 Hey everyone, I am so glad to be back with you this week last week was kind of rough But I have it on good authority that this week we will be reviewing something that is not from 1993 We're getting away from 1993. So what are we looking at this time matter 788 here? It's time for another vintage GI Joe toy review before we get started with that I need to give a code name to another patron and this guy's name is Brian Zahn First of all Brian excellent name, but there's only one thing that could be your code name So thank you for joining the team Zahn this week. We are looking at a vehicle and it is not from 1993 It is from 1992. This is one that I opened up and assembled myself and In this case, I don't think too many mint in box collectors are gonna be too broken up about it On this channel. I don't do very many ranty videos Well, not that often I try not to get angry about these things All right, stop that the graphics department is no longer allowed to show anything that contradicts me It's a new rule. I don't often do ranty videos I try to keep an even keel around here for one thing I really do love GI Joe and I don't want to give you guys the impression that I just blow up at any little thing that I don't like With this toy though. There was something that really got my blood boiling. What about this little toy got me so upset Let's find out HCC 788 presents the 1992 Cobra rat This is the 1992 Cobra rat the high-speed attack hovercraft This vehicle was only available in 1992. It was discontinued for 1993 It did not come with an action figure in the 1990s fewer GI Joe vehicles came with drivers And this one is no exception to that trend. I purchased this vehicle at Jocan in Chattanooga, Tennessee this year And I assembled it myself. I did an assembly video for it So this is as mint as it can be although the box is a little beaten up We can still take a look at it a hovercraft is an air cushion vehicle that can travel on land or water As a hovercraft you would expect the rat to be both a land and water vehicle But there are some problems with that that we will get to later If you consider the cobra rat to be a water vehicle It joins the ranks of other cobra water vehicles cobra first entered the water in 1984 when two vehicles were introduced one of which was the water moccasin with driver Copperhead the other one being the chameleon swamp skier with driver Zartan the chameleon swamp skier didn't really float. It was more of a pretend water vehicle The water moccasin might properly be considered a cobra's first real boat Even though the cobra rat is roughly the same size as the water moccasin And you might expect it to fill the same role as the water moccasin It does not hold a candle to the 1984 vehicle for reasons we will discuss as a Hovercraft the cobra rat would have to go up against GI Joe's famous hovercraft from 1984 the killer whale If the cobra rat seems a little inadequate parked next to the GI Joe hovercraft It's because it doesn't really deserve to be in the same conversation as the legendary killer whale A more fair matchup would be to stand it next to the GI Joe water vehicle from that same year from 1992 The barracuda, but the barracuda was a submarine and the cobra rat as a hovercraft Would be a surface water vehicle and a land vehicle So these two guys wouldn't really go head-to-head against each other by the way GI Joe Berg has an Excellent review of the barracuda, which you should check out But is the cobra rat even a water vehicle if it's a hovercraft? It should be but nothing on the box says that it is and I'm not sure it is a hovercraft Despite what it says on the box We have many questions to answer with this thing Let's take a look at that box so we can see how the cobra rat was marketed up here at the top We have the GI Joe logo and under that it says a cobra command weapon and we have the cobra enemy logo there That's pretty standard. We've got the name of the vehicle the rat high speed attack hovercraft Got a sticker here for a contest that was going on at the time then and we have the box art which is Fine, it's adequate. We've got the digital background back there and this is okay It certainly does look like the vehicle we got in the box down here in the corner It says flak rotors really launch. We will test that looking at the sides We've got more of that same artwork pretty much all the way around But here on the top of the box we have our flag points It was worth two flag points in the 80s these flag points were on the back of the box They moved them to the top on the back of the box We have a photo of the vehicle the vehicle as seen here is pretty close to the production vehicle the main difference I see is this cobra logo that's behind the rotor is red and on the production vehicle It's black other than that it looks about the same I have the blueprints for this vehicle since I did open and assemble it myself the blueprints printed on the back of the assembly instruction sheets and These blueprints are supposed to give labels to the features on the vehicle That's supposed to make it seem like a real-world vehicle But I actually have some problems with these blueprints first of all these labels are not very good They don't sound very realistic. They seem very made up and sometimes use almost random words But I have a problem with one in particular this one right here number six it says Shock-resistant wheels with extra grip trench climbing treads. They labeled the wheels Which means in universe this vehicle has wheels It's a hovercraft other GI Joe hovercraft had wheels of course because they're toys to roll a toy along the ground You need wheels, but it's supposed to be pretend You're supposed to be pretending that it's a real hovercraft The wheels are just because it's a toy and you're not supposed to draw attention to the fact that it's fake The blueprints are supposed to make it seem real, but instead they pointed a big arrow and drew attention to the fact that it's not a real hovercraft and now I'm Questioning whether the designers even intended for it to be a hovercraft Let's move on and look at the parts and the features of this vehicle First of all it is mostly red with some black and here in the front molded onto the body It has spikes and that's alright. It's kind of cool I guess if an enemy tried to board the vessel it would run into