 Have you invested in United States savings bonds this week? Ladies and gentlemen, this is your host, Kenny Delmar, introducing Guest Star, one in a series of programs produced and transcribed in New York and Hollywood, and presented by this station and United States savings bonds as a public service. Our guests for this edition, Bing Crosby and Bob Hope. First, though, here's vocal activity by the three dollars. Dollars, that is, and the savings bonds orchestra under the direction of Jennifer Gates. Remember after you're gone? Several years, ladies and gentlemen, America's fastest talking toothpaste salesman and that grown-up extraordinaire with the open neck shirt have been tramping all over the screens of America's motion picture emporiums. Up one road and down another. They have merrily trudged their ways from Morocco to Zanzibar. So it was inevitable they would sooner or later visit the savings bonds guest star show and win their way down the road to security. And here they are, Bob Hope and Bing Crosby. Saving Bond Hope and Crosby. Telling you if you buy bonds now and put them away, you'll have more than a barrel around you on income tax day. Another voice you just heard, ladies and gentlemen, is my senior partner in the road pictures and a man who turned each of the roads into a road to security. The fabulous flab himself, Mr. Crosby. Hello to you, Swizzle Snouts. It seems to me if my thinking hasn't gone awry, you also have developed a remarkable facility for turning those road romings into a colossal cache of kabach. What did you do with all the green stuff? Man, you must be kidding. This is a savings bond show. What else could a man do with his lettuce, huh? Shine the light on me, will you, sir? Well, I stuck it right square in the center. The best bunch of U.S. savings bonds I could find, and I'm keeping it there. Right, boy. Brother, you are solid, Buster. Really solid. Yes, sir. All callow, but plenty solid. That's all that you should talk about building jackpots. Yes, I'm not kidding my pot, Jack. Enough, enough. Is it okay with you if I put in my serious two cents worth here? If you put in two cents, it'll be plenty serious. Whatever I'm with you, you know, you make me pay through the nose. Well, that's where you keep your nickels, isn't it? Well, it's better than my money bill. I catch cold every time I undress to pay the streetcar fare. But, uh... Stopping the flattery, Bob. You are a grand-boy. You are a grand-grand-boy, and I want you to know that you can trust me just as far as I can trust you. Thanks, and being you can trust me just as far as I can trust you. Bring out the fam's mother that's smoking the ham tonight. What do you mean, ham? I'll have you know I'm a great leading man. The only time you're leading, boy, is when it's payday at Paramount. I know the shortcuts. That's just your excuse for going through the ladies' dressing room. You're just mad because I got a peek at your bloomers. You know, of course, old man, about my latest cinema effort. It's called my favorite brunette. My favorite brunette? Yup. Huh? Yup. Your life story, huh? He just can't grow old gracefully. He's got to get mean, too. But what love scenes I did, whenever I kissed Dottie LaMoure, she just stood there speechless. Well, naturally, took her quite a while to get the knots out of her pucker. She doesn't have to lump the alum. Say, speaking of the manly art of loving, did you get a load of how I made celluloid really blister when I laid one on the luscious lips of LaLamoure on the road to Rio? Have you ever seen lips operate like that? Not since the last time I gave Lassie a sticky tootsie roll. Are you two still sharing dressing rooms together? No, Robin. I'm really surprised that Dottie still consents to make pictures with you. The way you handle her in those so-called romantic interludes. Wait a minute. I'll have you know my love scenes are very tender. Tender? I'll come every time then you get ready to shoot a kissing scene in the director holler's lights, camera, muzzles. Can I help you? She's my favorite kind of red heart. I really hope I can never say enough about your acting. That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me, pops. Why can't you say enough about my acting? Ladies present, you know? Just when I thought you were sincere. Just when I thought the real Crosby. Crosby the man was at last bearing his soul. What a gruesome sight. Speaking of gruesome sight. Now, don't talk to me about gruesome sight. Steady. How about the way you were driving the ball at the new driving range? I was flying it out there. Lakeside Country Club. A new range? A Mallon's Hacienda. I thought I had the rubber jumping pretty good. In