 Hello, hello, and welcome back to my personal favorite website. Clickhole! If you don't know about Clickhole, I've made a couple videos on here before, but it's a fake website, I mean it's a real website, but it's a fake website. But it's real, it's a real website, but the content on it is fake, okay? They've tried a bunch of different quizzes and stuff in the past, or they've made a bunch. And one of them was about being a big jazz boy, a little jazz boy, and I made that video quite a long time ago, but with the 10-year montage that came out, there was a clip of that in there, and I was like, oh, I should go back and do more quizzes on Clickhole! My name is Aaron Streft, and I invented a new kind of good and plenty for cattle. Would you care to try one? Ah-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Are your toenails f***ed up enough for your health insurance to cover getting a pedicure as a medical procedure? Let's do this! Oh! Getting a pedicure is sometimes just the pick-me-up you need in the middle of a stressful week, but they don't come cheap. Luckily, you might be able to get it covered by insurance if your toenails are so f***ed up, it's considered a medical procedure. Do you qualify? Most insurance policies specifically require that toenails be pretty goddamn f***ed up for a procedure to be considered medically necessary. How many toenails do you have, on average, per toe? One, two, three, or more? None! Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Let's do none! One way to convince your health insurance to cover a procedure if your policy is strict about what it considers a cosmetic procedure versus a medical procedure is to prove your toenails pose a danger to yourself or others. When's the last time you caught yourself with your toenails? Badly enough to be hospitalized over a year ago last month or I am currently hospitalized from that. I'm gonna do over a year ago. Reading the fine print of your policy is key to knowing whether or not it covers a full procedure. Emery board, foot soak, and all. How does your insurance policy define fucked up enough to make a pre-medicure medically necessary? It's disastrously overgrown to the point they affect the ability of you and those around you to eat and breathe. Rusty moss covered bleeding from the nail itself, otherwise significantly tarnished. The toenails that lack razzle dazzle and simply are not as hot as they could be. Let's do that one! Your insurance policy may not say anything about this specifically, but we are just curious. In a pinch, would you be able to use your toenails as ice skates? No. Sure, but they won't- I wouldn't be able to skate very far. Yeah, or I actually always use my toenails instead of skate. I'm going, yeah. In some cases, incredibly fucked up toenails can be classified as a disability. How encumbered by the weight of your toenails are you? I can no longer run. I cannot move. I'm gonna do- I can no longer run. H.R. Gieger is an acclaimed Swiss surrealist painter responsible for designing the nightmarish creatures in the Alien film series. If he were still alive, what would H.R. Gieger do if he saw your toenails? He would smile when he saw them, he would make a quick sketch of them, or he would do an entire art show based on them. He would smile when he saw them. Typically toenails do not move on their own to yours? Not a little, but only a few of them. Now that you mention it, yes. They're constantly slithering, vibrating and pulsating. I'm gonna do a little, but only a few of them. Not all of them move, it's mainly just the pinky toe and the big toe at the same time. They're trying to do this tug-of-war on my foot. In the middle ones, they're just shit out of- they're just along for the ride. Many policies define flacked up toenails as those that are infested with all kinds of shit. What kinds of infestations do your toenails have? No infestations here, well I guess there are a few worms living in there. Swarms of centipedes and mites call my toenails home. Everything up to and including fish. We know you're eager to find out if insurance will cover a pedicure as a medical procedure. But we have one more question. Are any of your toenails grown together? No, they're all individual toenails. Just the fourth little piggy and pinky toenail. Yeah, are they not supposed to be? Both of my feet essentially share one big toenail. I'm gonna do just the fourth little piggy and my pinky. Hey, hey, hey! There's a solid chance that your toenails are fucked up enough that getting a pedicure just might be covered by your insurance. You might want to send a few photos to your insurance provider just to be sure. But odds are you're about to enjoy a free pedicure. Alright, let's go back to the quizzes. I need more, I need more. You were supposed to be on goose patrol. How many of these goose incidents have happened under your watch? The time a goose escaped, the area acceptable for geese and ran off with the microphone during the funeral sermon. The time a goose slipped its goose monitor off and bit Prince Charles on the foreskin twice once in a friendly way and once in a mean way. The time a renegade