 The story of Dr. Kildare. Whatsoever house I enter, there will I go for the benefit of the sick. Whatsoever things I see or hear concerning the life of men, I will keep silence thereon. Counting such things to be held as sacred trust. I will exercise my art solely for the... The story of Dr. Kildare starring Lou Ayers and Lionel Barrymore. Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer brought you those famous motion pictures. Now this exciting, heartwarming series is heard on radio. In just a moment, the story of Dr. Kildare. But first, your announcer. Blair General Hospital. One of the great citadels of American medicine. The clump of grey-white buildings planted deep in the heart of New York. The nerve center of medical progress where great minds and skilled hands wage man's everlasting battle against death and disease. Blair General Hospital. Where life begins, where life ends, where life goes on. Things have been quiet around the hospital for over a week. Anything could happen. A meteor could fall on the east wing. We could have an epidemic of bubonic plague. Karoo could suddenly become intelligent. Oh, that's ridiculous. You mean about Karoo? Well, I guess that's a little far-fetched. I mean, the whole idea is ridiculous. Just because you've got a feeling of some sort is no reason to believe. Good morning, Dr. Gillespie. Good morning. Parker, you've got that gleam of baffle in your eye. What's up? Oh, it's Dr. Gillespie. He has a hunch some catastrophe is about to happen. Well, don't worry about it. I've seen his hunches turn out wrong before. Maybe so, Jimmy. Maybe so. But you've also seen him turn out right. Sure. Sometimes. Law of averages. Law of averages. Oh, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear. Errol, for the first time in my life, I hope you really do have a crisis. Oh, I do, Dr. Fletcher. We do. Blair Hospital does. What sort of a crisis, Dr. Karoo? Oh, it's most upsetting. A new patient came in about an hour ago. Well, now, Karoo, we've met that particular crisis successfully before. But you don't understand. This man has already disrupted the hospital routine simply knowing. What's he done? Dr. Kildare, he insists on keeping a pistol in his room and some kind of a musical instrument, a guitar, I believe he calls it. And he won't take his hat off. Won't take his hat off? Precisely, Dr. Kildare. Karoo, what's the name of this problem patient? One that's quite in keeping with his occupation. He's with a Wild West show that's playing across town. A professional cowboy, he calls himself. His name is Buffalo Barney McClure. Oh, Dr. Karoo, I still don't understand what disturbs you so much. Dr. Kildare, if you can imagine a man with long hair, a mustache, and a goatee sitting up in bed in a hospital gown holding a pistol and wearing a 10-gallon hat. Well, it's a perfectly horrible type. I tell you that I ain't never been sick a day in my whole life till this afternoon. I see. And the pain seems to center in the upper abdomen around here. Oh, out. Careful, Doc. My energy's mighty tender. They're mighty tender. Mr. McClure, what about that fall you took from your horse last night at the show? Oh, shuckings, that weren't nothing. I've been throwed by kiosk has ever since was hip-hired to a tumblebuck. But it did shake you up a little, didn't it? Well, it knocked modern bridge work out, but that fall didn't have nothing to do with this year's bellyache. I felt fine till this morning. Sometimes internal injuries don't show up for hours or even days after an accident, Mr. McClure. Call me Buffalo, Doc. I ain't used to this year, Mr. McClure stuff. All right, Buffalo. Well, Dr. Gillespie, apparently the next step is a fluoroscopic examination. That's right, sure. I know. Parker's getting an X-ray room assigned now. Boys, I sure do hope there ain't nothing real bad wrong with me. Oh, let's assume not for the present anyway. Sure would hate to think that I was occasioning my chips. Well, even if it is an injury, it probably won't be serious. Only time I ever needed to saw bones before was to dig a bullet out of my shoulder. And say, boys, I've been figuring on asking you something. Oh, what's that? That's fellow that's the boss of this year's spread. That's their Dr. Carew. Is he good any kin