 Well, hello and welcome to Understand Men Now. I'm Jonathan Astley of johnathanastley.com, and I'm so excited to be doing this live stream for you today. Our topic, he's moving slow, the five signs he's into you. Now really quickly, if you're new to my YouTube channel, please hit the Subscribe button, hit the bell so you can be notified of new videos. And if any time during this video, the content resonates with you, please do me a favor and hit that Like button so I can be seen in the YouTube algorithms. Lastly, or not lastly, one of the things I wanna share with you is my coaching is what I call Heart-Centered Radical Honesty. It's direct, a little tough love and a lot of heart. And occasionally I use expletives to enhance the sentence. And if that's not your cup of tea, couple F-bombs every now and again, then I highly suggest logging off right now. And lastly, I'm up here to share my perspective, my opinions, I don't consider myself an expert, I am a coach, but I don't consider myself an expert. So I'm here to say these are just my opinions, take it for what it's worth. And if it resonates with you great, and if it doesn't, then that's okay too. All right, let's jump into the topic. He's moving slow, those five signs that he's into you. All right, so I wanna, when I thought about this title, or actually, I'll be candid with you. I took this title from another contemporary of mine. In fact, many of the titles that I choose are from other contemporaries, or I often do come up with my own as well. What I'm here to share though, is that the way people approach relationships is different. Every person approaches a relationship at a different pace. So there's not one size fits all. Some men come on strong, some men go slow, some men are romantic, some men are chivalrous, some men are clueless, some men are arrogant, some men are conceited, some men are narcissist, and some, and most men, however, are good guys. They're just bad daters, as I always say. And what I mean to say is men and women alike can be very bad at the dating process, because the reality is, is most human beings do a weak job of actually getting to know another human being. I'm gonna repeat that, most human beings do a weak job of actually getting to know another human being. In fact, it takes about 100 hours of face to face time to get to stage one of getting to know another human being. Think about that, that's 100 hours of face to face time just to get to stage one of getting to know another human being. That can take anywhere from six weeks to three months if you're seeing each other on a regular basis. And for those folks that are doing the long distance, they're counting on the telephone to create connection. And I'm here to say ladies, men do not bond through the telephone. We don't bond through the telephone. We bond through physical activities with you. So you're probably thinking, well, Jonathan, what does this have to do with men who go slow? Well, I know many of you have experienced men who come on strong, they come on strong. That coming on strong is oftentimes based on lust or limerence. I'm gonna repeat that, lust or limerence. And by the way, Google limerence, limerence simply means extreme infatuation, extreme infatuation that's driven biologically speaking. It's driven by chemistry. It's driven by chemicals being released in the brain, mostly dopamine that says to, that triggers the body to say, hunt, chase, hunt, chase, pursue, hunt, chase. So ladies, when you hear that men are on the hunt, men are in pursuit, men love the chase, it's usually the biological aspect of what's going on inside of them that's driven by lust or limerence or basically they wanna sleep with you, okay? So that's the come on strong. Then there's an other men that are very passive in the relationship process. Now, some men are passive in that they're not overly romantic and some men are passive because they're taking their time to actually get to know you in that 100 hour context that I was talking about a few moments ago. So you might be wondering, well, God, did this guy really like me? And you might be wondering, what are the signs that he really likes you? And that's what I'm about to share with you today, those five signs. So I'm gonna put on my trusty glasses. This is my notes for today. And by the way on Instagram, that's my notes. By the way, I'm recording this on Instagram right over there. So one of the signs, by the way, I wanna repeat this one thing. Oftentimes men are considered slow because they're not overly romantic. I'm gonna repeat that men are considered slow because they're not overly romantic. And I'm gonna go off on a tangent here first. So let me just bear with me for a second because I remember after the first bachelorette that was on, you know, the bachelor and bachelorette, there was Trista and Ryan. And I will never forget watching that episode of God that could have been 20 years ago now, or not quite 20 years ago, but at least a decade and a half ago. I remember Ryan wrote poetry to Trista. And I used to write poetry myself. And I remembered shortly after my divorce and I was dating, if I was felt that I liked a woman, I would actually write a poem for her. Now, I'm gonna tell you, that was rather cheesy. It was actually coming from a needy place inside me, that needy place to make someone to want to like me. Because when somebody is doing what I'm gonna say, romantic gestures to a total stranger, it's oftentimes to get a person to like them. So I'm bringing this up because remember we talked about men are come on strong, men are passive, but also oftentimes men who are not romantic are considered passive. And guys like myself that was overly romantic, that was actually coming from a needy place, that need to get you to like me. So I went off in a tangent, but I want you to get a sense of what I was talking about there. So now let's get into those five signs he's into you. And I think the first one is hugely important. And it says here, he clearly expresses, he seeks an exclusive relationship. He clearly expresses he seeks an exclusive relationship. Now I know a lot of you women have experienced men who state in the early stages of dating that they're seeking a relationship. But here's the thing about a relationship is oftentimes the relationship that they're seeking is could be what I call is friends with benefits, but you just don't know about it. What I mean is you're actually just a friend with benefit to him, but you're not aware of that. Or you're in a casual relationship or you're in what's known as a situation ship, okay? Situation ship, casual relationship, friends with benefits, you just don't know about it. Those are relationships that are ambiguous. They're ambiguous. And while some of them might include monogamy and exclusivity, or excuse me, yes, monogamy and exclusivity in the sense that they're not actively dating other people, it's ambiguous to the direction of a fully committed relationship that leads to either moving in together or getting married. I'm gonna repeat that. A fully committed relationship that either leads to moving in together or getting married or some sort of partnership between the two of them. So when a man right off the bat clearly states he seeks an exclusive, fully committed relationship with some sort of long-term direction, that's a great sign that he's into you, okay? That he likes you. That he sees you something more than casual or more than a situation ship. And situation ships are simply two people that spend time together that have no clue whether or not they're in a relationship or not. And I gotta tell you, a lot of women are experiencing this today. In fact, I spoke to a woman yesterday who communicated to me that she's been in an eight-year Friends with Benefits relationship, an eight-year Friends with Benefits relationship. This is a woman that started in her early 40s with this guy. She's in her late 40s right now. And this relationship isn't going anywhere. And he actually now pulled away completely from even the Friends with Benefits relationship. And she didn't go out and date anyone during this period of time. And that's most likely, I didn't dig deep enough, I didn't get the chance to dig deep enough, is that she was always hoping something would change. Something would change, something would change. Ladies, magic fairy dust doesn't change the outcome of your relationship. Intentionality changes the outcome of a relationship by being intentional from the very beginning. So a man who states clearly, he seeks an exclusive committed relationship with some sort of long-term potential to it is a great sign that he's into you. Okay, number two. Oh, you rarely go 48 hours without hearing from him. I repeat that, you rarely go 48 hours without hearing from him. Folks, I'm