 Section 1. The Private Memoirs and Confessions of a Justified Sinner, written by himself by James Hogg. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. The Editor's Narrative It appears from tradition, as well as some parish registers still extant, that the lands of Dahl Castle, or Dahl Chastel, as it is often spelled, were possessed by a family of the name of Kahl Wain, about 150 years ago, and for at least a century previous to that period. That family was supposed to have been a branch of the ancient family of Kahl Kuhn, and that it is certain that from it spring the Kuhns that spread towards the border. I find that, in the year 1687, George Kahl Wain succeeded his uncle of the same name, in the lands of Dahl Castle and Bel-Grenin, and this being all I can gather of the family from history. To tradition, I must appeal for the remainder of the motley adventures of that house. But, of the matter furnished by the latter of these powerful monitors, I have no reason to complain. It has been handed down to the world in unlimited abundance, and I am certain that, and recording the hideous events which follow, I am only relating to the greater part of the inhabitants of at least four counties of Scotland, matters of which they were before perfectly well informed. This George was a rich man, or supposed to be so, and was married, when considerably advanced in life to the sole heiress and reputed daughter of a Bailey-Ord of Glasgow. This proved a conjunction anything but agreeable to the party's contracting. It is well known that the Reformation principles had long before that time taken a powerful hold of the hearts and affections of the people of Scotland. Although the feeling was by no means general or in equal degrees. And it so happened that this married couple felt completely at variance on the subject. Granting it to have been so, one would have thought that the Laird, owing to his retiring situation, would have been the one that inclined to the stern doctrines of the reformers. And that the young and gay dame from the city would have adhered to the free principles cherished by the court party and indulged in rather to extremity, in opposition to their severe and carping contemporaries. The contrary, however, happened to be the case. The Laird was what his country neighbours called a droll, careless chap. With a very limited proportion of the fear of God in his heart and very nearly as little of the fear of man. The Laird had not intentionally wronged or offended either of the parties and perceived not the necessity of deprecating their vengeance. He had hitherto believed that he was living in most cordial terms with the greater part of the inhabitants of the earth and with the powers above in particular. But woe be unto him if he was not soon convinced of the fallacy of such damning security. For his lady was the most severe and gloomy of all bigots to the principles of the Reformation. Hers were not the tenants of the great reformers, but theirs mightily overstrained and deformed. Theirs was an unguit hard to be swallowed, but hers was that unguit embittered and overheated until nature could no longer bear it. She had imbibed her ideas from the doctrines of one flaming predestinary and divine alone, and these were so rigid that they became a stumbling block to many of his brethren and a mighty handle for the enemies of his party to turn the machine of the state against them. The wedding festivities at Dahlcastle Park took of all the gaiety, not of that stern age, but of one previous to it. There was feasting, dancing, piping and singing. The liquors were handed around in great fullness. The ale in large wooden bickers and the brandy, incapacious horns of oxen. The lair gave full scope to his homely glee. He danced, he snapped his fingers to the music, clapped his hands and shouted at the turn of the tune. He saluted every girl in the hall whose appearance was anything tolerable and requested of their sweethearts to take the same freedom with his bride by way of retaliation. But there she sat at the head of the hall in still and blooming beauty, absolutely refusing to tread a single measure with any gentleman there. The only enjoyment in which she appeared to partake was in now and then stealing a word of a sweet conversation with her favorite pastor about divine things. For he had accompanied her home after marrying her to her husband to see her fairly settled in her new dwelling. He addressed her several times by her new name, Mrs. Colwayne, but she turned away her head disgusted and looked with pity and contempt towards the old inadvertent sinner, capering away in the height of his unregenerated mirth. The minister perceived the workings of her pious mind and thenceforward addressed her by the courteous title of Lady Doll Castle, which sounded somewhat better as not coupling her name with one of the wicked. And there is too great reason to believe that. For all the solemn vows she had come under and these were of no ordinary binding, particularly on the lair's part, she at that time despised if not abhorred him in her heart. The good person again blessed her and went away. She took leave of him with tears in her eyes, in treating him often to visit her in that heathen land of the Amorite, the Hittite, and the Gurgashite, to which he assented on many solemn and qualifying conditions, and then the combly bride retired to her chamber to pray. It was customary in those days for the bride's man and maiden and a few select friends to visit the new married couple after they had retired to rest and drink a cup to their health, their happiness, and a numerous posterity. But the lair delighted not in this. He wished to have his jewel to himself, and slipping away quietly from his jovial party, he retired to his chamber to his beloved and bolted the door. He found her engaged with the writings of the Evangelis and terribly demure. The lair'd went up to caress her, but she turned away her head and spoke of the follies of aged men and something of the broad way that leadeth to destruction. The lair'd did not thoroughly comprehend this illusion, but being considerably flustered by drinking and disposed to take all in good part, he only remarked, as he took off his shoes and stockings, that whether the way was broad or narrow, it was time that they were in their bed. Sure, Mr. Colwayne, you won't go to bed tonight at such an important period of your life without first saying prayers for yourself and me. When she said this, the lair'd had his head down almost to the ground, loosing his shoebuckle, but when he heard of prayers on such a night, he raised his face suddenly up, which was all over as flushed as red as a rose and answered, Prayers, Mistress? Lord, help your crazed head! Is this a night for prayers? He had better have held his peace. There was such a torrent of profound divinity poured out upon him that the lair'd became ashamed, both of himself and his new-made spouse, and whisked not what to say, but the brandy helped him out. It strikes me, my dear, that religious devotion would be somewhat out of place tonight, said he, allowing that it is ever so beautiful and ever so beneficial where we to ride on the rigging of it at all times would we not be constantly making a farce of it? It would be like reading the Bible and the jest book verse about and would render the life of man a medley of absurdity and confusion, but against the cant of the bigot or the hypocrite no reasoning can ought avail. If you would argue until the end of life, the infallible creature must alone be right. So it proved with the lair'd. One scripture text followed another, not in the least connected and one sentence of the profound Mr. Ringham sermons after another, proving the duty of family worship till the lair'd lost patience and tossing himself into bed, said carelessly that he would leave that duty upon her shoulders for one night. The meek mind of Lady Dolcastle was somewhat disarranged by the sudden evolution. She felt that she was left rather in an awkward situation. However, to show her unconscionable spouse that she was resolved to hold fast her integrity, she kneeled down and prayed in terms so potent that she deemed she was sure of making an impression on him. She did so, for in a short time the lair'd began to utter a response so fervent that she was utterly astounded and fairly driven from the chain of her orisons. He began, in truth, to sound a nasal bugle of no ordinary caliber. The notes being little inferior to those of a military trumpet. The lair'd tried to proceed, but every returning note from the bed burst on her ear with a louder twang and a longer peel, till the concord of sweet sounds became so truly pathetic that the meek spirit of the dame was quite overcome. And after shedding a flood of tears she arose from her knees and retired to the chimney corner with her Bible in her lap, there to spend the hours in holy meditation to feel such time as the inebriated trumpeter should awaken to a sense of propriety. The lair'd did not wake in any reasonable time, for he being overcome with fatigue and wasail, his sleep became sounder and his morphine measures more intense. These varied a little in their structure, but the general run of the bars sounded something in this way. It was most profoundly ludicrous and could not have missed exciting risability in anyone save a pious, a disappointed and humbled bride. The good dame wept bitterly. She could not for her life go and awaken the monster and request him to make room for her, but she retired somewhere and for the lair'd on a waking next morning found that he was still lying alone. His sleep had been of the deepest and most genuine sort and all the time that it lasted he had never once thought of either wives, children or sweethearts save in the way of dreaming about them. But as his spirit began again by slow degrees to verge toward the boundaries of reason it became lighter and more buoyant from the effects of deep repose and his dreams partook of that buoyancy yay to a degree hardly expressable. He dreamed of the real, the jig, the strats bay and the corret and the elasticity of his frame was such that he was bounding over the heads of maidens and making his feet skimmer against the ceiling enjoying the while the most ecstatic emotions these grew too fervent for the