folks out west anywhere? Carew? No, I don't think so. Well, I used to know a fellow years ago named Three-Fingered Tom Carew. Sure would like to meet up with some of his next to kin. Well, I doubt very much if any relative of Dr. Carew would let himself be called Three-Fingered Tom. Come in, come in, come in. Oh, it's you, Parker. Come in, come in, come in. Dr. Flessy, I've got all the arrangements taken care of. You can have X-ray room number eight in 30 minutes. Oh, fine, fine, Parker. Well, boys, ain't none of you going to give me a howdy-duty to this charming little lady? Well... Parker, this is Mr. Buffalo Barney McClure. Miss Parker will be your nurse. How do you do, Mr. Buffalo? Well, now, I reckon you're just about the prettiest little urine that's come down to shooting about four months of Sunday. Really? Hello? Are you quite sure you know what you're saying? Why, you dog gone right, boys, this is my kind of a fairly fresh and sweet as a cattle range in April. Chill there. There's only one explanation. This man's worse shaped than we thought. All right, now, Buffalo, all you have to do is just stand there behind the fluorescent screen and relax. Like this, huh? Yeah, that's right now. We may have to try a berry and milkshake later, but we'll have a look first without it. Are you ready, Dr. Gillespie? Anytime, Jimmy. Anytime. Parker, turn off that examination light. All right, Doctor. Well, boys, you sure this ain't going to hurt me none? Don't you worry, Buffalo. I'm right here with you. Yeah, I'd say that any danger which may be threatening you is not from the X-ray machine. Well, but it makes a fellow feel kind of immodest to have a contraption of looking right through your innards this way. Don't worry. You won't feel a thing. Ready, Jimmy? Right. Mm-hmm. There you see now, Miss Sovacus here and... Oh, this would be a mighty fine thing for a poker game. You could see right through the car. Longs are clear. You could see the aces. How about it, boys? Are you finding anything? Not yet. You know, there seems to be some distortion at the stomach. Yeah, I noticed that, Jimmy. But what I don't see... But look, look. Over here. Huh? Well, now, what in the time nation can... Don't you recognize what it is? Recognized by the Great Horn School. Fantastic. Well, boys, let's have a showdown. What am I suffering from? Your teeth, Buffalo. My teeth? Mm-hmm. From that dental bridge work you lost last night. You swallowed it. It's lodged in your stomach. Well, holy cow, that's why I couldn't find it nowhere. Well, you weren't looking the right place, that's all. Anyway, we found it now. And as soon as we get it out of your stomach, you'll be in the first-class shape again. Now, wait just a minute. Ain't nobody gonna cut me open. Oh, I don't think an operation will be necessary. I think we can get the thing out with an esophageoscope. Esophage... What? A esophageoscope. It's an instrument designed to reach down a patient's throat and into his stomach. Just like a darned sword swaller. No, you don't, boys. That is out. Now, let's be reasonable about this. If that thing isn't removed right away, it may cause serious trouble for you. I don't give a hoot in the heart of what it may cause. And there's a sick shooter down there in my room that says there ain't nobody gonna cut me open nor shove nothing down my throat. And that's for sure. That's for dang sure. Well, I don't know what to do, Dr. Gillespie. If he won't give his permission, we can't force him to go through with it. Confound it, Jimmy. He's got to go through with it. He can't go walking around with his stomach full of teeth. Oh, I feel so sorry for poor Buffalo, and he's such a wonderful man, too. In the cattle range in April, Parker is speaking. That's just his way of being gallant and charming. Why, you've got yourself thrown, hog-tied, and ready for branding before he's even swung his larry. That's all right, Dr. Gillespie. You can tell by the way he talks. He knows a pretty girl when he sees one. No, come in, Dr. Gillespie. Gentleman, I just saw your diagnosis in the Buffalo Barney case. Yes, another oddity for the hospital files. That man named Telf is an oddity, Dr. Gillespie. Careful, Carol. You're speaking of the man Parker loved. Oh, why, Miss Parker, I certainly