not a big proponent of incessant text messaging and an incessive communication like many of you desire. I can tell you, I've spoken to women that expect two, three, four, five, six, seven, eight, nine, 10 check-ins throughout the day. Otherwise they're losing their mind because he must be off with somebody else. Folks, we're suckling on the nipple of dependency. We're literally suckling on the nipple of, I need you to like me so I can feel good about myself. I need you to like me so I can feel good about myself. I need you to like me so I can feel good about myself. This is the dilemma many of us and myself and they're included. Remember when I talked about doing romantic things before I even know someone? That's an example of wanting someone to like me before I even knew them. This is why I'm such a big proponent of self-love in everybody's life. And if you're not familiar with this, I've written a book called What the Heck is Self-Love Anyway? What the Heck is Self-Love Anyway? There's a link below to get a copy of my book. It's a book of personal development, self-help and spiritual work. So you don't need someone to love you so you don't need someone to love you for you to be happy within yourself. And the man who's into you is still gonna check in on a regular basis. He's not gonna go more than 48 hours without checking in with you, see how you're doing. And hopefully it's a two-lane street. You're checking in with him. He checks in with you. It's not fully his responsibility to be the constant reaching out because I will tell you this ladies, men aren't necessarily designed to be the ones who reach out. I can tell you amongst my male friends, I mean, we hardly ever talk to one another. It's usually kind of a rarity when we get on the phone and call each other unless there's something going on. We don't check in with each other on a regular basis. That's not a male thing to do for say with other men. And even in relationship, it's not something that we were designed to do on an incessant basis, except for when we are on the hunt for sex, when we're pursuing sex, when we're on the hunt for sex, we'll check in with you a hundred times a day until we've gotten that conquest in. And then we go back to our old patterning of kind of being in our own world. However, a guy who's really into you, he's gonna check in with you on a regular basis. Okay, number three. Oh, if your schedules are off, if your schedules are off, he makes time for you at your convenience. Let me repeat that. So let's say he's got a busy life and you've got a busy life. Men who are not serious about a relationship, men who are not into you, are usually reaching out to you at, they're reaching out to you at his beck and call, right? In other words, it's on his timeline, his time schedule, when he wants to see you. When a man is into you, he makes time for you, when it's convenient at your schedule, as well as his own schedule. I'm gonna repeat that. He makes time for you at his own schedule and when it fits in with your schedule as well, because not everybody have identical schedules with one another. And so a man who's into you is making effort based on your schedule and not always at his beck and call, okay? Oh, number four, and I shared this in the title. This is the most important one. Number four is he genuinely appreciates talking and being with you. I'll repeat that. He genuinely appreciates talking and being with you. In other words, he feels good when you're together. He feels good when you're together. This past weekend was my birthday and I got to spend it with my best friend and his girlfriend. In fact, he took me to the Hollywood Bowl. I'm kind of lucky my best friend has the front box at the Hollywood Bowl. I mean, total privilege there. I mean, ballet, parking, cut through lines, meal service, the whole nine yards. I mean, thank you, Jeff, for that. And I was watching him and his girlfriend together and I'll be candid with you. I've known this man for over 35 years and I don't think I've ever seen him this happy in relationship. He's genuinely happy with his partner and to watch the two of them talk, you can just see how much he's into her because he genuinely feels good when he's with her. He genuinely feels good talking with her. Men who are into seek communication not from that needy place of I've got to dump all my problems and I just want you to listen place but from that place of curiosity, from that place of excitement, from that place of enthusiasm. When a man is into you, he enjoys talking with you. And while he may be perceived going slow, it's because he's not necessarily driven by lust. He's not necessarily driven by limerence nor is he driven by romance. He's actually driven by the desire of wanting to get to truly know you as another human being. Let me just say this. I throw men and women under the bus regularly. That's because for my world, I believe 80% of the human population or at least here in the United States anyway, the single population I should say is emotionally immature or emotionally stunted at best. Let me repeat that. 80%, this is just my perception of human beings, men and women like are emotionally immature or emotionally stunted at best. And what that means is they're not very good communicators of their emotions nor do they know how to navigate their inner world with a sense of peace. This is why I'm a big proponent of everybody reading the book, The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer, The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. This is chapter one and chapter two is learning how to talk to the voices in your head because what I'm here to say going back to feeling good, those men that feel good is that a lot of men don't feel good within themselves. So how can they even feel good with a partner? If a man or woman isn't operating from a place of self-worth, self-esteem, self-confidence, self-love, it makes it more challenging to be in a relationship and the less they love on themselves, the harder it is to be in relationship with another human being. And so I'm here to say, just to go back to my friend, when a guy is genuinely happy with his partner, he wants to be with her. Doesn't matter the pace of what the two are going at, because as I said before, the pace oftentimes is you might have an expectation of the pace here and his operating capacity is here and that's still a great place to go at because it's not a pace based on sex, it's not a pace based on neediness and it's not based on making you, making him try to make you like him. Is that making sense? Is this sinking in? If it is, please hit that like button and let me know. Okay, and the fifth and final way to tell if he's into you, he includes you in his outside life. I'm gonna repeat that, he includes you in his outside life. That includes his work, that includes his hobbies, that includes his kids, that includes his friends. You know, I'll be candid with you. I got an application for coaching the other day from a woman who's been in a year and a half relationship and I was floored to hear that she had never been to his home and only met his kids once and it was like a drive-by within a year and a half. I mean, really, really, this is a man you're in relationship with and you've never been to his home and you've never really met his kids. Now, my first reaction might be that he's still married. That's why I wasn't invited to her home but to the fact that he introduced to the kids, I mean, I'm assuming that he probably is divorced and he can have a variety of reasons why he didn't invite her to her home but a man who's into you will include you in his outside life, his work, his kids, his home, his hobbies and certainly his friends. And this woman has never met his friends, I mean, again, met the kids once and never been to the home. And to me, okay, I can understand why that might not happen in the first 90 days of dating. Maybe 120 days, but if, boy, if you haven't gotten to a place where you've been to the person's home and you're not actively in the life then why does the penis ever get to go inside the vagina on a regular basis? I'm gonna repeat that. And I know this is kind of vulgar. Why is the penis allowed to go in the vagina on a regular basis if the person isn't allowing you, isn't inviting you into his life. And men who are into you, even the guys who go slow will invite you into his life in some way, shape or form, which includes work and I don't mean going to his work but I'm saying including you and what's happening in his work life, what's happening with his children, what's happening with his family, certainly his friends, and certainly his home, okay? Back most men are lazy. They want you to come to their home versus going to your home. But a man who's in you is going to do