 Hello, welcome back. Yeah, right. We're here. Are we ready? Lali, are we ready to start? Yeah, we're good to go. You're wearing a mask. So it feels like you're in a public place. I'm in my, in our office at the public, actually. Hey, it's watch my work. Y'all know what this is about with me. The title is you. We are back. We have been on hiatus. It was supposed to be September hiatus and my, my, my September is so long this month. No, we pick a September hiatus that turned into an October hiatus. Turned into a November hiatus, but that's all right. We're back. And basically we meet together and we work. We work together by this timer and then we spend the rest of the hour that we have until six o'clock Eastern time to talk with you about your work and your creative process. We have been doing this show for like, I don't know, 13, 12, 11, a while, we've been in the show for a long time. And it's still joyful and fun. And we get a lot of work done. So Lali will explain to you how to get in touch. And yeah, let's explain away. Yeah. So if you'd like to ask a question, if you're here in zoom with us, you can ask questions by clicking the raise your hand button, which should be either in the participants tab at the bottom of your screen or the reactions tab in the bottom of your screen. If you are having any trouble finding it, you can feel free to just private message me in the chat and I can help you out. If you are watching the stream on howl round, feel free to send us your questions via the public theaters, Twitter account or Instagram account or via watch me works, Twitter account, which is at much me work SLP with the hashtag howl round that's hashtag H O W L R O U N D. So that's how you'll ask your questions. Now, you know everything you need to know. We're going to put on the timer for 20 minutes and we're going to do some things. Okay. Yeah. Okay, okay. We are back. We are here. If anybody has this is the question part of the afternoon. Anybody has any questions. Comments, suggestions. We're here. Or we can just sit here. Yeah. Hey, Kimmy. Oh, you, she's raising. She's Kimmy's raising her hand. Oh, you got a good. Hi. It's so good to see you. Congratulations on all your successes. I'm so excited and proud. And I just love you. And I've missed you so much. So I wrote a play a while back. And I think we talked about it briefly where. It's loosely based on my life. And I talked to a friend and I said that. The character has. Her arc is that she had a lot of sexual trauma and abuse. And that. She starts, she has a lot of, in the beginning of the play, she's an alcoholic and drugs. And then at the end, she's not, and he goes. Well, you don't drink, right? And I said, no. And he goes, you don't do drugs. And I said, no, he goes, well, then it's not really. It's not really you. And he says, and it's not as interesting. We've seen that. Before. So he said, so how did you cope? How did, how did you. Survive all that. And I went back and forth trying to figure that out. And. And it was. To feel I was powerful was to not have sex. And then to feel I was powerful was to maybe be promiscuous. And I was wondering how I can maybe incorporate that without it being redundant or. Having too many people coming in and out of the play. Mm hmm. Cool. That's a good question. So you. So in order to make it more. And, uh, and, and. Sorry. And I guess. More what I'm sorry. Less pedestrian because we've seen the arc of drug addicts come to. Yeah. Honestly, Kimmy, it doesn't, it doesn't matter if we've seen it a hundred times. It doesn't matter if that's the story that you want to tell, then you're allowed to tell it. Number one. Okay. But if that's, if you're like, well, that was a cool note that my friend gave me. And actually it moved me to consider. Another take on it. That's cool too. Which sounds like you're, you're into now down the road of another take, which is great. How you can have, um, so how many, so you don't want too many people in the, in the play. How many people do you want in the play? What's your limit? Um, I don't really have a limit. I just thought, um, I don't know. I just thought it might get too muddled with so many characters, just a rotating door. Um, and you know, I consider that too me, like the, the same person because I tend to look, I, I tended in my past to have the same person. So I thought maybe I would have a revolving door in the, it's the same person, but just different outfits or something. Like I have glasses or something work. I mean, so they kind of look the same, but they're kind of different. Oh work. I mean, yeah. That sounds like a good idea. I mean, they're different people. You know, Yeah. You know, one person can play more than one character in a show. I mean, I think also focus on what they want, you know, even if they're playing more than one character, you know, don't