 Do you want to get the ladies like John Thundercock? Then you need his number one secret, tactical soap, pheromone infused soap from men, proud channel sponsor of 21 Studios. I'm Anthony Dream Johnson and I've proved this soap. Order now to link below. Use coupon code 21C for 10% off now. Thank you for joining us on the 21 Report. My name is George Bruno and I will be your host for about the next 20 minutes or so. We're talking with Socrates today. He was the opening speaker and with a very profound message and we're going to talk to him about his message to what I just found out was not just to men because you said half your audience is women as well. To my mutual astonishment, it actually tends to be women seek out understanding of men. They naturally have an interest in relationships but what they find is that a lot of the mainstream advice women are receiving is faulty, doesn't work and there's an effect to taking some of that information on and so they go looking to other sources and they tend to look for men that at least have a different perspective on kind of relationships and I found myself kind of in the middle ground on some of this like I've been accused of being kind of purple pill or Captain Save a Ho and I think I brought that up earlier and there's some credence to that because I believe the sexes are actually meant for each other and if you're a hardcore red pill guy, you'll sit down and say you're blue pill and blue pill guys think oh my god, you're still red pill so I'm kind of somewhere in between but the reality is is I think biologically we're meant for each other. Actually I don't think I know and because of that I think whatever we do we should be bringing ourselves together and not turning ourselves apart and I think a lot of not necessarily the advice that they give but the effects thereof pull us apart relationship wise and so I think the advice that I give is relevant to both men and women and so you know we kind of talked a little bit about that but yeah I was too was truly amazed that half my leadership were women. That's fantastic and your website is manningupsmart.com what is the name of your book? The book is called The Map, a personal guide to the sexual marketplace and it's based on a previous 21 convention speech in which I laid it out and I said you've got to put this to a book there are too many ideas here and the other element to it is that I just didn't want to have a narration of the speech itself because I wanted to provide more content more in depth and knowledge and kind of fed a lot of that out. The problem though is that having a full life a career plus continuously doing new speeches for the 21 convention and trying to run a blog trying to do a book on top of it you had to kind of pick and choose so the blog itself while it's at manningupsmart.com it's I haven't been able to be real attentive and I need to go back and kind of resurrect some of the ideas and some of the themes there but I've been spending a lot of my focus in on writing the book which will be completed essentially today it'll be for release this Saturday for the house party that we're gonna be having so we'll have a big house party and book lunch tour and be able to have the book out there and hand people the book. How was the book different than other books that talk about sexual marketplace inter-gender relationships? What would be the unique selling proposition if I can put it that way or what makes it different than the entire bookshelf that you see in the Manisphere type of books? Why is this book different and why do people need it in their library? Fundamentally it's graphic in nature so where there's most books are all nothing but text that may have a graphic. The map literally that I create is graphic in nature so you physically can see what we're talking about and analyzing graphically and as an architect I communicate through a large number of medias one of the most important is graphic and we talk about blueprints and designs but we also do specifications which is nothing but text and but we also know for example that a graphic can convey thought, content, tone, visual all sorts of communication cues in a way in which text one so a picture's worth a thousand words so if I can sit down and say you're in the friend zone and you want to be a sexual viable option trying to be more of a friend by going down the wrong axis which is what most people do is just gonna make you a better friend you can't get from where you're at to where you wanna go by doing this unless that's where you wanna go but if you really wanna go over here you need to go this way and if we know that axis and we can define what that is and I clearly articulate that so for example the two most biggest drivers of the sexual marketplace are natural selections, are biological impulses and those factors are known and I break that down into the three major components of anthropology of being survival, seduction and then provision so the physical elements of being survival all the physical traits of being what would make a human survive you know, stature, strength, fitness, health seduction, you have to be able to be a successful sexual being how do you do that? well it's through seduction are you able to give IOWs are you able to receive that are you able to respond socially and appropriately to do that and for men, women's hypergamous nature women's natural sexual biological negative is gonna require men that will pull the trigger that will get sexual that won't be a nice guy and stay a nice guy that they will actually act on their sexual interest the same way men have a similar need okay within the seduction category of we want women who are accessible