have all of this energy and enthusiasm towards it Yes, they can't stand it when you have that when you do that They really hate that about you they want all of that to be directed towards them And they want to completely drain it out of you until by the end of it I'm sure many of you you're already like this around them whenever that around you You look and feel just like a lifeless zombie like the expression on your face. It's just like a blank stare Like there's just no response and it's because you're just not used to it There's a lot of banging coming from this ceiling. So I'm gonna go outside here for now Extremely distracting but yes, because you're you're just not used to being treated like a normal person You know where someone would normally talk to you and You know they don't care about what you have to say Your feelings your emotions Your ideas your opinions your beliefs You know, they normally might take an interest in you as a person With a narcissist you're just an object You just exist to serve them to meet their needs to regulate their emotions To validate the illusion To make them feel powerful and important Attractive and desirable So by the end of it, it's like the life is sucked out of you All of the energy is gone And I know it was like that for me and it is like that. It's just a natural It's just instinctual for me. Whatever. I'm around someone and I know this is a narcissistic person Automatically I go from being this Fun happy carefree person that I know what I am and I just shut down completely and And Yeah, I may just look like just like a zombie just blank stare just No life on my face at all. I'm sure many of you do that automatically as well. You just straight away you go to the grey rock and Before you even found out about the grey rock on YouTube or whatever you found out about it You may have found that you were doing that already naturally. I know I was Because we learn we know that exactly what they're trying to do They want that emotional reaction Their narcissistic supply They don't care about who we are as a person that does not matter to them They view us as an object that they manipulate and abuse to get the reaction that they want So that they can Dial up the kind of feeling or emotion That they want to feel in that moment Which can change from moment to moment it just depends on whatever it is that they want to feel That's why they hate it when you Take control You take charge of your own life Your own emotions Your own ideas opinions and beliefs and you have that passion fire in your heart Where you Love something you have this enthusiasm towards someone or something and it makes you feel powerful Influential as though you have the ability to change do or be something Yes, they hate that about you They hate it when you do that Because they see it as though that's just taken away Any influence or control that they would otherwise have over you And that's all that it really is because with the intensive Courses of indoctrination and brainwashing That they're trying to put you through Of course, they want to be your only source of influence They don't want there to be any other outside sources That could disrupt the message that they're trying to send to you To what they want to make you believe about yourself or about them Or about other people or the world around you They don't want anything else to disrupt that Transmission that signal that they are trying to send to you That's why they really hate your passion and you may find that they hate anything That you do that is outside of their influence and control It's getting a bit noisy over here as well people walking around Trying to come back in the room Through the bang and once that again Yeah, that's um Other things that they really hate Where it comes to your passion Other sources of influence that could be anything that you enjoy anything that you are Emotionally invested in To where it has your attention your focus your interest It could be something Like reading a book Watching a TV series a movie It could even be your work Just anything that you're absorbed in any kind of hobby or interest Any kind of activity that you enjoy that you are absorbed in They hate all of these things unless they can find a way to bring it back into their realm Where they are then able to control it and Manipulate it so that they can gain some Advantage over you To where they then have control of your mind and you may find that they do this I've talked about this in previous videos. Yes They will use music Any kind of whatever you are Interested in they will use it To manipulate you They will create these subliminal messages And they may even go as far as to if they know that you are About to listen to a certain song Or you're about to watch a certain television television show They will actually take the time to listen to that song or to watch that entire TV show before you do So that they know Exactly what you're going to be receiving through your eyes through your ears in the sound and in that way they can create these subliminal messages and it may be through Anything that you are seeing or hearing Any kind of words that you're listening to Any kind of characters that you're seeing on the television in the movie and then You're thinking about them When you would otherwise be watching this television show or listening to Your favorite music Now instead it's taking your mind your attention your focus back to them When you may have just been trying to distract yourself from them So you see how they just they hate it When you're thinking about anything other than them They want to be your only source of influence The only thing that you're ever thinking about and if you're ever thinking about anything else or involved in anything else They want to try and manipulate and control that as well and leave these subliminal messages So that even then it still takes your attention and focus back to them Even though It may not even be anything that they're interested in that they even care about It may not hold any significance or relevance to them But they will find a way to get themselves into it and If you ever really like look back At how they they've done that it will really Make you laugh sometimes I mean it could be something where you're just watching a Movie Are they imply to you that they think they look like the main character or something stupid like that And then it's like every time you watch that movie now you're thinking about them But then you think about it and if you were to tell someone like your friend about how They're meant to look like this main character in the movie It would just sound ridiculous. It wouldn't make any sense Especially if you imagine that if the main character actually met the narcissist They'd be thinking You think you look like me Or you think that you are Anything to do with me at all Because that's probably how it would go down of course But they managed to manipulate your mind To where it's like anything that you're interested in anything that you're passionate about They managed to get To get it to where it's relevant to them To where it's connected to them and then you just can never Get your mind off of them, which is of course not going to be any good for you and they know that because I Mean their low value. They have nothing to offer to you They're not of any good to you So your your minds could be on them all you want or all they want It's never going to result in a favorable outcome for you Because they just they need you