 Colgate Dettle Cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth and help stomp tooth decay and Luster Cream shampoo for soft glamorous caressible hair bring you our Miss Brooke starring Eve Arden It's time once again for another comedy episode of our Miss Brooks written by Al Lewis Well, most school teachers are accustomed to early rising But last Friday morning our Miss Brooks who teaches English at Madison High School Was awakened a little too early by her landlady Mrs. Davis Connie oh Connie. I've got something to tell you. Are you up? I am now, Mrs. Davis Is it seven o'clock? No, dear. It's only five o'clock. I hope you didn't wake me up to tell me I've got two more hours to sleep I thought I heard a noise in the kitchen. Oh, what sort of a noise? Well, first I heard something that sounded like footsteps in the backyard And then there was a sound of a pane of glass breaking then the windows lit up Then there were some more footsteps in the kitchen and then there was a sound of the refrigerator Being opened. Did you go into the kitchen to investigate? No, I figured it was only the cat She wouldn't go to the refrigerator she likes her milk warm. It's probably just your imagination, Mrs. Davis Let's go back to sleep, huh? But Connie as I think back those footsteps were pretty heavy for a cat Please, Mrs. Davis if you're trying to frighten me into thinking there's someone in this house you've succeeded Hand me my robe, please the one on the chair with the extra heavy tassels on the belt Here you are Connie. I'll go put my slippers on and join you in the kitchen. All right It's always nice and dark Why do they always have to put the switch on the opposite end from where you are? I'll just feel my way along the wall and whoops Who's that? All right, don't move now. Who are you and what are you doing in this house? I'm looking for my slippers Sorry, Mrs. Davis, I've got my bearings now. Here's the kitchen door I beg your pardon. I didn't mean to startle you with the flashlight. It's just a tool of the trade If you're looking for the gas meter, it's outside I'm not looking for the gas meter. Anybody else living here besides yourself my landlady, Mrs. Davis But this seems like a strange time to be taking the census I'm not taking the census either miss Brooks Connie Brooks, how do you do? My name is Joe Phillips. Oh happy to shake your flashlight, mr. Phillips If you're looking for money, I can save us both a lot of time. I'm a school teacher Oh, no, no, I wasn't looking after money. I just broke in to raid your icebox Of course, if I don't know when you were a schoolteacher, I'd have brought you a sandwich But I don't understand if you're just after food. Why didn't you go to a restaurant? I? Got a dandy answer for that one. They charge You see I've not a work for several weeks now and since I was a kid I've always been led to believe that starvation is a very unsatisfactory career So when I'm hungry, I just take a chance and drop into various kitchens I never heard of such a thing sit down at that table for a minute I've got to hear some more about this but you caught me red-handed. Aren't you gonna call the police the police? We're lucky if there's enough in that icebox for you and me Of course, we just had leftovers for dinner last night, but you're welcome to some leftover leftovers Well to tell you the truth. I wasn't thinking about dinner what I had in mind was breakfast Oh, I'm sorry. I lost my head. I'll just step out on the back porch and get the milk. I brought it in with me That was very thoughtful Did you look around Connie is everything all right so far so good? Mrs. Davis. This is mr. Phillips. He's a burglar How do you do mr. Phillips? Have you been here long? But very mrs. Davis why because I thought I heard some moving around in here before did you notice anybody? Just a little cat out in the back porch. Oh, that's Minerva, but it couldn't have been Minerva because He's a burglar He's just after our vitamins mrs. Davis He doesn't seem very violent, so I thought I'd give him a bite to eat and get the rest of his story Well for heaven's sake, I'll put on some coffee Thanks, Mrs. Davis. Could I trouble you for the address here, please? The address. Why do you want that? Yeah, it seems to me you found the place all right without the address Well, I like to jot it down on my little black book You see I keep a record of every kitchen I've visited and as soon as I can afford it I'm gonna pay back everyone who's contributed to my nourishment. Yes, ma'am I'm gonna throw the biggest party you ever saw dinner party, huh? How many on your guest list so far about 150 couples With all those people you'll have to break into a pretty big restaurant. Oh, that's one shindig I'm gonna pay for I realize I'll have