 I had a panic attack at work and it was awful. What is up everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and welcome back to the last video of the week where we are focusing on the topic of anxiety and I'm going to tell you about how I had an anxiety attack at work. And please, please, please do me a favor and share this video because there is a very, very important lesson to be learned here. Now before I jump into this story, I want to say what this next week's topic will be. I made a post over on Instagram and Twitter and on Facebook asking people what would you like me to do next week? Do you want me to talk about relationships or how to be a better person? And I was actually surprised. I thought a lot of people wanted me to talk about relationships as far as the mental health aspect but there was an overwhelming majority of people who want me to make videos about how to be a better person. So those are the videos that will be coming next week. So make sure that you stay tuned for those and if you're not yet, I don't know why you're not, follow me over on social media at the rewired soul on Instagram and Twitter or my Facebook page, the rewired soul so you can get involved and help me make you content to help you out with your mental health. So this story actually goes back about four years or so before I started working at this rehab center and when I was at a company called Text Broker, I've mentioned this before if any of you out there are looking to make some extra money on the side and you're decent and writing, like if you have a high school level of writing, you could freelance write for Text Broker, I still write for them. This is not sponsored at all, but I know a lot of people need to make some extra cash and you can easily do some freelance writing. But anyways, I was working for them. I was a project manager and while I was there, I was taking my medication Lexapro, okay, anti-depressant anti-anxiety medication and this is the only thing that really helped keep my anxiety under control. This is before I started meditating and all that stuff and one of the issues with medication, like we get to a point, well, not all of us, but a lot of us get to a point where we don't want to take medication. We just want to be quote unquote normal. We don't want to have to rely on any medication. One of my biggest issues with taking medication is that I'm a recovering prescription drug addict. You know what I mean? And my goal, my goal is always not to have to take any kind of medication. So like this leads to a lot of thoughts that aren't really all that smart. And I try to tell everybody, do not stop taking your medication without a doctor's advice. And one of the main reasons I say that is because I have had a lot of terrible experience with that. So I was on my medication, Lexapro, and I was taking it, taking it, taking it. And my prescription was running low. I'm like, you know what? I feel fine. I don't really need to refill this. I could just not take my medication anymore, right? And I didn't ask my doctor about it. I didn't talk to my doctor or anything like that. I'm just like, I'm just not going to take this medication anymore. I go to work and my job was very, very easy. I'm laid back. Like I was an account manager, project manager, and like, I just dealt with clients and they're like, I got to sit at a desk all day and everything is just fine at my job. And I'm sitting there at work and it's like early afternoon. And my brain just starts racing like crazy. And my brain would just sort of worrying about things. It was trying to find things to worry about. I could feel my heart beating out of my chest or I'm just sitting out at desk and nothing is happening. It's not like I got a new project. It's not like my boss yelled at me. It's not like I got a phone call or a message. It's not like, you know, a debt collector called me. Nothing happened to trigger this at all. And I just started losing it. And I'm sitting there and I'm sort of freaking out about money. I start freaking out about my son's health. I'm just like, Chris, you have money. Your son is fine, right? I started worrying about all my friends. I started worrying about my job. I started worrying like, am I going to get fired? And I'm like, what is happening? Like, and the logical part of my brain is trying to say, like, Chris, there was nothing wrong, but the physical part of my body, like it did not want any of that and it was just losing it. And I sat there for a while at my job trying to just keep it together. I'm trying to just answer emails, correspond with different clients, as well as my co-workers and my bosses and stuff. And I just couldn't. I couldn't. I was like in this state of panic and everybody else around me is just like working and being fine, and I just have no idea what's going on. And finally, I got to a point where I told my boss, I'm like, yo, I'm not feeling very well. I got to go home. And like, I am not the type of person to leave work. I hardly take sick days or anything like that. And I was just like, I got to go. Now here's the kicker. The first one is I didn't have a car at this point. All I had was a bus pass. OK, the second thing was my doctor is closed on Friday. And guess what day it was? It was a Friday. So not only did I get off my medication without my doctor's opinion, but it happened to be on the day their office is closed. So I have an hour and a half long bus ride home. And meanwhile, I'm calling my doctor's office and I get that answering service and I am just yelling at him. I am screaming. I'm like, you need to talk to my doctor. I need to get this prescription refilled right now. Like I didn't have any extra refills. Like I did this in the worst possible situation. OK, so I'm losing on these people. I'm like, I don't care what you got to do. You find my doctor and you get this damn prescription refilled right now. And like, they're like, sorry, man, there's nothing we can do. Well, relay the message. And if they call you back, they'll call you back and nobody ever called me back. So I went home and I had to deal with this state of panic all weekend long. And I wasn't able to get the prescription refilled until Monday. And I was able to. I can't remember if I went to work or I skipped work or what. But like something I always say is this and it's actually a quote from one of my favorite meditation teachers, Shenzhen Yang, where he says suffering equals pain times resistance. And what that means is pain is going to happen. Pain is inevitable suffering is optional. That whole thing pain is always going to happen. But my pain is multiplied by my resistance, by my stubbornness, by my thickheadedness, by me trying to make, quote, unquote, good decisions when I make terrible ones. You know what I mean? I caused this situation. This was all on me. So like I hope a lot of you realize when I make these videos, I'm really trying to help you avoid some of the pitfalls that I've been through. So when I tell you, like, don't just stop taking your medications. Talk to your doctor first is because I've done every stupid thing you can think of when it comes to your mental health, every single one. So please learn from these mistakes. OK, you don't need to be in the same state of suffering that I was. All right, pretty good lesson. Right. That's why I told you to share this video. Make sure people are taking their medications as prescribed and not to get off of them without a doctor's approval. All right. But anyways, that's all I got for you today. So if you like this video, please give it a thumbs up. And if you are new here, I'm always making videos to help you out with your mental and emotional well-being. Make sure you click that little round subscribe button and a big thank you to everybody supporting me on Patreon. And if you would like to support the channel on Patreon, you can click or tap right there. All right. Thanks so much for watching. Be sure to stay tuned next week to learn how to be a better person. And I'll see you next time.