You do not need them. You never needed them. They were never any good for you They targeted you for supply, but yeah, everything they do is manipulation and control It's all to get into your mind to affect you emotionally To get you to react to give them their supply To validate the illusions of their false self That's all they care about. That's all that it's intended to do And that's all that it really is So of course they hate it when you do this When you're passionate about anything This is why they can't stand it when you're trying to leave when you're trying to move on You're trying to go no contact Especially if you've met someone else They will do anything they can to try to sabotage that relationship The last thing they want is for you to have any passion or purpose for anyone else Even if you have broken up When you're trying to leave They really don't like that Because they want all of that energy and attention to be directed towards them They don't want to see you falling in love with anyone else Or sharing something that is outside of their influence and control Because that just completely takes away their supply and all they care about is their supply They don't care about anything else All of these things they said about you about how you're not good enough You'll never be good enough for anyone or anything Try Try to be good enough in their Their terms of how they see it try to be that Try to be good enough for trying to be good for someone else Whatever they say and is wrong with you try to change or fix it And watch how they respond That's when you will see the real problem because the real problem is that they don't like it They don't want you to be better or to be good To be greater and anything That's the last thing they want They want to keep you down. They want to keep you small Because then they can manipulate and control you And keep you as this source of supply And that is something that you need to understand Those of you you're seeking the narcissist validation and approval The more you try to be better the more they hate you. They can't stand it Yeah, they love to complain about it. They'll have to put you down. They love to Isolate you and triangulate you with other people. Yeah, they love to do that But they don't want you to actually try to fix what they're saying is the problem with you They don't actually want you to do that They just want you to stay down and just Take everything that they pummel you with All of these insults and put downs and everything that's meant to be wrong with you These are all double binds If you're not familiar with the double buying tactic, please search it on YouTube You weren't damned if you do or if you don't No matter what you do there is no winning with a narcissist Whether you win or lose you still lose Because if you win then they will try to sabotage you they will try to put you back to push you down again Because that's not really what they want they just want to take the opportunity to Label you as bad crazy or wrong and to go up and tell everyone about it To smear you but they don't actually want you to go out and fix everything that they're saying is wrong Because then that means there's no problem Then that means that They should be on good terms with you They shouldn't be doing any of the things that they are doing and it just kind of makes them look bad because If there's nothing wrong with you Now there needs to be nothing wrong with them. They need to be In a good position as well. That's not something they can do because they have a Disorder this is why there has to be things wrong with you Because as long as they can get everyone to focus on you Then no one's looking at them and thinking That they could be the source of it That they could be the brute cause of the issue. That's why they hate Your passions your interests Your energy and a theosgasm they hate everything Good everything positive about you because all of these things make them look bad It's this black-away mentality that they have where a person is either all good or all bad right or wrong perfect or flawed And it's either you or them Whenever they try to get you in that moment. It's this child's mind This black-away mentality that they've never grown out of Since they were a child Where it's like You're bad So now that means that I am good You're wrong so now that means I'm right You're flawed so now I'm perfect as crazy as it sounds or you're powerless I'm powerful You're insignificant You're irrelevant you're unimportant So then they are Relevant important significant That's really how they think But then that's how they get their supply from doing that That's why they hate anything good or positive about you Because remember that child's mind the black-away mentality if there's anything positive or good about you That must mean that they're bad. They're negative. They're no good They're flawed and then for them It's not just that they feel guilt as though they've done something wrong It's more just shame When they feel that they're a bad person and That is what they are trying to avoid feeling or reflecting on That's why they've got to keep you down Try to destroy your passions or interests or to try to Gain influence and control over them to where even when you're engaging them you're still Constantly thinking about them because they've got you to connect these things to them whether it's certain words and a song or a Character in a movie whatever it may be They've managed to get you to connect it to them to where you're still thinking about them Even when you're watching a movie reading a book listening to music wherever it may be Like you're passionate about that you enjoy doing This is what they have to do to keep you under their control As their source of supply That's why they hate it whenever you're passionate about anything because that's really good for you As I've said before passion is very healing when you're passionate about something. It really heals you Gives you energy. It gives you life It gives you focus. It gives you drive and it takes away their power and control over you Which is why of course they don't like it They can't stand it Unless all of our energy and enthusiasm is directed towards them Then they're quite comfortable with it, but even then after a while they might want to keep it down Because I can make them look bad as well If you're constantly directing all of this energy and enthusiasm towards them, but then they can't reciprocate it Then it makes them look bad. So they still want to kind of keep that down But yeah, that's it. That's the message for today I hope you found it helpful. If you did you can show your love and support down below By giving it a thumbs up Very important as it does help the YouTube algorithm To get this message out there to other viewers So if you haven't hit the thumbs up button yet, please do that. It will only take you two seconds and also Hit that subscribe button and click all notifications so that you will be notified of my future videos Let me know what you thought about this video as well in the comment section and Read your comments every day and if you would like to book a one-on-one coaching session with me Just go to my website. It is narksabiver.co.uk Also, follow me on Instagram. It's narksabiver YouTube. Okay, that's it for this video There is a premiere beginning in a few hours so Make a note of that if you Decide to join us there and I will be live again tomorrow So until then you all have a great day I will talk to you soon