 All right, thanks for staying with us now according to mental health First aid to be able to take care of those around you. You need to first of all take care of yourself and It's it's like the advice that we're given when we go on airplanes when they say that you have to put on your own oxygen Mask before trying to help someone else with theirs It's important to protect your mental health and well-being every day so that you can handle daily stress and be effective Helping others when they need you now protecting your mental health will also help you take care of your physical health, right? and of course those are It also recognizes emotional and spiritual needs it fosters Fosters and sustained strong relationship and achieve balance in Different areas of your life. So how do we start? Right to take conscious efforts on safeguarding our mental health and ultimately and we're asking the men and the women around us, right? We want to ask our men especially How do you think it's important? I mean how do you begin to take mental health a lot more seriously? All right, so before we even go into this conversation, right? I want us I wanted us to give a bit of context to my mental health of course because they say that some of the causes of mental health Challenges or issues that we have or the mental health breakdown that we see right now I mean according to WHO as well the health organization some of the causes are Social and economic inequalities Protected conflicts violence public health emergencies, you know, which affects the whole population threatening the progress towards improved well-being right generally and of course These are just a few to mention that are the reasons why people just go into what's it called that state of Depression or whatever it is that has to do with mental health challenges. I mean again some people it's very difficult for them to handle loss Right people die around you or people For instance lose their jobs and all of that You are just not in that's mental frame to accept You know any kind of loss if it's beat loss of life loss of revenue loss of friendship You know it just occurred to me that even these people that are jack buying and going and all of that You're leaving some people behind, you know what I like it or not it's gonna affect Their mental well-being because sometimes, you know, you just believe okay There's somebody there for me and all of a sudden that person just disappears Now you're starting all over again. You're just hollow. You're just there by yourself, right? So I mean those are like, you know, let me just put I mean I was just trying to put a context to it I'm thankfully this year the theme for mental health day is well-being for all a global Priority so it's not just a particular gender is everybody child adult or generation Thank you everybody child adults young people old people whatever it is It is priority for everyone, right? So but I just want to hear your thoughts first of all Let me hear a little thought because I saw that you put out a post on social media about mental health You gave us about five tips, you know to look out for your mental health You are a strong advocate for mental wellness and mental health. Maybe let me start with you first of all I'm so Accept my condolences for your loss, right? I mean you are in the middle of something right now and I can imagine how this is also affecting you You know emotionally, but let me hear your thoughts a little on mental health. Why it's important that we must safeguard our health mentally Hi everyone We we we actually do not throw a lot of lights to mental health as much as we should Because the tiniest of things can actually trigger you that can you know start at the cost of your day And I mean it can be as little as you know Just remembering somebody that passed on or just you know, maybe Food that tasted the way maybe somebody passed on is really like you can treat anything can trigger your mental health But it's really important to be aware and also to realize that these things are really is really normal for you Just feel overwhelmed is really normal for you to feel sad But don't just keep quiet or let it go for instance a friend of mine passed a few weeks ago And today is a candlelight procession, you know We are all young a lot of young people are here You know crying and you know saying a lot of things and trust me her family as well is actually really sad because she died at 26 So it's it's really not something that anybody wishes for however We all need to just be aware of the Delicacy of how your mental health should be taking you taking care of because any People they can really treat us and all we have to do is be aware of everything that happens that we can manage it You know, that's basically how stuff we can always seek help you know You know talk to people that you trust about whatever it is because anything can trigger your mental health to bring down I have a friend of mine that almost committed suicide a couple of weeks ago all because she was feeling overwhelmed with life and you know for some people they might think oh You know however, she doesn't see that way. She just feels like the world is too stressful and she can't deal Everybody just have their mental week and capacity and sometimes it's just always good to open up and speak up and just sit right up if you need it Alright, okay. Let me hear your thoughts Mary because some have argued you are you belong to another generation at least not from my own generation And some have argued that it seems