 The Jack Benny program presented by America's largest selling cigarette lucky strike Lucky strike first again with tobacco man first again with a man who really know tobacco the independent auctioneers buyers and warehousemen Yes, a recent impartial survey shows that more independent tobacco experts smoke lucky strike regularly than the next two leading brands Combined so let this overwhelming smoking preference of the experts Lead you to a real deep down smoking enjoyment. Just light up a lucky and puff by puff. You'll see lsmft Lsmft lucky strike means fine tobacco and this fine lucky strike tobacco means a world of smoking enjoyment for you Yes, puff by puff pack by pack. You'll like lucky strike the lucky strike program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston Phil Harris Rochester Dennis Day and yours truly Don Wilson Gentlemen last Thursday was Thanksgiving. So let's go back and show you how Jack Benny and his gang spent the day Our scene opens in Jack's home in Beverly Hills Thanksgiving comes and goes, but I'm never done Rochester I'm working all the time. I'm nothing but a one-man assembly line Rochester Al Jolson, I'm scrubbing the floor Rochester you've been singing all day today. Well, I'm happy boss. Here's this Thanksgiving. I could have been born to turkey Oh, you wouldn't like that, huh? No, I couldn't stand being in an oven all undressed and people peeping in at me every few minutes And when you ain't got no head you can't tell them to close the door I know I know say Rochester I'm going to Miss Livingston's house for a Thanksgiving party. So will you help me get dressed? Okay, but if I were you I'd change my mind about wearing that old tuxedo Why what'd you do to it? Oh, it's nothing. I did boss, but when I went to get it the closet was full of moths Moths Oh my goodness. Were they eating my tuxedo eating it? They didn't even look up when I came in Well, maybe it won't show what part were they eating? Well to put it geographically the south ain't solid anymore Oh stop being silly every time I want to get dressed you all I'll get it Mr. Benny's residence starved stage green and radio. Hello, Rochester Christmas cards printed to your specifications We'll sit with babies mow your lawn catered private parties and we'll give violin recitals at birthdays weddings and meet market opening On this line and their business as good as anybody Oh, well look Rochester. Yes, ma'am. It's for you boss. It's miss Livingston. Oh Hello, Mary. Hello Jack pretty soon and Mary. I got a surprise for you I'm gonna dress formal for my tuxedo isn't green. Oh stop. Oh, sure. Mary. I'll stop at the drugstore and get some lifesavers Oh, no the mince alone don't marry but You're going to the expense of the entire dinner. Why should you spend more? After all you're doing enough Oh, oh, oh Oh, oh Well, Mary, why didn't you come right out and say so? Of course, I'll bring it. Goodbye. Goodbye What'd you say, Mary? This is mrs. Stewart on your party line. Oh, hello, mrs. Stewart Don't hello me and you can cancel my order for Christmas. But mrs. Stewart and that goes for me too. What this is mrs. Stevens on your other party line But mrs. Stevens, I'll get some mrs. Allman, please have a regular priceless I wish there weren't so many people on my party line They all listened in the other day when I was talking to my agency baton barton dursten and osborne I'll get it Rochester I wish I were all alone on my telephone There was no one else about me Hello, mr. Bennet. Oh, mr. Kitzel. What brings you here? I was passing by and I stopped to wish you a happy Thanksgiving. Oh, well, that's nice of you. Come on in. Thank you Wait till I tie this leash Oh, you've got your dog with you. No, my turkey. I'm taking him out for a walk Mr. Kitzel, you're taking a turkey for a walk? A long Why by the time we get home, she'll be so glad to lay down the rest will be easy Well, tell me Well, tell me mr. Kitzel. Are you uh, are you going to have much company at your Thanksgiving dinner? My wife's relatives. Oh, just your wife's relatives, huh? Just You should have so many listeners Hey, mr. Kitzel, how many are going to be there? Well, there's going to be my wife's mother and father, her sister-claw dad, her three brothers, one of her aunts, two of her nephews, and a distant cousin from kukimangi Hey, your wife really has a big family. Yeah, well, I got to be running along. Oh, but first mr. Bennet I got to tell you how much I enjoyed your radio program last week. Thank you Oh my You you You like it, huh? Yeah, I like that. Oh, it's such a trouble you had when you was calling your agency baton barton bagel and blin says No No, no, no, mr. Kitzel. See my agency is baton barton dursten and osborne. Well, leave and learn And guess yes and guess. Well. Goodbye, mr. Bennet. I got to be going Goodbye, mr. Kitzel. It was nice seeing you. The feeling is natural And imagine taking a turkey for a walk. Oh my goodness. Look what time it is Rochester. Help me get dressed now I'm late from this living since party. See, I'll bet the whole gang is there having a I didn't come here to criticize. I'm not here to sympathize But don't tell me those no good lies cause the lion gal I do despise She's got fake ribs and butter beans ham hocks and turnip greens You and me and New Orleans and that's what I like about the south Is that livy? You better sing another chorus. The turkey isn't dead yet This jack would get here. Hey, Phil, that was a swell idea bringing your whole band over here to Mary's house Yeah, wasn't it? Phil, I don't mind your band being here But your boys have a lot