 Mario Kart. A game that I'm sure most of us have played, so really there's no need for me to explain the basics of it to you now. What I do feel the need to explain is the difference between people like me and you, versus people in online ranked with over 21,000 points. When you get to point totals this high, the racers all have perfectly spawned in items with the greatest RNG, and the maps also have a chance of spawning in with 200 CC. This is the sweatiest Mario Kart you can possibly play, which is why I decided that me and my friends were going to hop into online ranked matches and try it out to see if we could get any wins at all. If you like these kind of videos, definitely make sure to leave a like and subscribe to the channel, but for now, we have some Mario Kart to play. You're not in, right? Yeah, I'm not in. I'm IBSHPECT8. I get to watch you get cooked, though. Do you think I'm getting cooked by a 28k? 28k race? I think you will get anywhere between 9th and 12th place. Editor, pull up my rank. Pull up everybody else's rank in the lobby around me. Yeah, I'm not losing. First place coming up. Oh, fuck. Well, you're off to a good start. You do have you have two you have two ones in your place right now. Bro got double first place. That's because I'm getting first at least twice in this video. Cap with a couple of tricks. I can't believe Dojo is actually in front of me from the hit anime Jiu-Jitsu Kaisen coming soon. Bro, how did you almost ended up under that? You really think I'm not him? I'm only watching you. I'm about to be super critical of your gameplay. Oh, shit. Oh, shit. Bro, run it into walls. No, that's embarrassing. Because I messed up there. I messed up there. I could tell. That's because I got two laps to clean it up. Oh, look at that. That was clean. Damn, I'm saving it. I'm going to save much. I got to be critical of this gameplay. I save much for my save. You're under water, so I guess you could say it's moist, critical. Shadow turn. Bro, win. Don't go under the eel. I've never been under the eel. This is actually embarrassing. You almost did the first time and then you actually did the second time. Bro, I've actually never been down there. This just isn't me. It's just isn't me. I don't know who I am right now, but it's sort of boom, boom. And it's me again. It's me. I'm back. Say it, bro. Anybody who uses a bullet bill at any point in a race. Oh, oh, into the lightning. This is a 20k right, lobby. And I'm just him. Bro, you're so lucky. I'm just him right now. I'm going to cartoonishly fumble this. I'm actually him. That first play shell about to hit different. I'm actually just him right now. No, how do you fumble? But my bomb actually clutched up. You're still first. You're still first. No shot. No shot. No shot. Damn. Come on, third place is still respectful. Give me a mushroom. I needed that. I needed that. Bro, I was just looking at people behind you with fucking. No, why did you use the horn on me? You fucking dickhead. You fucking dickhead. Hey, you did one place better than I expected. I thought ninth through 12. What in the dick actual unreal? All right. Yeah, man. Bro, I'm trying to go to Singapore. Bro, why are you doing the big long maps? I don't know what this map is. It's new to me. I've never played it. Yes. No. Yes. See, it is a new Mario Kart and we're doing it 150cc. These are the big times. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Dotto, step aside because I'm the second lowest rank in the building now. You're trying to take my underdog shine. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Bro, it's rare that I'm the underdog, but I love it. I love it. I don't know what this map is, bro. So somehow I still feel like I'm the underdog. I'm a week. I think this map is actually beautiful, by the way. Like unironically, they have this map in the dictionary next to beautiful. Then why didn't you pick it? Because I forgot about the DLC stuff. Let's go. I'm racing. I got a mushroom. I'm not sure where the best place to use a mushroom is, but I've got to see the code. Oh, we got a little launcher. The guy from Blue Lockup. That's me thinking of my best Mario Kart course. Look at this. Look at that. Oh, listen to this. OST, which I should have turned off. I don't know how the map works. I just, I just, I cartoonishly drove off the edge. This is my first time on the map. Give me, give me some slack. It's me versus me out here on these streets. 