to find a pretty good job before I can do that But I really intend to make the effort. Well good for you, Joe I must admit that in the past steady work has always seemed quite repellent to me, but Well, it's the only way to get even I guess You're some cereal, mr. Phillips. The coffee will be ready in a minute. Thank you Tell me mr. Phillips in your little food raiding expedition have you ever been caught before tonight? No, ma'am, but I was almost caught last night and the setup looks so lovely. It was about 7 30 in the evening Here was this man fast asleep on a couch It was his big bowl of fried chicken on the table behind him and here was his open window right near it But just as I reach into grab it he woke up You never heard such a bellowing in your life chase me 15 blocks before I finally shook him Well, that's one way to work up an appetite Wasn't worth it things fried in deep fat murder me Well look mr. Phillips if you're serious about wanting to pay back your food debts I may be able to help you our school custodian has been sick for a few days And I might be able to get you a job filling in for him. Please not while I'm eating Use your coffee folks. Oh, why we're on the subject of eating Connie I've been invited over to my sister Angela's for dinner. I'd like to ask you along But Angela hasn't been very well lately and I wouldn't think of bothering Angela. Mrs. Davis. Don't worry about me I'll have a nice dinner in the drugstore. Oh, don't do that. Miss Brooks if you're short of funds Why not have dinner with me? Thanks just the same as to Phillips, but I hate to eat and run Our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden will continue in just a moment, but first here is Vern Smith No other dentifress offers proof of such results proof that Colgate dental cream helped stop tooth decay Before it starts two years research at leading universities using Colgate dental cream Hundreds of case histories makes this the most conclusive proof in all dentifers history on tooth decay Conclusive proof that when teeth are brushed with Colgate's right after eating Colgate dental cream helps stop tooth decay before it starts Yes, the toothpaste you use to clean your breath while you clean your teeth now offers a safe proved way to reduce tooth decay Modern science shows decay is caused by mouth acids, which are at their worst right after eating Brushing teeth with Colgate's as directed helps remove acids before they harm enamel Colgate dental cream has been proved to contain all the necessary Ingredients including an exclusive patented ingredient for effective daily dental care get Colgate dental cream today Big economy size only 59 cents always use Colgate dental cream to clean your breath While you clean your teeth and help stop tooth decay before it starts remember no other dentifress offers proof of such results After breakfast, mr. Phillips helped with the dishes those he didn't swallow and we arrived at school several minutes before my first class You are now in the hallowed halls of Madison High, mr. Phillips on your right is the office of our beloved principal Osgood Conklin known to the faculty as the lion's den Good morning, mr. Brooks and directly in front of you with the lion's cub Harriet. I mean Hello, miss Conklin. How do you do mr. Phillips? Just call me Joe. All right, then you just call me Harriet Okay, Harriet now that we're all engaged I'd like to ask you something Harriet has the custodian returned to work yet No, miss Brooks. He hasn't as a matter of fact daddy has asked me to see that the things that need fixing around here Get fixed at least until I can get somebody to take mr. Jensen's place Oh, then we're just in time you wait right here, mr. Phillips. I'll arrange an interview with mr. Conklin. Okay, miss Brooks It's me mr. Conklin. There's something I'd like to talk to you about very well, miss Brooks But first there's something I'd like to discuss with you. It seems the salary checks have been held up this month and Well, this is a very embarrassing statement for me to make but I'm short of funds If you think that's an embarrassing statement wait till you put your next question. I'm flat broke myself Well, I wasn't thinking in terms of borrowing money miss Brooke Oh, but as I recall my daughter Harriet brought you home to dinner one night last week Now my wife left town yesterday to visit her mother and while I don't feel that you owe me a dinner Well, I am one up on you And after tonight you'll still be one up on me Mrs. Davis is visiting her sister tonight, and I'm going to eat in the drugstore But about this matter of a new custodian mr. Conklin I'd like to tell you maybe the grosser would extend my credit and please sir. I didn't finish talking what oh I'm sorry, miss Brooks. We'll