shackles of the drowsy god to restrain the nasal bugle ceased its prolonged sounds in one moment and a sort of hectic laugh took its place keep it going play up you devils cried the lair'd without changing his position on the pillow but this exertion to hold the fiddlers at their work fairly awakened the delighted dreamer and though he could not refrain from continuing his laugh beat length by tracing out a regular chain of facts came to be sensible of his real situation Rabina, where are you? What's become of you my dear? cried the lair'd but there was no voice nor anyone that answered or regarded he flung open the curtains thinking to find her still on her knees as he had seen her but she was not there either sleeping or waking Rabina, Mrs. Colwayne, shouted he as loud as he could call and then added in the same breath God save the king I have lost my wife he sprung up and opened the casement the daylight was beginning to streak the east for it was spring and the nights were short and the mornings very long the lair'd have dressed himself in an instant and strode through every room in the house opening the windows as he went and scrutinizing every bed in every corner he came into the hall where the wedding festival had been held and as he opened the various window boards loving couples flew off like hairs surprised too late in the morning among the early braired who bow, fee be frightened cried the lair'd fee, ring like fools as if he were caught in an ill turn his bride was not among them so he was obliged to retake himself to further search she will be praying in some corner poor woman said he to himself it is an unlucky thing this praying but for my part I fear I have behaved very ill and I must endeavor to make amends the lair'd continued his search and at length found his beloved in the same bed with her Glasgow cousin who had acted as bridesmaid you sly and malevolent imp said the lair'd you have played me such a trick when I was fast asleep I have not known a frolic so clever and at the same time so severe come along you baggage you sir I will let you know that I detest your principles and your person alike she said it shall never be said sir that my person was at the control of a heathenish man of belail a dangler among the daughters of women a promiscuous dancer and a player of unlawful games for go your rudeness sir I say and depart away from my presence and that of my kins woman come along I say my charming rab if you were the pink of all puritans and the saint of all saints you are my wife and must do as I command you sir I will sooner lay down my life than be subjected to your godless will therefore I say desist and be gone with you but the lair'd regarded none of these testy sayings he rolled her in a blanket and bore her triumphantly away to his chamber taking care to keep a fold or two of the blanket always rather near to her mouth in case of any outrageous forthcoming of noise End of section 1 Section 2 The Private Memoirs in Confessions of a Justified Sinner Written by himself by James Hogg This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org The next day at breakfast the bride was long in making her appearance Her maid asked to see her but George did not choose that anybody should see her but himself He paid her several visits and always turned the key as he came out At length breakfast was served and during the time of refreshment the lair'd tried to break several jokes but it was remarked that they wanted their accustomed brilliancy and that his nose was particularly red at the top Matters, without all doubt, had been very bad between the new married couple For in the course of the day the lady deserted her quarters and returned to her father's house in Glasgow After having been a night on the road stagecoaches and steamboats having then no existence in that quarter Though Bailey Ord had acquiesced in his wife's asservation regarding the likeness of their only daughter to her father He never loved or admired her greatly Therefore this behavior nothing astounded him He questioned her strictly as to the grievous offense committed against her and could discover nothing that warranted a procedure so fraught with disagreeable consequences So after matured deliberation the Bailey addressed her as follows Aye aye, Rabbie and say I find the doll castle has actually refused to say prayers with you when you ordered him and has gitted you in a rude and delicate manner outstepping the respect due to my daughter as my daughter But we regard to what is due to his own wife of that he's a better judge nor me However, since he has behaved in that manner to my daughter I shall be revenged on him for ance for I shall return the obligation to aim nearer to him That is, I shall take Pennyworth's of his wife and let him look at that What do you mean, sir? said the astonished damsel I mean to be revenged on that villain doll castle, said he for what he has done to my daughter Come hither, Mrs. Calwayne You shall pay for this So saying, the Bailey began to inflict corporal punishment on the runaway wife His strokes were not indeed very deadly but he made a mighty flourish in the inflection pretending to be in a great rage only at the lair of doll castle Villain that he is, exclaimed he I shall teach him to behave in such a manner to a child of mine Be she as she may Since I cannot get at him himself I shall lown to her that is nearest to him in life Take you that, and that, Mrs. Calwayne for your husband's impertinence The poor afflicted woman wept and prayed but the Bailey would not abate odd of his severity After fuming, impeding her with many stripes Far drawn and lightly laid down He took her up to her chamber, five stories high Locked her in and there he fed her on bread and water All to be revenged on the presumptuous lair of doll castle But ever in and on As the Bailey came down the stair from carrying his daughter's meal He said to himself I shall make the sight of the lair The blithest she ever saw in her life Lady doll castle got plenty of time to read and pray and meditate But she was at a great loss for one to dispute with about religious tenets For she found that, without this advantage About which there was a perfect rage at that time The reading and learning of scripture text And sentences of intricate doctrine availed her not So she was often driven to sit at her casement And look out for the approach of the heathenish lair of doll castle That hero, after a considerable lapse of time At length made his appearance Matters were not hard to adjust For his lady found that there was no refuge for her in her father's house And so, after some sighs and tears She accompanied her husband home For all that had passed Things went on no better She would convert the lair in spite of his teeth The lair would not be converted She would have the lair to say family prayers Both morning and evening The lair would neither pray morning nor evening He would not even sing psalms And kneel beside her while she performed the exercise But he conversed at all times And in all places about the sacred mysteries of religion Although his lady took occasion to contradict flatly Every assertion that he made In order that she might spiritualize him By drawing him into argument The lair kept his temper a long while But at length his patience wore out He cutters short in all her futile attempts At spiritualization And mocked at her wire-drawn degrees of faith Hope and repentance He also dared to doubt Of the great standard doctrine of absolute predestination Which put the crown on the lady's Christian resentment She declared her helpmate to be a limb of antichrist And one with whom no regenerated person could associate She therefore bespoke a separate establishment And before the expiry of the first six months The arrangements of the separation were amicably adjusted The upper or third story of the old mansion house Was awarded to the lady for her residence She had a separate door, a separate stair, a separate garden And walks that in no instance intersected the lair So that one would have thought the separation complete They had each their own parties Selected from their own sort of people And though the lair'd never once chafed himself About the lady's companions It was not long before she began to enter metal About some of his Who is that fat bouncing dame That visits the lair'd so often And always by herself Said she to her maid Martha one day Oh dear mem, how can I can We're banished fray our acquaintances here As we'll is fray the sweet gospel ordinances Find me out who that jolly dame is, Martha You, who hold communion with the household Of this ungodly man Can be at no loss to attain this information I observe that she always casts her eye Up toward our windows, both in coming and going And I suspect that she seldom departs From the house empty-handed That same evening Martha came with the information That this august visitor was a miss Logan An old and intimate acquaintance of the lair'd And a very worthy respectable lady Of good connections Whose parents had lost their patrimony in the civil wars Ha, very well said the lady Very well Martha, but nevertheless Go thou and watch this respectable lady's motions And behavior the next time she comes to visit the lair'd And the next after that You will not, I see, lack opportunities Martha's information turned out of that nature That prayers were said in the uppermost story Of Doll Castle House against the Canaanites woman Every night and every morning And great discontent prevailed there Even to the anathemas in tears Letter after letter was dispatched to Glasgow And at length to the lady's great consolation The revered Mr. Ringham arrived safely And devoutly in her elevated sanctuary Marvelous was the conversation between these gifted people Ringham had held in his doctrines That there were eight different kinds of faith All perfectly distinct in their operations and effects But the lady, in her secluded state Had discovered another five, making twelve in all The adjusting of the existence or fallacy of these five faiths Served for a most enlightened discussion of nearly seventeen hours In the course of which the two got warm in their arguments Always in proportion as they receded from nature Utility and common sense Ringham at length got into unwanted fervor About some disputed