 Narcissists only care about themselves, part two. If we observe the narcissist's mentality, we can see that they see things in either black or white. People are either winners or losers and they are doing everything they can to avoid feeling like they are the losers. The irony is that a loser is someone who intends to cause a loss and a winner is someone who intends to cause wins. So inevitably, narcissists are always the losers. They also want you to think, feel and act in the way that they do. They want to bring out the worst in you. They want to make you more like them because it is very difficult to control a winner. It is very difficult to control someone who is likely to be successful because then they would have the power. They would have the ability to direct or influence the behaviour of others and the course of events. Although a real winner is unlikely to control or alter people in a way that might be more favourable for them. A real winner is likely to let the situation play out on its own which would then make it even more unfavourable for the narcissist because the narcissists are lacking the capabilities and potential to survive. They are dependent on other people for their survival which is why they have such an obsessive need to control them. If they can control the people around them, they can then have more control over their own lives, over their own futures. But if they cannot control the people around them, it becomes like survival of the fittest where only those with a strong desire to succeed and the ability to change as conditions change will achieve success. Narcissists cannot compete in an environment that is not under their control because they cannot adapt to changing conditions. They don't have the capabilities or potential to develop anything to support their own survival. So they have to create an environment where they are able to leech off the success of those who they believe to be superior to them. Only then can they feel like they are in control. Only then can they feel like they are not the losers. Narcissists have developed copin and defense mechanisms to avoid feeling like they are the losers. They have created a false self that is meant to be perfect. It is meant to be always right. Everything they do is justified. They are always in control. They have a strong sense of entitlement and they are deserving of everything they desire. They created this false self to feel like they are not losing because deep down they know that they are. They hate who they really are. So they had to develop a false self who is everything that they are not. Everything they wish they were. The problem is that because their false self isn't even real, they have nothing to give because there is nothing within them. There's no foundation or structure. It's all superficial. It's all on the surface. It's all an illusion and it lacks any real significance or meaning. It lacks the essential properties that it needs to survive. So all it can do is take from those who do have a foundation and structure, those who do possess something of significance and meaning and then use them to feed their false self and prolong its survival. If you talk about what they're doing or you invalidate their false self, it will cause a narcissic injury. It will only make them hate themselves even more as they begin to reflect on how they know that they are fraudsters, liars, imposters. They are not who they say they are. They are not how they portray themselves to be and they know this. They just don't want anyone to start speaking on it. They want everyone to pretend that they are their false self so that they can continue existing in the fantasy world that they've created to avoid feeling like they are losing that life. They hold a mask of being everything that they are not. Everything they wish they were but underneath that is a very weak, fragile, immature, self-hating individual who only cares about their own self-interest or needs and cannot deal with reality. They create this false narrative as though they are in control and that is what they want you to believe. They want you to believe that their false narrative is reality and if they are able to do this they are able to control you. If they can get you to believe in their false narrative it makes it more believable for them and then you can both exist in their false reality together and in denial of what is actually happening in the real world. If they can pull you into their world they are more able to control you. In their world you have to play by their rules. You have to exist in the role that they have assigned to you and it will never be a role that is based in any truth or reality. It is a role that is designed to feed their ego and make them feel special or important and will usually be either a projection of their positive or negative traits. The role that they assign to you has more to do with how they see themselves rather than how they see you. Narcissists only care about themselves. Their priority is to feed their egos. Their priority is to regulate their self-worth, self-esteem and self-importance and the more they feed their egos the stronger their desire becomes until they are willing to abuse people without any empathy or consideration for them. Because the only thing that matters to them is their own interests or needs. Feeling guilt or remorse for other people isn't going to feed their egos. They are too preoccupied with their own interests or needs to care about you. They are in a committed relationship with their false self and there is no room for anyone else. Anyone who comes between them and their false self is likely to be in serious danger. They can be very convincing and making you believe that they love or care for you but they don't even love or care for themselves. They abandon who they really are and now all that is left is their false self and an empty void within them. They do not have the capacity to love or care for you. They have no empathy or consideration for you. All they care about is themselves. All they care about is feeding their egos and serving their own interests or needs. They have no soul. They have no humanity and so they have nothing for you. They will always leave you worse off than before you met them. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonated with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. If you are delighted with the name, my PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching and Choirs can email me and ask for my coaching at juma.com. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.