 Charles, I'm 16 years old. I don't want to die. You're responsible, dude. So am I. That's a lie. It is a lie. And I take full responsibility for it. So there are fake windows here, but they're all like this one. They're just a picture. Interesting. And then there's all these pictures of people. That are just generic people. Stop photos. And books. I open them all. They got nothing in them. That would take extra time. It's supposed to look like there's an office, but it's all just stuff for sale. I'm wandering around for hours and still no exit. Yeah, the door moved right when he got in there. Coming across the same stuff over and over again, just rooms and rooms of coaches and desks and supplies for a house that nobody will ever live. I don't think he's coming back. This is day two of observation of D5579, known as Eric, investigating SCP-3008, the Infinite Ikea. The door shifted away right as he entered, almost like it was spiting him. And although he luckily managed to avoid the Ikea employees on night one, he also completely avoided any supplies or the other tribes that could help him. Oh, he's getting close to the camera. Turn on the mic. Hi, Eric. Hope you're having fun. I am approaching the structure. I don't like anything about this. The door is opening. The entity is there. Well, at least it looks happy to see me. I'm telling you, once you figure out how to contain these convention entities, they basically contain themselves. I'm just getting a free vacation on the company dime. Could you just... Take it off. I can't take it off. Come on, you can do it. Take it off right here. Just one little event off the timeline. Take it off. I can't take it off. It's the end of the freaking world. Just take one. We can change it. Just one little... I can't take it off. Come on. Yep, this one's doing numbers. I'm just going to pretend I didn't see that. The GOC deal with it. You have to contain it. No, I don't. I know something you don't. I know something you will never know. You know the rules. I'm something I say goodbye. Alright, history lives of TikTok. I want you to stitch this with a historic misconception that annoys you the most. The state of Massachusetts doesn't exist. And I'm tired of pretending it does. We're sorry. You have reached a number that has been disconnected or is no longer in service. Oh, weird. And I shall call you squishy and you shall be contained. And you will be the contained squishy. Oh, we're going to do so many tests on you and it's going to be... Oh, whoa. It opened. Wait, are you going to... Guys, it blinked. You got to see this. The details are so realistic. I really think the simulated containment areas are going to do wonders for contained sentient anomalies. Let's pull out the D-Class, power it down. Oh, and don't forget to put on your flesh mask. Oh, we got to anesthesize another one. So this is the break room. That's Brian. Hey there, Brian. And this way to the security checkpoint. This is a warning. Stay inside. Don't look at the sky. Don't let anybody in from outside. I was done with TikToks for the day. I got out of costume. I came out to the shed to do some licensing work for some stickers we're releasing later this week. Entropy. I speak for everyone who read SCP-6670 because I told them to. What the f- I keep getting these questions if I'm stuck in the idea. No, this is my bathroom. Like, clearly, like, nothing much of it. Just... No, D-9-375 has undergone a psychotic break and has completely forgotten that they are undergoing SCP-3008 testing. I doubt they will find another tribe and the staff will take them at nightfall. I can't put my finger on it. But something about this place is giving me a deep, crippling sense that something is amiss. I've got a bad feeling about this. The house is mostly vacant, but it contains a dinette set with a human-sized Lego figurine with a skin-like texture. No, nothing to worry about. Don't worry. Oh, no, it had something to worry about. So he's just gonna fly around in broad daylight in total violation of the accords. Not on my watch. Send an agent to bring a man. Sometimes Coney Hawk acts out and in those cases, we can sue the entity by playing the music of its people. It's Cone people. Remember, we die in the dark so you can live in the light and the monsters you can't see are more horrifying than the ones you can. It is an advanced cybernetic entity sent by Anderson Robotics to Steel Foundation Intelligence. Why did you give it a stuffed animal? In today's anomalous research on TikTok, y'all gotta help me out with this because I'm at the end of my freaking rope. So it starts when I find the no-handed plank and I'm thinking, alright, they're physically fit. They found a way to brace themselves between the floor and the door to hold a plank. It's a yoga thing. I don't understand it, but it makes sense. Then they make a video where they jump higher up the door. They start on the floor and the door, but then they jump higher. Gravity is not a factor here. That is not sensical. And just when I think that maybe it's a special room there is no, they go outside and do it without a door behind them at all. What is going on? Is this some David Blaine stuff? Or do I have to contain this because it's anomalous? Help me out in the comments. SCP Redacted Test 12 Commence D6972 has dropped the candy. Entering active phase, candies are animate. They never expect do they? Oh, I got them down fast this time. Oh! Oh, that's horrible. Another D-Class Candy Crushed. Hospital Security Breach detected. Hey guys, so I'm looking around on the public street. I'm in this facility that has some kind of like communication cameras or something. It's supposedly an abandoned building, but look at this. Come on over here. You guys got eyes on this? In progress. Very nice. Alright, I guess they'll just watch the fireworks. Pull yourself together. I believe in you. You can do this. Yeah! Wait, wait, wait, wait. Let's try again. Approaching the coordinates. Frack, it's cold in here. Hey, you're going to wake the others. We wear seatbelts because even though we might still die in a car crash, the odds are highly reduced. And we contain anomalies because they will kill a lot more people if they're free 365 days a year than if they only are out 5 days a year when they breach. This is basic stuff. Try to keep up. Don't come down yet. Interesting. Nice. Oh my gosh, you're going to look so good with a flower crown. What? She makes great flower crowns. Just wait. Yeah. Maybe I... Don't question it. Just go. The entity is dead ahead. Don't let it hear you. Of course you let it hear you. Run! And run full speed! Don't look back! Don't look back! What? Are you going to trip and fall next? Of course you are. Can you get me a D-Class that has seen at least one horror movie? The Shards. They act as a quiet reminder of what happens when we grow complacent. Sure. Complacency. If that's what you call it when a mobile task force is holding position, waiting for orders from Site Command, not realizing that their feet had begun to crystallize, the infection engulfing their entire body, after which the townspeople knock them over, shattering them into said shards. I swear, this town and its mayor and the entire state of Ohio can go redacted. Thank you for listening. Site 42 Studios and its staff are funded by viewers like you. Please become a patron or visit our merch store at the link in our bio to support our work. Secure. Contain. Protect.