 Here's our next question. How do you discover that men have held from their divorce? I don't wanna be their, or healed. Okay. How do you discover that a man is healed from their divorce? I don't wanna be the rebounder or fun girl. Great question. So I wanna tell you the story about when, after my now ex-wife and I decided to split up and I put myself out on the dating sites. In fact, it was six months into the dating process and I was on Yahoo! Personals. Does anyone remember Yahoo! Personals? So I was on Yahoo! Personals and then eventually became match.com, or was it AOLpersonalsbecamematch.com but on Yahoo! Personals, I met a woman and she said, how long have you been divorced? I said, well, I'm actually been separated five months. And she said, reach out to me in a year and a half or excuse me, 18 to 24 months after your divorce and after you've had one to two transition relationships. I'm gonna repeat that, one to two transition relationship. And I wrote her back, I go, no, no, I'm ready, I'm ready, I'm ready to be in relationship. Sure enough, a few months later, I met this fantastic woman, great woman, three months into the relationship, I so wasn't ready for anything serious and we ended it. That was my first relationship. And then about a year later, I had another relationship and I realized I so wasn't ready. And I was dating a lot, I mean, I was having some, I was serial dating and casually dating, but I realized I wasn't capable of a serious relationship. And then sure enough, two years later, that woman who I mentioned wrote me the message saying reach out to me after 18 to 24 months or one to two transition relationship. This is when I actually became a dating coach at this time, I wrote her back and I said, I finally get what you meant, you are so right. I so wasn't ready for a relationship shortly after my divorce, I needed one or two transition relationship just to get a sense of my bearings. And quite frankly, the divorce was contentious. And the last thing you want is to deal with someone when they're going through a contentious divorce. So my feeling is this, it's very risky to date someone who hasn't healed from their divorce and hasn't healed from their dating process. So folks, I've been on a journey since my divorce for 15 years now. I've had a couple relationships, significant, I've had one significant relationship, a couple short-lived relationships. And a lot of that time I've been working on myself, a lot of work on myself. In fact, some people might be wondering why you're still single, Jonathan. Look, I've gone through a lot of trauma in the last few years of my life. My significant relationship ended four years ago. And then six months after that relationship ended, I lost my mother. There's a picture of my mom and dad. And then six months later, I lost my son. That's him caught it right there. I'm still probably healing from it. And there's fear in getting attached to somebody because I have a fear of abandonment now. I've been talking to my therapist about this. And while I feel rather secure in who I am, there's, you know, I can't say that I'm not feeling a sense of fear. Have I fully healed? I don't know if I ever fully heal from the loss of my son. Does that mean I'm not capable of being in a relationship? No, that doesn't mean that. Healing is an ongoing process. What's most important is, are you catching someone? Here's the thing, I want you to think of, they're going into the pit of despair. Are you catching them on the way down? Are you catching them at the bottom? Are you catching them on the way up? Are you catching them on the way out? I feel like I'm on the way out of the pit of despair. The tricky part is trying to figure out where they're at in this upside down belt, this bell curve, if you will. One of the reasons why I'm a coach is to help you bear this stuff out sooner rather than later by being radically honest by asking tougher questions right from the get-go, especially before the penis goes inside the vagina. You want to get a sense of how legit is this person? You know, healing is an ongoing thing for men and women alike. We're all healing in some way, shape or form of abandonment, of trust issues, of fear. Everybody, you know, the number one emotional health issue facing almost everybody is I'm not good enough, I'm not lovable and I'm not likable. So we're all dealing with emotional stuff. I'm a big proponent of doing work, whether it's therapy, whether it's personal development, well, whether it's self-help or spiritual work, it's why I wrote my book. It's a journey of personal development, self-help and spiritual work. That's why I recommend all the time getting my book so you get started on this process. Do you have to be with someone who's going with therapy? No, do you have to date someone who's going through personal development? No. Have they done some healing from their past? Those are some questions I'd want to ask, have answered to determine if they may, and by the way, remember I started this broadcast off. The biggest challenge of all is most people lie to themselves. This is why you have to become a great detective and this is why I teach everyone in my coaching how to pre-qualify your prospects. So if you need some help with that again, schedule a call with me. All right, great question. Thank you so much.