28k ranked. I'm trying to get first. No, not the green shell. Please. I can't get taken out by a random green shell. This can't happen to me. There's a wall there. I made, bro, is new to the map. Bro, I don't know what this map is ever. I'm in third place right now. I'm cooking. Let me cook. Let me be me. Let me be me. Look at this. Look at this. Oh, I'm on the conveyor belts right now. Bro, I knew that fucking fucking. We got a blue shell to mix it up. We got a blue shell to mix it up. I'm a ninth, but this is a fluke, bro. I don't, I don't have map, I don't have map knowledge. If we can get another blue shell. If I get hit by this person with the star, I'm going to throw up in my mouth. Can I ever get a bullet ever in my life? Who needs bullets to win? Who's behind me with the star? Who's behind me with the star? I was fighting for third place down my way. The thing about me and green shells is I don't, who's got the bullet bill? Damn. All right. I've clearly got to pick up the pace. That green shell was threatening my life. I can't even turn. The green shell bleeds. I'm getting cooked. I'm getting cooked. I'm getting cooked. Okay, I'll take it fourth. That's respectable. I'll take it. I'll take a respectable fourth. Bro, I could have a montage of fucking walls I crashed into fucking cliffs I drove off of. Bro, I don't know. I don't have to match up knowledge. I bet you I get more first place in this video than you bro. It ain't going to happen. It ain't going to happen. How do I turn off the music? Oh, you backed out? I backed out. I have Kenzie in there to hold my spot. I don't think you can turn off the music. Step aside and let the true Mario Kart King cook. Go ahead. Count me down mean mean mean mean only dubs. I've always been him. Nothing less. I'm watching bro. You're in eighth place. Are what are you? What are you hoping to accomplish here? Deon? I had to leave to see if I could get the OST back. But now that I'm just watching your perspective, what are you hoping for? I'm hoping to accomplish. What do you mean? Yes. Victory. You want a first place here? Easily. Also shout out to my girlfriend also in the race at a respectable fifth place right now. He was holding on a spot for us. Hey, I got my ass ate by a piranha plant. I wasn't a fan. I'm not going to lie. Bro was looking at me like I was groceries. Which way? This way. Bro, this isn't even a new nude map. You've got to have memory on this one. I don't. I should, but I don't. I like how I got the dramatic angle on you. Damn. I got a fucking. Hey, come here. Come here. I miss. That's going to be a nice draft. That's going to be crucial because now I'm going to get it with a red. So yeah, here comes. Here comes. Okay. It's now you're fine. You're fine. You're fine. Oh, you've got a green shell for protection as well. Respectable third right now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, my God. That was a game changer. Three mushrooms in the back pocket green shells everywhere. He manages to dodge them all. Yeah. A little old for instinct. Don't hurt nobody. Which way? Well, why would you go right, man? Green shell off the rim. Of Luigi. Which way? Oh, bro. Bro, what the fuck is this map? I can't even blame him. I'm not very partial to the red arrows either. That was unfortunate. That was classic. Because it was a different path last time. Yeah, it was. And I personally, I don't like these kind of stages, but that's just me. And he's fallen back to 10th, 11th. Hey, it doesn't show me. It doesn't show me your place. What are you finishing? What are you finishing? Fifth. Okay. Fifth is not so bad. I feel like fifth is like the last thing you could be like. Okay. Yeah. Yeah. It's where it's like right in that zone where you don't feel good, but you don't necessarily feel awful. Yeah. I think fifth is like just fine. But now that I know that, yeah, I'm, please, I'm back in the lobby. What are we thinking? Dan, we don't have no new maps, bro. Mario circle. I know. I know. I'm also good. Yeah. Mario circle. I want to see if this 28K racer can really handle the OG. The fundamentals. Exactly. Like they really voted ice, ice outpost. Is this what it takes to get to 28K ranked points? Bro, is that supposed to be an owl? The one who picked random? What the fuck is that? A bird? Haha. It kind of looks like an