 Do you catch yourself hating someone for no reason? Does someone or a group of people make you feel uncomfortable or infuriate you for no reason each time you see them? It turns out there is a reason for this. Author of Rachel's Holiday, Marian Keyes said, The things we dislike most in orders are the characteristics we like least in ourselves. Also Carl Jung said, Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves. In other words, what I dislike most in you is what I dislike most in me. When someone causes you no harm or slight, yet you still dislike them, chances are they stare some kind of insecurity or uncertainty deep in yourself. Perhaps they reflect the trait you dislike about yourself. Perhaps you envy them for something. Maybe you say some random YouTuber is extremely annoying but you actually just hate them for getting the Nintendo Switch a week early, says Patrick Hessmann, a North Carolina-based motivational speaker, web developer, character entertainer. Famous German novelist Hermann Hessey published a book in 1919 titled Demian, a story of struggle between youthful ideals and truth that ultimately resolves in realization of oneself. In the book, the author wrote, If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. American self-help author, coach, lecturer and teacher, Debbie Ford explains the phenomena in an affecting way. We see only that which we are. I like to think of it in terms of energy. Imagine having a hundred different electrical outlets on your chest. Each outlet represents a different quality. The qualities we acknowledge and embrace have covered plates over them. They are safe. No electricity runs through them. But the qualities that are not okay with us, which we have not yet owned, do have a charge. So when others come along, who act out one of these qualities, they plug right into us. In other words, the flaws in other people that affect us the most are the flaws we actually find despicable in ourselves. As Kallia and Ross from Pinch of Attitude writes, Everyone is our mirror. Our own reflection in others shows us not only who we are, but also how to be better. Of course, this does not mean if you dislike criminals, assassins, rapists, serial killers and manipulative people, it is a reflection of something in yourself. No. What this writers mean is that this kind of dislike has a very particular energy. A certified Czech practitioner and holistic lifestyle coach, Nisha Srivastava wrote, You're triggered by another person in a way that's obsessive and almost irrational. When you hate the same kind of people wherever you go, what you dislike in them is likely something you dislike about yourself. Too often, what we do is that we force standards on others that we require of ourselves, with a man from others what we wish we could give. This may stem from insecurity, a neighbor living next door might infuriate you, not because he keeps doing something that hurts you, but because he is more of a happy-go-lucky, readily loved by all around because he is outgoing, jovial and very sociable. Your reasons for disliking him may stem from observing that you like the social traits which you would have loved to exhibit. Since you don't have it, why should he? Patrick Hesman writes, When you identify the insecurity that a person you dislike for seemingly no good reason breeds, you can address the real problem instead of projecting it onto someone else. After all, toxic emotions can breed unwanted health problems. Why not help yourself instead of hurting? When we judge others about some flaws they have, it is most likely that we are judging ourselves for the same flaws we have. Meeting people and relating with them may show us our strength and weaknesses. Why? Their imperfections reveal our own imperfections. The safest exit is to accept those imperfections as we will not start to deal with them for good until we accept them. How to leverage this? There is a good side to knowing this truth that others imperfections which you hate actually reveals imperfections you dislike in yourself. It is that seeing someone you hate reveals who you are and who you can be to you. This is actually an opportunity to know more about yourself and your struggles and how to deal with them. You can also know what is stopping you from becoming your best self. For example, where you find that you dislike the neighbor because he is more sociable than you. It is a sign that you need to build your confidence through learning to build relationship with people. Entrepreneur Lauren Bacon wrote, Try this. Turn your thoughts to that person you keep running into at networking events whose elevator pitch always leaves you feeling greasy. The columnist whose opinions never failed to stoke the fires of your outrage. The once cool indie filmmaker who sold out and started dating fashion models or the word colleague who seems to have made sucking up to his superiors his job description. Any of the people who get under your skin or repel you. Where hating the person will do no good to your emotions but mess it up. Leveraging that discovery of your weakness to develop yourself will help your life in future. As Kallia and Ross wrote, Perhaps it's stubbornness that gets you the most. Whatever it is, the imperfection that makes you hate another human being is the imperfection that prevents you from being your best, happiest and most fulfilled self. And what you want to work towards is becoming your best, happier and most fulfilled self. Eric Allen said, Have you said I love you to yourself today? If you haven't, then you can certainly imagine how many others haven't. The world is simply a reflection of who we are. Perhaps it's time to fully embrace and love the one you see in the mirror. This reflection is the greatest gift we can give to each other. Infinite love to all. It's beautiful when you have noticed your flaws now so you can start to take advantage of it to build a better, happier life. The only way to be at peace with yourself is to acknowledge that you have the same flaws and be willing to do something about it. Kallianne wrote that, The people you dislike are the surface of the sea on a windless day. They don't just reflect who you are at the moment but also let you see the person you want to become. Will you stay ignorant of the mirror image or will you learn to own it? If this video inspired you, subscribe to our channel. We love you.