point between one of these faiths and trust When the lady, fearing that zeal was getting beyond its wanton barrier Broke in on his vehement asservations with the following abrupt disconfiture But sir, as long as I remember Would as to be done with this case of open and avowed inequity The minister was struck dumb He leaned him back on his chair Stroked his beard, hemmed, considered and hemmed again And then said in an altered and softened tone Why? That is a secondary consideration You mean the case between your husband and Miss Logan? The same, sir I am scandalized at such intimacies going on under my nose The sufferance of it is a great and crying evil Madam may be either operative or passive To them it is an evil, but to us none We have no more to do with the sins of the wicked And unconverted here than with those of an infidel Turk For all earthly bonds and fellowships are absorbed And swallowed up in the holy community of the Reformed Church However, if it is your wish I shall take him to task and reprimand and humble him In such a manner that he shall be ashamed of his doings And renounce such deeds forever Out of mere self-respect Though all unsanctified the heart as well as the deed may be To the wicked all things are wicked But to the just all things are just and right Ah, that is a sweet and comfortable saying, Mr. Ringham How delightful to think that a justified person can do no wrong Who would not envy the liberty wherewith we are made free Go to my husband, that poor unfortunate, blindfolded person And open his eyes to his degenerate and sinful state For well are you fitted to the task Yea, I will go in unto him and confound him I will lay the strongholds of sin and Satan as flat before my face As the dung that is spread out to fatten the land Master, there's a gentleman at the four door wants a private ward of ye Tell him I'm engaged I can't see any gentleman tonight But I shall attend on him tomorrow as soon as he pleases He's coming straight in, sir Stop a wee bit, sir, my master is engaged He cannot see you at present, sir Stand aside, thou Moabite My mission admits of no delay I come to save him from the jaws of destruction And that be the case, sir It makes a wide difference And as the danger may threaten to say I fancy I may as well let ye yang by as fight ye we Simeosee say intent on it The man says he's coming to save ye and cannot stop Sir, here he is The Laird was going to break out into a volley of wrath against waters, his servant But before he got a word pronounced The Reverend Mr. Ringham had stepped inside the room And waters had retired, shutting the door behind him No introduction can be more mall upperpo It was impossible For at that very moment The Laird and Arabella Logan were both sitting on one seat And both looking on one book when the door opened What is it, sir? said the Laird fiercely A message of the greatest importance, sir Said the divine, striding unceremoniously up to the chimney Turning his back to the fire and his face to the culprits I think you should know me, sir, continued he Looking displeasedly at the Laird with his face half turned round I think I should return the Laird You are Mr. Howe's decaying of Glasgow Who did me the worst turn ever I got done to me in my life You gentry are always ready to do a man such a turn Pray, sir, did you ever do a good job for anyone to counterbalance that? For if you have not, you ought to be Hold, sir, I say None of your profanity before me If I do evil to anyone on such occasions It is because he will have it so Therefore, the evil is not of my doing I ask you, sir, before God in this witness I ask you, have you kept solemnly and inviolate The vows which I laid upon you that day? Answer me, has the partner whom you bound me to kept hers inviolate? Answer me that, sir, none can better do so than you Mr. Howe's decay you? So then you confess your backsliding And avow the proliqueficy of your life And this person here is, I suppose, the partner of your inequity She whose beauty hath cost you to err Stand up, both of you, till I rebuke you And show you what you are in the eyes of God and man In the first place, stand you still there Till I tell you what you are in the eyes of God and man You are, sir, a presumptuous self-conceited pedagogue A stirrer up of strife and commotion in church, in state, in families and communities You are one, sir, whose righteousness consists in splitting the doctrines of Calvin Into thousands of undistinguishable films And in setting up a system of justifying grace against all breaches of all laws Moral or divine In short, sir, you are a mildew A cankerworm in the bosom of the Reformed church Generating a disease of which she will never be purged But by the shedding of blood Go thou in peace And do these abominations no more But humble thyself, lest a worse reproof come upon thee End of section 2 Section 3 The Private Memoirs in Confessions of a Justified Sinner Written by himself by James Hogg This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer Please visit LibriVox.org Ringham heard all this without flinching He now and then twisted his mouth in disdain Treasuring up, meantime, his vengeance against the two aggressors For he felt that he had them on the hip And resolved to pour out his vengeance and indignation upon them Am I that the shackles of modern decorum Restrain me from penning that famous rebuke Fragments of which have been attributed to every divine Of old notoriety throughout Scotland But I have it by heart And a glorious morsel it is to put into the hands Of certain incendiaries The metaphors are so strong and so appalling That Miss Logan could only stand them a very short time She was obliged to withdraw in confusion The Laird stood his ground with much adieu Though his face was often crimson over With a hues of shame and anger Several times he was on the point of turning The officious psychofat to the door But good manners and an inherent respect That he entertained for the clergy As the immediate servants of the supreme being Restrained him Ringham, perceiving these symptoms of resentment Took them for marks of shame and contrition And pushed his reproaches farther than ever Divine venture to do in a similar case When he had finished To prevent further discussion He walked slowly and majestically out of the apartment Making his robes to swing behind him In a most magisterial manner He being without doubt elated with his high conquest He went to the upper story And related to his metaphysical associate His wonderful success How he had driven the dame from the house In tears and deep confusion And left the backsliding Laird In such a quandary of shame and repentance That he could neither articulate a word Nor flip up his continents The dame thanked him most cordially Lauding his friendly zeal and powerful elegance And then the two again Set keenly to the splitting of hairs And making distinctions in religion Where none existed They being both children of adoption And secured from falling into snares Or anyway under the power of the wicked one It was their custom on each visit To sit up a night in the same apartment For the sake of sweet spiritual converse But that time in the course of the night They differed so materially on a small point Somewhere between justification and final election That the minister in the heat of his zeal Sprung from his seat, paced the floor And maintained his point with such a door That Martha was alarmed And thinking they were going to fight And that the minister would be a hard match For her mistress, she put on some clothes And twice left her bed And stood listening at the back of the door Ready to burst in should need require it Should anyone think this picture overstrained I can assure him that it is taken from nature And from truth But I will not likewise avert That the theologist was neither crazed Nor inebriated If the listener's words were to be relied on There was no love, no accommodating principle Manifested between the two But a fiery, burning zeal Relating to points of such minor importance That a true Christian would blush to hear them mentioned And the infidel and profane make a handle of them To turn our religion to scorn Great was the dame's exultation At the triumph of her beloved pastor Over her sinful neighbors in the lower parts of the house And she boasted of it to Martha in high sounding terms But it was a short duration For in five weeks after that Arabella Logan came to reside with the Laird as his housekeeper Sitting at his table And carrying the keys as mistress substitute of the mansion The lady's grief and indignation were now raised To a higher pitch than ever And she set every agent to work With whom she had any power To effect a separation between these two suspected ones Remonstrance was of no avail George laughed at them who tried such a course And retained his housekeeper While the lady gave herself up to utter despair For though she would not consort with her husband herself She could not endure that any other should do so But to countervail this grievous offense Our saintly and afflicted dame in due time Was safely delivered of a fine boy Whom the Laird acknowledged as his son and heir And had him christened by his own name And nursed in his own premises He gave the nurse permission to take the boy to his mother's presence If ever she should desire to see him But, strange as it may appear She never once desired to see him from the day that he was born The boy grew up and was a healthful and happy child And in the course of another year The lady presented him with a brother A brother he certainly was in the eye of the law And it is more than probable that he was his brother in reality But the Laird thought otherwise And though he knew and acknowledged that he was obliged To support and provide for him He refused to acknowledge him in other respects He neither would continence the banquet Nor take the baptismal vows on him in the child's name Of course, the poor boy had to live and remain an alien From the visible church for a year and a day At which time, Mr. Ringham, out of pity and kindness Took the lady herself as sponsor for the boy And baptized him by the name of Robert Ringham That being the noted divine's own name George was brought up with his father And educated partly at the Paris school And partly at home