goose hissed so loudly it covered up a dying father's last words of wisdom to his children. The time a goose made it through a hospital's goose detector and laid eggs into a man's chest while he was having heart surgery. That did happen under my watch. The time a goose fooled a priest into thinking it was an angel so he would feed him bread. The time a flock of geese flew onto the set of the voice and Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton had to kill them all with folding chairs. The time a goose snuck into a baby stroller and allowed the baby to smoke a bag of cigarettes that did happen, I was the babysitter, I should have known. Sorry. Oh boy, well looks like a fair amount of these goose incidents happened under your watch. Could be worse, but really gotta stop slacking here and take your goose patrol duties more seriously. Do you have the prancing, the prancing, whistling and juggling skills it takes to become a navy seal? Let's find out. The navy seals are the best of the best and not just anyone can make the cut. Of the many who try, only a small percent of recruits have the prancing, whistling and juggling skills needed to make it through the grueling training and join the ranks of the navy seals. Do you have what it takes? During the infamous hell week portion of training seal recruits must prove their mettle under extreme mental and physical duress. One of the many arduous tasks recruits face is running over 200 miles on next to no sleep. What strategy would you employ to make it through this grueling challenge? I would attempt to trip over as many rocks as debris as possible in the hope that the constant tripping would constantly propel me forward without having to expend much energy. I would lay down on my side and start rolling until I got some good momentum going then fall asleep and trust that I would keep rolling. I would prance as I have never pranced before gliding effortlessly like a gazelle, my feet barely touching the ground as I leap, spin and twirl across the muddy terrain with balletic grace and jazzy flair. That's the one! Due to the nature of their work as one of the most lethal special operations forces in the world, it's critical for navy seals to be able to whistle loudly and beautifully. How would you use whistling to neutralize an enemy combatant who ambushes you while you're unarmed? I could do a few things here. I could attempt to scare him off with a very loud burst of whistling but then immediately get a tongue cramp because there's so much strain leaving me no option but to surrender. Let out a short, faint whistle and pray that it does the trick and that's all about I can do whistling wise. I would go to the nearest jukebox and play a song with lots of whistling in it then lip sync along with the whistling to trick the enemy into thinking I'm an elite whistler. I would peel off my shirt and whistle the entirety of Gachi's Easter Parade while performing a dazzling array of prances and juggles in perfect synchrony until the enemy runs away screaming into the ocean. Whimsical and well choreographed juggling performances during combat are a specialty of the navy seals that never fail to strike fear into the hearts of foes. What innovative and draw-jopping juggling skills would you bring to the battlefield? I'm not really sure what juggling is. I want to do that one. I can juggle three M4A1 automatic carbines in 5.56 millimeter caliber with bayonet affixed while they spray bullets in all directions. No, no, no. I'm not really sure what juggling is. Strength, endurance, mental toughness, intelligence none of these traits mean a damn thing to the seals if you can't really prance your ass off. Describe how you would use your prancing skills to deadly effect while extracting a captured comrade from a remote terrorist compound. From the moment my feet touch the ground after repelling out of the helicopter I would execute a jaw-dropping series of prances that would fill the enemy with awe and terror. I would prance faster and faster until I became a dizzying blur and then descend on the terrorist compound like a banshee out of hell prancing every which way until all the enemies were dead and I could safely free my fellow seal. The life of a professional soldier can be brutal and the things you see as a seal will be etched into your memory forever. You must be prepared to lose close friends witness atrocities no one should have to witness. Live with the extreme violence you will be committing as an elite warrior. How would you protect yourself from being destroyed mentally in the face of these bleak realities? I would try to cheer myself up by whistling terribly. I would wear a bracelet that says whistling to serve as a constant reminder of the beautiful sound of whistling. I would set aside an hour each morning to whistle a grand and glorious tone full of run slides and complex tempo changes that fills my heart with patriotism and inspires me to keep fighting to keep our nation free and safe in particularly difficult moments such as when I'm watching a fellow seal die on the battlefield I would missile the same tune but much, much louder drowning