have to forgive my preoccupation with the inner man But I haven't had a square meal in two days Last night Martha left some delicious fried chicken for me on a table and somebody made off with it Well, that's too bad sir, but oh no Did you get a good look at the man? Well, it was pretty dark, and I How did you know it was a man? Well, if he was reaching through the window, I had my how did you know? Reached through the window, but only natural if you were napping on the couch. There was no other How did you know I was napping I didn't don't you always take a nap before your evening meal? Miss Brooks Did you steal my dinner? How can you say such a thing? Oh, well, I'm sorry miss Brooks. I I was quite upset by the incident I'm almost certain. It was a man. I chased that thief of blocks. Well, that's one thing about the man I'd like to recommend for the custodians job. Mr. Conklin. He's as honest as the day is long What you have someone to replace mr. Jensen. Yes. Well, why didn't you say so? Well, don't stand there. Where is he? He's right outside. I'll call him Come on in mr. Phillips. Mr. Conklin will see you now. Thanks This is Joe Phillips mr. Conklin. How do you do say haven't I seen you someplace before? I was about to mention that same thing. Oh, no, I'm sure you two haven't met Although mr. Phillips does get around to some of our better homes Probably just a coincidence now then Phillips. I understand you'd like to fill in here is our temporary custodian Yes, sir. Are you a handyman with tools? You ought to see him with a knife and fork I'm very handy. Mr. Conklin and ours don't mean anything to me either. You said it if I can If I can just take a crack at this job, I know you'll be pleased very well Here are the keys to the custodian's office now help yourself to a pair of overalls and report back to me You've got yourself a job But mr. Conklin, don't you want to ask me any questions about my background or anything? If there's one thing I have It's an ability to judge character Now go my boy and good luck to you. Thank you mr. Conklin and you too, mr. Brooks. So you won't be sorry I'm sure I won't be sorry I can tell by looking at that fellow that he's not only competent, but honest and loyal Now reach over to my desk and hand me the pen on it I've got to send a memo to the board about our new custodian. Yes, sir. Oh There's no pen on the desk, mr. Conklin. Oh, there must be I put it there myself alongside of my watch watch Now don't tell me that's gone, too Are you sure you put your watch on the desk mr. Conklin positive when I came in this morning I took it out of the little pocket in my trousers trousers. Yes Trousers and stop turning your face away. It's common courtesy to look at the person you're addressing Frankly, mr. Conklin. I'm afraid to look In spite of the circumstances under which we had met I was determined to give Joe Phillips a chance by lunch period I felt confident that he was taking advantage of his chance because four desks two sewing machines and a typewriter were reported missing I Didn't completely lose faith in his honesty, but it was ebbing pretty rapidly However, when I dropped into the biology laboratory to meet mr. Boynton for lunch. I temporarily shelved our temporary custodian Hi, mr. Boynton ready to go to lunch. Oh, I'm not going to the cafeteria today, mr. Brooks I brought a box lunch with me since our salary checks were delayed this week. I'm a little short. I've attained full midget hood myself I'm joking, of course. I have enough money for a light lunch if you don't weigh it Look miss Brooks, we've been friends a long time. I brought a very large lunch box down today. I insist you share it with me All right, you get in first I Mean you're very kind mr. Boynton. Oh, it's nothing at all. You're the one who's kind Considerate and the fairest-minded person. He's ever met. That's what mr. Phillips said about you this morning, mr. Phillips I knew custodian. He was in here after first period offered to help me clean out the lab. That's mr. Phillips But couldn't we talk about him later. I'm kind of hungry mr. Boynton. Oh, of course. I'll get my lunchbox out of the desk and That's funny. It's gone your lunchbox my desk Come on mr. Boynton We'll go have these on a glass of milk in the cafeteria, but we're in the world I can't discuss it in detail just yet mr. Boynton, but I'm worried. I need your advice Oh Tell me what should a person do if this person befriended another person only to find out that that person may not have been worthy of the first Person's faith in view of certain occurrences, which although the second person couldn't definitely be accused of them Circumstances seem to point the finger of suspicion at and well just tell me this mr. Boynton What miss Brooks? How