by a tutor hired for the purpose He was a generous and kind-hearted youth Always ready to oblige And hardly ever dissatisfied with anybody Robert was brought up with Mr. Ringham The Laird paying a certain allowance for him yearly And there the boy was early in yearred To all the sternness and severity of the pastor's Arbitrary and unyielding creed He was taught to pray twice every day And seven times on Sabbath days But he was only to pray for the elect And like devil of old Doom all that were aliens from God to destruction He had never, in that family Into which he had been as it were adopted Heard ought but evil spoken Of his reputed father and brother Consequently he held them in utter abhorrence And prayed against them every day Often that the old, whorey sinner Might be cut off in the full flush of his inequity And be carried quick into hell And that the young stem of the corrupt trunk Might also be taken from a world that he disgraced But that his sins might be pardoned Because he knew no better Such were the tenants in which it would appear Young Robert was bred He was an acute boy, an excellent learner Had ardent and ungovernable passions And with all, a sternness of demeanor From which other boys shrunk He was the best grammarian, the best reader, writer And accountant in the various classes that he attended And was fond of writing essays on Controverted points of theology For which he got prizes And great praise from his guardian and mother George was much behind him in scholastic Acquirements But greatly his superior in personal prowess Form, feature, and all that constitutes Gentility in the deportment and appearance The Laird had often manifested to Miss Logan An earnest wish that the two young men should Never meet, or at all events That they should be as little conversant as possible And Miss Logan, who was as much attached to George As if he had been her own son Took every precaution while he was a boy That he should never meet his brother But as they advanced towards manhood This became impracticable The lady was removed from her apartments In her husband's house to Glasgow To her great content And all to prevent the young Laird Being tainted with the company of her And her second son For the Laird had felt the effects of the principles they professed And dreaded them more than persecution, fire, and sword During all the dreadful times that had overpassed Though the Laird had been a moderate man He had still leaned to the side of kingly prerogative And had escaped confiscation in fines Without ever taking any act of hand In suppressing the coventers But after experiencing a specimen of their tenets And manner in his wife From a secret favorer of them and their doctrines He grew alarmed at their prevalence of such stern and factious principles Now that there was no check or restraint upon them And from that time he began to set himself against them Joining with the cavalry party of that day And all their proceedings It so happened that under the influence of the earls of Seafield And Tula Bardeen He was returned for a member of parliament in the famous session That sat at Edinburgh when the Duke of Queensbury was commissioner And in which party spirit ran to such an extremity The young Laird went with his father to the court And remained in town all the time that the session lasted And his all-interested people of both factions flocked to the town at that period So the important Mr. Ringham was there among the rest During the greater part of the time Blowing the coal of revolutionary principles with all his might In every society to which he could obtain admission He was a great favorite with some of the west country gentlemen of that faction The reason of his unbending impudence No opposition could for a moment cause him either to blush or retract One item that he had advanced Therefore the Duke of Argyle and his friends made such use of him As sportsmen often do of terriers To start the game and make a great yelping noise To let them know whether the chase is proceeding They often did this out of sport in order to tease their opponent For of all pesterers that ever fastened on man He was the most insufferable Knowing that his coat protected him from manual chastisement He spared no acrimony and delighted in the chagrin and anger of those with whom he contended But he was sometimes likewise of real use to the heads of the Presbyterian faction And therefore was admitted to their tables And of course conceived himself a very great man His ward accompanied him And very shortly after their arrival in Edinburgh Robert for the first time met with the young Laird his brother in a match at Tennis The prowess and agility of the young squire drew forth the loudest plaudits of approval from his associates And his own exertion alone carried the game every time on the one side And that so far is all I along to count three for their one The hero's name soon ran round the circle And when his brother Robert who was an onlooker Learned who it was that was gaining so much applause He came and stood close beside him all the time that the game lasted Always now and then putting in a cutting remark by way of mockery George could not help perceiving him Not only on account of his impertinent remarks But he moreover stood so near him that he several times impeded him in his rapid evolutions And of course got himself shoved aside in no very ceremonious way Instead of making him keep his distance These rude shocks and pushes accompanied sometimes with hasty curses Only made him cling the closer to this king of the game He seemed determined to maintain his right to his place as an onlooker As well as any of those engaged in the game And if they had tried him at an argument he would have carried his point Or perhaps he wished a quarrel with this spark of his jealousy and aversion And draw the attention of the gay crowd to himself by these means For like his guardian he knew no other pleasure but what consisted in opposition George took him for some impertinent student of divinity Rather set upon a joke than anything else He perceived a lad with black clothes and a methodistical face Whose continence in eye he disliked exceedingly Several times in his way and that was all the notice he took of him the first time they too met But the next day and every succeeding one The same devilish looking youth attended him as constantly as his shadow Was always in his way as with intention to impede him And ever in and on his deep and malignant eye met those of his elder brother With a glance so fierce that it sometimes startled him End of section three Section four The private memoirs and confessions of a justified sinner Written by himself by James Hogg This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org The very next time that George was engaged at Tennis He had not struck the ball above twice Till the same intrusive being was again in his way The party played for considerable stakes that day Namely a dinner and wine at the Black Bull Tavern And George as the hero and head of his party was much interested in its honor Consequently the sight of this moody and hellish looking student affected him in no very pleasant manner Praise her be so good is keep without the range of the ball said he Is there any law or an acmit that can compel me to do so said the other Biting his lip with scorn If there is not they are here that shall compel you return to George So friend I read you to be on your guard As he said this a flush of anger glowed in his handsome face And flashed from his sparkling blue eye It was a stranger to both and momently took its departure The black coated youth set up his cap before Brought his heavy brows over his deep dark eyes Put his hands in the pockets of his black plush breeches And stepped a little farther into the semi-circle Immediately on his brother's right hand Then he had ever ventured to do before There he set himself firm on his legs And with a face as demure as death seemed determined to keep his ground He pretended to be following the ball with his eyes But every moment they were glancing aside at George One of the competitors chanced to say rashly in the moment of exultation That's a damned fine blow George On which the intruder took up the word as characteristic of the competitors And repeated it every stroke that was given Making such a ludicrous use of it That several of the onlookers were compelled to laugh immoderately But the players were terribly netled at it As he really contrived by dent of sliding in some canicle terms To render the competitors and their game ridiculous But matters at length came to a crisis that put them beyond sport George, in flying backward to gain the point at which the ball was going to light Came inadvertently so rudely in contact with this obstreperous interloper That he not only overthrew him But also got a grievous fall over his legs And as he arose the other made a spurn at him with his foot Which, if it had hit to its aim Would undoubtedly had finished the course of the young Laird of Dahl Castle And Belgrenin George, being irritated beyond measure as may well be conceived Especially at the deadly stroke aimed at him Struck the assailant with his racket rather slightly But so that his mouth and nose gushed out blood And at the same time he said, turning to his cronies Does any of you know who this infernal puppy is? Do you know, sir? said one of the onlookers, a stranger The gentleman is your own brother, sir Mr. Robert Ringham Colwayne No, not Colwayne, sir, said Robert Putting his hands in his pockets And setting himself still farther forward than before Not a Colwayne, sir Henceforth I disclaim the name No, certainly not, repeated George My mother's son you may be, but not a Colwayne There you are right Then, turning around to his informer he said Mercy be about us, sir Is this the crazy minister's son from Glasgow? This question was put in the irritation of the moment But it was too rude and far too out of place And no one deigned any answer to it He felt the reproof and felt it deeply Seeming anxious for some opportunity to make an acknowledgement Or some reparation In the meantime, young Ringham was an object To all of the uttermost disgust The blood flowing from his mouth and nose He took no pains to stem Neither did he so much as wipe it away So that it