these spikes So that's not bad. It has a few more spikes on the back So that spike motif does continue around the vehicle So this is okay It gives the vehicle a little bit of a unique character next attached to these short little fins We have what the blueprints call gyrating slicer blades with underbrush defoliation barbs They are these saw blade type things. They are black. They are synchronized with the front wheels So as the vehicle rolls they will spin cutting down any tall grass in the way Sometimes they will spin sometimes they have a little bit of trouble Unfortunately, you can see the mushroom clips from the top of the vehicle and that is pretty ugly Basically, these are weed whackers These will cut down the tall grass in front of the vehicle as it moves forward But this is a hovercraft a hovercraft should be able to float over that tall grass and Foliage without any problem. It really shouldn't need these the box art shows these blades Cutting through some grass and leaves in some shallow water But this is supposed to be a hovercraft a hovercraft should be able to float right over all that stuff These blades are too low to cut through like trees or anything like that So again, is this a hovercraft next? We have a black canopy with a green cobra emblem right on top and this canopy is kind of narrow It doesn't provide a lot of protection for the driver. It can open up. It's hinged on the back Just pull it up to reveal the cockpit and the cockpit is not too bad It has a fair amount of sculpted detail in there It even has a sculpted and seat belt on the seat That's a nice touch and it has a fair amount of instrument panel detail as well But it is all red which means some of that detail can get lost a bit The box art shows the rat being driven by version 2 of Firefly So I'm going to demonstrate putting a figure in the vehicle using that same Firefly figure So to put the figure in you just bend his legs and sit him down in the driver's seat It's pretty easy and he should fit down there well enough to close the canopy without any problem And I don't really think I like this look I think they were trying to match up the greens the green on the figure with the green cobra emblem But aesthetically it doesn't really work very well for me on each side We do have green cobra emblems in a black circle and This does provide a little spot of color, but I'm not sure it's enough There is still a lot of red on this vehicle broken up by a little bit of black I feel like this needed some more color variation We have twin guns on each side of the vehicle. They look like Gatling guns pretty cool looking They do pivot out each of them does So you have a little bit of a range of motion on those But I think they work the best when they are forward-facing and actually like these guns. They look pretty fierce I don't really have any problem with them at all The blueprints call them double-barreled rotating machine guns with high-velocity dispersion Scanners and this is an example of the blueprints kind of using made-up words or terms that I don't think Enhance the realism of the vehicle on each side We have Cobra rat stickers and then we get to the main play feature on this vehicle the so-called Flak rotors there are two on the starboard side on this black Disc with the Cobra logo in the background we have one and this one on the starboard side is just for storage It pegs on this circular fan like rotor disc It has a keyed peg it pegs on there pretty well on the starboard side So you can store one of the discs on there when you are not using it on the port side We have the actual disc launcher and you can see the trigger there and it has a sticker that says vortex trigger So it really only launches off of one side off of the port side according to the blueprints to make this work We are supposed to wind the rotor approximately three full turns in clockwise direction 15 to 18 clicks and then to fire push trigger in an upward motion as indicated. Let's test this out Let's turn this rotor about three full turns in a clockwise direction. It's a pretty tight spring So just keep turning it until you've done about 15 to 18 clicks. I'm not counting But I think that's yeah, that's about it It's not turning anymore and I heard it click into place So I think this is ready to fire. We're supposed to push up on this trigger to fire it It's a little bit difficult to aim to demonstrate I'm going to fire it against my back wall if I fire it toward the camera. It's just gonna fly off and you won't see it Unfortunately, you won't be able to see me push the trigger because it's on the opposite side of the vehicle But this I think is the best way to demonstrate Okay, here we go. Let's push the trigger and fire this thing off Yeah, it pretty much works and because it has these angled fan blades and it spins you can get some decent height out of it And it gives you two shots So if you miss your kid brother's face with the first one you can try it again I do need to point out that the rotor blade that fits on the storage side pegs in much more solidly Than the rotor on the launchers side This pegs on pretty loosely and will fall out fairly easily Of course, it can't peg on too solidly because it is supposed to launch off But if you want to keep both of these blades on here, it's not very easy on this port side launcher Moving toward the back. We have a little bit of engine detail on each side. It's pretty weak Then we have those spikes again Then we have the engines that are mounted on this central fin The blueprints call these jet-powered turbo engines with aerodynamic vortex charger on each of those engines We have a sticker that says rat in Green cartoon letters. This almost looks like something out of the 1960s Batman show That is absolutely it as far as features. It has no removable engine covers It has no peg-on missiles. It has space for only one figure. No one else can ride along It has nothing nothing nothing This is a very simple vehicle with a very red body with a few black details And it desperately needs more color interest the stickers try to do that But it just isn't enough. This is a separate piece up here with the fin and the engines That's not all part of the same body mold that separate piece could have been done in another color To add some depth to the vehicle, but instead they made it the same red color as