it's great to be a flirt but at a certain point we want to be sexual with a woman with you and if you're not a woman who wants to be sexual all of a sudden you're dismissed and that lowers the category so you've got that the last one's gonna be provision that's where women, where we're similar the characteristics are very similar so in survival traits for men and women the traits are gonna be very, very the same but for provision it's gonna be very different women want men who are wealthy, powerful, famous and have cultural influence okay now if men we really don't care about those things we actually want young fit and hot okay you know or beauty and so that changes and so it's understanding what makes that up and why you can kinda score yourself and that's consistent with what I call like the swipe left or right correct yes that's right and by the way that's natural selection and at no point are you going on the social selection which are the relationship centrics and so then I evaluate that and say okay what are your relationship skills do you know how to maintain relationships and part of that is what do relationship skills actually do and I actually kinda teach some of that and that's to reduce tension and stabilize things that's essentially what oh you know when we talk about communication being key what does communication do it reduces tension when there is conflict or there's a misunderstanding open communication reduces that conflict and tension reduces violence okay so that's a relationship skills so you know how do you rate yourself on that on a scale to one in ten and then the second one would be what are your relationship management ability do you know how to manage a relationship and so you're taking men out of the emotional zone and making it practical correct intellectual you're giving them words to use they're able to look at the graphic and say I am here but I wanna be here right it's not a guessing game it's not a guessing game and not only that because you can break it out whether it's in scale one to ten or whatever you can then start saying zones is this a fundamental skill is it a basic skill is it an intermediate skill is it an advanced skill somebody at a fundamental level should not be doing advanced skill set the nuances are gonna be lost on them not only that the reality is if you wanna really improve yourself remove the negatives first what are the things keeping you from being normal you know that reminds me Socrates you know the phrase that we that we've been hearing I'd say about the past five years when someone asks another person so how are you and so and so doing and the response is it's complicated it sounds like this book helps people eliminate that response it does and you're able to kind of in what you're saying it's really geared towards guys so you have this very analytical kind of by the numbers kind of and I'm not gonna say it's a formula but at least you have a basis of understanding and by the way you know where I have this sex threshold you know that you have to be above the sexual threshold before women will have sex with you same thing with the relationship threshold you have to be above the relationship threshold those aren't static lines they actually move they fluctuate not only by individual but also on timing context and everything else but if you have a kind of visual concept that you have this map in your head that you can understand that by being here and I wanna be here and this line shifting or if I'm here in the line you know if I'm above the sexual and it shifts now all of a sudden I find myself behind but I haven't done anything and the line shifting up I need to move with it to stay above that I can modulate how to and very much like driving a car where you modulate or you kind of gear that appropriately and so you can do it not only in a macro level but on a micro level and that's actually a separate chapter in the book or section and that reminds me of in business we talk about you can't manage what you can't measure so you have to identify where you are where you wanna be and what direction you're going in correct there's people who operate in relationships for years in the it's complicated zone right so this could take somebody out of that gray cloudy area and help them either move forward or cut it I literally have the key line say never be lost in the sexual marketplace again wow you may make mistakes but you won't be lost you know if you adhere to it the other part I'll also sit down and say is there's more than one route to get to a destination how much you know and the route you take can be complicated and have nuances and a straight line may not be the best solution one of the most common is if a guy's in the friend zone and I locate you in the fuck buddy zone and there's kind of a defined area free sexual without relationship you can go there and most pickup artists will say sell you the opportunity to go from zero to hero kind of the slogan but the problem is that you transcend a certain area of that sexual marketplace and certain people live there and I actually analyze some of that you know if you're going across that in a straight line you're going to be dealing with the dregs of humanity you know people that are low social tolerances low physical appearances and you're going to be spending a tremendous amount of energy doing some very uncomfortable things and getting poor results with low quality people and a lot of guys get very upset with this because they have standards for themselves or they come from a background where they have expectations and a lot of this drives a lot of school shootings to be really honest so you look at it and when men face