just make them a, you know, yeah, yeah. Not a vessel, but I, you know, just someone to hit the ball back to you. If you're using a tennis metaphor, you know, it's like, you know, you know, they have their character. So they deserve to have things that they want, things that they're trying to achieve, even if they're a bunch of different people. You know, flesh them out, give them their due. We could say, you know. Yes. Thank you so much for that. That's wonderful. That's cool. Thank you. That version. That sounds cool. Thank you. I appreciate that. And I really, I really. I love that note that because you don't consider that, but when you do just now in my head, when you said that, I'm like, yeah, they might want something from me. I'm not willing to give, or they might be giving me something I'm not willing to accept. Right. This is why I freaking love you. Susan Lloyd parks is why I love you. Because I consider everybody a person. It's radical. I know. Yeah. So yes, I consider everybody a person. Who it should be considered. As a person. Oh my God. Yes, but that's, yeah, that's, you know. Yes, ma'am. You're so brilliant. Thank you so much. You're welcome so much. Also what's going to help you with Kimmy is it's going to make your main character and it's not you. Okay. It's a character to play or in a, in a novel, whatever you're writing, it's a character. It's going to make your main character better. So when you elevate one character, you elevate all the character. So when you elevate, you know, the sort of minor characters, we might call them, you're elevating all the characters. So it's. Yeah. You just shifted the weight so brilliantly. It deepens the, the protagonist then because. She's got to really, truly explore her own. She's got to really, really explore her own character. Like dislikes and fears based on the trauma that she hasn't been able to shake or deal with yet. And, and that's really a thing that we navigate through when we're going, you know, like, if we haven't had therapy and we're just trying to find our way. We can miss really good healthy relationships. Because we are not. Ready to receive. I think we're good enough to receive love. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Thank you so much. Great question though. Great question. Thank you. Thank you. Lou, you're up next. Feel free to unmute. Thank you. Hi, SLP. How's it going, Lou? It's going so great. I'm not a writing residency right now actually in Massachusetts. That's why that's why I'm here. I'm not a writing residency right now actually in Massachusetts. That's why that background is like. Massive nice. Congratulations. Thank you. I'm that. Smoka. For two weeks. I'm really excited. Nice. Very nice. Thank you. I know. So I'm here doing my work all the time. I brought my timer. I've been channeling you and then I just logged in and was like, oh, snap. She's back. So anyway, I'm super excited to be here. I'm over the moon. So this is my question today. So I've been working on a memoir project. For a while. And experiencing the journey of. The relationship to my material changing from my own perspective as a person and then it changes my ability to deepen my writing. So it's just been a real interesting. Mind trick. And, um, And I'm writing about my career and advertising and, um, at these days and just, um, Sort of how it affected me as a person. Anyway, um, My agent, can you hear me? I'm hearing a little backlog of myself. Okay. There's a little clicky clicky, but I can hear you fine. Okay. Um, so this is my question. My agent, I spoke to her a few weeks ago. She's excited. And she said, I just wish. You put yourself at the center of your story and make yourself. The hero more. And talk about notes and what it drives you to do. So I'm looking at all my work and I'm finding paragraphs and I'm like, more me. More the Senate. And so this is maybe why I bring up like my evolution as a person along with the work because this is what something I've done, which is, you know, try to make myself smaller sometimes. So I think my question is just about. I mean, this isn't the nonfiction space. But the idea of seeing yourself remove from yourself as some kind of person on a hero's journey. Just the trick of that. If you have any thoughts on it. Mm hmm. Yeah, you can, I mean, hmm. Um, I do a lot. I mean, like I just said, you know, they don't call me I mean, you know, I think of myself in the third person. A lot. Um, so, um, as you're working on a memoir, yeah, think of. I mean, do you call it's the character in the memoir. Do you all have the same name? We have the same name. Okay, great. Great. So just refer to, you know, as if she's a character. Mm hmm. You know, just what does she want? What's she doing here? What, what can Lou do right here to be Morris in the center of the scene or the story of this, this