angry bird. I'm not going to lie. Yeah. It looks like he has like his hands on his hips. Like, huh. Interesting seeing you here. He does look like he has his hands on his hips, but he also looks like he has like a little penguin feet out in front of him. Yeah. No. Yeah. That's just, yeah, exactly. We're seeing the same, we're seeing the same image. I just wonder if that was the goal. Bro is kind of chilling. He's kicking his feet up. I ain't gonna lie. I'm the only piece of melanin on the fucking screen right now. This is like that one image of like all the white guys at the baseball game. How many ranked points am I about to get for this first place? Also, I'm getting at least two in this video. I'm getting at least one. I'm not going to lie. I think one of us is going to get first place at least once, and then it's not going to happen again. Yeah. Yeah. I for it for me. All right. All right. I just saw your car burn out. Rust art, rust art, rust art. You can't have that in these kind of ranked lobbies. No, no, no, no. No, it was fine. It was fine. I just wanted the good. I got a separate from the pack. I've got a separate from the pack. The anti gravity is going crazy. This is actually ranked Mario Kart right now. We are scrapping. The fights are crazy up here. Two mushrooms. I've got to separate myself. I'll separate myself. I'm taking the inside track. That was a nuts trick. I actually don't recommend that to beginners. All right. I just got attacked. I just got attacked. Honestly, I think it was racial. Not going to lie. Oh, no, I'm getting. Oh, are you ever like in first for a little while? So you forget what the pack really feels like when you're in it and then they catch back up to you and just start beating your ass. Bro, no shot. You just passed me. What? Yeah, bro. You passed me, bro. Stop. Yeah, innocently, innocently. I wasn't at no malicious intent. I didn't sense any malicious intent, but it's still kind of hurt. Yeah, yeah, yeah, no malicious intent at all. Wait, fire guy got to stay behind him. I didn't grab the double box. Insanely bad RNG. Let me see if I can't steal a mushroom off this guy. Give me that. You got to give me that. Too far for you now, bro. I'm right behind you. I can see the whole thing transpire. I can't catch up. I have no item boxes right now and I need. I'm going to need a miracle actually win this. All right. I couldn't get the double because this Yoshi player is actually just huge distrust. Luigi, bitch won't get out of my way. My Mario Kart rage is coming out. I got a double box off the items. This is crazy. There is a bomb in front of me, but she misses. I'm going for a huge skip here to get first in the last seconds of the coming hour. It's going to be me. It is a huge skip to save the day in 28K RANK lobby and he clutches up and he does it again. 32 points. 32 points. All right, now I got to get first twice. Bro, but that bro, come on man. You was with me in the trenches the whole time. How did you do that? I was until I saw my opening and I took it. You know what? I know my mistake. I'm playing as Donkey Kong. I got to be me for real. Nah, what I got to do is I got to do a little Merry Holiday Christmas special right now, bro. I'm picking the Christmas map. For some reason, the DLC maps are few and far between. But Royal Raceway was an S tier map on the Sierra Ex tier list for Mario Kart, bro. Are you sure? I added a bring up, bring up the onslaughts and opinions on the Royal Raceway. Royal Raceway. Like Royal Raceway may be unpopular, but I'm putting this S tier. That's a perfect map. I love Royal Raceway. One of my favorite maps. It's just a perfect map through and through. And I'm not going to lie. You ever heard the heaviest the head that wears the crown, bro? That's how I'm feeling looking back right now. I see a bunch of hungry competitors behind me. Yeah, yeah, yeah. I have a feeling you're going to get humbled this time. I just got to do a bad start last time, man. That's all it was. Look at all the people in front of me that don't know I'm throwing right now for items. They don't know that I got one mushroom. Never mind. I'm a humbling experience, but whatever. Okay, I'm going. I'm going in front. Oh, what's up? Oh, I see you. I see you switched back to you. Yeah, I'm being me for real, bro. You thought I was lying. Okay, okay. I thought you were just speaking metaphorically. I