 This video I'd like to talk about active listening before we get to the specifics. So let me ask you this Does this remind you of active listening? Does this make you think of what what kind of listening is this when you're Person's kind of staring off in the space. Maybe daydreaming. Is that appropriate for active listening? Would you say or or how about this how much active listening do you think is going on here as opposed to how much? listening related to Defending yourself and just coming up with an extra response and and not really focusing on what the other person is saying But focusing on your own personal responses. Is that active listening? Or finally is this active listening? Does this give you the impression of active listening somebody that's really? Zoned in paying attention focused on what the other person is saying, you know, well, yes This would be the most as far as we can tell the most Identifiable instance of active listening of the ones that I showed you so Let's let's take a look at what we mean by active listening active listening First of all is the is providing full focus and concentration on the words Nonverbal behaviors and other contextual clues provided by the sender in an effort to understand Respond to and remember what is being said So that's a mouthful, but basically what we're getting at here is that active listening takes in the whole context Not just what the person is saying but how they're saying it what they're what they're doing non verbally in that instance and everything else related to That situation it takes it all in And and our goal here is to not just understand but also to respond to and remember what is being said I mean there's a lot happening in active listening So To focus in on this we want to focus on the three a's of active listening attention attitude and Adjustment and so just a couple tips here that I want to give you about the three a's of active listening and how we can pursue active listening Through these three a's first of all we want to provide our attention the speaker We want to face that person make sure that we're facing that person We want to maintain eye contact with that person although again not in a creepy way You don't want to just bore in on them to stare at them like this But you know really overall we should have eye contact with them more than anything else We don't want to interrupt let that person speak when we want to take it in We want to try and understand it and process it and while we're doing that we can paint a mental picture That can help us listen actively as that person is talking we can kind of construct what they're saying in our mind In an effort to help us understand that more thoroughly and more effectively It's we want to give this person our full attention. That's the short end of this We want to give them our full attention during the duration of their what they're saying We also need to think about our attitude as we enter into active listening We need to think about our attitude We want to use empathy and try and take their perspective as much as possible. We want to ask questions only to clarify Not to expand in a different areas of conversation or different things like that ask questions only to clarify What they're saying if there's something you don't understand ask a question about it, but otherwise Limit our questions. Don't impose your solution You know, it's a natural tendency for some of us to kind of say well Here's what I would do in this situation or here's what I think you ought to do or here's a potential solution Lots of times people don't want us to fix it and they certainly don't want us to fix it If we don't understand it fully so for the moment, we're not going to impose our solution We're going to listen fully so that we understand the situation and what that person is saying and then we're going to reflect on that We're going to really give it some thought we're going to think and you know It doesn't mean we have to think for days or weeks or whatever But we need to really reflect and be thoughtful before we respond So we're going to take some time to reflect so our attitudes need to be in the proper place for that That's not necessarily those things that I mentioned here and that you see here are not necessarily our natural disposition Right, it's not something that necessarily comes easily to us or naturally to us. So we need to be intentional about Getting our attitude in the right place for active listening and getting in getting in that mindset of We're going to use empathy. We're not not ask questions and interrupt unless we have something that we need to clarify I'm going to not impose my solution. I'm going to take time to reflect here get the proper attitude for this situation So we're going to give that person our attention We're going to have our attitude in the in the correct spot here and then finally we're going to be willing to adjust We're going to work an adjustment. We're going to keep an open mind We're not going to get narrowing on one solution of this thing We're going to keep an open mind and be willing to change our perspective as we hear that person talk We may enter this with some Feeling or some idea about how we think this is going to go and then the discussion goes in a completely different direction We have to keep an open mind And be willing to adjust and go with it go with the flow in that sense, right? We're not going to interpret things We're not going to again lay our own assumptions on What this person is saying If we have a quote, we're going to take it at face value We're going to we're going to try and build that mental picture And if we have a lack of understanding about something they're saying we can clarify that But we don't just want to interpret. Oh, what they really meant by that is this when they say this word What they really mean is this this is code for something else We're going to take them at face value not interpret inactive listening. We're going to pay attention to nonverbals So it's not just the words that they're saying it's it's how are they saying At what rate are they speaking? What kind of volume are they using? You know, if you know, we're going to pay attention to those types of things We're going to pay attention to their facial expressions and their gestures and their overall posture We're going to pay attention to where they're talking to us about this. Is it a public place? Is it a private setting? You know, that tells us something about the message as well So we're going to adjust all these things and as we see their nonverbals, we're going to go with the flow there as well And we may offer feedback then we can offer feedback But but we're not going to lay our own solution on that we can offer feedback when it's requested And when it's clear that that feedback is welcomed But we need to be able to adjust as well and say is this an appropriate situation For me to for me to provide feedback So those are the principles of active listening attention attitude and adjustment When we can get the three of those things to come together Then we have the makings of active listening When we can provide that person with our attention when our attitude is in the correct space for for active listening And when we can we can be able to make those adjustments And move with the conversation go with the flow in that regard We can engage in active listening which can be a really powerful tool for us Not just in the workplace and not just in a sense of professionalism and professional presence But also in our personal relationships active listening can be a real asset to us So I can consider those things the three a's of active listening next time we need to engage in active listening Remember that I need to give this person my attention I need to adjust my attitude and get in the right headspace for active listening And then I need to be able to and willing to adjust and go with the flow of that conversation depending on what's needed there If you have questions about active listening or anything else related to professional presence I'm always happy to respond to emails. So feel free to shoot me an email I would I would love to hear from you in the meantime get out there and really focus in develop and practice those active listening skills And see how that fits in to your overall sense of professional presence