that we are breathing Very very weak people right now because any little thing you just oh you're affecting my mental health Oh, yeah, like you know, you know, like is it that there is no That doggedness that tenacity anymore. It seems like every little thing you just touch right now It's really for Gen Z. You know, they just go overboard with this mental health. No, no, no You're affecting my mental health. I can't take this. I can't do this They just abandon everything and all of that. It doesn't seem like The the building that toughness that resilience and all of that but let me hear your thoughts, you know with mental health, right? And I hope I'm not affecting your mental health It's such a funny topic because I've had so many arguments with so many people on this But to be honest, I can't even lie. I feel like my generation has Might have done it a bit too far, you know, because when I hear some cases from What employers are actually facing from employees and like however, this is totally unrealistic Somebody starts a job for one week and they're like, you know what my mental health. So It's it's a tough one, but it's very important It's very important because I feel like the previous Generation far back has just sucked in a lot of things It goes as far back as you know, just look at growing up and you see a child crying I don't know if it's a Nigerian thing or but we're just more used to beating the child You know rather than Noturing the child you you know when those days when we go and play our hair in all this small show You see a child just crying crying crying and and these are early stages where you need to nurture the child where They need that attention. They need that love. They need that care. You can be you can be strong And emotional you don't have to be tough where you Totally block out your emotions. God gave us emotions for a purpose. So why does everything have to be so Ruggedy ah Why why you cried? Why should you cry? Do you understand for a for a man the reason why men can't speak up now is because From an early stage they've been told. Why would you be crying? Why don't you know you're a man, you know stand up for yourself You know, you can't talk about even when they're depressed even when they're facing Everybody can make anybody can make mistake. Do you understand anybody can lose someone? We all have different ways of dealing with things and that is what mental health is all my generation now is trying to speak up is Look, we have traumas that we've all been dealing with And it's high time the earlier you figure out these traumas the earlier you're able to heal from it The better for you. You see some people they just react Something just happen and they're just shouting and you just think is this person mad the person is not mad He has just become used to Expressing himself that way or we go on the road and I remember I always tell my mom why are you shouting? Why you don't need to shout to communicate your points But me in my heart of heart, I know that there are some moments where you actually need to be mad because I mean It's Lagos. Are you going to talk to an Agra like oh, hi, so Are you okay, do you understand so but mental health is really really important because you see Actually in the workforce a lot of people are just They're not living their lives. They're just moving. They're like walking cogs. Do you understand and it's not Nobody's even saying Your job has to be The best Everybody at some point even the rich ones that you know, you know, everybody would face challenges Do you understand? But how are you able to handle your challenge? Do you run away from your challenges or Are you are you healthy enough to face your challenge to understand that? Okay, this is a tough time. I'm going through, you know, maybe I should take a step back one step at a time You know, are you and how is also the organization even helping to create Or they're just putting pressure pressure pressure pressure on you me in my office They used to tell me that uh, I'm the soft life girl. I don't like trouble and I told them I said well When is necessary? I put myself on on fit to run But I'm not a running cop when I left here. See there. I put my phone on do not disturb Even when people have to walk up to messages this morning. Oh, I've been trying to reach your phone switched off The next day will continue the conversation again. I won't die I just cause if I I look at it If I'm empty, what am I going to give to you? Absolutely. I can't give anything to you. Absolutely Ah, it's a very interesting topic very very important It's very very interesting I get all the angles that you're talking about and it's the care and again because we want to just piggyback a bit to why men You know, it is important for us to start to have healthy men because if you go again on social media You go online you go a lot you see a lot of things happening So when you see a man doing excessive drinking excessive womanizing Those things are also things. Yes. They're like suppressants They're trying to distract their minds away from something So when you see that there's a big problem, right? If we trace it back There is something that has been suppressed that somebody's just trying to express and at the end of the day They now go overboard with that expression But let me come to you right because again mental health is not something that we We can we we can't exhaust because we can't even stop. We can't exhaust the conversation but hey, let's talk walk environment, right because I I mean Maybe raise