hope you're not guilty of any irregularity. Of course not. Why do you make me so mad? An eccentric sort of woman. Well, fortunately, gentlemen, it shouldn't take long to remove those dentures and get rid of this Buffalo person once and for all. I'm afraid it's not that simple, Dr. Carol. He's refused to let us do anything at all for him. But he can't do that. Why, he's already incensed the entire fourth floor by playing that guitar and singing at the top of his voice. The man is utterly mad. Oh, no, that's unkind, Dr. Carol. Besides, Buffalo seems to have quite a high regard for you. In fact, he was asking whether you might be related to an old acquaintance of his named a three-fingered Tom Carol. Dr. Kildare, I can assure you that no member of my family has ever been referred to as three-fingered Tom. Oh, that's exactly what we told Buffalo Barney. And in a way, it's too bad, Carol. You and our elderly cowboy patient might have become close friends. I can hardly imagine myself becoming close friends, as you call it. Yes, I know, Dr. Carol. However, we have an idea. Idea? Yes. Yes, if you were to tell Buffalo Barney that you are related to three-fingered Tom, nephew, I think. Nephew? That's right, sure. He believes you to be a relative of a friend of his. Then he'll accept your advice and give his permission for immediate treatment, don't you see? Not too clearly. Carol, it'll solve the problem in nothing flat. You think so? Oh, yes, indeed I do. And now we'll excuse you, sir, you go up and tell him right this minute. Dr. Kildare, why are you pushing me? Well, we don't want to detain you, Dr. Carol. Ah, here's the door. Found it, Jimmy, he'll bungler just as sure as you're born. You had a premonition that something was going to happen. I don't know. Maybe we'd better follow him. Buffalo's room right ahead, Jimmy. Everything seems to be quiet around the old courier. Yes, even the guitar is apparently getting a temporary rest. What's the matter, Carol? Don't have a shovel in your life. Come on, come on in here. This room is empty. Now be calm, Dr. Carol. Now, what's this all about? Well, what I told him, I was the nephew of three-finger Tom. He reached for his gun. He says he's had a feud with that family and he'll kill any of them on site. Well, Carol, now we all have to go some time. And at least you'll be dying with your boots on. Please, Dr. Blastbeard, this is not an occasion for liberty. There you are, Carol, oh, dear. I've seen you sneak in here, you wall-agged sidewinder. Now, Mr. Pupple, all that's the reason for all this. You're going to meet your maker. You're drawing your final breath right now. Hey, take it easy. If you got any last words, I'll give a gun to you right on over. Boys, get... Buffalo, put that confounded pistol away before it goes off and hurts somebody. Why, heck, fire. It ain't loaded with nothing but blanks. Hey, Buffalo, born in McClure, wouldn't ever shoot an unarmed man. I was just a fun in him. It's too bad he didn't know it. It's out like a light. Buffalo! Oh, Buffalo, are you all right? Oh, shucks, honey, I'm all right, but this year, Karoo filler's done swoon plum away. Well, good heavens. We've got to do something. Out of the mouths of the bee. Parker, would it be too much of an imposition on a young filly to ask it a trot down to the dispensary and bring some smelling salts for a dangerous Dan Karoo? Hurry up, Dr. Kildare, in just a moment. Sorry, blue air says Dr. Kildare. Can I... Oh, you're patient. Oh, self-styled grand old man in the west is propped up in bed serenading prairie flower Parker at the moment. And Karoo? Well, he's resting quietly, locked up in his suite. He ought to be locked up somewhere. I don't know. I think he'd manage to get into some kind of a predicament even in a padded cell. Yeah, the Hankam poof. And since that idea of ours didn't work, we still got the problem of Buffalo. What are we going to do now? Release him and forget about him as long as he's so confounded stubborn. Well, that's all we can do, I guess. Unless he decides to cooperate. But I hate to leave it that way. It's dangerous. Yeah, that bridge work could start an irritation that might become pretty serious in a little while. But what can you do? It's just it. I don't know. Wish I did. Jimmy, a