chapter? You know, can she drive this chapter? But just start talking about her. She's a character because Lou, she is because it's. Not really you anymore. You know, I mean, it was, it was over a year ago, right? I mean, you're looking back. How long ago was your career in advertising? I left four years ago. Okay. So it's almost a whole new set of cells, right? Yeah. But it generates itself seven years. They say, so you're kind of like over the halfway point. So it's not really you anymore. Right. So. I don't know, you know, how much you want to. I don't know where you are in the memoir. I don't know memoirs. I don't know how to fictionalize for dramatic effect. Or if you're doing anything, I mean, I don't know what you're doing. Or you're just telling it exactly as it happened, as you best remember it. So I'm not sure. But you can bring yourself more into the, yeah, just what's she doing right here? Why is she in the back? Why is she on the sidelines? Treat her like a character because she is. At this point. And that's a great note. And I hope you think so. Do you feel like it's a helpful note? Yeah, I think it's actually, I mean, I've come a long way in my writing. I'm really proud of myself and a lot to owe to you in this space and the work I've been doing. But this feels like a final frontier note. You know, like, I think it's a good note because I think if I can crack it, I just feel really optimistic about what it will mean for the project. Right. Right. It's just a challenging sometimes to, but you're getting what you're saying. Yeah. It's not about you anymore. Right. You're you who we're talking to right now. And in the, in the, in the memoir is a character. Yeah. Telling a story. I mean, I will talk about, I rarely do, but I will talk about something that I've done recently plays for the play gear. First lines in that show where I play the writer. It's not me. I'm playing a writer. So, you know what I'm saying? And I don't know, and I'm sure people with degrees and these, these fields can make more of a meal of it than I can, but it's not me. Okay. Yeah. So think of yourself. Yeah. Think embrace the fact that you are a character. Yeah. And I was to answer something that you sort of said out loud. It's like, I don't see it as reported or journalism. So I mean, of course it's got to be based in truth. It's like, that's essential, but it, there are, I'm taking leaps and putting a few moments together. And I think that's okay. And you, I'm putting a few moments together here. I'm taking a leap here. I mean, I started with the truth and then I bent it. You know what, what people are going to get mad at me because I, I put a few events together and left out some entirely, you know, because they were too weird. I mean, are you right? So you are allowed to tell the story. I mean, I wouldn't get into the day, you know, be mindful of, because memoirs, you know, different. That guy who wrote that person years ago, tiny little things or whatever, remember, and they were like everywhere and there was all a pack of lies. So there's a whole, there are a host of things that you need to be mindful of. And yet if you say, you know, reader, I'm straightening from the truth here, some version of that. Or I think that's allowed. Yes. You know, but really go for it. Yeah. That's a great note. And I'm glad you're taking it. Me too. Thanks for the insight. I'm going to get in with getting, getting it, getting the new draft. What are you, where are you with it? So I need to deliver in mid January, sort of an evolved version. So what is it? You gonna, you gonna make it? Yeah, I'm going to make it or make it. Good. Oh, I'd like to hear that answer. Hey, I know Kimmy's clapping. I'm clapping too. Hooray. Well done. Thank you. I'm on the road. I'm on the road. I'm going somewhere. We'll see where it takes me, but I'm not giving up. I can't stop. I can't stop. That's a thing I can't stop. So. Very good. Yeah. Thank you. Thank you. Thanks, Lou. Thanks, Lou. Thank you. Anyone else have a question? Some of you were in places where it's still light outside, or is that just like artificial lighting where you're faking? Where are y'all? Kelsey and Louise, where are you guys on the, where are you? I'm in Vancouver, BC and Canada. So West. Okay. Okay. Oh, that's just a photograph. It's a photograph. It's a photograph. It's a photograph. Oh, okay. Yeah, it's. I'm going to say it's made up, but it's a photograph of. Another city. Oh, no. It's just my background. But since I'm talking. Yes. Let me just. Let me just say. I'm working on a couple of things, but I. In participating. I've heard other participants talk about. The work, like a memoir of. Their parents, like the mother or the father. I've heard that in this group. And I've been. Starting out doing, I had taken care of my mother. For. Actually, five years. And. Now bear