the very important point right walk environment toxic environment I mean like there are some places that I just don't want to be there because It's always every time I go there. You feel the energy. You feel the negativity just brewing around and People are having to endure this all the time and because of the economic state of the situation You really can't even say, you know what take your job. I'm not doing again and I walk away But how do we begin to handle some of these stresses that come around because we cannot avoid some There are some I can just put my phone on do not disturb and I will be fine But there are some you cannot run away from so how do we begin to work ourselves out, you know, um, let me hear your thoughts allero Yeah, I mean, um, I was actually going to quick. Let me quickly say something about the men's mental health Before I speak on that So one thing I wanted to just say that you know for men I feel like the pressure on them is a lot Because you know traditionally they are the provider So a lot of times when you see here that a man is committing suicide or is in acute depression Most of the time it's actually because of the pressure of providing or one thing or the other and because they are not able to It feels it's like it's their Responsibility to do something So when they are not able to do that thing first of all, they don't even communicate because they feel like they should be the One hand doing it. So a lot of them go into some type of deep depression that a lot of them A lot of times their wife or their girlfriend or their siblings or family members are not even aware of that Like she said walking cops. They're just walking and doing whatever but deep down inside. They are struggling So a lot of time it's speaking of that usually helps and you know speaking towards um You know mental health at workplace I have personally experienced with a couple of times, you know, sometimes when you feel burnt out You feel like you've done a lot but it's not it doesn't seem like it's working in some situations You might be in a toxic workplace whereby, you know, there's so many negative things going on However, you have to be able to you know, because a lot of times some people finding has to separate work from personal life Which you have to try to do it because some people they just come to the office They do what they can and they go home. So a lot of people will move their Their personality from their work So if you find yourself in that kind of environment that your work is actually toxic and it's not enabling you to sleep well Or it's not even allowing you to do like your day-to-day activities Personally, I would advise you take a break Or if there is for instance where the organization, sorry the organization I used to work at before moved They had um An employee with no system program whereby all the staff in the organization have access to Therapists and mental health institutions that they can always release their issues with The bottom line is no matter where you say it's either work or you know Within your personal space or within your you know, your network Anywhere you are there's always something that could trigger your mental health You can have a very nasty boss You can even have a very insensitive friend or a very insensitive family member However, you as an individual you have to learn It's hard, but you have to learn to consciously You know put things in place to if it's possible to remove yourself from something that will cost your mental health and your life Please do and I think that's the reason why a lot of Gen Zs are quick to run away when something happens and they're like Ah, no by mental health Because sometimes we we that we are the older generations we can just you know be Resilient and so you know what for this next couple of weeks? I'm not going to smile at work because honestly people recently kind of happens to me That I was feeling overwhelmed at work. I mean sometimes work For most of the time now what takes a lot of my time that I'm not able to do other things Sometimes you're like this work set is really giving me a big headache. Should I run away? Or you can't run away because first of all you have responsibility Secondly, you have you know people that are looking up to you then thought yeah You're gonna run away from every battle life on its own with a battle But we have to learn self-awareness to be able to say, okay You know what? Observe your mood observe the attitude around you if somebody's saying something to trigger you It's okay for you to take a take a walk It's okay for you to put your phone and do not disturb. They did not be them by phone for you Not be them by deeper for you. So you are responsible for yourself It's true now if somebody should say oh, I was trying to call you yesterday If you are calling my phone and you are giving me anxiety I will turn off my phone at that point and I will come back to you when I can Because there are a lot of people that they are driving home and they get a half attack They are driving home and they just slumped why because they are pressured and thinking about you A lot of things some people anxiety is another thing that could even kill you because you are scared You're worried of the next step, but I feel like You can't avoid it At the workplace at your business of business I won't have there's even a family member that there's a lady that is even a family that is coughing anxiety And sometimes you'll be like, can we even choose our family because right now this particular person