both, okay? So those are the five signs he's into you even if he's moving slow and I'm just gonna repeat them really quickly. Number one, he clearly expresses that he wants an exclusive relationship. Number two, you rarely ever go more than 48 hours without hearing from him. Number three, if your schedule's a little off, he makes time for you at your schedule and not just at his beck and call. Number four, he genuinely appreciates talking with you, being with you, he enjoys your company. And number five, he includes you in his outside life. All right, I just shared with you a bunch of content here. I hope it resonated with you. Please hit that like button. We're gonna, because we're on the live stream right now on YouTube, we're gonna take questions from the audience in the live chat. Just as a reminder, if you have a question, post the word question and then write the question thereafter. Also, you can purchase a super sticker and super chat for those that are live on the live stream right now. All the funds from the super stickers and super chats go to a scholarship fund in the name of my son Connor. Those who know me know my son Connor passed away a few years ago. And in his honor, in the honor of Connor, I've started a scholarship fund to defray the cost of personal development for those who can't afford full-blown personal development and they need some support in covering some of the costs. So purchase a super sticker, super chat and that also lets me know that I have provided good content for you as well. All right, so a question came in before I started here and I wanted to lean into it today. So I hope you find value in it. And the question is, I'm gonna post it in the comment section. Then we're gonna take questions from the audience. And the question is, Jonathan, why does it seem like I like men more than they like me? Jonathan, why does it seem I like men or seem like I like men more than they like me? And I think this is a great question and I pondered on this quite a bit for before I was preparing for this. And it occurs to me that this is a common narrative in the dating, mating, and relating process. And this is actually something I heard in a movie called The Ghost of Girlfriend's Past, The Ghost of Girlfriend's Past, which is Matthew McConaughey plays a player for his character as a player. And he's talking to his uncle, Michael Douglas, who's the quintessential player on the planet. And at one point, Michael Douglas is giving advice to a young Matthew McConaughey in the movie. And he says, the person who cares the least has the most power. I'm gonna repeat that. The person who cares the least has the most power. And I thought about that and that was really a fascinating comment to say, but in some level, there's truth to it. The person who cares the least, the person who's the least romantic, the person who makes the least effort in relationship oftentimes has the power because the other person is wanting the other person to care more, to make more effort, to be more romantic. So they're doing things to try and coerce the other person. What's the word I'm thinking of? Darn it, I'm brain dead here for a second. No, take that back. I'm not brain dead. Brain fogged right now. And so liking them. And this is oftentimes I witness women who give their power away to another human being. Let me repeat that. Women give their power away to men oftentimes. Now, in some ways, you're set up for this because the whole dating dance, the mating dance is been predicated throughout history that men are the leaders of the relationship. In fact, throughout history, it's always been a one-up, one-down dynamic, meaning men are literally, not figuratively, literally on top of women. In other words, they are in charge of the relationship. So literally throughout history, you've been indoctrinated with this understanding in relationship that men are in charge, they get to do whatever they want, and women have to follow. So I think on some level, you've just been indoctrinated with giving your power away to men. And that includes caring more than they care for you. This is why, by the way, my coffee mug says do all things with love, do all things with love, which is apropos with what I'm about to share right now. Because folks, I really want to encourage for the person who wrote in, reading the book If the Buddha Dated, If the Buddha Dated. This is a great book to lean into a non-gender specific way of approaching relationship but really approaching a relationship from a heart-centered space of not giving your power away to another human being by retaining your sovereignty so you can actually evaluate the relationship based on how much investment he's making into the relationship. Let me repeat, you're evaluating the relationship based on his investment. So for those who follow my work know, I like to use the analogy of two cars traveling down a road relatively at the same speed. That's a relationship in a two-lane street. In other words, a two-lane street. In other words, you're traveling at relatively the same pace. But if your pace is much ahead of his and he's dragging back, and again, this isn't about moving slowly, it's about how much his effort is. He's not demonstrating he wants an exclusive relationship. He doesn't necessarily feel like he's having enjoyment when he's with you. He doesn't check in with you regularly, okay? Just what I named, just to repeat those five things. He expresses exclusivity. You rarely ever go 48 hours without talking to each other. He schedules time at your schedule and not necessarily always his schedule. He appreciates talking with you and finally he includes you in his outside life. Men who care less don't do those things in relationship and men who genuinely care genuinely into you will make that kind of effort. And so when you're in a relationship where you care about him more than he cares about you, I highly recommend having a serious conversation within the relationship and to determine if it even makes sense to be together. Ladies, if you follow my work, you know, and I repeatedly talk about the book Eight Dates by Doctors John and Julie Gottman. Eight Dates by Doctors John and Julie Gottman. Why I recommend this book, especially before the penis ever goes inside the vagina, is that you better, it's, listen, I'm a big proponent, ladies, of what I call pre-qualifying your prospect. In fact, those who hire me for coaching, and by the way, there's a link to a discovery call with me to see if working with a coach is right for you. My job, my expertise is to help you pre-qualify your prospect. In other words, determine the true compatibility between two people, learning how to ask the right questions to determine compatibility and how to vet for emotional maturity. Because if you follow my work, you are familiar with the relationship iceberg, the relationship iceberg. I'm gonna put a little bit closer on the screen and the relationship iceberg goes like this. This is the top above the water line is attraction and the tip of the iceberg is chemistry. What's below the iceberg is shared values, blendable lifestyles and emotional maturity. And as you start checking these boxes, the water line of attraction starts going down. But sadly, in many cases, many of you don't share the same values, many of you don't have lifestyles or blendable. And lastly, as I said before, 80% of the population is emotionally immature or emotionally stunted at best. And this is men and women alike. So what's the most important theme of what I share just now? It starts with self-love folks. Again, my book, What the Heck is Self-Love Anyway is such an important tool to lean into loving on oneself. This isn't feminine, feminine. I'm going off on a tangent here because I get off on the whole concept of masculine feminine energy because I know many of you have been indoctrinated. If you just sit in your feminine energy, a man will just naturally gravitate towards you because being in your feminine is just so magical. What a crock of shit that is in my opinion. You know what's magical is self-empowerment, self-reliance, self-discipline, self-respect. I shared earlier about a woman who's been in a year and a half relationship with a man who's never been to his home. What kind of self-respect is that for you? I'm sorry to judge that. I mean, well, I'm not sorry to judge it, but if that sounds judgy, my apologies. But I'm here to say self-respect means you actually, again, if you're having sex with another human being on a regular basis, you have every right to learn things about their life. I gotta tell you something. There are a lot of scam artists out there. There's a lot of flaky people out there. It's important to vet this person. I mean, we should be doing background checks and have police investigative, not