 James Swannick here, and today we're talking to 62-year-old real estate investor Joe Brennan from Long Island, New York, who is 96 days alcohol-free today. Joe Brennan, welcome to the show and congratulations. Well, thank you, James. I appreciate that. If it wasn't for you, I wouldn't be here, so I really appreciate that. Thank you very much, and you're welcome as well. So tell us a little bit about yourself, Joe. So I have been married for 35 years to my wonderful wife, Mary. I have two sons, one who just got married last week. The other was married a few years ago, and I am a grandfather now to a little baby girl Parker. I am a real estate investor, and I also consult for another company, for a construction company, but we buy properties then in Florida, and I have one right now in Tallahassee, Florida, 158 units, and life is good. Life has been really good these last 96 days. Does that imply that life wasn't as good prior to the 96 days, Joe? Yes, it does. Well, listen, I have a wonderful life. I can't complain. I have a great family and children, but I was not where I should be. I was not as alert, as clear, as sharp, so this changed all that. It's amazing how much energy I have now. It's so much more energy. I remember, James, you and I had that first call that you talked to me, and we talked about the things I was missing or wasn't getting done, and all those things, the working hours at night, spending more time on the real estate and the investors, working on now, a coaching business that I want to get involved in. None of those things could I ever have gotten done because I was tired at night all the time from drinking, so it really has changed everything. The other thing is, I would get a little at times, a little rambunctious, and my wife really appreciates the fact that that doesn't happen anymore. I just feel great. The other thing is, you realize that it's something, and I think I've heard it so many times from so many people, it's such a commonplace thing to drink, and it's like, if you're not drinking, you're the oddball, but once you stop doing it, you realize how much smarter you are than everybody else. Now, I'm not a preacher, so I don't preach to people, and my wife still drinks, and we go out, and that's fine, but my brother who's said to me, Joe, I am just so goddamn impressed with you for what you're doing. It's just an amazing thing, and I know how he is. He's competitive with me, so I wouldn't be surprised. He started to say to me, I didn't have a drink. I decided I'm not going to drink for three hours, then I'm not going to drink, and I said, here it goes. He's starting to realize, he said, I held out all the way till 11 o'clock at the night of the wedding, so good for you. That's great. The other thing about this program, which I could talk all night, so I apologize, but the people I've met, speaking to people on MarcoColo, really gain friendships with other people through your program that really connects people. I think that's the best part of this thing, because you realize it's not just me. A lot of people have gone through what I went through. A lot of people are not being as productive as they should, and so just the amount of people I've learned, and the coaches you have, and the Victorians, have been phenomenal. To anybody who's out there who's thinking or concerned about where they are in their life, this program really changed everything for me. Thank you for sharing, Joe. I appreciate those kind words, and congratulations. It sounds like people like your brother are noticing the change in you, and without you actually pitching them on living an alcohol-free lifestyle, they're noticing your way of being, having shifted, and they want a piece of that action. Yes. Yeah. I think that's what it is. Everybody who I've said, anybody who's asked, and I said, oh, you know, 90 days, and they're like, what? 90 days? Are you kidding me? How did you do that? That's unbelievable. I'm like, well, it's not really. Once you start to realize how good you feel, it's like being on a diet, right? Once you start losing weight, you start seeing yourself, wow, I can keep doing this. And then with this, with all the positives that come out of this, which includes losing weight, of course, that's the other thing people are noticing. It's like, wow, Joe, you look great. My brother and his wife, the one who talked about it said, how much weight did you lose? How much weight did you lose? I said, I don't know, like, seven or eight times. No, you lost much more than that. I've never seen you look so good. So that also helps. That helps feed it all. But is it curious to you or how much people are impressed by you performing the simple act of not drinking? Like, is it interesting to you or is anything you discovered about as a culture, how we perceive alcohol based on these kind of, wow, that's incredible. Wow, amazing, 90 days responses that you've been getting from people. Yeah. I mean, it's a nice thing, but it's a sad thing as well, right? Because the grip of alcohol in the society is so, it's so amazingly invasive, that if you're, as I said before, if