 How do we encourage vulnerability from other people? Because that is such a difficult place to be when you're like, okay, now I know I need to be vulnerable. I know I need to get this other person vulnerable. How do I do this if I want to connect with them? Well, this comes back to one of the basic principles that we always talk about in class, which is stronger frame leads the weaker one. And so if we expect or want other people to be vulnerable around us, then we're going to have to be vulnerable ourselves. And that is a difficult thing. How do you get comfortable with being vulnerable when you run the risk of having that vulnerability used against you? Yeah, I mean, I liken this to the metaphor of meeting someone, opening a door, staring into the dark abyss, and turning them and saying, okay, you go first. Tell me if it's safe. Who is going to say, yeah, sure. I mean, a stranger is not going to do that. So it takes you walking through that door, walking into the abyss to allow the other person to go, you know what, this is the right path for me. There's that, which is the leading. So going in first, shining the flash around saying it's okay. And then the other thing is, I love how language plays a role in your subconscious and how you view things. So if you take shots or cast judgment on other people for being vulnerable or chasing their dreams or doing this, that is going to play a role in the people around you seeing that and how comfortable they're going to be to open up. It's a hypocritical thing. So you can't expect those around you to be open and then take shots at other people. And this is something that always comes around and we, I see it all the time. If you're friends with somebody or you have somebody in your social circle who, who is taking shots at somebody else and as long as it's not you or it's quite entertaining to watch them do it and you're like, well, as long as it's not me, I'm fine with that blah, blah, blah. Guess what? It's always going to come to you. It's always going to come. It's only a matter of time. And so I just want, I want you thinking about that and moving forward to be, to be careful of that, not for you to watch out for that, that you yourself are not casting disparaging remarks against other people who are being vulnerable. Right. Working through their own insecure. Because it's playing a role in those who are around you and their vulnerability. And their perception of your comfort level. Right. If all you're doing is taking shots at other people's vulnerability, then I'm certainly not going to feel comfortable being vulnerable around you. I'm going to pull back. I'm going to stop sharing things. The other thing to keep in mind here, and we, we see this constantly, the second someone takes the lead and starts showcasing a little vulnerability, the other person goes, great, let me tell you all my issues. That seems insignificant. Now let me tell you all mine and they just grab that spotlight back. And it's, it's instinctual. We've all felt it like, great, this person's being vulnerable. Now I can finally get some things off my chest that I haven't been able to talk to other people about. And what we're talking about here is creating the space for that to happen. And I can't tell you how many conversations we've been in where we're talking to someone for the first time and we're just explaining a little bit of our frustration with something. And then immediately we get bombarded with every struggle that they've been going on over the last three, four weeks. Well, and here's how this works. People are going out, they're putting their best perfect person out there trying to collect attention, approval and accept, acceptance for themselves by throwing out the most amazing, perfect lifestyle. Now when somebody comes along, bucks the trend and it's able to be vulnerable. And all of a sudden that is what's getting attention, approval, acceptance. So that the script has been flipped. And now rather than this, I have to do this. And it always takes one strong person who is comfortable with themselves into being vulnerable that allows another person around them to feel good that somebody else is going through the same thing they are. So now they've put a platform for themselves to connect with each other. And when we don't follow this path of light, medium, heavy disclosure, what we're doing is we're actually breaking that connection. We're pushing other people to a place where they no longer feel comfortable with any connection with us. Now what we can do here to evoke and encourage vulnerability from other people is much like the experiment we started today's discussion with. Stop focusing on the light factual questions, the small talky BS questions that no one cares about. You don't actually care about someone's birthplace. You don't actually care about someone's workplace. And focus on the emotional questions, those feelings, those aspirations, those goals, those hopes that the person is working towards or those fears, worries and concerns that they're having working through those. And when we can cultivate a genuine interest, not the fake, okay, let me just collect some information and data interest, we can inspire people to be vulnerable around us.