the body So that fails to add anything aesthetically another vehicle with a very similar color scheme was the 1988 Cobra stellar stiletto again almost entirely red with some gray But the stellar stiletto added some silver plastic pieces just to give it something extra and the Cobra rat Desperately needed something like that. There's one thing we haven't looked at yet on this vehicle I intentionally saved it for the very last we haven't looked at the underside and that's because There is no underside throughout this review I have been questioning whether the Cobra rat is really a hovercraft because a hovercraft toy would expect it to be both a Land and water vehicle. This is why the Cobra rat cannot be a water vehicle Because it has no hull it is half a vehicle This is just astonishing to me when I opened the box to assemble this vehicle I thought there was a part missing. I thought there had to be something missing on this thing Somewhere in that box there had to be something that goes on the bottom, but no this is it This is how they designed it There are two sets of wheels with plastic axles between them front and back on the front wheels There are these paddles on the outside of the wheels and that's what spins those blades That's how those work, but that's it look There's a hole that goes through to the cockpit and the action figures feet to just stick through there this This is terrible to say. This is disappointing is an understatement. This is lazy this is Cheap and this vehicle is from 1992, but it's not from 1993 1993 was the pinnacle of lazy and cheap in the GI Joe toy line. No, this is not from 1993 This is from 1992 and they they did this they sold this to kids Can it float? No Looking at how the Cobra rat was used in GI Joe media It did have a few media Appearances in the cartoon series it appeared in the deke animated series the lower quality animated series from the 1990s it only had a few brief appearances It first appeared in the episode long live rock and roll part one the rats appearances in the cartoon series are nothing special Except for the fact that it is clearly depicted as a water vehicle It is shown traveling across water something the toy Absolutely cannot do it was in the comic book series published by Marvel Comics The rat appeared in issue number 127 I don't know if it appeared in any other issues, and I don't care I'm not going to flip through all my comic book issues looking for the thing in the comic book The rat is shown to be a water vehicle. It is traveling on water like a boat Lies all lies looking at the Cobra rat overall 1992 I'm gonna come straight to this camera choke you out Let's try that again Looking at the Cobra rat overall I'm gonna kick your Let's try that for yet a third time It's not 1992's fault some good things happen in 1992 as well It shouldn't make me feel violent tendencies toward an entire calendar year But having said that This toy sucks. This is half a vehicle. It is so clearly missing something It does not deserve to have the GI Joe brand now look here. I don't like to rant I refuse to accept this as grunt. I don't like to rant often one of the reasons is I really do love GI Joe I don't want to give you guys the impression that I just hate on these toys Even GI Joe toys that I don't personally like I usually don't hate I can usually find something good to say about them and if you like these toys I don't want to disparage your opinion or try to change your mind I also don't want to give the impression that I'm normally an angry person. I'm not I also try to keep these things in perspective These are just toys. They don't cure cancer. They don't feed the hungry They don't house the homeless. They are just plastic. They are just toys Even with that perspective there are still some things that make me mad and when I get the impression that has bro a Multi-billion-dollar corporation intentionally short-changed kids I'm not okay with that when I look at this toy I think of all the kids who saved their allowance and earned money Washing lawns and mowing toilets and they go to the store. They buy this toy They open the box and they pull out pure disappointment. Look, we weren't all rich kids I wasn't a rich kid. Not every kid had hundreds of figures and dozens of vehicles Some kids felt lucky to have a toy and any one of these toys could have been some kids first GI Joe toy and it makes me sad to think of the kid whose first impression of GI Joe was this toy and Possibly their last impression too It makes matters worse when the media used to promote this toy the cartoon of the comic book Advertise the toy as doing something it absolutely could not do. This is not a water vehicle This isn't just a matter of changing something to make the toy seem more real in the fictional universe This is not like having the conquest x-30 with two seats instead of one No, this is fundamentally dishonest about the very nature of the toy Can I find anything good to say about this toy? Can I find anything good to say about it? Nope, I don't know if there are any fans of the cobra rat I don't know if any of you guys had this toy and enjoyed it back in 1992 and if you did that's great. That's fantastic You deserve better though. That's it. That's my review of the cobra rat. Thank you very much for watching it Thank you to all my patrons. They make this channel possible They are very generous and I appreciate them very much But I am so happy to have every single one of you that joins me every week to talk about GI Joe I know a lot of YouTube channels just wish they had the kind of viewers that we have here You're all phenomenal and I'm so lucky to have you. I know this was a rough one We usually have more fun around here. So please subscribe to this YouTube channel So you get more GI Joe toy reviews every week And don't forget to find me on Facebook and Twitter and visit my website HCC seven eight eight calm I know it's been two rough weeks in a row But not every review can be the sky striker or the killer whale We got a look at all of them. That means sometimes we will be looking at some real stinkers But next week we start a new month. It will be October and I'm pretty sure we've got some great stuff lined up It's got to be more fun than this. Let me see what we got coming up in October How long does it have to stay under there till I'm sure it's dead