spread over all his cheeks And breast even off at his toes In that state did he take up his station In the middle of the competitors And he did not now keep his place But ran about impeding everyone Who attempted to make it the ball They loaded him with execrations But it availed nothing He seemed courting persecution and buffettings Keeping steadfastly to his old joke of damnation And mawring the game so completely that In spite of every effort on the part of the players He forced them to stop their game and give it up He was such a rueful looking object Covered with blood That none of them had the heart to kick him Although it appeared the only thing he wanted And asked for George He said not another word to him Either in anger or reproof When the game was fairly given up And the party were washing their hands And the stone fount Some of them besought Robert Ringham To wash himself But he mocked at them And said he was much better as he was George at length came forward Abashedly towards him and said I have been greatly to blame Robert And I am very sorry for what I have done But in the first instance I aired through ignorance Not knowing you were my brother Which you certainly are And in the second Through a momentary irritation For which I am ashamed I pray you therefore to pardon me And give me your hand As he said this He held out his hand towards his polluted brother But the fro-war pedestrian Took not his from his breeches pocket But lifted his foot He gave his brother's hand a kick I'll give you what will suit Such a hand better than mine Said he with a sneer And then turning lightly about He added Are there to be no more of these Damned fine blows gentlemen? For shame to give up such a profitable And edifying game This is too bad said George But since it is thus I have the less to regret And having made this general remark He took no more note of the uncouth aggressor But the persecution of the latter Terminated not on the playground He ranked up among them Bloody and disgusting as he was And keeping close by his brother's side He marched along with the party All the way to the black bowl Before they got there A great number of boys and idle people Had surrounded them Hooting and incommoting them exceedingly So that they were glad to get into the inn And the unaccountable monster Actually tried to get in Alongst with them To make one of the party at dinner But the innkeeper and his men Getting the hint by force Prevented him from entering Although he attempted it again and again Both by telling lies and offering a bribe Finding he could not prevail He set to exciting the mob At the door to acts of violence In which he had liked to have succeeded The landlord had no other shift at last But to send privately for two officers And have him carried to the guardhouse And the hilarity and joy of the party Of young gentlemen for the evening Was quite spoiled by the inauspicious Termination of their game The Reverend Robert Ringham was now to Send for to release his beloved ward The messenger found him at table With a number of the leaders of the Wig faction, the Marquis of Anandale Being in the chair And the prisoner's note being produced Ringham read it aloud Accompanying it with some Explanatory remarks The circumstances of the case Being thus magnified and distorted It excited the utmost abhorrence Both of the deed and the perpetrators Among the assembled faction They declined against the act As an unnatural attempt on the character And even the life of an unfortunate brother Who had been expelled from his father's house And as party spirit was the order of the day An attempt was made to lay the burden of it To that account In short, the young culprit got some Of the best blood of the land to enter As his securities and was set at liberty But when Ringham perceived the plate That he was in, he took him as he was And presented him to his honorable patrons This raised the indignation against the young Laird and his associates a thousand fold Which actually roused a party to temporary madness They were perhaps a little excited By the wine and spirits they had swallowed Else a casual quarrel between two young men At tennis could not have driven them To such extremes But certain it is that From one at first arising to address the party On the atrocity of the offense Both in a moral and political point of view On a sudden, there were six on their feet At the same time Expatiating on it And in a very short time thereafter Everyone in the room was up talking With the utmost vociferation All on the same subject And all taking the same side in the debate In the midst of this confusion Someone or other issued from the house Which was at the back of the cannon gate Calling out A plot, a plot, treason, treason Down with the bloody incendiaries At the black bull The concourse of people that were assembled In Ennenberg at that time were prodigious And as they were all actuated By political motives They wanted only a ready blown coal To set the mountain on fire The evening being fine And the streets thronged The cry ran from mouth to mouth Through the whole city More than that The mob that had of late been gathered To the door of the black bull had By degrees dispersed But they being young men In idle vagrants They had only spread themselves over The rest of the street to lounge In search of further amusement Consequently a word was sufficient To send them back to their late rendezvous Where they had previously witnessed Something they did not much approve of The master of the tavern was astonished At seeing the mob again assembling And that with such hurry and noise But his inmates being all Of the highest respectability He judged himself sure of protection Or at least of indemnity He had two large parties In his house at the time The largest of which was of the Revolutionist faction The other consisted of our young Tennis players and their associates Who were all of the Jacobite order Or at all events leaned To the Episcopal side The largest party were in a front room And the attack of the mob Fell first on their windows Though rather with fear and caution Jingle went one pane Then allowed her raw And that again was followed by A number of voices Endeavoring to restrain the Ignatian From venting itself And destroying the windows And to turn it on the inmates The wigs calling the landlord Enquired what the assault meant He cunningly answered that He suspected it was some of the Cavalier or high church party Exciting the mob against them The party consisted mostly of Young gentlemen by that time In a key to engage in any row And at all events to suffer Nothing from the other party Against whom their passions Were mightily inflamed The landlord therefore had no Sooner given them the spirit Rousing intelligence than everyone As by instinct swore His own natural oath And grasped his own natural weapon A few of those of the highest rank Were armed with swords Which they boldly drew Those of the subordinate orders Immediately flew to such weapons As the room, kitchen And scullery afforded Such as tongs, pokers, spits Racks and shovels And breathing vengeance On the pre-latic party Children of Antichrist And the heirs of damnation The barterers of the liberties Of their country And betrayers of the most sacred trust Thus elevated and thus armed In the cause of right, justice and liberty Our heroes rushed to the street And attacked the mob with such violence That they broke the mass in a moment And dispersed their thousands Like chaff before the wind The other party of young Jacobites Who sat in a room farther from the front And were those against whom the fury Of the mob was meant to have been directed Knew nothing of this second uproar Till the noise of the sally Made by the wigs assailed their ears Being then informed that the mob Had attacked the house on account Of the treatment they themselves Had given to a young gentleman Of the adverse faction But another jovial party had issued From the house in their defense And was now engaged in an unequal combat The sparks likewise flew To the field to back their defenders With all their prowess Without troubling their heads about who they were A mob is like a spring tide In an eastern storm That retires only to return With more overwhelming fury The crowd was taken by surprise When such a strong and well-armed party Issued from the house with so great fury Laying all prostate that came in their way Those who were next to the door And were, of course, the first Whom the imminent danger assailed Rust backwards among the crowd With their whole force The black bull standing in a small square Halfway between the high street And the cow gate And the entrance to it being by two closes Into these the pressure outwards Was simultaneous And thousands were moved to an involuntary flight They knew not why But the high street of Edinburgh Which they soon reached Is a dangerous place in which To make an open attack upon a mob And it appears that the entrances To the tavern had been somewhere near to the cross On the south side of the street For the crowd fled with great expedition Both to the east and west And the conquerors Separating themselves as chance directed Pursued impetuously Wounding and maiming as they flew But it so chanced that Before either of the wings Had followed the flying squadrons Of their enemies For the space of a hundred yards each way The devil and enemy they had to pursue The multitude had vanished Like so many thousands of phantoms What could our heroes do? Why, they faced about to return Towards their citadel, the black bull But that feat was not so easily Nor so readily accomplished as they defined The unnumbered alleys on each side Of the street had swallowed up The multitude in a few seconds But from these they were busy Reckon ordering and perceiving The deficiency in the number of their assailants The rush from both sides of the street Was as rapid and as wonderful As the disappearance of the crowd Had been a few minutes before Each close vomited out its levees And these better armed with missiles Than when they sought it for a temporary retreat Woe then to our two columns Of victorious wigs The mob actually closed around them As they would have swallowed them up And in the meanwhile, shower after shower Of the most abominable weapons of offense Were reigned in upon them