detective investigations or background investigations on people because nowadays, when you're meeting total strangers, especially off the internet folks, it's a scary place if you do not know somebody that knows this person, it's a scary place to be for men and women alike and mostly women. So I'm here to encourage vetting much better jobs so you don't find yourself in a situation where you care about him more than he cares about you and he has all the power in relationship. If you wanna retain your power, retain your sovereignty, your self-esteem, your self-confidence by loving on yourself. Is this sinking in? Is this resonating? Please let me know. I wanna thank that person who called in for that question or wrote in that question. Thanks a bunch. All right, let's take a look at what we have here. Really quickly, I saw a super sticker a moment ago that I wanna thank the person and it all sadly, it disappeared. So bear with me everyone. I'm just, oh my God, we have a lot of questions. All right, bump, bump, bump, bump, bump. Question from Gina. And the question is, hi, Jonathan. How can I tell the difference between love bombing and someone who is just very affectionate and open by nature? How can you do that? That's a great question because I have a habit, I know from my own personal experience, I have a habit of being a bit demonstrative and effusive when chemistry is running amok. So to me, being excited and enthusiastic is a very common thing. Remember I shared earlier about limerence? Limerence means extreme infatuation. And it's very common for men to be expressive when they have extreme infatuation. I think love bombing is more trying to convince you to like them versus the vocalization that they like you. Let me repeat that love bombing is an attempt to get you to like them versus just vocalizing they like you. I think what's most important to differentiate the two is to learn your own self, to learn your own self, to actually really pay attention to how you're feeling when this person is giving this affection towards you. Now here's the problem with this. A lot of you women are emotionally stunted and emotionally immature. So any attention from a guy feels wonderful. So if you're suckling on the nipple of I need you to love me so I can feel good about myself, there's almost no way to determine the difference because you're feeding off of the energy of the love bombing or the infatuation from a place of lack within yourself. Let me repeat that you're feeding off of it from a lack within yourself because a woman who's truly or a man who's truly in their self love, they can tell the difference between love bombing and genuine infatuation or genuine like because one doesn't feel good and the other does. Let me repeat that when a person is loving on themself they can differentiate between the people that are love bombing versus the ones who are not love bombing and that's my interpretation of the answer. That's my perception, my answer to your question based on my experience. And that is when it doesn't feel right, it's usually love bombing and when it feels good, it's typically just genuine infatuation for those women who are actually loving on themselves from a place of strength and confidence and not from a place of neediness. Does that resonate with you? I hope it does. All right, I wanna quickly thank Liana Pollux for the $20 super sticker. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that. That just made my day and that goes into the scholarship fund for Connor or for those that are seeking personal development but it's in his name. All right, our next question from Nicole. Question, I always wondered the moment you're thinking about this guy you like if he's also thinking about you too. Ooh, that's an interesting one. So that's where two people are actually connected with one another. And I've actually done some work in that area. I've done something where I would say to myself, God, it's been so long. I said, to my basic self connecting to my higher self. So let me say that. I believe we have a basic self and a higher self, okay? And what I would do is invite myself my basic self to connect with my higher self. And then I would say to my higher self, I would like you to connect with universal energy. That's where everybody's higher self are hanging out with one another. So I'd simply say, and I would say, I'll use Nicole. I'd say to my basic self, to my higher self, I request a connection. And then my higher self, I request a connection to source energy. And I would say to source energy, I would like to connect to my partner, Nicole. I would literally, I've done this before. And I share this with you with the intent from an energetic perspective to actually send a signal to my partner, to see if they would reach out to me. And what's weird is, I mean, this has happened a number of times. I've actually gotten a text message, a phone call, or some sort of indication from the person I was dating. They reached out to me because I sent them a message, an energetic message. By the way, that's true wireless connectivity. When you can connect with your higher self and to someone else's higher self. So now in reverse, is this happening? In other words, is it happening without this request to connect with higher self? I do believe people that are truly connected with one another oftentimes can feel each other's energy. I am a true believer we can actually feel another's energy. I've been in relationship with, my most significant relationship after my divorce, we were together six years on and off. I could be on the phone with her and literally within 10 seconds, based on maybe five words coming out of her mouth, I could feel the energy from her. The more familiar we get with another human being, the actual more empathy we have for another human being and empathy to me is not only feeling someone else's feelings, it's also caring about someone else's feelings. And most importantly, it's caring for your own feelings. Let me repeat that genuine empathy is actually caring about your own feelings and not compromising your feelings. And I say this because I witnessed so many women who literally don't honor their feelings in relationship. When I wrote my book, what the heck is self love anyway? Chapter one is speak your truth, do it with kindness. And I can tell you, I witnessed women over and over again that do not speak up in relationship because they're afraid of scaring the guy away. And I'm here to say, just as in my book chapter nine, if it's sincere and from the heart, you can't say the wrong thing to the right person. So folks, I wanna encourage you that you don't need a wireless connection to connect with your guy. You can actually pick up the phone and connect with your guy. However, if you wanna send an energetic signal to your guy or girl, then maybe take your basic self, connect to your higher self, ask your higher self to connect to source energy and ask source energy to do the work and see what happens. So Nicole, I'd like to suggest that you give that a chance and see what happens. Please let me know. Great question, thank you so much. All right, our next question, Monique says, question, a male friend who's in a relationship says, it's over between them. He likes to come for a visit and just talk, totally platonic. I'm not attracted to him. Is it acceptable in your opinion? Is it acceptable in your opinion? Well, you know what? I wouldn't, you don't need to ask for my opinion. What you should do is look inward and ask yourself, how do you feel about this situation again, from a place of empowerment and not from a place of need. So it might simply mean that he is seeking female energy, not feminine energy, female energy for someone to talk to because men have a hard time talking to other men about their feelings. So he's most likely coming at you from a platonic space. Now, oftentimes when someone's broken up with someone and they reach out to another female, they would like that female energy, but they would also like that female vagina. So they might be nice for a little while because they would like to have the vagina as well as the female energy. So this is where boundaries are hugely important. If you do not want to pursue a romantic relationship with them, I would highly encourage to have healthy boundaries. However, I will tell you his reasoning behind it. He would like female energy to talk about what's happened for him, which doesn't benefit or serve you any. And most likely he wants to prepare himself to get inside your vagina. That's not always the case, but that does happen a lot. And that's just my perception on it. Ultimately, you have to decide to do what's most important for yourself. Always choose how do you feel first about a situation before you ever seek advice from someone else. Ask yourself, how do you feel about this situation? That's my invitation for you in this particular case. I hope that helps. If it does, please hit that like button, let me know. All right, let's keep going. Let's keep swimming. Let's keep swimming. Let's keep swimming. Vivian says, Jonathan, hello, I missed you lately. Have been too busy to see your big hugs. Thank you so much, big hugs back to you. Oh, someone says happy birthday to me. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that. It was on August 1st. Thank you so much. Kim says, I cannot believe people are so boring as to wanna debate politics on a date. I'd be out the door fast. I'm in agreement. If you two are not aligned on politics, that usually means you're not aligned on your values. And if you're not aligned on your values, how well of two partners can you be with one another? Now, for those that have extreme ideologies, that's what I'm talking about. Not those that are close to the vest. But I do believe politics is actually a good conversation to have because it does give you insight into a person's values. And so how people feel about certain things gives you a great amount of, you know, here's the thing. It used to be, a lot of dating advice would be, if a guy was, you know, gave a stingy tip on a date, that means he's cheap. Okay, first off, that doesn't mean he's cheap. Okay, by the way, if someone paid for a date, that shows generosity. So to judge how much they gave on a tip. But you wanna know, if you really wanna get to know another human being, talk about politics, talk about religion, because that gives you insight into two of the most important subjects that's in the world today. I'm gonna repeat that. Those are two of the most important subjects in the world today. What's happening, politics is just a reflection of what's happening in the world. And religion is a reflection of what's happening in the world. So I'm here to say they are actually important conversations to have, it's a lot better than seeing if a guy just was a little stingy on by 5% on a tip. Anyway, that's my suggestion, Kim, thanks for the question. I really appreciate that. All right, let's keep swimming. Let's keep, oh, Becca writes, question. If you have two, wait, if you two have sex on the third date without being said to be exclusive, and then he said he's going with the flow, is that a bad sign? If two people have sex on the third date without it being exclusive, or the words, it's exclusive, and then he said it's going with the flow, is that a bad sign? So I have a rule of thumb when it comes to sex, and this is my rule of thumb. Write this down, the acronym is CARES. Here, let me write it down for you. Hold on a second, C-A-R-E-S, CARES. There it is on the YouTube screen, there it's on the Instagram screen. All right, CARES. The C stands for do not have sex until you feel comfortable, comfortable, comfortable. And what I mean is you should never feel pressured to have sex with another person. You should never be careful of alcohol consumption that might lower your boundaries. So be in a state of feeling comfortable. The A stands for be aware of the consequences. If you bond easily to a man, having a base, a man, especially on a third date, if you bond really quickly, be aware of the consequences, because here's the thing. First off, having sex once doesn't require exclusivity. Having sex on a regular basis, if you're like me, monogamy and exclusivity is important, it's better to have the conversation about it. The R stands for real intentions. Learn his real intentions, okay? And that would mean are you seeking a fully committed relationship that's going somewhere or are you just going with the flow? The E stands for exclusivity. Ladies, I'm gonna tell you something. I'm very upfront in the dating process. I tell women very early on, if we're dating and we are intimate together, I'd like to be exclusive. How do you operate? Folks, the word exclusivity should be discussed before the penis ever goes inside the vagina, okay? The idea, if you're gonna have regular sex with someone, then you better have a conversation, at least if not after the first time you have sex, before it gets to go the second time and the third time and the fourth time and the fifth time, you better discuss exclusivity. And the S in cares, C-A-R-E-S, the S stands for safety. Now, that could mean wearing a condom, that could mean getting STD tests, okay? But make sure you're safe. Just like comfortable, it's safety as well as comfortable. And folks, if you're not following this rule of thumb, especially the exclusivity part, then it's on you, not on him, because guys will just go with the flow and if you're gonna follow the man's lead, he just wants to go with the flow and guess what's gonna happen? He's going with the flow, you get attached to him, you're hooked and then you're fucked because he has all the power. Like I said before, the person who cares the least or the person who makes the least effort is the one who retains the power in relationship and that's unhealthy power in relationship and I'm not a big proponent of unhealthy power in a relationship. Can I please get an amen? I feel like a preacher. Thank you so much for that question. Becca, that was a great question. All right, bump, bump, bump, I'm swimming, I'm swimming. All right, question. If you're willing to travel to meet this guy you like, would he take the relationship to the next level which I'm willing to relocate? So I'm gonna share a very sad story I read on the news the other day. There was a woman who'd been communicating with a man I believe on Instagram for two months. She traveled to Arizona to go visit him. I believe she lived in Colorado or someplace farther away. And on their first date, they went hiking. He abandoned her during the hike and she died. Folks, she was meeting a total stranger, okay? Folks, I'm here to, I'm sorry to be very blunt here but when you're investing time in a total stranger, I think it's hugely important to find out as much information and if you're going to travel to another area to be with someone or at least another state or in California, I mean, it could take a plane ride to get to the other part of the state. But not but and I'm here to say that that person. Now, to the extent that women are more apt to pretzel themselves and re-accommodate themselves for the guy. Let me repeat that. Women are more apt to pretzel themselves and redesign their entire life for a guy and that's not healthy either. Folks, I'm not a big proponent of this. Now, that's not to say that you can't, I mean this, by the way, there have been plenty of people throughout history that have had long distance relationship and the woman oftentimes is the one who's making the bigger compromise in this area and it's worked out. It certainly can happen. But it's not necessarily a guarantee that he likes you more because he's doing it because quite frankly, he's lazy in the process because he wants it at his terms and not necessarily at your terms. When a guy genuinely likes you, he's looking at alternate ways other than making it all about you coming to him, he's finding alternate ways to make the relationship work. So it's not a one-sided type of arrangement. And in this particular case, Nicole, I'm not sure how I advise you other than to say I would wanna certainly vet the motherfucker as much as you can and please excuse my terminology about motherfucker but I would wanna vet that person as much as I can. By the way, wouldn't it be, I'm gonna go off on a tangent here. Folks, wouldn't it be great if you could call the ex-spouse of some guy you're dating to find out about the person? Wouldn't that, well, not a preliminary frame that. I said it, wouldn't that be great? Wouldn't that be interesting to actually find out about a person by calling or speaking to their friends, family and their ex-relationships? By the way, since I was in a relationship with someone, actually I'm gonna say this out loud. I was in a significant relationship with someone and I am more than happy to give her telephone number to anyone I'm dating if they want to check me out because I'd like to think she would give me rape reviews even though our relationship didn't work out. Not sure my ex-wife would say that but I think she'd be kind and generous. But for the most part, my suggestion in this particular case and I know I went off on a tangent, be careful pretzeling your life for another human being because oftentimes it doesn't work out the way you think. Remember, a relationship is a two lane street, not you compromising a significant about your life and I recognize that you might have the capacity relocate and that's certainly fine. I would just do it with a lot more caution because sadly what we just found out the other day about this woman who traveled to Arizona is I don't want anyone to ever experience that in their life. Oh my God, it broke my heart to read that. So thank you for allowing me to share, Nicole. I really appreciate that question. Thank you so much. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. Kelly writes, I had a friend with benefits with a Leo born today. I just had commitment issues. I liked him, but he was white and I was young though he though, but we talked for six years. I moved away and told him wrong time. Well, thank you for sharing that. By the way, men and women are just his app to having a friends with benefits relationship and being absolutely okay with it. I don't judge friends with benefits relationships. I'm only here to say is typically one person sees it as friends with benefits and the other person wants something more and if you're wanting more it rarely ever, ever, ever, ever works out. At least in my experience that's the case. All right, if you have a question purchase a super sticker, super chat or post the word question and write the question there after. And it looks like we're getting some amens on my previous comment, amen. And amen, thank you so much. KK says, I dare you guys say happy birthday. He might get distracted. Thank you so much. And my birthday was six days ago. So thank you so much. August 1st, I am a Leo. All right, if you have a question post the word question or purchase a super sticker, super chat. Okay, Montel Willis writes question. Can men and women truly be friends or does sex always get in the way? Why is it always a pissing contest? Can men and women truly be friends? First off, the answer is absolutely men and women can be friends. Now, can former couples who are in relationship shift their relationship from romantic to something else? I think so under a few circumstances. First and foremost is that they each have contained their sexual desire for one another. In other words, they have contained it. They are not covertly or subconsciously seeking sex with the other person. Number one, number two, I think it's very important not to engage in a lot of emotional conversations with one another. What happens with emotional conversations is something called emotional sex. And since I previously referenced my ex-girlfriend, I wanna talk about her. She wrote a book, Dr. Sherry Myers wrote a book called Chatting or Cheating, chatting or cheating. And one of the things she discusses is something called emotional sex. So if two people are friends and they're talking on an emotional level on a regular basis, that creates emotional sex, not intercourse sex, but a intimate relationship with someone and it makes it very difficult to actually be open to emotional conversations with your partner if you're filtering a lot of your emotional conversation with this friend or ex-lover. So one, there's no sexual desire between the two of you and two, there's no frequent emotional conversations. Then to that extent, the conversations tend to be more surface level. And I'm okay with friendships on a surface level. When I say I'm okay with that, I mean everybody should do what they want. But I'm here to say for example, with my ex Sherry, and there's a picture of her right there, I'll show that on Instagram right there, that's a picture of her, she's gorgeous. I'm here to say that when we split up, one of the things we agreed was we were gonna discontinue a lot of emotional conversations with one another because that would lead to emotional sex. In other words, emotional conversations are very intimate conversations that can heighten our sexuality for another person. And then once our sexuality gets triggered, we wanna have sex with the person, then it's no longer friendship, it's no longer platonic. So that's my approach to that question. Can men and women be friends? Yes, they can be. I have lots of female friends and some of them are ex-lovers. And it's with the understanding that we do not desire each other sexually anymore and that we do not engage in incessant, emotional or intimate conversations with one another, and I think that's a more healthier way to approach it. All right, Montel, thank you so much, great question. I wanna thank Danielle for your super sticker of 99 cents, thank you so much, I appreciate that. All right, let's see what we have here in the way of questions, questions, questions. Regent says, Jonathan, the picture behind you with your book looks very adorable. So folks, that's the picture of me in my book, what the heck is self-love? Anyway, I know on Instagram you can't see that, but thank you so much. I do change these pictures on a regular basis. They're from a company called Mixtiles, M-I-X-T tiles, M-I-X tiles, Mixtiles. I bought about a hundred of these and I changed these pictures up for every video. All right, you know what? I think this would be a good time. This is the time of the live stream that you can ask me personal questions. We're gonna wrap up this live stream soon and from this point forward, these are all any personal questions you have of me. So long as they're not crossing a boundary for me, I'm gonna do my best to answer these personal questions. Where's my hair off? There's that right here. And if you have a personal questions, post it in the chat box and I'm gonna do my best to respond. All right, Karina says, how do we navigate the dating world with all the red pill garbage that's rampant in the dating scene? My invitation, don't read it. Don't read garbage and you won't be bothered by it, okay? All right, let's see what we have here. Emmy says, question, how soon after a break up to date? My friend timing off, but now is good. Each person is different about the timing of when to, I think a significant marriage, you should take a good two year break to really find out who you are for yourself, okay? Most significant relationships, if they're a year or longer, I would say three to six months, take a break from actively dating or being connected to another human being and that there's separation between you and the previous partner. There is separation between you and that previous partner and that's a healthier way to approach it or at least that's my invitation. All right, hope that answered your question. Thank you so much, Emmy. I wanna thank Sal Gray who, oh, she wrote a question. Okay, so bear with me. I'm gonna find this question. All right, tall Saul, okay, question. I started a necessary custody case so the father won't steal away my children to the reservation. What are your recommendations to keep up self love and keep me from turning cold and bitter? Ooh, that's a tough one. So whenever we have conflict with another human being recognize that each person has their own point of view on how to approach things. And oftentimes when there's custody battles there's one person that feels they're right and the other person's there feel right. I'm a big proponent of daily personal development, self-help and spiritual work. Like I talk about in my book, what the heck is self love? Anyway, I would recommend 15 to 30 minutes a day with books like Return to Love from Marianne Williamson, Return to Love from Marianne Williamson. The book's The Untethered Soul like I spoke about before, The Untethered Soul and investing 15 to 30 minutes a day in some sort of personal development, self-help and spiritual work to maintain your sovereignty and inner peace because the reality is contention isn't gonna go away. What you can do on your own time is do your best to love on yourself which will create inner peace. And when you're feeling a sense of inner peace you're gonna feel a lot better about the process. And lastly, Michael Singer also wrote a book called The Surrender Experiment, The Surrender Experiment. Why I recommend this book, Sal, is that it's all about understanding acceptance. When you can actually come from a place of acceptance, you're gonna feel a greater sense of inner peace and that's my invitation for you in this particular case. I'm sorry you're going through this contention, I'm sending you a big, gigantic Jonathan Bear hug of self love. All right, thank you so much. All right, if you have a personal question to me like Lillian just wrote, do you ever come to Florida? I haven't been to Florida in a decade but I do have several clients there and a few friends and my hope is to go visit them. Hopefully I go visit them with a girlfriend. That would be my ideal situation. So that's my intent to visit Florida when ideally when I have a great partner in my life or certainly when I wanna visit those friends and I hope to actually come out there in the next year. So to answer your question, that's the answer to that. Question, Nicola writes, what are your thoughts on speed dating? So my thoughts on speed