 What's going on you guys? I have a question today from a student of mine who's in one of my mastermind programs He just started and he said hey Lloyd. I have a question for you You said many times that the most attractive trait a man can have is confidence I am someone who has never felt confident with women and because of that women do not like me How do I gain confidence with women if I don't get any positive reactions? It seems like becoming confident without confidence is impossible Please help Well Not only am I going to answer the impossible. I'm going to do this guy one better I'm going to give him a step-by-step process that he can use even during this quarantine You can do this at home That's going to build you a ton of confidence and be able to make it easier for you to go up and talk to women and show That confidence okay, so before I get into this you guys if you want to become like him or well You know right he's right at the beginning, but if you want to join with my mastermind programs We talk about subjects like these all the time Basically, there's a link in my description click on that link fill out the form and if you seem like a good fit We'll get back to you. Okay, so let's answer this guy's question because yes confidence is built on Demonstrated performance meaning your mind has seen something that you've done and it knows that you can do it again Same thing happens with women if you've walked up talk to attracted dated Very attractive women that it makes sense that you would feel confident to go up and talk to them and do that stuff Again because your mind has seen you do it But if you've never done it and you can't get into confidence and if you can't show that confidence It's gonna be very difficult for you to be attractive to women So how do you break out of this catch 22 scenario? Well, the first thing is that when people ask me questions like this usually they're kind of thinking in a box They're thinking in a very small area, okay, and they're thinking well if I can't be confident You can't do this. All right, you need to think outside of the box. And what do I mean by this? Just because you're not confident with women does not mean that you cannot be confident with yourself Okay, the first thing that I would recommend that you do is be confident being alone be confident being by yourself This is a skill that anyone can develop and it's super easy to do you just practice doing the things that you want to do Every single day. Okay, I'll give you an example One thing that you can do to prove to your mind and your mind isn't dumb It won't make you confident if it doesn't see anything One thing you can do to basically tell your mind that you're a confident person They start with very very small goals. Okay, and I don't even mean them being associated with women Yes, small goals when you go out are good Like let's say you walk up and you talk to a bunch of women But none of them come home with you or none of them give you their phone numbers or whatever But maybe one of them smiled. Okay, that's a small win that you can focus on now Your brain has seen that you focused on it. You know, you can get a girl to smile Maybe next time you can get a girl to talk to you longer and smile Maybe next time you can get a talk to her longer smile and get the phone number. Okay See how confidence builds up slowly with small wins But another thing that you can do right at home right now is do other tasks that are new and Complete them like let's say you woke up and said, okay, I'm gonna learn five words in Spanish You wake up you learn your five words in Spanish Then you've completed the task and you go to bed feeling accomplished You had a goal you went out and you accomplished it and it was something new that might have been a little challenging for you Okay Do this every single day come up with small goals that you can hit Ramp it up slowly make sure that you don't have to make sure that they're new But make sure that there's stuff that you can do and doing new things I think is probably the best way to go Because now what you're telling your brain is that you're telling your brain Hey, I am somebody that when I go off and do new things I can accomplish them I am good at doing new challenging tasks. Guess what another new challenging task is Talking to women talking to women that maybe you find very attractive that you're nervous to talk to you Don't feel confident around. Okay, that's a new challenge Your brain has already seen that you can do other things that are new that are challenging And so it automatically is going to assume now that you can walk up and talk to them Okay, so build up these small wins over time. You can do this at home in quarantine I gave you this learn five languages in Spanish example. There are other things that you can do I don't know what your interests are, but write some of those down start Accomplishing tasks if you start accomplishing tasks every day You're gonna be a machine and by the end of the week, you know or two weeks a month You're gonna be a whole new person. Okay, a lot of times I do this with students in my program I try and get them to build up small wins and if they can't do anything with women or if they're stuck at home Like they are now we work on other things that build up their confidence at home And these are some of the exercises that we do now when I talk about being confident with women again It this is a lot of people don't know if this is gonna translate to skill women because they feel very confident in other aspects of their life But with women these they they find it's a little challenging so to answer those guys's fears I'm gonna tell you a story Basically this happened to me when I was in college now when I was in college if you knew anything about me I was not very successful with women at all. Okay, I didn't have a girlfriend. No girls liked me I had very few friends, but I did a performance in front of a bunch of sororities Okay, a bunch of sororities and fraternities were in the audience It was like 200 200 people or something like that And I did like this hip-hop dance that I came up with in front of them Okay I was super nervous before I walked up there, but I was a decent dancer So I walked up. I did my performance and I frickin crushed it like everybody loved the performance You know, they were all drunk. So, you know, who knows if it was good The point is the audience loved it. Okay, they were having having a good time Anyway, there was an after-party after that performance I went to this after-party and I felt like the frickin man because they had given me so much like positive feedback I was feeling really really confident. I was on like a confidence high So even though previously I had not succeeded at all with women while I was at this party pretty much every single girl that I talked to It felt like it was like clicking. I felt like a spark of attraction with every single one I was just hey, you know, I would basically just walk over grab a girl bring her in talk to her for a little bit Get her phone like I was I was the man. Okay at this party Then I went to bed I woke up and guess what I was not the man anymore. I tried to do the same thing It didn't work. Okay, so what happened there was I built up a lot of confidence and because it was short-lived It was temporary so During that night, I was able to Utilize the confidence that I had built for my performance Into being confident with women and you can do the same thing too But build it up over a longer period of time than just one performance Build it up over the course of weeks and then when you go out You're gonna find yourself being a lot able to tackle new challenging situations again and again because you're used to doing that Okay, and again focus on small wins be comfortable being by yourself And I see no reason why you won't be able to be confident and walk up to women Without actually having been confident with them in the first place. So Thanks for watching you guys if you made it to and consider subscribing I come out with videos like this every single week if you're interested in joining my masterminds or or one of my Programs where you get personally coached by me like I said, there's a link in the description box below click on the link Fill out the form and if you're a good fit, we'll talk Good luck out there you guys