you're not drinking, you are the oddball. But I also think that people don't see other people stop drinking that often. So it's kind of like, like my brother, right? He probably wouldn't have ever thought of it. So the more of us, and the more James, of all your students that get out there, the more people start to say, you know, you're right, Joe. I don't feel so good sometimes waking up in the morning. And I don't, you know, like, so, because all we see is alcohol everywhere we look, right? I said to my son the other day, and he started laughing. I said, Kyle, is there any place or any event that you ever go to where there's not drinking involved? And he stopped for a second and he goes, no, I can't think of it. So it just permeates our whole society. And it's just very routine. And I have found that being that person in the beginning was a little tough. But now it's like, I don't know, it's like a sense of pride for me to be the person in the room that, by the way, as you well know, James, in going to events and stuff, you see a lot of funny stuff when you're the only one not drinking. At my son's wedding, though, like you said, people thought I was drinking because I was having a great time, an awesome time. And when I told people, no, I didn't drink, you didn't drink. No, I didn't. I just had a great time. So yeah, you mentioned your son's wedding. Is that right? Yes. Yes, we had my son's wedding last week. And where was that? So it was on Long Island in a beautiful place on Long Island. And we had an absolutely phenomenal band. And I was out on the dance floor all night. And having a big fun time, dancing some stuff with some of the young guys and stuff getting out there and doing it. And people thought I was drinking. But I wasn't. I had a great time, felt great the next morning. I was the first one up. I was out. And it was awesome. Awesome. Yeah. Yeah, I can totally relate to that. I've been out before events, weddings, parties. And the following morning, maybe people meeting up for a brunch or a lunch or something, and then nursing hangovers. And somehow the conversation comes up that, you know, I'm alcohol free or I don't drink. And they're just amazed. They'll say something along the lines of, you were drinking last night. I was like, no, it wasn't. But yeah, you were. You were like, yeah. I'm like, no, it really wasn't. Yeah. I remember being in, I was in Canberra, Australia. Canberra is the capital of Australia. I was there for a friend's wedding about four months ago. And beautiful wedding. A friend of mine who used to be a journalist married, a publicist for one of the Australian politicians. And it was a very kind of who's who of Australian politics at this wedding. And, you know, the party went late. It was open bar, of course. And I was drinking soda waters all night. And I was dancing. And I remember one couple asked me, hey, we're going to the bar. You want to drink? I said, yeah, yeah, grab me a soda water. Just soda water? I'm like, yeah, yeah, yeah, just soda water. It'd be great. Okay. So that went off. They got me soda water, brought it back. And they said, oh, you're not drinking? I'm like, nah, nah, I haven't drunk since 2010. Oh, did you have a problem? Did you have a problem? I'm like, no, not really. I was a societally acceptable drinker, you know, but I just realized that it was slowing me down. I put on a bit of weight. I was a bit tired and foggy and irritable. So I took a break to see what it would feel like. And I liked how it felt. So I kept going and it's been 11 and a half years. And then they were just amazed. They said, they're grilling me for the next 20 minutes. This kind of sweet Caroline was playing in the background and they were just grilling me on this. And wow, what's it like? Oh, it's amazing. Oh, you're drinking so prevalent, isn't it? Oh, I've always, I've often thought about cutting back or quitting back, but it's so hard, isn't it? Because everyone's, you know, everyone around you, very, very common conversation like this. And the following morning, my friend and his new bride set up a little marquee tent in a park, a very picturesque park in Canberra overlooking a lake and said, meet everyone, meet there from 10 until one. I think it was like that they call it coffee and croissants, I think it was. Well, I was up at seven 30. I went for a run. I'd done some journaling and then I kind of the shower and strolled over there at 10. And people were like, oh, we're like, oh, that was a great night. But oh, I'm feeling a bit rough today. Oh, how about you? And I said, oh, I'm okay. I went for a run this morning. You went for a run. What are you talking about? I'm like, yeah. How did you do that? Oh, I don't know. And then someone else said he doesn't drink. You don't drink. I was like, no, but you were drinking last night. But I saw you screaming Bon Jovi living on a prayer midnight 1230 on the dance floor sweating and everything. I'm like, yeah, but I wasn't drinking. Absolutely amazed and astounded. And so it's so prevalent in society, isn't it? This kind of horror and amazement that someone might be able