out my sorrow and fear with the awesome power of whistleblowers. Your squad has been down by cyberfire. You take cover by the trash helicopter but it's only a matter of time before the shots take you all out. What would you do in this situation? I would walk out, relax, pace from behind the helicopter, blow into a referee's whistle to call a timeout and then juggle handfuls of sand in an attempt to mimic the air cloudy so it obscures the sniper's vision. Welcome to the Navy Seals, soldier. Your answers prove that you can prance, whistle and juggle with the best of them. You are the elite amongst the elite possessing, prancing, whistling and chuckling skills that most men and women can only dream of. With skills like yours you are a shoo-in to serve your country as a member of the Navy SEAL. Your Shigeru Miyamoto, can you promote the Super Mario at the PAX gaming convention? You bet I can. Your Shigeru Miyamoto, the creator of Super Mario. Yes, that is me or no, I'm someone else. Yes, that's me. Long ago you had a dream about a plumber who murders turtles after years of hard working dedication. You have finally turned that dream into a video game called Super Mario. However, nobody will play your turtle murder game if they don't know it exists. The only way to make Super Mario's success is to promote it at the PAX game convention. There it is. I've been in that very hall. PAX East, baby. PAX is bustling with thousands of gamers that don't know about Super Mario. If you explore the convention maybe you'll find a way to get the word out. Visit the Super Mario booth you reserve to promote your game. Try to virtual reality headset. Enter a tournament for this year's breakout game, Lords of Cash. Attend a PAX keynote speech by legendary video game lunatic Dr. Robotnik. Let's do, you know, we're here to try and promote. Let's try and promote the game. Since you reserve your booth at last minute, the only space they had left for you was in the bathroom. Unfortunately the bathroom is completely empty and there is no one here to tell about Super Mario. Nobody at PAX ever uses the toilets because that would mean less time to look at video games unless you can lure people into the bathroom. You sure won't be able to promote Mario here. Plug the toilet to flood PAX so people come to the bathroom to stop the flooding and you can tell them about Mario. Good idea. If the toilet starts spewing water and ruining PAX people will come to fix it. How do you want to clog the toilet? Flush down the toilet paper flush down your own head. Flush? Let's do the head. You stick your head into the toilet and flush, successfully clogging it and also successfully drowning yourself. When people come to fix the toilet they find your corpse jammed in the bowl which makes them really wish there were a game where you could get sucked down sewer pipes. That game is Super Mario but unfortunately you're dead so you can't tell them about it. Let's attend a keynote with legendary video game lunatic Dr. Robotnik. Good choice. PAX is famous for bringing beautiful video game legends from all over the world to complain about things on a big stage. This year's keynote speaker is the evil scientist Dr. Robotnik from classic games like Sonic the Hedgehog and Dr. Robotnik's virtual swimming lessons for Windows 95. I want to learn more. I can't read that. You walk into the lecture hall where Dr. Robotnik is going to be doing his keynote address. A voice comes over the loudspeaker and says ladies and gentlemen please welcome to the stage the founder of PAX Steve Jobs. Everyone in the audience rises to their feet and starts applauding Steve Jobs. The beloved creator of PAX. Yeah, let's keep watching. The audience continues to applaud as Steve Jobs walks on stage carrying a brand new Macintosh computer. Hello I'm Jobs. You know it's incredible to see such an amazing turnout at this year's PAX. When I first created PAX two years ago I had one simple goal. Create the ultimate gaming convention where people can come together to get yelled at by their favorite video game characters. This year, the man we've chosen to yell at all of you is truly incredible. His speech is called Take My Address of Google Maps Please welcome to the stage Dr. Robotnik. Dr. Robotnik walks on to the stage. He and Steve Jobs share a passionate kiss on the mouth. Steve Jobs whispers the words. iPod 3 Dr. Robotnik's here as he leaves the stage Dr. Robotnik steps up to the microphone. Hello PAX. Listen Take My Address of Google Maps Keep typing Dr. Robotnik's apartment into Google Maps and it tells them where I live. They find me and they make my life measurable. I don't have time to deal with these people. Let's see if this works. Google Maps. Here we go. Dr. Robotnik's apartment What do we got baby? Chestnut Hill Realty Dr. Robotnik lives Dude, he lives right next to Protochies! That's his favorite spot and Broogers Bagels Alright friends, I am going to end this one here. Thank you so much for coming along on this journey, taking some quizzes, looking at some fun things. It was a GT as they say. So thank you guys so much for watching. I will see you later. Alright Bye Bye