did I ever get to be an English teacher? The cafeteria is pretty crowded today mr. Boynton's just getting me some milk this chicken a la king is swell today You ought to try it. It does look good But Walter I'm surprised at your table manners. You're eating with your fingers Everybody's eating with their fingers today. The silverware is all gone Flying set of Easterling knives and forks donated by the wife of Madison High School's founder Mrs. Yodar Critch She'll never miss them. She's been dead ten years But this is awful Walter. I can't help feeling it's my fault your fault. What did you have to do with it? I've got to tell somebody and it might as well be you have you noticed the new custodian bustling around school today Yeah, come to think of it. I have it seems like a very industrious chap. He's industrious. All right. That's why I feel so responsible Do you know where I met this gentleman? Where in my kitchen icebox at five o'clock in the morning, was it awfully chilly? No kidding matter Walter This Joe Phillips broke into our place this morning and when mrs. Davis and I caught him He said he just wanted a meal. He seemed so sincere. I brought him down to school and got him a job Gosh, mr. Brooks, you mean you talked mr. Conklin into hiring a crook at the time I was convinced he wasn't a crook, but in view of the day's event so far I am now convinced that in spite of his very convincing approach. I was prematurely convinced There's no reason for you to be so upset about it Why don't we just call a cop and have him tossed into the pokey because we haven't any evidence Walter besides I'd like to get him out of here without mr. Conklin's knowledge I'll never hear the end of it if he discovers I've recommended the criminal there must be something we can do Oh, you should have called the police last night when you had him dead to rights. Hey Wait a minute. I've got an idea. You've got to getting back to your house again tonight It have you got something you could lure him with I like to think I have Vulnerable spot is his appetite. He'll eat anything as long as it isn't fried in deep fat that murders them Then all we have to do is drop a casual remark that you're having a big turkey dinner at your place tonight And that you're leaving the house right afterwards Where am I going to the show the parent of Arizona just came to town is he taking me? No, that's the name of the movie. Oh now you tell mr. Boynton about our plan and have him at your house tonight at 730 or so a quiet Walter Phillips is coming over here. Now. Remember you know nothing, right? Well, good afternoon, miss Brooks. Hello, mr. Phillips. This is Walter Denton one of my students Well glad to know your son enjoying your food. Oh, he's enjoyed every handful Sit down, won't you? Thanks. I'm kind of tired. I've had a very busy morning. Yes, I know I'm not too familiar with the job as yet. Don't worry about it. I'm sure you'll pick things up as you go along I Confidence expecting big things from me, I guess and I'm gonna do my best not to let them down But after all I only have two hands if you had more there'd be no school by Didn't you have to see one of the other teachers about something what oh, yes, yes, of course Please excuse me mr. Phillips. I've got to see one of the other teachers about something. See you later, Walter. Bye Now then mr. Phillips, you look to me like a man who likes to eat Why do my share of it? Yeah, me too. And if there's one thing I love it's roast turkey Say now you're talking there. It doesn't seem to be any room at the other table. So I'll have to join you, Denton Hello there, Phillip. Hello, mr. Conklin. Is that all you're having for lunch, mr. Conklin a glass of milk and a donut It's all I require Denton. I'm on a diet. Yes, sir. Harriet told me about your salary check being held up Say yeah, that must be why miss Brooks didn't have anything in front of her just now she can't afford to eat Don't be silly. She's purposely not having any lunch because her landlady. Mrs. Davis is roasting them a big turkey for tonight a big turkey a Big turkey a big turkey Well, it's almost eight o'clock if he's coming at all. He should be here any minute or all the lights out in the house Miss Brooks. I just sent Walter to put them out in the kitchen and dining room I also told him to leave the back door unlatched. I'm running out of windows What is it Walter look on this kitchen table here in this roasting pan, it's a cooked turkey a Beautiful cook turkey. Oh now isn't that sweet Mrs. Davis must have left it for me when she went to her sister's put the lid back on Walter This is great now. We've got some real bait now. Remember the plan when we hear him come in We wait at least in the middle of the kitchen then mr. Boynton jumps on him