 Item number SCP-222-THJ Object Class Safe Special Containment Procedures SCP-222-THJ is contained at site ████. It is allowed to walk around the site under the observation of at least one staff member with Security Clarence Level 2. SCP-222-THJ is not allowed within a 1 meter distance of any computer. If it is found within this area, it is to be brought to its containment chamber immediately. Any personnel who vexes or assaults it will face a severe rebuke or transferred to another site. If SCP-222-THJ behaves well, it will be allowed some catnip. Description SCP-222-THJ is a two-year-old lean male American short-haired cat. According to testing, SCP-222-THJ is highly intelligent and able to understand human language. It appears to have been trained by its previous owner, though it cannot remember who it was. Despite intense observation, the Foundation found no other unusual traits other than its high intelligence. It is able to make conversation with researchers by typing on a laptop. Most of its responses are bickering, despising, mocking, etc., aiming to anger recipient. It also loves catnip. Discovery SCP-222-THJ was not brought in by Foundation personnel, but was sent to site ████ in a box, along with a letter saying, Dear Foundation, I'd like to place this cat under your care for a while. I hope it will give up its bad behaviors when living with you. The Interview Log of SCP-222-THJ Hello Hello Doc, why is it so hot today? Do something! Cat, who sent you here? I'm not a cat, tell me properly, you stupid human. Who is your owner? I tell you if I knew. SCP-222-THJ uses a smile emoticon in the chat box. Do you have any idea what this place is? I guess that's a place where humans like you live together. For breeding. Hey Doc, do you have any catnip? Huh? What is catnip? Huh? What the hell did you just say? How did you even graduate with a doctor's degree? You don't even know catnip? SCP-222-THJ types the following text in the chat box rapidly. Wanker, what school did you even go to? How the bloody hell did they allow you to graduate? You don't even know catnip? Such a waste! Your friends shall be ashamed for having such a stupid friend like you. You don't have any pets at home, do you? Or do you live alone without any friends at all? Every fairy. I'll teach you what catnip is. Such rubbish. SCP-222-THJ continues to insult Dr. Alpha for three minutes, then stops. Stupid Doc, do you already know catnip? You know, the catnip helps me to relax. What is your ability? I want catnip. Bring it to me now. After we finish with this topic, now once again, in a nutshell, what is your ability? You know, the security system here is very weak. What the hell do you mean by that, cat? SCP-222-THJ presses something on the keyboard. Immediately there is a blackout from the whole site. The secondary electricity system starts up to replace the primary one. The alarm sounds. What in the absolute hell are you doing? I just hacked a minor small system. An easy task. That is quite enough, you stupid cat. Take note that. We'll rule this world. Oh, this system here is quite complicated. Type something on the laptop while licking its mouth. I said that's enough! You don't have any bloody right to order me around, wanker. Enough! Otherwise, I'll have to... What will you do? You don't have any damn right to hurt me. Otherwise, you'll be transferred. Dr. Alpha stands and goes out of the room. He comes back later with a water sprayer. Then he sprays directly at SCP-222-THJ until SCP-222-THJ jumps up from the laptop and runs away from Dr. Alpha with a loud hissing. This is just a warning, you goddamn cat! Next time, it'll be super-sokers! SCP-222-THJ is held by Dr. Sue to keep it away from the laptop and is brought back to his chamber with three bottles of catnip. Addendum-222-XD SCP-222-THJ event log sections Date ████, ██, ██, ██, ████ SCP-222-THJ used researcher ████ computer without his permission in his office while he was sleeping during the day. It also tried to insert a virus into the mainframe computer of sight ████, which caused a system of malfunction and was unable to unlock the security doors for two hours. June 1st, 2000, ████, SCP-222-THJ hacked the security system, opened the cell, and then the containment chamber door for SCP-247, allowing it to walk around the corridors, wherefore the whole site was evacuated. July 16, 2000, ██, SCP-222-THJ used a smartphone of a research assistant who forgot it on a dining table and sent a porn video clip to all researchers' computers in the site, which made these unusable for 20 minutes. August 30, 2000, ██, SCP-222-THJ deleted all research data of Dr. ████ and texted lots of expletives. December 20, 2000, ██, SCP-222-THJ ██ and overdosing on catnip, it organized a dubstep concert in the Foundation where it took the role of the DJ, which almost caused SCP-339 and SCP-███ to rampage due to high volume. Addendum 1 It assists many researchers' work, although many personnel complained about being annoyed by its impetuousness. Researchers who it assisted often rewarded it with some catnip. After receiving the catnip, it does not differ from a regular drug-addicted cat. A lot of personnel wanted it to assist them, however, it was of no assistance at all. Whenever a strange event takes place in site, researchers often believe it is the cat's fault. Note from personnel, Kia! It's very cute, Kia! Dr. Sue.