saw that. Don't throw that backwards. Don't throw that back. And there it was. I had already moved. I had already moved. Bro, relax. I'm going on the outside for the double box. I don't regret it. Hey, hey. Three green shells. Holy moly. That was bad. Red shells? I think that was Barry, too. Can you talk to her for me? Like, what the fuck? Bro, bro. Oh, battery on a controller. That's fine. I can readjust. Ever since I got hit by that one red shell by your woman, I've been getting cooked. Oh, my yucks and my labs were not. Damn, I hate you and my girlfriend. That I'm going to be left with nothing. Nobody. I'm going to go for the outside double box. I see you took the single. This is not lap three, though. No, no bigger bullet bill. I've got a bullet bill. I'm flying out without the odd. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to hurt you and the blue shell just. I'm just a hater. That blue shell was for no reason. I'm in eighth place. Blue shell is not going to help me, but it's going to help somebody. Oh, no. He tripped you up the odd. No. Who robbed my mushroom? Damn. It gets intense in a 28 K and right lobby, huh? Right. No, man. He's got me scrapping over every second, separating first and like ninth place. I know. It's it's it's always competitive. Oh my God. Go for the steel. Go for the steel. Coming up fifth. Coming up fifth. No, it was actually the closest race I've ever seen. It was the closest race. Fuck. Hey, what happened to you two? Bro, bro, I'm about to beat you in a New York minute. Hmm. Is New York minute new? Yeah, let's see New York minute. What do you mean? Is it new? But it's I don't I don't know if it's latest DLC pack. Was it on the tier list? No. So it's so it's new to you. Oh, fuck. It's the red arrow type map. I'm I'm I'm I'm gonna drive the wrong way. I know it. Here we go. We're racing away. Let's go. Damn, you fucking physical bitch. Bro, I had a fucking hurdle just crashed into me. Bro, I got that Frank Sinatra music playing which way? Oh, I'm down bad. I'm down bad. New York minute. This is a hard map. I'm like, oh, I'm getting kind of blown back. Music kind of sounds like, uh, I don't know. It's giving me like toy story, but it does sound like I was like, we're walking into Andy's bedroom back in 1998. Bro, this is definitely something he played while he like pretending that like, what was the guy pig pork chop? Like pork chop was like a horse. That's this kind of that's this kind of tune. All right. Respectable force. Wait, that was the end of the bro. You distract me with toy story. I was like, I was like, I was like together. I was like, after this toy story joke. I'm going to this toy story joke. I'm just going to really take off. But I never got my time. Look at that. I don't I always, I always forget that instead of like the state or like JPEG models they have in the crowds like these guys are actually 3d that cat on the left making me uncomfortable right now. He looks like a stated like a Chuck E cheese animatronic. He does five nights at Freddy's DLC. That's embarrassed. God damn. I keep doing. I'm embarrassing myself as a former first place ever. This is embarrassing. Are you locked into that? Give me a bullet bill. We do get lucky. Got a little Christmas in my cross. You know, that's that's kind of cool. I did not look into that. That was actually all still look at. Please don't run out. Start. Please don't run out. Thank you. Thank you. Thank you. Yeah. Don't boom right me. No, I'm going to boom ring your fucking girl through fucking fire at me. We should have. We should have just had kids each other. This car called for this one might as well. She's been an avid stopper of your been a fucking participant for sure. Making her fucking presence fell. Ouch. Ouch. Who put this fucking glue on my eyes? Who put this fucking glue on my eyes? Get this ink off of me. Oh, damn. I just got raw dug. I just got dp'd by green shells. I mean, in a red shell. Bro, you dragon punch by the way. No, I do not. I mean, good old fashioned. I mean, good old fast. I am fighting for every inch right now. It's it's seventh place. I'm with the pack of bullet bill just flew by. Give me a mushroom. Three mushrooms. I might be able to make work. Come on, baby. Come on, baby. I'll take it. I'll take a mediocre fifth. That's fine. Damn, you got third. What do you get? OK, I clearly need to step it up. We're kind