rejection particularly at a sexual level and not just sexual rejection but sexual identity level there's a tremendous amount of anger and resentment and I've said before that if you can't resolve something appropriately you'll do it inappropriately and we've seen some of that and so when I was giving the talk in Tampa that year there was a recent killing in California at that time and I utilize that as an example as opposed to teaching the same individual to become normal to remove the things that are making and pushing them down into the friend zone to remove that and by the way there's an 8 to 1 ratio on that so if you can remove the negatives it's vastly better than that than adding a positive so you remove the negatives first and all of a sudden you'll find yourself in the normal zone and that's what happened that's what a lot of guys going through the pickup community but then they find a girl and they disappear and so the coaches lose that opportunity they don't ever get them down to the fuck buddy zone which is what both were selling so I have this question for you years ago in the good old days men used to just self-destruct now they destruct others in their grief in their despair hence school shooter incel this type of thing what has made that happen it is a in the light of history it is a recent phenomenon in the past men would just commit suicide either with a bullet or over a period of 20 years you know one whiskey at a time yeah right alcoholism or gambling or any devices devices now they're destroying others' lives why did why have we made that jump what has happened in society and to men profile those men yeah I'll say it but it's not just men and we'll take us take one step further back explain social justice for us what are they doing yes they're assaulting they're damaging yes they're attacking yes they're not just self-destructive correct destructing in society in a whole so I think in part we take a bigger step even back from both men and women and as part of the talk is that in many ways isolation is being promoted as a virtue whether it's MGTOW men going their own way or you know social justice wars with being a strong independent woman they're both advocating isolation and loneliness but we've sat down and enabled it society to say this behavior is okay and where it goes unfettered you start seeing more so if you don't weed the garden you're going to get more weeds and weeds are prolific and when you have a culture that's leaning to sexual identity politics any of that sort of kind of the theoretical philosophical stuff and they promote that and they promote victimhood and by the way it's terribly empowering to be a victim you all of a sudden accorded rights and respect you've never earned yeah okay and when we give license to that there's no difference and I haven't seen anybody who's killed other people you know I'm in particular school shootings that hasn't felt entitled and felt they weren't a victim every one of these shooters were angry they're evening the score somehow and man do they want you to pay and they want you to feel it and look at the choice of targets children like themselves they want you to feel it and there's a reason for that and so in many ways I think that the community should respond to some of this and I think events like this in many ways we know that is preventing a lot of it and we know it not so much that we have school shooters in our midst because you know everybody has that capacity but we do know there's been a number of people who have said look I was suicidal or my life was heading this particular way or you know I can't believe that after coming to an event like this that I went better part of a year and it only occurred to me that I only thought about killing myself once yeah and you're kind of struck and that was never our intent but that's kind of a ramification of men helping and developing themselves and fulfilling these personal voids but the other part is we demand that you have self agency and as a society we're not we're not unfortunately that we're not promoting that we're not saying when you don't that's wrong knock the shit off we actually enable and we showcase these individuals and so I think we're going to see a lot worse you know which is not a positive thing you mentioned a phrase strong independent woman which is should be trademarked yeah as if that's a badge but you never hear men say I'm a strong independent man why is there a disparity between the genders with that why do women say that and why do men not say that I believe it goes back to the battle of the sexes it's positioning perspective and as soon as you say it's about all the sexes there's gonna be winners and losers and it's them and us and it's teaming and it's tribal and I think there's something terribly natural in human species the animal part that's inclined to that and it's not necessarily a societal better thing but we don't sit down and look for the ways in which we're similar and we're compatible and complimentary and when you do that the sexes are brought together but to go back to the strong independent woman we used to demand that and so it was very much me too movement the original me too was I'm strong and independent me too not the sexual assault front so I think there was this element of that I think that they're also following behind the trail of patriarchy rather than truly developing a macriarchy okay if you were that had its own identity and so we are mammals so we learned through behavior by example and it's patterning so it's natural to fall into thinking processes that are already been pre-established and patterned for you and so if you have this element that you're falling