with me. I'm going to try to keep it together. She passed about a year ago. So. I had start writing and I was okay. A friend of mine actually told me about your workshop during the pandemic. And I was like, oh, my God. Everything was fine. I was just, you know, the memories were coming up. Because as I was taking care of her. You know, I would write off in the one. I took pictures, videos, all of that. And then at one point. I was writing and. It was just. All of this emotion. Just kind of. And I was just, you know, almost like. In shock. That. It was just all of these things kind of. Came up. So I just hit the pause button. I mean, I will eventually go back to it, but I was. Just kind of quite amazed. The whole experience of writing. And I was like, I don't know what to say about her. So. So you're pushing, you're pushing pause. I mean, that's, that's a pushing pause is oftentimes an act of self-care, you know, you know what I mean? It's like, if you're, you're just walking along and suddenly you find yourself in water that's up to your. You know, your mouth. And you're like, stop. You know, I don't think I'm going to keep walking because I, I don't think I'm going to keep walking. I don't think I'm going to keep walking. I don't think I'm going to keep walking in danger. And it's not a good kind of danger. It's not like an adrenaline junkie danger, you know. So you're pushing pause. You're taking care of yourself. And I'm guessing, if I may. That you. Deciding to share this with us today. Means that maybe you want to find a way to. Go forward. Resume. So, but it was kind of interesting because. You know, in the community, I live in Harlem and. I guess. Maybe there are at least five people. You know, five different women, I know. Mostly older, but they could be younger women. And we were all like. Taking care of our mothers. So my neighbor that lived around the corner. She was she and her husband were taking care of the mother. Their mother was the same age as my mother. So it was just kind of interesting. I mean, I guess these characters. In my orbit. We're kind of dealing with the same thing. But I guess I am ready to. Jump back in and start, but it was just. Oh, it was just overwhelming. You know, it's just like kind of overwhelming. And. You know, I don't know anything about the light in the background. Ha, ha. Interesting. There's light in the background, Louise. You said, you just said that there's light in the background. You know what I mean? And. I, I don't know. I mean, I feel like you're talking. You know, I feel like you're too overwhelming to, you know, spend five minutes with it today. You know, or tomorrow. I could. Yeah. I mean, because I know I'm years ago. I know Alice Walker had. Said written something or made a comment. How it whatever's going on in your life. And this I really believe if it's something unhealthy or whatever. She said that writing. Could. Make it all right. That you could actually feel through writing, which. I believe you can. You know, I believe you, you can get to a certain space. And I know that I was recently I was. reading a work by James Baldwin and how he grew up in Harlem and his family. And I hadn't read it in years, but it was just like, unbelievable, you know, that he kind of went through all this and was able to put it down, you know, it was just quite remarkable. So, but, you know, I feel I will get through it. And I think the suggestion of like maybe doing five minutes, just five minutes. That's all, you know, just five minutes because I mean, you owe it. It's for you. So pause this act of self care and now maybe restarting in a modest, mindful, loving way is an act of self care as well. You know, five minutes, you know, again, you set your timer, timers are great. I love this. I love my time. Five minutes and then just sit there. I don't know what you write on a computer or a notepad actually, like a like an open, like an open notepad. Yeah. Yeah, even if you just set your timer for five minutes and just sit there with, you know, your pen, what do you write with a pen or pencil or a pen? I usually use a pen. You just sit there. You know, you don't have to like, you know, sit there with your notepad and your pen. Just sit there. It's a very wonderful way to spend five minutes. I mean, what else are you going to do with those five minutes? Like do scroll, watch the news, you know what I'm saying? Like watch a binge watch your favorite TV show, right? Five minutes. You know, so okay. Just see what it feels like, you know, it's gentle, you know, we can be gentle getting restarted on things, you know, or any time it's like you feel like, you know, you want to approach your work and start pushing you're like, you know, you can pause, you know, you can stop and then like, how about five minutes? You know, you know, five minutes is good. Thank