Wants me there Yeah, it's that bad that we have brothers actually want her there, but what we should do? Just remove herself from that environment. So sometimes you are your own savior Because like people say you were born alone and you would die alone So whatever decision you need to make to help your life become better. You have to take it. All right, let's go Let's go to a very short break right when we come back from the break we'll continue the conversation because I actually want to also Address the issues around stigma and discrimination because I I believe that it is that stigma That make a lot of men shy away from issues around them mental health. Stay with us. We'll be right back All right, thanks for staying with us now if you just tuned in we're discussing the topic safeguarding our mental health, right We just want to safeguard our mental health and please let's hear what you have to say Remember you can join the conversation send us an sms or whatsapp to the rate one 803-4663 If you're a man and probably you've been through Mental health issues and you really just want to tell us, you know, how you got out of it Or if you're still in it, please feel free to share your message with us Also, you can tweet at us at we show Africa one on the hashtag we show Mary you said you want you wanted to inform us for this topic. Trust me even one we cannot even exhaust the topic But hey, let's discuss stigma and discrimination, right because again a lot of people When they when they hear that you are going through and that's why I'm a bit careful when I see someone going through mental health Challenges, but again, sometimes it's a bit confusing right because again, it seems like When you try to walk that person out of the The process it seems like you are also maybe like I don't know You become you become like you're walking around like on excels around the person because I don't want that to be I want to be able to still tell you the truth and still tell you that okay Yes, whilst if guarding your mental health, but it's that one is another story for another day But let's understand the issues of stigma. Why do we have stigma around it? Is it that it's so much of a big deal that I'll say, you know, I'm going through a lot of emotions We're just as a society in general We've been used to suppressing Things we've been used to not speaking up I mean look at marriages in our parents generation and look at marriages now A lady marries day and almost the guy is messing up women are empowered now You know, so it's like everybody can call the bluff in those days Can the woman talk? Even the children say oh daddy has come back from everybody runs inside But now You have your five-year-old son who's chatting you my friend put up a post and he said oh the sun rose old dad I need help in my homework. He to responded. I'm in a meeting. I'll call you after the meeting We've grown, you know, there's a lot of self-awareness now it all boils down to self-awareness I for one I understand the correction part. I'm really not good at correction You know, I'm a I'm a very figured out yourself kind of person And life has taught me if somebody tells me and I don't listen Subconsciously in my head. I know that one way or the other I will figure it out So I feel like the stigma around it basically is just that We are used to suppressing Pain we're used to suppressing these triggers I had my own fair share and when I was talking about it with my mom She kept asking why are you looking at the negative? What are you looking at and I said I'm not I'm not bringing it up to spite you I'm not trying to tell you you didn't do a good job as a mother I'm just only expressing how it affected me because it is still affecting me and I want to change So I have to bring it you have to go through the fire before you come out And a lot of people are not ready for that. Let's be honest about it A lot of us are not ready for that. A lot of companies are not ready to face the reality of hey This is a toxic environment It's all about profit-driven profit-driven. You know, we have to make the profit and if you die, okay There's this young lady now who Allera is at her. How is she? She's 26 It's shocking You can pass out at any age. We shouldn't wait for death to tell us that hey This life we have is not our own and it can go at any point in time It shouldn't get to that stage before you say you're going to therapy They're looking at you as I was wrong with you. It shouldn't be Because a lot of people need therapy Absolutely It shouldn't be something where you can you know people don't want to speak up about it It's almost like if I say it now You say I've come with the mental health card if I talk now I will say Why are you playing that card? But it's affecting you you are dying whether you like it or not. You're not living a fulfilled life You don't have to be a bologna to live a fulfilled life and mental health is not just about oh, okay I just want to play the card so I can you know go and chill and lay on a yard or something and come back It's not really about that. It's a very very important thing is your well-being How you relate to people as well it matters so much You go to the club and a lot of people are just drinking away their sorrows Sure And they wake up the next morning and they're still as depressed even the word depression safe Saying it outside is like a what's that? Don't say that. Don't say that They're covered in the blood of Jesus And let's just face it people are depressed someone has a miscarriage and Doesn't