behind the patriarchy you're kind of even though you're gonna tear it down but we're gonna replace it with something almost identical or even worse that you have that sort of behavior and so women are trying to become more like men because they valued those traits for so long they identify with some of them are they being rewarded for that? I'm a behavior modification guy and behavior modification rule number one is behavior that gets rewarded gets repeated how is this behavior being rewarded this SJW this some of the newer female thought how is that being rewarded in society because it seems like it's gaining steam if it wasn't being rewarded you wouldn't see it correct wither and die how is it being perpetuated? there's immediate validation you identify with a tribe and you're one not only that you get tremendous respect notoriety me too me too correct so me too isn't just about I've been sexually assaulted it's bigger than that and it's almost a dead giveaway they're telling you like read the card placard that people present they tell you everything you want to know is me too, me too, me too and it's not even just me too it's see me see me, me too I want you know don't ignore me you know and so there's that element to it but it's short-term thinking process you know and it's negative and in today's speech I actually talked about the ramifications of being a strong independent woman when you have a biological clock tick nature doesn't care whether you biologically are infertile and can't help it it's a biological fact or if it's self-induced or society will induce nature doesn't care tell me some things about nature nature doesn't care nature doesn't lie tell me some other things about nature nature will win that and it's gonna sound horrible I was in when I was going through architecture school or it was kind of an ethics course but they were basically teaching us how to be responsible architects and how to mitigate loss and risk associated with how we get sued for building failures and everything else and it became almost religion that the beginning of the lecture at the very end the professor would sit down and say and water will win so he would walk into the room and everybody has a joke and it became kind of this mantra because he was known for doing it that it became a thing is that and water will win and I've just taken the same thing is that nature is persistent and nature doesn't care about you me as human species it's gonna be survival of the fittest and we relay that to a physical propensity okay you have a survival of fittest but if you have a moral and ethical and fitness for society and you end up eradicating self extinguishing your genetic line because you're a strong independent woman you failed to have children in your biological clock won't nature doesn't care mm brilliant yeah and the fittest will survive and that doesn't mean necessarily it's a societal or civilizational best but what's best for the species and what's best for the species is that it propagates do you think we've lowered the net in the basketball game of life have we made it easier to easier for weaker people to win and to do a layup I don't think we've lowered the net I think the threshold for that has been pretty low to begin with I think the people that get scared by it like a lot of the women I know that are strong and independent and a lot of them are close friends their expectation for motherhood and parenthood have been raised so high that I think they have fears in that challenge I know I personally felt that is that my awareness of what it meant to be a good father or a parent I didn't think I had the skills or abilities to do it and the reality is I didn't okay so I kind of knew which path I was on and where that path with head end up and but it was my obligation to do something about that otherwise I was gonna be unfit and so it was my personal challenge to sit down and say where am I weak what do I really want and to come up with my own answers and solutions and create the world that I wanted for myself and part of that was I wanted to be a good parent I wanted to be a good partner and I wanted to be the world's best father for my daughter and there is no doubt that I am and so you look at and go what are the challenges and so I think in many ways that that bar has actually been raised for people who are aware and it's like many things like when you become aware of a subject the more you get into it the more you realize you don't know and more intimidating it becomes so the barrier to entry becomes stiffer and harder and it does not help us that society and culture doesn't advocate for relationships or marriage and families the way it used to and we've lost those supporting institutions and many ways you have to then go back and reconstruct that and if you don't have that that's a tremendous amount of energy to overcome and so I think there's that a lot to that. I've heard some people say I was I knew everything about marriage and family until I had marriage and a family I knew everything about kids until I had kids and then all of a sudden it doesn't matter how educated you are how mature you are how together you are children will always throw you a curve ball. Daily. It's stunning but it's like a lot of things in life you can't sit in isolation and think you know something in an academic sense and I think that's kind of some of the arguments I have with a lot of academics particularly the people that I read the white papers they're not publishing or putting stuff out because their careers very much would be at risk but along those lines is that you have to field test and so when we were talking about kind of a pickup organization is that