If the gentlemen were irritated before This inflamed them still further But their danger was now so apparent They could not shut their eyes on it Therefore both parties, as if actuated By the same spirit, made a desperate effort To join, and the greater part affected it But some were knocked down And others were separated from their friends And blithe to become silent members Of the mob End of section four Section five The private memoirs and confessions Of a justified sinner Written by himself by James Hogg This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer Please visit LibriVox.org The battle now raged immediately in front Of the closes leading to the black bull The small body of Whig gentlemen was Hardly bested and it is likely would Have been overcoming trampled down every man Had they not been then and there joined By the young Cavaliers Who, fresh to arms, broke the wind Opened the head of the passage Laid about them manfully And thus kept up the spirits Of the exasperated Whigs Who were the men, in fact, That wrought the most array among the populace The town guard was now on the alert And two companies of the Cameroonian regiment With the honorable Captain Douglas Rushed down from the castle to the scene of action But for all the noise and hubbub That these caused in the street The combat had become so close and inveterate That numbers of both sides were taken Prisoners fighting hand to hand And could scarcely be separated When the guardsmen and soldiers had them By their necks Great was the alarm and confusion That night in Edinburgh For everyone concluded that it was a party scuffle And the two parties being so equal in power The most serious consequences were anticipated The agitation was so prevailing That every party in town, great and small Was broken up and the Lord Commissioner Thought proper to go to the council chamber himself Even at that late hour Accompanied by the sheriffs of Edinburgh And Lynlithgau With sundry noblemen besides In order to learn something of the origin Of the effray For a long time the court was completely puzzled Every gentleman brought in Exclaimed against the treatment he had received In most bitter terms Blaming a mob said on him and his friends By the adverse party And matters looked extremely ill Until at length they began to perceive That they were examining gentlemen of both parties And that they had been doing so from the beginning Almost alternately So equally had the prisoners been taken From both parties Finally it turned out that a few gentlemen Two-thirds of whom were strenuous wigs themselves Had joined in mauling the whole wig population Of Edinburgh The investigation disclosed nothing The effect of which was not ludicrous And the Duke of Queensbury Whose aim was at that time To conciliate the two factions Tried all that he could To turn the whole fracas into a joke An unlucky frolic Where no ill was meant on either side And which yet had been productive of a great deal The greater part of the people Went home satisfied But not so the Reverend Robert Ringham He did all that he could to inflame Both judges and populace Against the young Cavaliers Especially against the young lair Of Dahl Castle Whom he represented as an inciniary Said on by an unnatural parent To slander his mother And make away with a hapless and only brother And in truth That declaimer against all human merit Had that sort of powerful, homely And bitter eloquence which seldom missed Affecting his hearers The consequence at that time Was that he made the unfortunate affair Between the two brothers Appeared in extremely bad colors And the populace retired to their homes Impressed with no very favorable opinion Of either the lair of Dahl Castle Or his son George Neither of whom were there present To speak for themselves As for Ringham himself He went home to his lodgings Filled with gall And with spite against the young lair Whom he was made to believe the aggressor And that intentionally But most of all he was filled With indignation against the father Whom he held in abhorrence at all times And blamed solely for this unmanorly attack Made on his favorite ward Namesake and adopted son And for the public imputation of a crime To his own reverence In calling the lad his son And thus charging him with a sin Against which he was well known To have leveled all the arrows Of church censor with Unsparing might But filled as his heart was With some portion of these bad feelings To which all flesh is subject He kept nevertheless The fear of the Lord always before his eyes So far as never to admit Any of the external duties of religion And farther than that man Hath no power to pry He lodged with the family Of a Mr. Miller Whose lady was originally from Glasgow And had been a hearer and, of course A great admirer of Mr. Ringham In that family he made public worship Every evening, and that night In his petitions at a throne of grace He prayed for so many vials of wrath To be poured on the head of some Particular sinner that the hearers Trembled and stopped their ears But that he might not proceed With so violent a measure Amounting to excommunication Without due scripture warrant He began the exercise of the evening By singing the following verses Which it is a pity Should ever have been admitted Into a Christian solitude Being so adverse to all its mild And benevolent principles Set thou the wicked over him And upon his right hand Give thou his greatest enemy Even Satan leave to stand And when by thee he shall be judged Let him remembered be And let his prayers be turned to sin When he shall call on thee Few be his days And in his room his charge another take His children let be fatherless His wife a widow make Let God his father's wickedness Still to remembrance call And never let his mother's sin Be blotted out at all As he in cursing pleasure took So let it to him fall As he delighted not to bless So bless him not at all As cursing he likes clothes put on Into his bowel sow Like water and into his bones Like oil down let it go Young Ringham only knew The full purport of this spiritual song And went to his bed better satisfied Than ever that his father and brother Were castaways, reprobates, aliens From the church and the true faith And cursed in time and eternity The next day George And his companions met as usual All who were not seriously wounded of them But as they strolled about the city The rancorous eye and the finger Of scorn was pointed against them None of them was at first aware of the reason But it threw a damp over their spirits And enjoyments which they could not master They went to take a four noon game At their old play of tennis Not on a match but by way Of improving themselves But they had not well taken their places Till Young Ringham appeared in his old station At his brother's right hand With looks more demure and determined than ever His lips were primed so close That his mouth was hardly discernable And his dark deep eye flashed gleams Of holy indignation on the godless set But particularly on his brother His presence acted as a mildew On all social intercourse or enjoyment The game was marred and ended her Ever it was well begun There were whisperings apart The party separated and in order to shake off The blighting influence of this dog to persecute They entered sundry houses of their acquaintances With an understanding that they were to meet On the links for a game at Cricket They did so and stripping off Part of their clothes they began That violent and spirited game They had not played five minutes Till Ringham was stalking in the midst of them And totally impeding the play A cry arose from all corners of Ah, this will never do Kick him out of the playground Knock down the scoundrel or bind him And let him lie in peace By no means cried George It is evident he wants nothing else Pray do not humor him so much As to touch him with either foot or finger Then, turning to a friend He said in a whisper Speak to him, Gordon He surely will not refuse to let us Have the ground to ourselves If you requested of him Gordon went up to him and requested of him Civility, but ardently To retire to a certain distance Else none of them could or would be answerable However sore he might be hurt He turned disdainfully on his heel Uttered a kind and pulpit hem And then added, I will take my chance of that Hurt me, any of you, at your peril The young gentleman smiled Through spite and disdain Of the dogged animal Gordon followed him up And tried to remonstrate with him But he let him know that It was his pleasure to be there at that time And unless he could demonstrate to him What superior right he and his party Had to that ground In preference to him And to the exclusion of all others He was determined to assert his right And the rights of his fellow citizens By keeping possession of whatsoever part Of that common field he chose You are no gentleman, sir, said Gordon Are you one, sir, said the other? Yes, sir, I will let you know That I am by God Then thanks be to him Whose name you have profaned, I am none If one of the party be a gentleman I do hope in God I am not It was now apparent to them all That he was courting obliquely And manual chastisement from their hands If by any means he could provoke them To the deed And apprehensive that he had some Sinister and deeply designed In hunting after such a singular favor They wisely restrained one another From inflicting the punishment That each of them yearns to bestow Personally, and which he so well deserved But the unpopularity of the younger George Calwain Could no longer be concealed From his associates It was manifested wherever The populace were assembled And his young and intimate friend Adam Gordon was obliged to warn him Of the circumstance that he might not be Surprised at the gentleman of their acquaintance Withdrawing themselves from his society As they could not be seen with him Without being insulted George thanked him, and it was agreed Between them that the former should Keep himself retired during the daytime While he remained in Edinburgh And that at night they should meet together Along with such of their companions As were disengaged George found it every day More and more necessary to adhere To the system of seclusion For it was not alone the hisses of the boys And populace that pursued him A fiend of more malignant aspect