to do something like that. It is. It is. And the only difference between you and I, James, is since maybe because I'm 62 and you were so young, I was aching my knees. My everything was aching from the dancing the night before my head felt great on my knees. Tell me, Joe, what was your drink or drink of choice? I only drank wine. I would drink Pinot Grigio. Okay. That was that. I never drank. I haven't drank hard liquor since I was a young kid. And I used to drink a little beer. I would drink beer. IPA is lately with my sons because they like the IPA. So if we go to a game or something like that, I would drink beer. But with my wife or when we're out to restaurants and stuff, I would drink Pinot Grigio. That's it. But I would have, we'd sit at home and we got in the habit, especially during COVID of drinking every night. And, you know, I'd have three, four without a problem. And then get up at 415 the next morning. Yeah. You're an early riser, certainly. So when were you, what time were you drinking the Pinot Grigio each night? I would drink it from say six o'clock to like 8.39. And then go to bed at 10. I'd go to bed at 10. Okay. So you drink it from six to eight, 39, three glasses, as you say, three glasses. At least three. Yeah. Usually three, sometimes four. And when it was three or sometimes four, were you buzzed or slightly drunk or were you just normal, neutral? And it was just, you know... You know, at home and drinking like that, I was more just tired. Maybe a little buzz, but not really that much. You know, like I was just tired. Yeah. And then when you slept and when you woke up, you said 415, you set an alarm for 415 or you just naturally wake up then? For the most part, I naturally wake up, but I always set an alarm. Okay. But yeah, for the most part, I do naturally wake up. But I will tell you and was, and I know I've heard this story many times since mine, but I remember saying to you, and this is what drove me to you, was waking up in the morning and saying, I'm not going to drink tonight because I was ashamed that I was drinking so much. And that's what I would get. I'd get up in the morning. You know what? Tonight, I'm not going to drink. And then I would drink. You know what? Tonight, I'm not going to drink because I don't feel good. I don't like this feeling. I don't like that feeling. And that's what that ultimately, I got to the point with that with some other health issues because my brother died of a heart attack and so I was getting my heart checked and things like that. I just finally got to the point where it was like, you know what? Enough. Enough. So. What was that feeling when you would wake up at 415? Like other than I'm not going to drink tonight, physically, what was driving you to say to yourself, I'm not going to drink tonight? I felt tired. Sometimes woke up with a headache. I'd take an extra strength, etc. in the morning. And also just thinking back, you know, saying, what are you doing? Like, why are you spending your nights? You could have gone to the gym, could have spent more time reading or doing the crossword puzzle, which I do tons of them now. You know, what are you doing? And I knew that Mary would stop. You know, my wife, she'd go down and watch TV. She'd have her two and that was it. And I'd keep drinking. So I, it was not, I did not like who I was. I also didn't like, I'm a very disciplined person. So I didn't like the fact that I couldn't stop when I wanted to stop. That bothered me. I gave up cookies for two years once and I'm junk food at it. I was only giving it up for 40 days and someone dared me. So it bothered me that I would say in the morning that I don't want to drink tonight and I would. That really bothered me because I'm like, what, what the hell is wrong with you? Like, stop. So. And what, what did you identify was quote unquote wrong with you? To me, it's, it's not normal to be drinking every night of the week. It's just not. I mean, I had some people say, oh, I have one drink and I, whatever, that's fine for you. But it's at that point to me, if you have a couple of drinks on the weekend, or you go out to dinner and you have a drink or two, that to me, that's what it should be. It shouldn't be that you, what happened, James was my whole day would revolve around drinking, right? Because I was thinking, okay, I'm going to drink tonight. You know, like, oh, I can't go here because I want to get home. I want to have my drinks, right? I can't go to the gym because if I do, then I can't drink. And then so it became this thing where it was spending way too much of my time focusing on it. And, you know, I'm just so happy that, you know, I had started looking you up a few weeks before. You know, just, I was looking up just stopping drinking or whatever. And then one morning I just woke up and said, all right, I'm calling him tonight. And I'm doing it. So. So you were just searching around on the internet, were you? Or did you see what I'm looking at? You know what, I don't, I think, I think, James, I think you asked me this one. I think it was on Facebook. But, you know, I don't remember. I did, I was definitely