of locking horns. I'm not going to lie. Yeah, we're kind of y'all are kind of fighting for that one. I didn't beat 28 K Matsu. Nothing change. All right. Well, then you better hope it changes because we're going into the last race now. Oh, it's a joke. Fucking walking Phoenix. Oh, brother. Of course we got this map. I know this is a classic. Honestly, you look kind of sweet today, bro. The way I'm about to go. OK, well, I appreciate the compliment, but my car burnt out at the beginning. So I'll catch up with you guys shortly. Oh, brother. I just got passed up by walking Phoenix, bro. He's a fucking great actor. That was my red shell. Sorry. Oh, brother. I got a banana in seventh place. Feed me. Somebody feed me something, man. This can't be happening, man. It's trying to feed you a banana peel, brother. This can't be happening to me. Feed me something to me. Dad, I'm just letting you know that it's personal. Bro, I don't. Oh, my God. I just barely dodged those green shells and I don't need any more personal attacks against me. Oh, no, no, no, no. Lake, why? Why, man? Why throws it backwards? You're in seventh place, dipshit. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm bad. I'm actually turbo bad at the game. I saw you mess up the donut skip. Yeah, the donut skip with a star, bro. I just ran into the donut. That was embarrassing, bro. Don't laugh. I'm stealing somebody's. It's pretty funny, bro. I'm stealing somebody's something. I'm actually in the last place. Yes, lightning. I needed that. Oh, I just hope everybody's going slow as hell right now. We are. Even with lightning, I'm actually behind. The light, this, I'm not even going to lie. These are the most competitive lobbies I've ever seen. Yeah, this is insane. The shit is never over. Can I take my turn on the double block? I got it. Give me something. Two mushrooms. Yes. No. I saw you slip on a banana peel. I was in first place, but everyone fucking next to me got blessed with the fucking RNG privileges to skip through the donut when I just had a fucking banana in a green shell. All right, the final race. A hamburger has just arrived. Oh my God. We even got secret service members walking up. I see London loops not very popular with the crowd. He's not at all, but I believe in Mario stadium. I believe it's going to land on yours. Let's do it. That's us. That's us right there. And now, and now we got to win. And by we, I mean me, not you. I could use a second first place and my car burnt out again. I am just, I'm just bad. The twenty eight player also waited to go though. She didn't burn out, but she didn't use her full potential. Wait, what? What's she doing? Did the twenty eight K player just go in a loop? Wait, what? What? I need to study this. What are you doing? Are you doing it? You're trying to fucking study. I just, maybe she doesn't know where to go. Or maybe she knows the faster path. What was that? My God. She just took a different path. That's for me. I got three mushrooms. So I'm skipping across those. Yeah. No. What is that? Damn. I'm dodging bullets like UI Goku. Holy shit. Oh, me too. Actually, that was sick. And then I almost got pushed in some grass. Don't hit me. I'm a snark. Bro, somebody fucking goes. I should have used my last mushroom. Beat my ass with some fire. Nobody's ever tactically used the fire item ever. I actually agree with that. That should have just spammed that shit. Please. I got three. No, who did this? Oh, it's not. It's not final lap. It's not final lap. And who's on Golden Mario? Bro be playing the game. Oh my God. He just got taken out by a bullet bill. Oh my God. She's got taken out by a green shell. That's the first. Damn. Now I'm on the whoa. How much time do we have left? Oh my fucking God. Alex went out of his way to fuck you, dude. Bullet bill. What? No, this does nothing for me. I got to kick it into gear. Come on. I can't catch up. Everybody else is driving too fast. Damn it. Everybody's driving too fast. I couldn't catch up. And I still, we're in such a high lobby that I still got four points. And Matsu actually came in second. She's definitely not even trying. That person only tries on the last lap. No shot. I think that person just never stopped playing and just constantly plays and then the numbers just add up. Crazy how she never stopped playing, but the video just stopped right now. Like and subscribe button. What?