know how to handle what she's going through But you want her to still be strong and come out like everything is okay. It's not okay I always say to people it is okay. Not to be okay. You understand Don't form toughness if I have to cry me are we crying look I have you do understand I used to be very emotional I am still very emotional and I'm very expressive with my social media So what I had to do is you know what you also have to understand that not everybody Is going to be able to take what you're putting out the right way I was very expressive in terms that I could be at work And if I have a breakdown it's so funny Well, I would actually record myself crying and my friends my older friends are like, why would you do that? Mary, I'm messing up. What would you see make someone see your tears? Never don't do that I need to me. I'm just thinking What what is wrong? I'm just crying everybody cries as well You know, but I understand the society perspective, you know, you have to come out You shouldn't let people see your weakness, you know, even in the laws of power, you know You shouldn't actually allow people to see your weakness but there's Human side of it. It is okay to be vulnerable Let me let me hear a lera It's okay. It is very okay And it's okay to go to therapy. There's nothing wrong with it. There's nothing wrong with it. Absolutely nothing Are you sorry like I really wish I was at the studio today because in my head is what am I supposed to do with this emotion? I have you're telling me not to express it. What am I supposed to do with it? I feel overwhelmed. I'm feeling hopeless. I'm feeling like things are not Working and you're telling me to bottle it off. How? Because it is the process of bottling it off that that makes it explode In fact implodes and you don't want something implodes It's horrible that people say that let nobody see your tears. It shows that you're strong. What are you being strong for? who What are you pretending for because if you don't use the strength is you don't need it and you're not going strong So why would I act it? because a lot of times I Don't have like I mean I was I was going to tell the story of you know that there are two there are different types of mental health That some some people they are physically healthy But their mental health is something that you know they have issues with so imagine when you are both Physically unhealthy and that you are also mentally unhealthy. It's like the worst of it all And stigmatization is actually something that people makes it worse I remember when I used to work at an e-commerce company There was a lady that she didn't know her diagnosis. She was always fainting During meetings, she the girl can just pass out. We are talking about something the girl will just pass out Sometimes she can be talking to you and the next thing she has painted in the office people stigmatize that it was a problem Because she didn't know what was wrong with her But it was affecting her mental health because every other person was like oh my this girl is crazy You are this you know, she couldn't even express herself all the time because of this By the end of the day when she was able to find the solution She mentioned that her mental health affected her more than her physical health because of the stigma of everybody looking and saying Oh, what is wrong with this person? So a lot of times we are not able to control it But the truth of the matter like I keep saying is that you have to be aware of yourself And you have to you have to put yourself first. It's not about you It's about me So if I am actually gonna that's why most people don't even like to express that they are feeling is a certain type of way In the workplace, you're giving your subordinates Well, let me go use bosses for example a boss that is always, you know That is always with all of a sudden starts to act like a terrible human being If you really dig deep this person is basically using you as his shield Because he or she is probably going through their own You know personal trauma that they feel like the best way to defend themselves or to to mask it or to guide it Is by you know, you know, authorizing somebody else or being toxic So most of the time you have to also be, you know, considerate of other people That's what they say nobody knows best because the person that is able to stigmatize you has no idea So a lot of times they need education And I'm happy you took us there because I remember I remember when I was going through some issues with Myself I mean my oldest sister always she's the one that was it come on tough enough, you know You see in fact the birth of my child, right? My first child when I was having the when I was having the child when they had given me the They had induced me. So the thing was so painful. I kept on crying She said can't you tough enough any small pain you just be crying because she's the kind of person that She can stomach pain like that. I don't have tolerance for pain. She was now like, you know, tough enough tough enough I said this thing is painful. So I was so I was so pained that the time she was having her first child I was not around but guess what in the delivery room. She kept on calling that they should please call me She's apologizing to me that she didn't know that this is the pain I went through But that is an aside. So the same thing when I was going through an emotional roller coaster a period I was going through that She actually said who are tough enough? Can't you just, you know, come snap out of it and