looking online, but I don't know if I saw you on Facebook, then went online as well. Or I don't remember, but I definitely did go online as well. Yeah, got it. And during the process, during the last 90, how long has it been? 96 days? During the last 96 days, you said that you noticed some changes in you. I mean, other people noticed changes in you. Obviously, you lost some weight, you look great, you mentioned you had more clarity and energy. Is there something in particular besides dancing with energy on the dance floor? Maybe work related, business related, where you've identified that being alcohol free has served you in a very positive manner over the past 96 days? Oh, absolutely. At my real estate business, I'm now spending what those hours that I used to spend it on, I get added to that. I'm probably spending an extra eight hours a week just doing more real estate stuff. I'm now in a coaching program to learn to be a life coach. So I'm spending like five or six hours a week on classes and studying and things like that. That time, I wasn't using it all. I found that all back. I also have this confidence, this inner confidence that I've always been a confident person to myself, but the confidence of knowing that I'm not doing that anymore, the confidence of knowing that I'm the clearest guy there, the confidence of knowing that if my wife wants to go to a restaurant that's an hour away, all right, let's go. I would never do that before because I had a drink. So I just have a confidence about me that permeates because I'm proud of what I've done. I feel great. And there's a real confidence there as well. Yeah, fantastic. And what has your wife shared with you about your experience? Oh, my wife loves it. She always felt that I couldn't, didn't know when to stop, which she always could. And she, we were just out to dinner and she was talking about, you know, sometimes she'd get into arguments with me and it was the alcohol. And I would say, well, I said, I'm not doing that anymore. She said, absolutely not. She said, it's such a pleasure now. So it's great. She loves it, absolutely loves it. Fantastic. What's your intention from here on, Joe? What's your intention around alcohol, your habits, those kind of stuff? Yeah, there were times during this where I said, oh, you know, when it's over, maybe I'll have a drink. You know, I don't, right now I don't feel of the need to do that. I'm not saying I will never have a drink again, but right now it's going really well. I'm enjoying what it is. Every once in a while I feel like having a drink, but it's like, you know what, so what? I never really got horribly difficult for me, but I did have temptation. You always have temptation. So recently after my 90, yesterday I had a problem that I have some sort of foot disease thing that they told me about that was totally shocking. But the interesting thing was I'm like, no, I'm not going to drink. I don't need to drink just because I got bad news on something that came in. And so I have a much more of a strong feeling on this. I will tell you this though, as I've said to you that I'm very competitive is I've always said to myself, well, I'm sure I can have one drink, but then I said to myself, yeah, but I don't want to break the string. Like I'm going so well here. I don't want to break it. I'm doing great. I'm at 96 days. How long am I going to get this to go? And by the way, I got to catch up to James. He's only nine years ahead of me, but nine and a half or 10. But so my intention right now is to not drink for the foreseeable future. Hmm. You said you're a competitive guy. Is that right? Or is it your brother who's a competitive guy? No, we're both. Yes, I come from a competitive family. Yes. And I am competitive. I see. So does that mean that someone throws down the gauntlet and says, yes, you're going to be alcohol free for the next etc. etc. Like put a figure in there that you will commit to that? Yes. Yeah. I told you, I gave up cookies for Lent, which is 40 days. And then people are saying, ah, you can't do it. And I ended up because I kept going, going, going off for two years. I didn't have cookies. Yeah, because I was like that. And that's what frustrated me about the drinking that I couldn't stop it. But now that I've stopped it, I'm like, okay. So have you, have you got a timeframe in your mind now? Or is it just day by day? Or is it? You know, I figured the summer, look, the summer's difficult, right? Summer's difficult. I have a beach house, you know, our, our routine always has been, you know, go down to the beach at four o'clock, three o'clock, open up the drinks at five, sit on the beach for a couple of hours, watch the sun go down and, you know, but plus there's also to beach parties, people having beers and stuff. But you know, that's fine. I'm not worried about it. I'd stay for the summer. Usually the other big thing is giant games, the football games, we have season tickets with my sons. And we usually do a little tailgating before with a few beers, nothing big, but I always enjoy that because it's with my sons and we pick the beers, the IPA's