Was ever at his elbow in the form of his brother To whatever place of amusement He putook himself, and however well He concealed his intentions of going there From all flesh living There was his brother Ringham also And always within a few yards of him Generally about the same distance And ever an anon darting looks at him That chilled his very soul They were looks that cannot be described But they were felt piercing to the bosom's deepest core They affected even the onlookers In a very particular manner For all whose eyes caught a glimpse Of these hideous glances Followed them to the object towards Which they were darted The gentlemanly and mild demure of that object Generally calmed their startled apprehensions For no one ever yet noted the glances Of the young man's eye in the black coat At the face of his brother Who did not at first manifest Strong symptoms of alarm George became utterly confounded Not only at the import of this persecution But how in the world it came to pass That this unaccountable being knew all his motions And every intention of his heart As it were intuitively On consulting his own previous feelings and resolutions He found that the circumstances of his going To such and such a place Were often the most casual incidents in nature The Caprice of a moment had carried him there Yet he had never sat or stood many minutes Till there was the self-same being Always in the same position with regard to himself As regularly as the shadow is cast from the substance Or the ray of light from the opposing denser medium For instance, he remembered one day of setting out With the intention of going to attend divine worship In the high church and when, within a short space Of its door, he was overtaken by A young Kilpatrick of Klossburn Who was bound to the Grey Friars to see a sweetheart As he said, and if you will go with me Call Wayne, said he, I will let you see her too And then you will be just as forward as I am George assented at once and went And after taking his seat He leaned his head forwards on the pew To repeat over to himself a short ejaculatory prayer As had always been his custom Entering the house of God When he had done, he lifted his eye Naturally towards that point on his right hand Where the fierce apparition of his brother Had been want to meet his view There he was, in the same habit Form, demeanor, and precise point of distance As usual, George again laid down his head And his mind was so astounded That he had nearly fallen into a swoon He tried shortly after to muster up courage To look at the speaker, at the congregation And at Captain Kilpatrick's sweetheart in particular But the fiendish glances of the young man In the black clothes were too appalling To be withstood. His eye caught them Whether he was looking that way or not At length his courage was fairly mastered And he was obliged to look down During the remainder of the service By night or by day it was the same In the gallery of the parliament house In the boxes of the playhouse In the church, in the assembly In the streets, suburbs and the fields And every day and every hour From the first recounter of the two The attendance became more and more constant More inexplicable and altogether More alarming and insufferable Until at last George was fairly driven From society and forced to spend His days in his and his father's lodgings With closed doors. Even there He was constantly harassed with the idea That the next time he lifted his eyes He would to a certainty see that face The most repulsive to all his feelings The attendance of that brother Was now become like the attendance of a demon On some devoted being That had sold himself to destruction His approach is as undiscerned And his looks as fraught with hideous malignity It was seldom that he saw him Either following him in the streets Or entering any house or church after him He only appeared in his place George whisked not how or whence And having sped so ill in his first Friendly approaches he had never spoken To his equivocal attendant a second time It came at length into George's head As he was pondering by himself On the circumstances of this extraordinary attendance That perhaps his brother had relented And though of so sullen and unaccommodating A temper that he would not acknowledge it Or beg a reconciliation It might be for that very purpose That he followed his steps night and day In that extraordinary manner I cannot for my life see For what other purpose it can be Thought he He never offers to attempt my life Nor dares he if he had the inclination Therefore although his manner Is peculiarly repulsive to me I shall not have my mind burdened With the reflection that my own mother's son Yearned for a reconciliation with me And was repulsed by my haughty And insolent behavior The next time he comes to my hand I am resolved that I will accost him As one brother ought to address another Whatever it may cost me And if I am still flouted with disdain Then shall the blame rest with him After this generous resolution It was a good while before his gratuitous attendant Appeared at his side again And George began to think That his visits were discontinued The hope was a relief That could not be calculated But still George had a feeling That it was too supreme to last His enemy had been too pertinacious To abandon his design whatever it was He however began to indulge In a little more liberty And for several days he enjoyed it With impunity End of section five Section six The private memoirs and confessions Of a justified sinner Written by himself by James Hogg This is a LibriVox recording All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain For more information or to volunteer Please visit LibriVox.org George was from infancy Of a stirring act of disposition And could not endure confinement And having been of late Much restrained in his youthful exercises By this singular persecutor He grew uneasy under such restraint And one morning Chancing to awaken very early He arose to make an excursion To the top of Arthur's seat To breathe the breeze of the dawning And see the sun arise out of the eastern ocean The morning was calm and serene And as he walked down the south back Of the canning gate towards the palace The haze was so close around him That he could not see the houses On the opposite side of the way As he passed the Lord Commissioner's house The guards were in attendance Who cautioned him not to go by the palace As all the gates would be shut And guarded for an hour to come On which he went by the back Of St. Anthony's gardens And found his way into that little romantic glade Adjoining to the saint's chapel and well He was still involved in a blue haze Like a dense smoke But yet in the midst of it The respiration was the most refreshing And delicious The grass and the flowers were loaded with dew And on taking off his hat to wipe his forehead He perceived that the black glossy fur Of which his chaperon was wrought Was all covered with the tissue Of the most delicate silver A fairy web composed of little spheres So minute that no eye could discern any of them Yet there they were shining in lovely millions Afraid of defacing so beautiful And so delicate a garnish He replaced his hat with the greatest caution And went on his way light of heart As he approached the swire at the head of the dell That little delightful verge From which in one moment The eastern limits and shores of Lothian Arise on the view As he approached it I say In a little space from the height He beheld to his astonishment A bright halo in the cloud of haze That rose in a semi-circle over his head Like a pale rainbow He was struck motionless At the view of the lovely vision For it so chanced That he had never seen the same appearance before Though common at early morn But he soon perceived the cause of the phenomenon And that it proceeded from the rays of the sun From a pure unclouded morning sky Striking upon this dense vapor Which refracted them But the better all the works of nature are understood The more they will be ever admired That was a scene that would have entranced The man of science with delight But which the uninitiated and sordid man Would have regarded less than the mole Rearing up his hill in silence and in darkness George did admire this halo of glory Which still grew wider and less defined As he approached the surface of the cloud But to his utter amazement and supreme delight He found on reaching the top of Arthur's seat That this sub-lunary rainbow, this terrestrial glory Was spread in its most vivid hues beneath his feet Still he could not perceive the body of the sun Although the light behind him was dazzling But the cloud of haze lying dense in that deep dell That separates the hill from the rocks of solaceberry And the dull shadow of the hill mingling with that cloud Made the dell a pit of darkness On that shadowy cloud was the lovely rainbow formed Spreading itself on a horizontal plane And having a slight and brilliant shade Of the colors of the heavenly bow But all of them paler and less defined But this terrestrial phenomenon of the early morn Cannot be better delineated than by the name Given of it by the shepherd boys The little wee ghost of the rainbow Such was the description of the morning And the wild shades of the hill That George gave to his father and Mr. Adam Gordon That same day on which he had witnessed them And it is necessary that the reader should comprehend Something of their nature to understand what follows He seated himself on the pinnacle of the rocky precipice A little within the top of the hill to the westward And with a light and buoyant heart Viewed the beauties of the morning And inhaled its salubrious breeze Here thought he I can converse with nature without disturbance Without being intruded on by any appalling or obnoxious visitor The idea of his brother's dark and malevolent looks Coming at that moment across his mind He turned his eyes instinctively to the right To the point where that unwelcome guest Was want to make his appearance Gracious heaven! What an apparition was there presented to his view He saw, delineated in the cloud The shoulders, arms, and features of a human being Of the most dreadful aspect The face was the face of his brother But dilated to twenty times the natural size Its dark eyes gleamed on him through the mist