all of that? She couldn't understand but I think what I now did was to help Now she's a lot more sensitive. She's a lot more understanding, you know But you see again, it took patience for me to be able to explain to her that this is how I'm feeling So when you see me cry, just let me cry, right? Don't don't act like because you can handle it then I should be able to handle it, right? Even if what siblings were this is from the same womb It does not mean that how I can handle my own threshold for pain is the same threshold for pain So now she's a lot more sensitive. She'll say I make her not talking anything I may for you To say I did affect your mental health and all of that But she's not seeing it that now being a lot more Empathetic has even built the relationship better, right? So now we discuss things, you know She's not because she said no, no, I'm very blunt. I'm very in blood all that bluntness now She has calmed down. She has toned down to understand that there are some things that you have to empathetically follow up on Right, not just say you want to just say it as it is and just blot it out I'm somebody that if I'm in a very deep emotional pain My my quickest way to express is to cry. So I'm you know, I mean there was a day I can never forget that day My friends took me out to the beach I cried literally from like 9 a.m to 5 p.m The tears was just flowing, but I was just standing there. I wasn't talking But I just and guess what by the time I was done crying that was the end Of the pain and everything. So there are different coping mechanisms that people have I just need people around when you see somebody going through some form of deep pain Don't don't um trivialize it. Don't push it aside and say no is nothing, right? We're discussing Mental health today people are saying what are they discussing? Do you understand? It is Part like I can comfortably say that 80 percent of the problems that we are facing today Or even 95 percent of the problems that we're facing today if you trace it back It has a link to the yes to the mental health mental state of that person You see a man taking out Cain or a woman bringing our knife to stab a man You see all the sorts of things that happen all the vices that are happening a man cheating even on his wife Or a woman cheating on a husband everything can be traced to the fact that these people are not emotionally stable So imagine if we start to pay attention to the emotions of people because you know because Pain emotional pain is not something you can see You can so if I had a cut here in my hand now it is okay for you to be empathetic I was oh, sorry. You sympathize with me. But if I didn't have any single pain I was looking all glammed up and everything you can't see the pain that I have on my inside So it's difficult for you to say, you know what I understand what you're going through So that's why emotional pain and that is the biggest pain that controls the overall well-being of the human being Right, but we don't pay attention to these things because we think that it's not physical We can't see it and yet we just trivialize it. So I just feel like everybody around Try to pay a little more attention on the people around you You know study their emotions study their mood, you know When you need to be quiet around them be quiet when you need to speak speak and speak with love And understand it. Yeah, you wanted to say something quickly I think another thing that really helps me is self-awareness self-awareness in term in terms of Because I've dealt with my pain, you know, either I found help via Through my meditation through my youtube videos since I'm a I know it myself I don't want you to help me. I already know that you can't help me because from what you're saying So it's fine. I'm like, it's me and my god. We're gonna figure this out And what's really helped me is self-awareness, you know getting to know myself And now I pulled I told my colleague yesterday and I said, oh Yes, I can forget it and begin to talk too much talk too much in terms of and begin to Over talk over express myself. You need to know who and who you're talking to I have people who I'm very comfortable with I mean comfortable to say I can say anything about how I feel and they're not gonna judge me So I now pinch myself to say, hey, you're stepping outside of that boundary And don't be surprised if you start getting this same feedback, you know that you used to get before Yes, you don't want to get it. So keep to yourself Is you that has your problem? You know solve it if you need to go to therapy go to therapy, you know, but know yourself self-awareness Really, really help. I want to absolutely let me bring a little because you you mentioned five steps physical activity as exercising learning a new skill collect connecting with other people Practicing kindness. I like that part practicing kindness And being mindful like you're saying in the present, right? You know, how do these things really help your mental state? Then we can then take comments and wrap up Yeah, I mean most of these things is the consciousness that helps you like she mentioned being aware of yourself Being able to understand your trigger being able to understand what what's the thing that makes me unhappy What's that thing that that brings me into that deep thought of Of sadness or that makes you mentally unstable if you're able to identify, you know, that's particular trigger It helps you being physically active is actually something that you know, I feel like it's like a drug The moment you