I throw my belt around him and you put the lights on miss Brooks, right now turn them off, Walter there Gosh it's your dark in here the darker the better if we can get him by surprise Somebody's coming right here. I see a flashlight. I Should have told him the door was unlatched Until I finished a drum stick I just wanted to talk to you about something miss Brooks there weren't any lights in front So I thought I'd try the back way through the window But once I got the window open I thought I'd come in and leave a note for you And in what handier place that buried in the stuffing of a turkey Let's go into the living room and talk this thing over. Well, let's all go into the living room We still expect company, you know, yeah, you don't always snag the right weasel the first time That's a switch somebody's at the front door. Hi miss Brooks. It's me mr. Phillips. What do you mean by sneaking in the front way? I'm not sneaking in I just came over to explain a few things this I've got to hear come in So there you are good evening Phillips Oh, I'm glad you're here tonight, mr. Conklin. I missed you at school this afternoon I was going to give this Brooks a message for you. What kind of a message Phillips? Well, your daughter Harriet was very helpful today, sir But when I told her to bring the silverware to the shop to be polished She had it picked up a little too early before lunch. Yes. Yes, I know that isn't the only mistake She made while she was dusting she put my watch and fountain been in my desk And I didn't find them till after school But what about the desks and sewing machines and the typewriter that we're missing? Oh, I just took them down to the cellar to repair them. They sure needed a good varnishing. So does my suspicious mind Mr. Phillips, I owe you an apology and so do I Phillips me too Fortunately, we've got something in the kitchen that'll make us all feel a lot better Suppose we start carving that nice roast turkey. Where do you keep your knives my dear? What was that? It came from the kitchen. Well, come on. Let's investigate Well, I should never have told Walter to unlatch that back door. Why miss Brooks. What's happened? Somebody swiped our turkey Just a moment, but first Tonight yes tonight show him how much lovelier your hair can look after a luster cream shampoo Luster cream world's finest shampoo No other shampoo in the world gives you K. Dumas magic blend of secret ingredients plus gentle lanolin Better than a soap better than a liquid Luster cream is a dainty cream shampoo leaves hair three ways lovelier Fragrantly clean free of loose dandruff listening with sheen soft manageable Even in hardest water luster cream lathers instantly No special rinse needed after a luster cream shampoo So gentle luster cream is wonderful even for children's hair tonight. Yes tonight try luster cream shampoo dream girl dream girl beautiful luster cream You owe your crowning glory And now once again here is Eve Arden the Red Cross provides immediate help for victims of disaster As well as long-term help the rebuilding and repair of homes Extended medical care and where needed even the training for a new job During 1949 almost 300,000 persons in over 300 disaster operations received vital Red Cross aid This cost over six and a half million dollars this year when you contribute to the Red Cross give generously Help the Red Cross continue its good work Next week put into another hour miss Brooks show brought to you by luster cream shampoo for soft blamorous Corrosable hair and Colgate dental cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth and help stop tooth decay Our miss Brooks starring Eve Arden is produced by Larry Burns directed by Al Lewis With the music of Wilbur Hatch under the direction of Maurice Carlton Mr. Boynton is played by Jeff Chandler. Mr. Conklin by Gale Gordon others in tonight's cast were Jane Morgan Dick Cranna Gloria McMillan and Bob Sweeney doctors prove palm olive soap can bring you a lovelier complexion in 14 days Yes, 36 leading skin specialists proved in tests on 1285 different women that palm olive soap facials using nothing but palm olive brought new complexion beauty to two women out of three Just wash your face three times daily with palm olive soap each time for 60 seconds Massaging palm olive's beauty lather onto your skin then rinse So start your palm olive facials today. Remember doctors prove palm olive soap can bring you a lovelier complexion in 14 days For mystery liberally sprinkled with laps listen to mr. And mrs. North the exciting fun-packed adventures of an amateur detective and his beautiful wife tune in Tuesday evening over most of these same stations and be with us again next week at the same time for another comedy episode of our miss Brooks Bob Lamont speaking