While every furrow of its hideous brow Frowned deep as the ravines of the brow of the hill George started and his hair stood up in bristles As he gazed on this horrible monster He saw every feature in every line of the face Distinctly as it gazed on him With an intensity that was hardly brookable Its eyes were fixed on him In the same manner as those of some carnivorous animal Fixed on its prey And yet there was fear and trembling In these unearthly features As plainly depicted as murderous malice The giant apparition seemed sometimes to be cowering down as in terror So that nothing but his brow and eyes were seen Still these never turned one moment from their object Again it rose imperceptively up And began to approach with great caution And as it neared the dimensions of its form lessened Still continuing however far above the natural size George conceived it to be a spirit He could conceive it to be nothing else And he took it for some horrid demon by which he was haunted That had assumed the features of his brother in every lineament But in taking on itself the human form Had miscalculated dreadfully on the size And presented itself thus to him in a blown up, dilated frame of embodied air Exhaled from the caverns of death or the regions of devouring fire He was further confirmed in the belief that it was a malignant spirit On perceiving that it approached him across the front of a precipice Where there was not footing for thing of mortal frame Still, what with terror and astonishment He continued riveted to the spot till it approached As he deemed to within two yards of him Perceiving that it was setting itself to make a violent spring on him He started to his feet and fled distractedly in the opposite direction Keeping his eye cast behind him less he had been seized in that dangerous place But the very first bolt that he made in his flight He came in contact with a real body of flesh and blood And that with such violence that both went down among some scragged rocks And George rolled over the other The being called out, murder! And rising fled precipitately George then perceived that it was his brother And being confounded between the shadow and the substance He knew not what he was doing or what he had done And there, being only one natural way of retreat from the brink of the rock He likewise arose and pursued the affright and culprit With all his speed towards the top of the hill Ringham was braying out, murder! murder! At which George, being disgusted And his spirits all in a ferment from some hurried idea of intended harm The moment he came up with the craven, he seized him rudely by the shoulder And clapped his hand on his mouth Murder! You beast! said he What do you mean by roaring out murder in that way? Who the devil is murdering you or offering to murder you? Ringham forced his mouth from under his brother's hand And roared with redoubled energy Murder! Murder! et cetera George had felt resolute to put down this shocking alarm Lest someone might hear it and fly to the spot Or draw inferences widely different from the truth And perceiving the terror of this elect youth to be so great That expostulation was vain He seized him by the mouth and nose with his left hand Strenuously that he sank his fingers into his cheeks But the paltrune still attempting to bray out George gave him such a stunning blow with his fist on the left temple That he crumbled, as it were to the ground But more from the effects of terror than those of the blow His nose however again gushed out blood A system of defense which seemed as natural to him As that resorted to by the race of stinkards He then raised himself on his knees and hands And raising up his ghastly face while the blood streamed over both ears He besought his life of his brother in the most abject whining manner Gaping and blubbering most piteously Tell me then sir, said George Resolved to make the most of the wretched terror Tell me for what purpose it is that you haunt my steps Tell me plainly and instantly Else I will throw you from the verge of that precipice Oh, I will never do it again I will never do it again Spare my life, dear good brother Spare my life, sure I never did you any hurt Swear to me then, by the God that made you That you will never henceforth follow after me To torment me with your hellish threatening looks Swear that you will never again come into my presence Without being invited Will you take an oath to this effect? Oh yes, I will, I will But this is not all You must tell me for what purpose you sought me out here this morning Oh brother, for nothing but your good I had nothing at heart but your unspeakable profit And great and endless good So then, you indeed knew that I was here I was told so by a friend, but I did not believe him At least I did not know that it was true till I saw you Tell me this one thing then, Robert And all shall be forgotten and forgiven Who was that friend? You don't know him, sir How then does he know me? I cannot tell Was he here present with you today? Yes, he was not far distant He came to this hill with me Where then is he now? I cannot tell Then, wretch, confess that the devil was that friend Who told you I was here And who came here with you None else could possibly know of my being here Ah, how little you know of him Would you argue that there is neither man Nor spirit endowed with so much foresight As to deduce natural conclusions from previous actions And incidents but the devil? Alas, brother! But why should I wonder at such abandoned notions and principles? It was foreordained that you should cherish them And that they should be the ruin of your soul and body Before the world was framed Be assured of this, however, that I had no aim Of seeking you but your good Well, Robert, I will believe it I am disposed to be hasty and passionate It is a fault in my nature But I never meant or wished you evil And God is my witness That I would as soon stretch out my hand to my own life Or my father's as yours At these words, Ringham uttered a hollow, exulting laugh Put his hands in his pockets and withdrew his space To his accustomed distance George continued And now, once and for all I request that we may exchange forgiveness And that we may part and remain friends Would such a thing be expedient, think you? Or consistent with the glory of God? I doubt it I can think of nothing that would be more so Is it not consistent with every precept of the gospel? Come, brother, say that our reconciliation is complete Oh yes, certainly, I tell you, brother According to the flesh It is just as complete as the larks is with the adder No more so, nor ever can Reconciled forsooth To what would I be reconciled? As he said this He strode indignantly away From the moment that he heard his life was safe He assumed his former insolence and revengeful looks And never were they more dreadful than on parting with his brother That morning on top of the hill Well, go thy way, said George Some would despise, but I pity thee If thou art not a limb of Satan I never saw one The sun had now dispelled the vapors And the morning being lovely beyond description George sat himself down on the top of the hill And pondered deeply on the unaccountable incident That had befallen to him that morning He could in no wise comprehend it But taking it with other previous circumstances He could not get quit of a conviction That he was haunted by some evil genius In the shape of his brother As well as by that dark and mysterious wretch himself In no other way could he account for the apparition He saw that morning on the face of the rock Nor for several sudden appearances of the same being In places where there was no possibility Of any foreknowledge that he himself was to be there And as little that the same being If he were flesh and blood like other men Could always start up in the same position With regard to him He determined therefore on reaching home To relate all that had happened From beginning to end to his father Asking his counsel and his assistants Although he knew full well that his father Was not the fittest man in the world To solve such a problem He was now involved in party politics Overhead and ears And moreover he could never hear the names Of either of the ringums mentioned Without getting into a quandary of disgust and anger And all that he would dine to say of them was To call them by all the appropriate names He could invent It turned out as the young man from the first suggested Old Dahl Castle would listen to nothing concerning them With any patience George complained that his brother harassed him With his presence at all times and in all places Old Dahl asked why he did not kick the dog Out of his presence whenever he felt him disagreeable George said he seemed to have some demon for a familiar Dahl answered that he did not wonder a bit at that For the young spark was the third in a direct line Who had all been children of adultery And it was well known that all such were born Half-deals themselves And nothing was more likely than that They should hold intercourse with their fellows In the same style did he sympathize With all his son's late sufferings and perplexities In Mr. Adam Gordon however George found a friend who entered into all his feelings And had seen and known everything about the matter He tried to convince him that at all events There could be nothing supernatural in the circumstances And that the vision he had seen on the rock Among the thick mist was the shadow of his brother Approaching behind him George could not swallow this For he had seen his own shadow on the cloud And instead of approaching to ought like his own figure He perceived nothing but a halo of glory Round a point of the cloud that was whiter And purer than the rest Gordon said if he would go with him To a mountain of his fathers Which he named an Aberdeenshire He would show him a giant spirit of the same dimensions Any morning at the rising of the sun Provided he shone on that spot This statement excited George's curiosity exceedingly And being disgusted with some things about Innenberg And glad to get out of the way He consented to go with Gordon to the Highlands for a space The day was accordingly set for their departure The old lairds ascent obtained And the two young sparks parted In a state of great impatience for their excursion End of section 6