front of Olin Dutra, your golf pro. Embarrassing, mightily embarrassing. Well, I have nothing to be embarrassed about. It's just like you. You know, just the kind of things you do. You can't beat a guy that greases his ball before each drive. Oh, no, wait a minute. I didn't grease my ball. I just rubbed a little yeast on it, so it rise faster. Maybe you'd improve your game if you brought along a few new golf balls. Oh, you think that would help? Sure. After all, how far can you drive a stork egg? Why, you cheap skates, you didn't even tip the caddy who carried your bag. Well, at least I had a bag. I was out of the affair walking around with those three wood clubs and a five-iron sticking out of the sag in your bag. Well, seriously, Bing, I always bend over backwards to be fair in a game of golf. Now answer me this. What is it, Bob? Did I ever cough while you were putting? No. You see, what did I tell you? You were too busy drawing a chocolate from your ball to the cup. I didn't want to dig the furrow in the wrong place. Understandably. Say my game has improved. Have you noticed what I've been going around in lately? Yes. Can't you afford a regular suit? We should talk about clothes. Your suit looks like a plaid rainbow. You look like a good team. Every rainbow has to have a pipe. Well, be that as it may, gentlemen. What say we call a momentary halt to the verbal fisticuffs and snuggle a bit of music into the scene? Oh, sounds fine. Now everybody open a bottle of lime cola, turn up your radio. Yes, and you know what kind. And while you're counting your savings, Bob, Dennis Agay on the orchestra entertains with the bat. Yeah, but you know how I'm convinced there's only one real road and that's the road to peace and security. Know what you mean. Hope it's the road that leads to financial security and the tickets? The tickets are United States savings bonds. Yeah, and Bing, there's an easy way to put it away. Get this, boys. Always looking for the easy way. Yes, sir. When it comes to buying a big hunk of security, I'm always looking for the easy way. Just what is this easy way? The easiest way I know of is just salting it away a bit at a time and you don't miss it that way. Sounds logical. Tell me all about it. Well, it all works out something like this. In case you haven't guessed it, I'm talking about United States savings bonds. Yes, it's rubbing. I'm away ahead of you. You are? Yes, sir. These United States savings bonds are a great buy. The best. You know that for every three bucks you put in a bond, you get back four. And for every $75 invested, you get back a hundred. And for every 300, you'll be counting 400 in no time. It's a real parlay. Hope your arithmetic is as good as it is if you've gone through the fifth grade all the way. But seriously, folks, if you buy them now, they'll pay off just about the time that those youngsters are ready for college. There speaks the voice of experience. But you were going to tell about the easy way to buy bonds? Well, all you have to do is tell the man at the office to take the money out of your weekly paycheck. I can't do that, Bob. Why not? I'm being paid off in radio. Seriously, though, folks, this payroll plan for the purchase of the United States savings bond is a wonderful idea. And the easy way to save is to use a systematic plan, the payroll savings plan. Why don't you buy at least one United States savings bond every month? It's the world's best and safest investment. Now that you've said your piece, Bob, I'd like to add a few thoughts. Folks, some people may not think that saving something for their old age is important. But it is. It's terribly important. Folks, if Crosby is saving money for his old age, that's good enough for me. So for your own good, the good of your family and loved ones, buy your shares and happiness in the years to come. Invest in your country by investing in the United States savings bond. And you're on the real road to security. She didn't say, say, she didn't say, go. She ought to do that. He's fired her. Do his best to sign her there. So what did she do? I leave it to you. She did just what you do to her. I'll go get my these and thoseies. And the way we'll go do. We can have the Pullman porter turn the lights down low. Off to the follow. This is your host, Kenny Delmar, signing off for Guest Star, one of a series of programs presented by this station, and United States savings bonds as a public service produced and transcribed in New York and Hollywood. I want to thank Bob Hope and Bing Crosby for being with us. Until next we meet, here's a question to remember. Have you invested in United States savings bonds this week? There are goodbye. Goodbye, that is.