of nerve putting one of my best dishes on the piano for an ashtray. That ain't no ashtray That's for tips. What a gang. They uh, Mary can I eat now? I've got to leave in half an hour Uh, why, where are you going Don? To my sister's house for dinner Oh for heaven's sake. Hey, livy, hand me a bottle opener. My boys are hungry Never mind that. We'll eat in a few minutes. I hope so. I've been here since 6 30 this morning 6 30 this morning. Why Dennis, how come you got here so early? Oh, my mother had to deliver the milk anyway So I thought I'd ride over with her Over on the milk truck? Well, I rode over on the cow. Her customers like it fresh Wait a minute kid. You mean your mother comes right up to the door and milks the cow herself Yeah, my mother's the best milker in the country. She is? Sure She can squirt right through the hole of a donut at 20 paces Yesterday she turned the cow upside down and hit the oan, honest john Oh stop being so silly. Hey fellas, let's have some more music. Come on charlie hit it Oh, hey, wait a minute Phil. Can I play the drums? Sure, go ahead dancy beat it out Don't get up. You're sitting on my orchestra Don't break up the house. I've got to go out in the kitchen. See how my maid is doing I can't give you anything but love, baby That's it. Oh, uh pauline as soon as mr. Bennegas here. We'll have dinner. Yes, ma'am and remember my instruction Yes, miss livingston. I must serve everybody from the left everybody except don wilson How do I serve mr. Wilson from both sides and jump back fast? Now, let me see. Um, what else? Hey levy. I just thought of something. Oh, just a minute phil. I'm talking to my maid Wow Get a load of them legs phil. I'm looking at the turkey Anyway, living with the foods already. Let me know. I'll help you serve it. Oh, thanks phil, but it won't be necessary I've hired a butler for the day. Okay. I'd like to see that turkey nabe than soup phil Get out of here I'm just crazy about that man phil harris. Yeah, he's got so much more than greggory and he doesn't fight it Now I've heard everything And the door buzzer too I'll get a pauline I can't give you anything, but love Maybe that's the only thing Oh, hello jack. What took you so long? I had to start for the candy. Here you are. Mary. Thanks. Is everybody here? Sure. Uh jack, they're in the living room. Let's go in Jack, you did wear that old tuxedo, didn't you? Oh, it's not so old Hey, hiya fellas. Hello phil. Well, if it ain't the green hornet Hello, mr. Benny. I've been here since 6 30 That's nice. Say Mary You know, I noticed something peculiar as I came over here You know that white line that goes down the middle of the street? Yeah Well, it goes up over the curb across your sidewalk and right up to your door the white line Holy smoke. My mother's cow must have a loose gasket A loose what uh, I'll explain to you later. Hey jackson, I brought my whole band over here They're in the other room. Yeah, the sportsman's quartet came too. Well, this is really gonna be a party Oh, darn it. I forgot my violin I'll go back and get it jackson. You take one step to that door and I'll hit you so hard Your two-pale spin like a spike jones record Okay, if you don't want any entertainment, oh, we'll have entertainment say danis It'll be a little while before we eat. So how about a song? Yeah, come on danis. How about it, huh? Sure. Sure. Go ahead kid. Yeah, go ahead kid. It's about time somebody asked me. I've been here since 6 30 Now come on Dennis go ahead and sing your song. I'll get it Mary. Hold the song till I come back. Will you kid? Yes, how do you do Is this miss livingston's residence? Yes. Yes, it is. Well, miss livingston is expecting me for Thanksgiving dinner Oh, oh, we'll come right in you got here just in time. You know the fun starting. How nice Here Here, let me take your hat. Thank you You're cold. Thank you. Now follow me. Hey kids. Oh, pardon me. I didn't introduce myself. I'm jack Benny How do you do? I'm the new butler. Hey kids, what? You're the the butler. Yes. Are you the downstairs man? They happen to be a guest here. Well, you could have fooled me If you're the butler the kitchen the kitchen is right through that door. Thank you Nobody. Well, who's coat and how do you carry? No, dine. It's your butlers. He just came in All right. Well, I know how to keep help go ahead and sing Dennis I'm I've been here since 6 30 all marching. You know conga lie. Okay, don't Don't swing it. Tell us the dinner will get cold. Okay. Let's what's this dish on top of the piano Jackson get your hands out. Listen. Where's the piano bench or here? I come with the piano bunch It's cards and everything how did Phil know where to sit he can't read I put his picture on the plate That's your fault bunch. You got people thinking I can't read Oh, yeah, let me see your right your name. Don't change the subject. I'm talking about reading I thought so. Oh keeping that butler. I don't know why you hired that smart alec butler anyway I'll get them. Hey, Ernest Hey, yes, sir Ernest, we're ready to Ernest, why'd you come in here barefooted? Where are your shoes? Don't you remember? I handed them to you when I came here I used to work in a winery stop Just bring in the food. You'll have to wait the turkey won't be ready for a few minutes yet Well kids, it looks like we have to wait a while. Yeah Dennis. How about singing another song? Say jack Phil's band is here in the sportsman's quartet and they've got a swell arrangement of an old square dance number A square dance number say I haven't heard one of those in a long time. What do you want me to sing? Sit down