start to exercise you definitely feel way better and way stronger than when you started, you know I wanted to quickly say something Most of the time the best way to stop stigma, right is actually for you to first of all go and get help Go to a therapist go to an organization that actually have Professionals that would speak to you professional psychotherapists that would really speak to you Then they would actually invite your loved one To your sessions is a composed written that happens to everybody so far as you're actually going for therapy The therapist will invite your loved ones and that's how they Easily and socially break it down for them to understand because a lot of times when you are going through your mental issues You need at least one person you trust that you can have these conversations with Yeah, like a support system and because because of how delicate some of these Conversations can be you can't have it with everybody. But the first step is go get help In your process of getting help It is important and compulsory that the psychotherapists invite at least one person that is that means some Much to you to be involved in your recovery process Because it's not one day. It's not one year. It's not even five years Continuous awareness practice that would help you become stronger and better Thank you. All right, so let's take comments From our viewers Okay Good evening ladies interesting topic my mental health my mental health was tampered with during covid When my husband was really sick. I faced a lot of issues from close family members who were waiting for what to grab Thank god I had few friends that were with me. I had access to materials at work that helps me I was going for workouts every day and then listened to some messages that helped me after that I expressed my mind and told All what they did and now placed everyone where they ought to be So happy in my space now and have so much peace. You need to take charge of your life It wasn't easy, but you'll be fine if you are open to trusted Few and seek help when needed. Thanks bc. Thank you so much bc. I'm allero. You have a comment I mean, um, I would just say that Everybody should okay, sorry Okay, so mental breakdown Oh, did we lose allero? Okay, let me take my comments Um, good evening my dear beautiful sisters of what are you saying hashtag ways safeguarding our mental health We need to accept our mental status whether good or bad When we discover that we are not sound mentally it is advisable to go For serious therapy to solve the problem on ground if not the problem will persist Thank you so much. It says sister. What said it all it is okay not to be okay She gave an example that when you are in pain emotionally you should show it We are all humans sister. Well, I love your dress. It's like you want to fly My name is daniel illo. Yes. I want to fly. Allerah. Are you back? Okay, if allerah is not back, let me take her comment says mental breakdown is real the amount of people with mental issues are unbelievably high But there is poor diagnosis and Documentation i'm a doctor and I have seen a lot greetings to mary oma. We love you All right, I was just going to say on a light note genesis. I take god be good now You people are also affecting our mental head any smut you're affecting my mental you you said you're affecting my mental head Because now we don't even know what to what to do. I mean, I mean the world is changing so fast Right and you don't even know what you would say that would offend You know someone I just want us to be a lot more understanding, right? We'll keep talking about mental health because it's not something that we we we can stop talking about Because this is actually real But I just want to say that I mean if we all came together With some much love empathy on us understanding We would definitely rise above this because it is really Eating deep into some of the behaviors that we're seeing and all and you know People are now expressing it in violent manners and all of that It's a result of how bad we have degenerated emotionally. Well, mary had a final comment um, I just want to say Let's try to be mindful mindful a little exercise you can do is just take a minute and be conscious of your breath um You can feel your heart beating Just take a second and just be aware of that Bring yourself back to it to to where you are at the moment, you know And that would really help you at every point in time Keep figuring out yourself understand your triggers Move away when you need to move away come out when you need to come out Guess what man is your life? Absolutely is your life when you're in control. Absolutely. Thank you so much. Thank you allero Ah, we had to drag her out But thank you, mary. I think we had a fantastic conversation Now, please um before we go do ensure you follow us everywhere at wish your africa tiktok instagram youtube Facebook twitter at wish your africa You can drop a comment more importantly follow all our engagements on social media Like share invite your families and friends to watch and follow the conversation now if you missed today's quote here it is again Um, I believe the biggest stigma right now with mental health is that a lot of men are not talking about it I mean, so we are hoping that we have more men come out to talk about it as we then have women You know love and support, you know their spouses and thank you to everyone that shared their comments You know with us. We'll see you guys tomorrow at 8 p.m. Or so bring another great conversation to your screen. Enjoy