Henry Pym is one of the original 'Avengers' - a scientist that invented a gas that could shrink himself to 'ant' size, yet retain super strength. Hank also invented a cybernetic helmet to talk and befrend ants to help him in his crime fighting.
We picked Hank Pym to sing about, since he has such a rich history. Scientist, superhero, mental patient, cradle-robber, schizophrenic, drug addict, and father figure to robots who wish to enslave the earth. What's not to love?
We could have gone on all day, but limited the song history to the first few years as an Avenger.
Lemme tell you the story of a tiny man Fightin' crime the best he can Good old Hank Pym was a scientist Doin' research and checkin' stuff off his list
He cooked up a powerful new gas And when the smoke and noise had passed He woke up shrunken on the floor He knew he was now something more
He was the Ant-man, he's the incredible Ant-man He shrinks to microscopic size Can't fight much crime, Lord knows he tries
He's not strong like the Hulk or Superman But he's got lots of tiny friends The ants upon whom he depends
Built a helmet to communicate With his six-legged pals so he won't be late In kickin' butt and fighting crime All powered by his Pym Enzyme
Some Egghead tried to take him down But Henry took out that dumb clown Then he met a girl who stung his heart She crawled under his skin from the start
He is the Giant-man, he's the extraordinary Giant-man He grows to such amazing heights But still looks goofy in his tights
He's not cool like Dr. Strange or Iron Man Sometimes when he cannot hack it He'll turn into a YellowJacket
Ant-man and the Wasp, they're quite a team But Henry lacked a certain self-esteem He tried to grow, to steal the show A Goliath among men, you know
But when he had a larger figure It wasn't just his head that got bigger His ego grew to mammoth size And we all know that's none too wise
He's Giant Man - Overcompensating Giant Man He grows to Megolithic size Crackin' the bad guys with his thighs.
He's not funny like Howard the Duck or Forbush Man His brain is losin' all compunction Right from wrong just will not function
Built a robot who was really bad Just so he could be a Dad His Avenger Pals are all so cross because his moral compass' lost
He's dicked around for 40 years And cause his pals nothing but tears Just hang it up --it's been too long You've even got a lousy theme song
He is the Ant Man - He's The Pathetic Ant Man Hey, pal, you should just get a life What superhero beats his wife?
He's not psychotic like Elektra or Wolverine But he's still got his tiny friends The ants upon whom he depends