you just couldn't read the material in keyboard jockey there was actually you had to go out and post and be filled you know go out into the field then post field reports and by the way our layer required you actually be witness doing such so you just couldn't go out and kind of I did this you actually had to go out because what it did is while you think you know how something's going to go in your mind it doesn't play out the same right you know Muhammad Ali says everybody had a you know a plan until they get punched you know in the military we had a plan until first contact and then shit goes to hell and Hampton are you flexible enough and are you skilled enough to handle that situation in context and by the way that there are things that are going to come up that you would never anticipate I mean never anticipate and that develops experience now your your ability then is to combine knowledge and experience and squeeze that into a juice we call wisdom and that that is a whole different challenge you know some of the books that are written for men are only recept are only read by men who are receptive during grief or despair right I certain books by authors that we both know would be meaningless to some people whose lives seem to be going okay only when crap hits the fan then you want to hand someone a certain book it sounds like your book is appropriate for anybody at any stage male or female and it sounds like somebody is going to everybody's going to get something out of this book it will be fair I completely agree we learn through trauma and trauma drives behavior I have no expectation that somebody who has a great relationship is going to find interest in the material they're just not because they're getting it right but there are distinct pain points and knowing that there are three major categories of people that I was looking towards so the people that are in the friend zone those people that are that are sexually viable in the fuck buddy zone but below the relationship threshold that they have a unique pain point the other is and it's going to be strange when people who are average they have a distinct pain point and they suffer from being average there's nothing remarkable about them they're transferable they're swappable and nobody's going to invest in that nobody really wants that they want more for themselves but they haven't put their work in and that is a pain point too and so I think that it's a broad enough book it probably could have been three different chapters or three different books under itself and had been viable but I kind of joke that I should have had a breakup recovery book as my first one because that would have been a best seller and then you go from there I kind of did that with my blog structure I start with the demise of a relationship and what do you do it's a relationship autopsy and then you kind of do assessments and everything else before you do all the relationship stuff and so there was a progression in my writing on that but this particular book it does cover a large spectrum of multiple people but I think people who are in healthy relationships that want to improve them or fine tune them sharpening the acts as it were or sharpening the saw is you're gonna make better headway by having a sharp tool and the way you do that is pick up something that you're interested in that's relevant to your life and I think relationships are very relevant to people. One last thing the people that are watching this right now have needs there's someone out there who's watching this right now and their life need they need something that's gonna flip a switch tell that one person who's watching this that one nugget that could possibly change his life he's watching this he's hoping that he can just grab onto one thing he has no hope he's been out there he's failed what would you tell that man right there? I would tell you right now you know exactly where you're at you know the path you're on and you know the path and where it's gonna end up and there is a remarkable difference between where you are gonna end up and where in the back of your mind where the hero that you are your inner hero that not the Marvel comic book character hero but the hero that you could be what path that individual will do what things that individual will do I would sit down and say drop on and lean towards being that individual the greater separation between who you are and your inner hero that behavior difference the greater separation the greater failure and lost potential of your life if you're not achieving you're not knowing you know happy with where you're at if you lean into your inner hero you will make a dramatic change in your life in a direction that you want that you can control that is completely available right now and that's a change of perspective I just I got goosebumps when you said the phrase inner hero that's talking to somebody right now right now someone is their hands are getting sweaty and they're writing that down that's a powerful phrase yeah and let's talk about that sweat you know that anxiety and that fear that is a immense human natural reaction but it's a reaction courage is what you do in despite of that fear and courage requires courage demands rational thinking that's the cerebral cortex responding not the mammalian or the limbic brain you know the animal brain of fight or flight you know and so to be able to have command of that and realize lean into that fear and anxiety and say my hero can get through this okay and that that'll change your world Socrates from manningupsmart.com his book is coming out real soon I look forward to it I think you'll benefit from it this is George Bruno from the 21 report