kid. Thanks. I've been here since 6 30 What? I would have been here earlier, but the cow didn't have a bag pack On the piano and do the square dance. Look, I'll grab a violin from one of the boys. Here you are Jackson. Thanks Now, how about it Don? Okay, let's go fellas turkey and the straw. Okay, wait for me now. Wait for me See what? A lucky strike disperse that can very serve the turkeys on the table. Okay. Okay. Come on in Sure. I love to carve. Give me that knife Mary what do you want white meat or dark meat white meat, please. How about you Dennis? I'll have a drumstick Okay, Don. What would you like white meat dark meat a leg or a wing? Yes. Thank you with gravy You know Don if you were twins, I'd have a good slogan for you. What is it? Guess which twin ate the pony And Miss Livingston, shall I serve the hot biscuits now? Yes, Ernest. Very well, madam There Ernest, don't throw the biscuit certainly not. Why don't you stand closer to the table? I've been watching these people eat and I don't want to get any on me And that old man with the carving knife scares me today You'll type those blue. I'm just mad because my tuxedo is better than yours. Why you? Your job is to serve the food not to antagonize the green hornet. I mean Yes, madam. Say mr. Benny. How about making a speech? Yeah, come on speech jack speech Yeah, go ahead. Go ahead jack. Say something. You know, this is the first time we've all had dinner together in a long time. Okay, I'll make a speech Well kids It's your nice for all of us to be here on Thanksgiving Thanksgiving The day set aside where families can gather together in common bond and humbly give thanks in a spirit of brotherly love Thank you Yes Thanksgiving a day that was originally started By the pilgrim fathers the pilgrim fathers That stalwart staunch group of men and women who left their native shore don't stop eating And after months of suffering had their hardship rewarded by safely landing at Cape Cod in the year of 1620 Yes, our pilgrim fathers jack our pilgrim fathers jack What is it don the pilgrims didn't land at Cape Cod. They landed at Plymouth rock No, no, no don it was Cape Cod jack any schoolboy knows it was Plymouth rock How can you say Cape Cod don't tell me anything about history? I went to school too and I say the pilgrims landed at Cape Cod They didn't land at Cape Cod. It was Plymouth rock. They landed at Cape Cod. And if you don't put down that carving knife Oh, pardon me Beast Don this is Thanksgiving. So let's not quarrel you think it was Plymouth rock But I know it was Cape Cod and you can take my word for it. I know what I'm talking about Well, so do I it was Plymouth rock. It was Cape Cod Oh for heaven's sake cut it out Ernest serve the dessert. Will you I will if those two gentlemen don't get off the table Why will if he will I'll have some more of the white meat. That's my leg You should tell me sooner. I put gravy on it I'm wilson I think it's awful for you to come here on Thanksgiving Except Mary's hospitality eat my lifesavers and start a big argument like this I didn't start the argument you did and you can ask anybody and they'll tell you the pilgrims landed on Plymouth rock I don't care who you ask. I still say they landed at Cape Cod jack for goodness sake finish the speech you start I'll do it if everybody will shut up here here I won't speak Now as I was saying We're gathered here on Thanksgiving Day in the spirit of friendship A word that in itself represents that binding tie between all people Let's try friends Let's try to keep the feeling that is so prevalent on this day throughout the entire year So whenever you feel discouraged Just think of the spirit of those pilgrims who sailed across the ocean deep and finally landed We're back in just a moment, but first A recent impartial survey covering all the southern tobacco markets reveals this important fact More independent tobacco experts smoke lucky strike regularly than the next two leading brands combined Yes, lucky strike first again with tobacco men, but what does that mean to me? Simply this these independent tobacco experts have had years of experience buying selling and handling tobacco And it's important for you to know that more of these independent tobacco experts smoke lucky strike regularly than the next two leading brands combined You've heard the survey results now. Here's what mr. James Monroe ball 33 years of tobacco auctioneer Who sold more than 400 million pounds of tobacco recently said at market after market I've seen the makers of lucky strike by a fine ripe Mellow leaf good rich tobacco that makes a swell smoke I'll smoke luckiest 31 years a lucky strike smoker for 31 years And mr. Ball like you looks to the cigarette. He smokes for enjoyment real deep down smoking enjoyment So light up a lucky yourself puff by puff. You'll see ls mft Lucky strike means fine tobacco and this fine lucky strike tobacco means a world of smoking enjoyment for you That's why you'll like lucky strike Boys it's pretty late. Why don't you go to bed? Wait a minute, Rochester. I'm looking something up in this history book There it is In the year of 1620 the pilgrims landed at Plymouth rock It wasn't Cape Cod It was Plymouth rock Don wilson was right Well, I hate to do this, but I guess I'll just have to call him up and fire him He's so smart. He can get another job Ladies and gentlemen stay tuned in for the philaharist Alice Freishor which follows immediately And on saturday nights to be sure to hear a day in the life of Dennis day and the lucky strike hit parade starring frank sanatra This is NBC the national broadcasting company You