dating is it's rare that two people actually ever connect at a speed dating event. However, I mean I'm not suggesting it doesn't happen but it's rare that you're gonna meet your life partner at a speed dating event. What the speed dating event does is help you with your people skills, with your people skills. You know, it's interesting, I came across my book or not my book, a copy of the book, Dale Carnegie's how to win and influence people, how to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie. And why I'm bringing this up is this is a great book to start reading from a dating perspective. I just found it in my bookshelf the other day and I thought, oh, I'm gonna shoot some videos based on the concepts of this book. So speed dating is a great place to practice your interpersonal, your people skills. So when you feel uncomfortable because that's what speed dating oftentimes feels like, that's a great place to do some practicing, all right? So I hope that helps. Great question there, Nicole, thank you so much. Folks, if you have a personal question of me, post it there and I'm gonna do my best to respond. All right. Becca says, question, where do you shoot your balcony YouTube videos? Well, very simply, I shoot them on my balcony. I live in Redondo Beach, folks. And I live literally over the water or at the marina and I have a nice balcony where I live and I shoot my Sunday videos, my calmer, more relaxed videos on Sunday. I should watch, I shoot the videos prior to Sunday but those are the ones I post on Sunday. So that's where I shoot them. My balcony is right over there. So thank you so much. Lynn S says, for the cheesehead, she gave me $5. Thank you so much for that's my son, Colin and I. We were in Amsterdam, the cheese capital of the world I think and we put on these cheeseheads and thank you so much for that one. Nicola writes, Jonathan, when are you coming to England? I don't know. I was in Paris with Colin. And matter of fact, when we were in Amsterdam, we were supposed to go to England but we didn't make it. So hopefully when I'm in a significant relationship we get to travel the world together. That would be my hope. So thank you so much for that question. Again, if you have a personal question for me, post it and I'm gonna do my best to respond. Oh, this is a great question. Emmy writes, do you ever get frustrated with us? Do you ever get frustrated with us? If I'm in full transparency, yeah, I get frustrated with a lot of things. Partially because it's my judgment. I'll be candid, it's a judgment to get frustrated. Where my most frustration lies is when someone, when someone who doesn't agree with what I have to say, they attack me as a person and not my ideas. In fact, I don't even like the idea of attacking someone's ideas. And certainly I don't appreciate when someone attacks me as a person. Those of you know I've been criticized as being a narcissist. I've recently, some woman posted, Jonathan, you just posted about your birthday. You're such a narcissist. And I'm like, look it. I was sharing with my audience. It was my birthday. I was feeling happy. And did I appreciate the love I got from all of you? Thank you for the love and kindness. So I get frustrated, sure, when people attack me or if you attack, even attacking my ideas. I'm a big proponent. If you don't like what someone says, share an alternate point of view from a place of kindness, not from a place of confrontation. Because confrontation is one of the reasons why most relationships are struggling to get. This is why I'm a big proponent of everybody reading the book, Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. Nonviolent Communication by Marshall Rosenberg. This will teach us, it teaches people how to communicate in a less violent way. So to the extent I get frustrated, that's the predominant reason why. All right, thank you for that question, Emmy. Question, where do you live? I thought it was Florida. No, I live in Redondo Beach, California, just south of LAX airport. All right. Deep diver, oops, not deep diver, excuse me. Bear with me. Suzanne writes, what are you drinking in that cup of yours? The cup says, do all things with love. This was actually a gift from my ex-girlfriend. And I'm actually just drinking crystal light. No cocktail for me right now. So that's what's in my cup, thanks so much. I'm being attacked for not taking the vaccine even without understanding why. Folks, I understand why many people are reluctant to take the vaccine. In fact, you know what occurs to me? When I took the vaccine, there was this long laundry list of warning, warning, warning, warning, warning. You had to initial, initial, initial, initial. And after reading that, I was like, do I fucking want to take this vaccine? There was a lot of warning signs. You could basically grow a third toe, it's not a third toe, you can grow an extra six toe. You could have horns coming out. And that's not what it said, I'm being tongue-in-cheek. But there's some legitimate reasons why a person may be reluctant to do it. And to judge the other person for that reluctancy to me is a closed-minded way of thinking. And under the guise that it's all, you're helping humanity. I'm of the opinion everybody has a right to navigate their life the way they wish for themselves. And to judge another person for that is to me another form of judgment. And I'm not a big proponent of that. So that's my two cents on that. And again, I don't judge people who have taken the vaccine. I don't judge people who haven't taken the vaccine. That's the way I operate anyway. So I hope that answers your question. Sal writes, personal question, do you ever get the opportunity to have a birthday celebration with your son? Actually, this last birthday I was with my son. In fact, my boys, now I'm sad because Connor, my son who passed away, he used to always give me the cutest little birthday gifts. They're sitting on my desk right there. And Colin is generous as well. But my birthday is a tough day for me because it's all the milestones that are tough days for me. Connor's birthday, Connor's mother's day, Connor's mom's birthday, Connor's brother's birthday, the day he passed away. And my birthday are all within 70 days of each other. Literally within two months is what I call the corridor of hell. And so it's very tough time for me. And many people go through this at various different times in your life. Sometimes the holidays make you feel that way. Sometimes it's the loss of other people in our lives. In my particular case, it's hard to fully appreciate my birthday without my son, Connor. So I hope I answered your question. Thank you for asking. And yes, I do get to spend it with my other son, Colin. In fact, we were at the Hollywood Bowl last week for my last weekend for my birthday. So thank you so much. Deep Diver says, thank you so much. Kelly, excuse me, writes, thank you so much. This journey is self-love to unconditional love. Love, love, love. I wish you nothing but love, light and forever. Thank you so much. I really appreciate that, Kelly. And Deep Diver wrote something, personal question. Personal question, what is the insecurity most struggle with? And what are your most, what are you most confident about yourself? What are your insecurities? I think one of my insecurities is the most common insecurity of all most folks is I'm not good enough, I'm not lovable and I'm not likable. In fact, when a person is single and they haven't met their life partner and you've gone on date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date after date I'm being tongue-in-cheek here. But when you go on a lot of dates and it doesn't go anywhere, that can affect your self-esteem. I think what makes me confident within myself because I have been labeled feminine by a lot of men is that I'm very in touch with my feelings, which is not feminine, it's not masculine. To be in touch with your feelings and to continually work on navigating your feelings from a healthy place is to me not masculine or feminine, it's empowerment, empowerment. And I feel very empowered that I can be an incredibly great partner to a person. I do know this about myself. In fact, I do arrogantly believe I'm better than most men out there because I study this shit. I study this shit. I read the books that I think are more, have more value than watching the Kardashians or some sort of reality TV show on a regular basis. So I'm a big proponent of personal development, self-help and spiritual work. In fact, quite frankly, most women, I don't wanna say bore me, but I'm very rarely stimulated by a woman and I don't mean my penis being stimulated. I'm talking about my intellectual and emotional stimulation by a woman. I will tell you from a dating perspective, most women are as equally emotionally immature and