doctor can't afford to worry about impossibilities. Once he's done all he can, well, he's got to let it go at that. How can you be sure that you've done all you can? I mean, sometimes you have... Well, now it's our little girl of the Golden Way. No, I'm just so happy today, Dr. Leslie, that it doesn't matter what you say. It doesn't matter at all. But why so starry, I'd park her. I didn't know you were such a great lover of western folk songs. No, but it's the way Buffalo sings them, Dr. Kierler. He's terrific. Only a cowboy, sweetheart. He's such a man of the great outdoors. A man's man, if you know what I mean. Well, and where do you come in? I think that once a man has lived in the western-range country, there's a flavor that clings to him the rest of his life. Yeah, sure. Especially to his boot. And what a life for him in the morning to watch the rosy-fingered dawn steal out of the east. While you're chopping fire, what for the kitchen stove? Then down to the little house and back to gather up the eggs for breakfast. Oh, so you're going to keep chickens on the ranch? Well, a few hens, I think, just for the eggs. Oh, none of this is real, of course, Dr. Gillespie. I'm just dreaming. That's all. Well, Parker, as long as that's what you're doing, it'd be nice if you could dream up some way of getting Buffalo to let us take that bridge work from his stomach. Oh, I forgot to tell you, Dr. Kierler. He's already agreed. He's already what? Agreed to let you go ahead with the treatment. You see, he's doing it for me. You should never underestimate a girl's influence on a man's heart. It's not his heart, Parker. It's his stomach. And if you're a girl, I'm a mere peeling infant. You're looking a gift horse in the mouth, Dr. Gillespie. Come on, let's go to work. Boys, when that fine little woman asked me to do it for her sake, I just melted away. Like a snowball in you. Well, Parker's usually better known for putting on the chill rather than taking it off. Well, I'll tell you, boys, when a pretty girl starts to sugar in me up, I get... I get it, skittish. She's a bob til pony in flight, huh? And apparently the same effect can be achieved by a horse-faced old man. Stop! I sure would hate to thank you for scatting some of their mad-ass Persians on that little girl. Oh, no, Buffalo, nothing like that, Dr. Gillespie. It's a peculiar sense of humor, that's all. Yeah, I'm a veritable clown. As a matter of fact, I've often suspected him of being an unsuccessful shooter for the affections of that same little lady. Killed her? Well, Doc, all I can say is let the fight be fair and I hope the best man wins. Well, I hope not. What the darnation would I do with her? I mean... Well, howdy, Miss Parker. Howdy, Buffalo. Howdy, Parker. I have everything ready now in the X-ray room. You can go ahead whenever you like. Good, let's get started then. Now, just hold your horses a minute there, boys. I was hoping that maybe we could do this thing tomorrow or maybe the next day. I have no point in putting it off. The sooner it's done, the quicker it's over. Yeah, but, Doc, go ahead. More I think about having that easel than what you might call it shoved down my gut. More just one. But, Buffalo... Uh-huh. You just can't back out now. You've already promised the little lady there. Yeah, I know it, Carl. I'd rather be hog-tied and branded. Courage, Buffalo. The eyes of Texas are upon you. They are? And a promise is a promise. Doc, I reckon you're right. Of course I am. Well, it's a matter of honor between a man and his own conscience. You're speaking a language we savvy out in God's country, mister. Then what do you say? Well, my duty says clear as a bell of a bowl came from a frosty morning. Miss Parker, would you do me the honor of handing me my boots? With, I positively and utterly refuse even to consider doing it. And that is by law. Well, Dr. Carew, there's no reason to be scared of him now. No, he can bite you. Is he the right bear on the table? I am not scared. I simply will not have anything more to do with that man. Well, in that case, Dr. Carew, I'm afraid you'd better expect trouble. Trouble? Oh, yes. Yes, there's no doubt of what he'll take your refusal as a personal insult. Oh, dear. And of course, by the code of the West, that calls for a