you. Yeah, sure. Thank you, Louise. Oh, it looks like MC has a question. How are you doing? Good to see you. I saw you the Sunday before. Thanks for coming out. Thanks. Jim was there too. I was singing to Jim. It was amazing. And there are so many memorable things that that stayed with that. I got from it, but including the the one line where he said, Oh, Americans, they want a happy ending. This is America. That's one. And I love how you conjured up and gave place to the people that meant a lot to you. And so I'm thinking of that. And Louise, I just want to tell you, I'm so sorry you lost your mom. And I know that's so hard when you've been taking care of people. I'm your loved ones and it's really hard watching them go. I took care of both my parents and I was the only one of four siblings who are who was there when they actually passed. And I don't know if that's good or bad because they always say, well, a lot of times they let go when the person they loves the most leaves the room. So it's okay. I bear witness, but I just wanted to give a little to Louise and also to myself. After my father passed, I'd been writing about him before he passed. But now after and it's been four years, I really felt this freedom to write about him and go places where I wouldn't dare when he was alive. You know, and it and it's really liberating sometimes to think about that because he was a very complex person. And then my mom who died quite young, I don't want to make this all about me but I found that, you know, she died real, she died of a stroke and she was younger. And I just feel like in my writing I'm going to give her the life that she deserved. So it really, you know, that's why I'm going to call myself a writer, the writer right now, junior writer and give them the lives that they tell their story because they didn't tell it themselves. That's really beautiful. So that's really, really thank you so much for sharing that. Oh, you're free to say more. That is so very beautiful. Well, you inspired me. Everyone here does, you know, there's so many universal experiences when we lose somebody we love. And then what can we do? You know, I can't paint. I can't sing. You know, I'm not a Taylor Swift can write about every breakup I've had. But you know, I can write something and I wrote a few things and I read them and I don't know unless people are lying to me. They were really moved by it and then it brought up their experiences. So I'm going to do it because I want to. And they deserve it. So Louise, I'm going to take five minutes. I'm going to take 10 to your five tomorrow. Yeah, that's so beautiful. And MCU deserve it too. Like, like in a way we're going to like take what Lou is taking as a note for her written work and we're going to plow it into the field of our lives. Remember, you you are also at the center of your story. You know what I mean? You're at the you're it's about you too. And that's that is a beautiful thing. It's not a it's not a selfish thing. It's not a bad thing. And if we say in a loving way, oh, you're so full of yourself. Yes. Yes. Yes. If we if we are full of ourselves and loving and generous, then wow, look at what we get to give, you know. Yeah, Lou, go for it. Right. Right. Lou. Everyone. And Jim, I'm sorry. I got to ask. Is that a gingerbread man sideways on your wall and back of you? No, I actually was a magazine editor for several years and that came with a screener for a play about voodoo and the film that we were supposed that we in the magazine was supposed to review. It was not a good film but they fell in love with the doll. Okay. The doll flies on my wall. Okay. I thought, oh, it's a cookie. That's no. It's they said earlier we could make a comment. This will be a quick comment. Okay, bro. I know a lot of you are not in New York. So this was the flyer they sent around for top dog underdog. This is the program and it was raining cats and dogs when I came home. So perhaps you can see, even though I had it in a pocket of a plastic raincoat, it got wet. This is the flyer they sent around for plays at the for a place for a plague year. And here's the here is the program. But you outside of New York can buy the book. It is so it was so wonderful to see and feel that in some weird way I'd been a part of it for the months of the gestation but also as you say to see how weirdly sometimes it had changed even from little incidents that you had told us over the year. And if you're going to be in the area I hear it's coming back for a few weeks in the springtime. So go to the public theater website and see if you can see it because it's at Joe's pub. It's a perfect cast. It's a perfect production. And I mean, everyone was so elated and drinking all that. But yeah, so that's the comment. I'll be quiet. You're such a you're such a sweetheart and it was great to see you in the audience and to sing