stunted as the men are. And what turns me on is a woman that has an inquisitive mind. In fact, I was just speaking to a male friend of mine where we had this deep dive discussion on death today and we had a deep dive discussion on duality and irony. And we were going down all these rabbit holes, talking about irony and duality and death. And we talked for almost an hour. I was walking the beach and he was doing the same. And we were just having these in depth. And it was a male friend of mine. That's what I want in a life partner is a woman who can go deeper than the surface. And yet sadly, most human beings talk at a surface level. In fact, I find most women talk at me and not with me. I repeat that they talk at me and not with me. And I believe because most women are guarded, bitter and jaded as they age in this dating process. And that's a judgment on my part, but that's what I keep witnessing over and over and over again. So what is my strength in relation? What I think I'm most confident is I'm gonna show up as at least vulnerable, authentic and transparent, more so than most men. And that is not feminine energy. That is empowered energy. Bum, bum, bum. And that's my answer to your question, Deep Diver. Thank you so much. All right. Kelly says, nope, that's all right. That was the Deep Diver one. Bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum, bum. I saw a question here, bear with me. Oh, Tim writes, what do your bracelets mean? The black one looks like... Okay, so folks, here's my bracelets. The first one is the Chakra Stones, but I call them the Infinity Stones because I'm a big Marvel comics fan. The next one says, if you can see, it says, here. Let me, I'm gonna show on Instagram first. And here it says, I'm enough. And the blue bracelet says Connor. Connor, 1999, 2018. It says, Connor rests with love. Now, the blue bracelet was a gift. So I wanna tell you the quick story on the blue bracelet. So about two, no, about three weeks after Connor passed away, I hear the knock on my door and there's a package on the ground. And I open it up and it's a box of a hundred of these blue bracelets. And there's no name or address from it. It's just a hundred of these blue bracelets. So I started to wear one. I gave a couple to my son and my ex-wife and I started to give it to friends. And then I posted a picture about a month or so after Connor passed away with these bracelets on. And on Facebook is where I posted it. And I saw a message that said, oh, great, you got them. And I'm like, oh my God, Carolyn, you're the one who sent them. She was so sweet. This is someone I met at the Hoffman process, the Hoffman process. This is a book I talk about frequently. If you're not familiar with the book, the Hoffman process, I highly recommend it. I did this live, an eight day event. And she was one of the sweet women that was at the Hoffman process and she purchased a hundred of those for me. I am down to my last 10. I've given away so many. So thanks 10 for that question. And those are my bracelets that I wear. The infinity stones, I'm enough and then Connor. All right, personal question says, what books and genres or movies do you enjoy? I am a big fan of sci-fi and I'm a big fan of anything that's Game of Thrones related. I'm a fan of The Witcher. I'm a fan of Game of Thrones. I'm currently watching Cursed. I'm a big fan of historical pieces of Marco Polo Versailles on Netflix or a couple of things. The tutors, I love the tutor. So I like anything historical and I love anything sci-fi, just binge watch Altered Carbon, anything sci-fi I love. And certainly I'm a Marvel action figure, a Marvel fan as well. So those are my top. Oh, and of course the notebook, Serendipity and Princess Bride. Oh, and then there's Shawshank Redemption. These are just some of my favorite movies. So thank you so much for asking. All right, Todd says, keep up the good work, big brother. Signing off date night. Hey Todd, have a great date tonight. Thank you so much. I wish you luck tonight. All right, Patriot Lady says, you're so honest, love the cares acronym. Love asking what does commitment look like to you and how will you know if you're ready? Great questions I recommend asking. And again, if you need some love and support, check out the link to a free discovery call with me to see if working with a coach is right for you. We're just gonna keep going. Cause I have no, look at it's Friday night and I have no plans tonight. My best bud is at the Hollywood Bowl with his girlfriend and his children. So I'm solo tonight. I'll probably go to the beach a little bit later. All right, let's see. Trendsetter says, I wear some of the same chakra stone braces. Do you remember the significance of the stones? No, I do not. But I'm sure they're out there, the chakra stones. All right, deep diver writes question. How do you handle a great mental connection with a man who doesn't want marriage? We click on all three levels, but he isn't in the marriage. He keeps coming back to me because of connection. So great connection is one thing. Being in a relationship is another thing. I'm a big proponent, folks. If you want to be in romantic relationship with someone and you want to have regular sex with them and you want to have companionship, connection and sex, then read the book eight dates to determine if you want a fully committed relationship with someone. That to me is what is, unless you want casual, then seek casual. If you want fully committed, then express yourself. That's what you want and only choose people who want the same thing. That's my invitation for you. So great question. All right, this will be my last personal question. Weegeans has personal question. How do you turn off the fear of being judged in public or criticism with the passion of your work? Whoa, so that's a great question because folks, I do have a fear. I have a fear that God forbid I say one little thing that will disrupt the balance of the universe and get me canceled because I just talked about vaccines. Oh my God, there's the Vaxxers and the anti-Vaxxers and the Democrats and the Republicans and this and that. Listen, I struggle with it at times because in some ways I struggle on a lot of different levels because I'm under a microscope and believe me, this is a challenge for me, especially for a person who's dyslexic like myself who oftentimes says one, when it's thinking one thing and his mouth says another thing. You know what? Forgiveness, forgiveness, forgiveness. Forgiveness means simply forgiving love. Forgiving love, I say to myself frequently, I love you, I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you. I love you, I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you. I love you, I'm sorry, please forgive me, thank you. For those who know this, it's called the Hawaiian forgiveness prayer also known as the hapono, pono, pono, pono. And I say it to myself every morning when I wake up and every night I go to bed and regularly throughout the day as a way to give myself an injection of love and that's my only way to navigate, oftentimes sticking my foot in my mouth which I do on a regular basis. And I think that'd be a great place to end for today. So folks, I wanna thank you so much from the bottom of my heart for allowing me to enter your life for a few, for an hour or so and share this content, just as a reminder, he's moving slow, the five things to demonstrate he's into you. Number one, he clearly expresses he seeks an exclusive relationship with you. Number two, you rarely ever go 48 hours without hearing from him. Number three, if your schedules are a little off he makes time for you at your convenience. He genuinely appreciates talking with you, he enjoys being with you, he feels good being with you. And lastly, he includes you in his outside life, his work, his hobbies, his kids and his friends. That's how you know a guy's into you even if he's going a little bit slow. I hope you found value in this content and if you did, please hit that like button. Please share this with your friends. Send this link to 10 friends. And if you all did that, you'll help me get to 100,000 subscribers. Please purchase a super sticker, super chat. If you felt there was value in this, that would show me that you care. And again, those proceeds go to a scholarship fund in the name of Connor. And I'm gonna sign off this video as I always do. First off, giving myself a big, gigantic hug of self love, hug of self love, gigantic bear hug of self love. I'm gonna reach into the camera and give you a hug of love if that's okay. I'm gonna ask you to turn to someone, a pet, a teddy bear pillow and give it or them a hug of love because hugs are a great source of love. And let's face it, we could all use more love in our lives. Thanks a bunch. Bye-bye now, bye-bye, bye-bye.