gunfight. Oh, dear, dear. This time with real bullets, not blanks. Dear, dear, dear. I imagine he's a deadly shot. Oh, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear, dear. Oh! Suppose we go pay our respects to your dear, dear friend Buffalo Barney McClure. Oh, dear. Just stay calm now, Carew. Remember, you've got nothing to lose, but your life. It could be a trap, gentlemen. A sinister, diabolical plot of some sort. I will soon find out. Here's his room. Oh, dear. Dr. Gildare, you open the door. Yeah, that's a good idea. Go ahead, Jimmy. Oh, you too, eh, Brutus? All right. Well... Oh, I shuck. You shuck a foot you're doing fine. Only you ought to put your other arm around like this. Why, Buffy, I'm surprised at you. I don't blame you, Parker. Show them I. Dr. Gildare. Well, now, just giving a little lady a lesson on the guitar. She sure does catch on fast. So I noticed. Oh! Buffalo, we brought Dr. Carew up to see you. Well, now that is dirt nice of you, boys. But where's he at? Right here behind me. He's shy, you know. Gone shy. Oh, there ain't no call to feel that way about it. Howdy, Doc. How do you do, Mr. Buffalo? Well, I'd better run along now. We're just a minute now. Don't you go high till it off somewhere? Ordner, I want to shake your hand. Well, all right, if you insist. There. No hard feelings, Doc, huh? About that little joke, mind? Oh, no. Not at all, Mr. Buffalo. It's quite all right. And really, I must pop along now. Now, hold your horses. I was thinking we might have a friend and little game poker to see man our friendship. Poker? Oh, I'm terribly sorry. I only play a little bridge occasionally. Bridge. Doc, that very word makes me sick. It must dumb. Miss Parker, would you do me the favor to reach down inside that guitar and latch on to a deck of chords? No, no, really, Mr. Buffalo. I'll tell you why. Docs, now, don't you worry, Doc. We'll figure out some simple little ease again. Yes, I know. And another thing, Miss Parker, hand me my sex shooter air. Of course, Mr. Buffalo. No, no, no. Don't hurt you, Doc. Only take a couple of minutes. You won't feel a thing. No, please, come on out. No. You see, Doc, you wasn't in no danger. I just using blanks. Never mind, Buffalo. I don't think he hears you. Parker, will you go get those smelling salts again? The intrepid Dr. Carew has just swooned plum away. Turn to the story of Dr. Kildare. Dr. Gillespie. Oh, good morning, Dr. Carew. Well, you look as though a caterpillar had just eaten your favorite gardenia. What's wrong, Carew? I have been made a victim of chicanery. I have been taken in by a card shopper, as I believe the expression is. And you get the blame for it. Buffalo Barney, eh? What was the game? Something called Free Card Monday. It sounded so simple, wouldn't you explain it? Free Card Monday. I thought that went out with high-button shoes. Well, I can assure you that it didn't. How much, Dr. Carew? $261. Wow. Oh, good morning, Parker. You sound like Love's young dream. Dr. Gillespie, Mr. McClure was released in this hospital a couple of hours ago. And I don't ever want to hear his name mentioned again. What happened? His wife met him in a taxi. His wife? It seems that she's a bareback rider with the same Wild West show he's in. And furthermore, she looks it. Ms. Parker, there's a fellow victim of that same scoundrel. May I offer you a cup of coffee, Ms. Sullivan? Well, thank you, Dr. Carew. I heard about that card game. But after all, what he took from me was something more precious than just money. My whole heart and soul. Oh, thank you. Well, Dr. Gillespie, it wouldn't seem that Buffalo Bonnie was quite an operator. I guess we're lucky he didn't put the bite on us. Jimmy, speak for yourself. What? Just before he left this morning, he sold me two tickets to that Wild West show. What's wrong with that? I'd kind of like to see it myself. Well, so would I. But according to the morning paper, the show wound up its New York engagement last night. Here are the story of Dr. Kildare starring Lou Ayers and Lionel Barrymore. This program was written by Les Crutchfield and directed by William P. Russo. Original music was composed and conducted by Walter Schumann. Supporting cast included Virginia Gregg, Ted Osburn, and Barton Yarborough. Dick Joy speaking.