and stuff. But I'm not going to be doing that. I do pick some good. Yeah, I decided that I'm not going to do that. So it's at least through September, whatever, and we'll go from there. Yeah. So you'll still go to the games and still do the tailgating. Oh, I'll still do the tailgating. Absolutely. Yeah, I'll still do the things I do with my sons, but, but I just won't drink the beer. Yeah, exactly. Yeah, got it. Well, here's the thing. You don't have to drink the beer in order to enjoy the experience with your sons in order to enjoy the game, enjoy the Giants game. You don't need the drinks to dance like a crazy man on the dance floor at your son's wedding. You don't need the drinks to go to the work functions. Tell me a little bit about the work functions that you attend in real estate. Yeah, so we've had a few. I work, one of my bosses is an Irishman, a real Irishman over from Ireland and is a big drinker. And the guys we go out to lunch with tend to be big drinkers. So the last four or five, because we have another lot, I have not drank at all. And boy, can they pound them. Wow. And I would, in the past, I would be sitting there having three wines, whatever with them. But you know what, after no one says anything, like, it was fine. It was fine. I went to an event, an evening event, and it was a cocktail party. And I had my salsa and it was fine. It's like you said, at the end of the day, people don't really care. Although I will say this, my good friend said to Mary the other day, is Joe okay? Because more than anything, we had a really the last few nights, I went to bed late because we had a wedding that we went to on Friday night, another wedding Friday night. And then we watched my granddaughter on Saturday night, because my son and his wife went to a wedding. So two nights in a row, I got to bed after one o'clock. And I don't ever go to bed after 10 o'clock every single night, no matter what. So when I was at their house and they were all drinking and I was having soda, he was like, you're okay. I'm like, well, I'm just tired. I'm not used to being up two nights in a row like that. But that was it. The positives are so far outweigh any wanting to drink, the positive things that have happened to me that it's just not worth it right now. Hmm. Just finally, Joe, was there something that you discovered about yourself along the journey? You were inside of our 90 day program, Project 90, you met a whole host of other people. Was there something noteworthy or interesting that you discovered through that process? Well, I think, and I might have said this to you before. And I think when you and I had our first conversation, I said this to you, I truly believe in coaching. I think everything I've been successful in through my two real estate type businesses, just like coaching, I'm doing this. And I think what happens is when you're being coached and when there are other people involved, it just raises your whole game. I mean, I'm the type of person that I want to do well with other people. I want to make sure that I show up. I want to make sure that I'm doing my part. And I think your program brings so many people together, and you get to see so many different types of people, and you also are being held accountable. And I think that's the greatest thing about coaching is being held accountable. My wife and I just had this conversation at dinner, talking about how coaching is so valuable to me, because I remember my first real estate coaching thing I had homework to do every week. And I had to show up on that Wednesday. And if I would be mortified if I didn't do that homework to make sure, because I was being held accountable. And your program does that. You hold people accountable. And not only do you hold people accountable, though, you make it fun. Because it's not this serious, dour, dull, we have fun. People talk, the Marco Polo's are great. You really feel like you're having a good time while you're trying to stop drinking. So I really tip my hat to you, James, because this is a phenomenal program that you've put together. It really is. I can't, I would recommend it to everyone and anyone that I talked to who was ready to do it. Because I really think you've put together a great formula for allowing people to not only stop drinking, but enjoy the process and meet a lot of good people. Thank you so much, Joe. Appreciate that. And congratulations on your success so far. And it won't just be you who gets the benefit. It'll be your wife and your sons and construction company associates and other people in your real estate business. All these other people who come into contact with you are all going to benefit from your new way of being as well. Absolutely. I truly believe that. I truly believe that. So I thank you because, as I said, without you, it wouldn't be like that. I wouldn't be where I am, so tribute to you and your team. You're so welcome, Joe. Congratulations again. Joe Brennan, 62, real estate investor from Long Island, New York. Thanks. Thanks for listening to the Alcohol-Free Lifestyle podcast. 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