to you. Hope you didn't mind. I was like, get a drum. But what a joy it was. And again, that's just about making, you know, or just making something beautiful out of scraps and bits and things that, you know, sometimes are wonderful and sometimes aren't. And just continuing going forward, you know what I mean? I mean, that's really what this is about. It's like, how can we just get through the day and into tomorrow and keep working? Because I feel like if we continue to work, if we need to do our work, and I don't mean drudgery, I mean our work, our thing. If we continue to show up for ourselves and for our communities and for the world, we win. We're gonna win this. We keep showing up and we keep getting our friends to show up. We keep getting our families to show up. We're gonna win. You know, the glory is ours. We will manifest the beauty of the spirit. So that's all we're doing. That's all we're here for, you know? So, thank you, Jim. Thank you. And thank you, MC, for coming and anybody else who came. I really appreciate it. Super fun. Super fun to do, you know. Thank you all. Rebecca, it looks like you will have our last question of the day. Hey. Hey, Susan Laurie. I had tickets for the week that got canceled. Well, somebody named Susan Laurie Park got COVID. I apologize. I was hoping it wasn't you. So, like, who got COVID? People, you know, it went through the cast. We kept putting in our understudies and then too many people breathed on me. Yes. I know. Anyway, but we'll come back. I know. I'm going to be away the week they opened the advanced tickets for those of us who missed that week. And I made my partner promise. She put it in her calendar. It's like you because I'm not going to have my computer. You have to do this. Are you going to be on a writing retreat? I'm actually on a two-week meditation retreat. Oh, yeah, of course. Of course. Yes. You go on those often. Well, I hadn't been, but again, this is sort of, this is both taking care of myself and taking care of my writing. I've been trying to go more often in the last year since the end of COVID. It was just like, I feel like I really need it. You know, I've been, since we're talking about parents, I've been writing about a promise my father made me make for, it's going to be 14 years now. And that issue of who I am in this has, it comes up all the time as I get to completion. And completion was being able to fulfill the promise, not so much to finish something in a way that makes me look good, but to do what he asked me to do. And the way I solved the problem of the writer in this, the daughter, the niece, I put her in a car and sent her on a trip. So that's how she gets to show up. She likes to drive. And, you know, father liked to drive. Everybody in the family liked to drive. So I had, it was like when I was young, first like actually me, learning to drive, I couldn't learn to drive until I was 20, which in Akron, Ohio is a problem, because I didn't have enough to do. So they, they, I would get bored. So I got an old Volkswagen with a stick shift and that solved that problem. Giving, giving the writer something to do, the daughter is also the solution, I think, for the problem. Whether I'm in the car with with Virgil or not. And he's not my father. He's, I mean, he's my father, but he's Virgil in the, I mean, I just use his name and, and that's, has given me a great sense of freedom to just mostly call him Virgil. So, so I really appreciate how difficult it was in the beginning. I had these great long periods of time where I was just like, I'm done. I'm done and I'm not done. And it's been feeling much more partly, you know, certainly because of watch me work, but also allowing myself to have a self in, in the piece. Because we have many selves obviously. And, and there is one that that lives in, in the manuscript. So, but, you know, I consoled myself with missing, missing out on plays for the plague, play for the plague here with top dog underdog, of course. And that was the happiness. It was a really good time in a really, you know, intense kind of way. So thank you for, thank you for being so present this year with your own work. Yeah, thank you. I love you, Sarah, Becca, allowing myself to have a self in my work. Would we take off the work part? Allowing myself to have a self. Oh, yeah. Everyone thinks meditating is about losing yourself, but you can't actually give up a self if you don't have one. So yeah, and then, yeah, and it's that self that's happy and the good fortune of all of you. And so that's, I mean, that's one of the things I try to work with in, in my writing practice and, and my sitting practice. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you all so much. We are just at time. We will be back same time next week, so please join us. Yeah, love you guys. Thank you, everyone. Thank you so much. Bye bye.