 Simon & Schuster Audio presents Remy by Katie Evans read by Sebastian York Present, Seattle There will be hundreds of days in my life that I won't remember but this is one day that I will never forget Today I marry my wife Brooke, little firecracker, Dumas I promised her a church wedding and a church wedding is what she'll get I swear if you frown any harder at the door, it's going to collapse under your stare My PA, Pete, calls from the couch I swing around to where he and Riley have been watching me pace around the living room of Brooke's old Seattle apartment Apparently those two are amused as fuck by me Dipshits I don't see what's so amusing Turning back to the bedroom door, I continue pacing For the life of me, I can't imagine what's taking her so long It's been exactly 58 minutes since she locked herself up in our bedroom to get ready When Brooke, my fucking Brooke, usually gets dressed in five Dude, it's her wedding day, chicks take a lot of time to get prepped Riley thrusts his arms out in the air in a gesture that implies that's life Like you're an expert now, Pete jabs It's the dress, Melanie, Brooke's best friend says, exploding out of the master bedroom with the trail of white stuff that looks like a veil It has all these buttons, and what are you three doing here anyway? Remington, I talked to Brooke about it You guys should leave and we'll meet you at the altar That's fucking ridiculous, I say, laughing But when Melanie keeps staring at the three of us, and especially me With an expression someone might use on a couple of dogs they want to scat I scowl and head to the bedroom door I curl my fingers around the door knob and speak through the closure slit Brooke? Remy, please don't come in here Come to the door then When I hear shuffling, I press closer to the edge and drop my voice So the dipshits on the living room couch don't hear Why the fuck can't I see you right now, baby? All this entering and exiting the room by Melanie, with me separating Sample complete Ready to continue?