 There's a Snape for us. Somewhere a Snape for us. Always. Welcome back to our Stupid Reactions. You idiot, some Corbin. What does he say? Open your books to page. How do you not remember that one? I know. It's the most famous. It's the most famous. He comes in, pop, pop, pop, pop. Turns. Open to page. Turn to page. Oh crap. 300 and 94. That's a pretty hundred and 94. I wish I could do Alan Rickman's voice. What a voice. A few people can. No, I've heard. I think Benedict Cumberbatch actually is pretty close. It is pretty good. Instagram and Twitter. Yeah. Do you see content? You know all that stuff. What are we doing, Corbin? Virdas. Oh, cool. This is one of the things he did a little while ago. It's called Bollywood Drugs Journalism in India. Right on. Go for it, man. Go for it. Obviously, we love Virdas. He's Dost, of ours. Yes, 100%. We're gonna call him Dost. Thanks to Pankaj for honoring us with that. We know what that means now. But yeah, this, after we did one, another stand to the comedian who talked about Bollywood and drugs. Yeah, recently. Yeah. And then people told us, you got to watch Virdas. Well, yeah, because he'll be, he did this just in, I believe it was October. So it was actually shortly after probably we talked to him. Yeah. He's cut from the same cloth as my, like my favorite comedian right now is Dave Chappelle, who is just 100% pure, honest. He's always been. Brutality. Yeah. Honest brutality. But yes, this should be good. Here we go. Bollywood is on drugs, guys. This is the number one issue plaguing India, I think. Forget the economy. Forget the GDP. Yeah, nothing else matters, man. Issue that is fucking plaguing our country right now. Bollywood is on drugs. I love you saying that with the Marley shirt. Fuck yes, Bollywood is smoking weed. You think Gol Maal gets written sober? You know, Gogo Aghan is without weed. It's a tourism video for Kerala. There's lots of money writing on you. Your destiny changes every Friday. People analyze your every choice, your every appearance. There's two ways to go with that. Either you can develop a very thick skin and that only makes you jaded over time. Or you can pretend like it doesn't exist. Ignoring that isolates you over the time. Or at the end of each day, you can roll a flat one or whatever. Just roll the flat shirt and you'll feel better. I'm not saying that drugs help you succeed. I'm saying the real weed helps you deal with the failure and it's great life. Success. That's all I'm saying. If you smoke a giant one at the end of each day, you don't care if Anupama Chopra gave you a pet. You already have the best review. You give me nice reviews sometimes. Because their bad reviews are really bad. And they can be pitchy to fucking people. This Netflix show, Masaba Masaba. You guys see it yet? I haven't seen it but I assume it's about Masaba's life. Right? And the kind of life she leads. When people get together and have brunch and talk about chiffon. I don't know. Talk about chiffon. The review of a film from Banker wrote a review. So Rahul's something and the tagline was, Nina Gupta is a much better actress. They should have made the show Nina Nina. And I was like, what a bitchy, pitch-act person thing to do, man. You know, pitch-act people. India is full of these people. Pitch-act people. Well, no matter if they like something or they don't like something. These are pitch-act people. This guy probably goes to Batman begins and he's like, Michael King is the better actor. They should have called it Alfred 15 years. He probably goes to Black Panther and he's like, not all panthers are black. This is such a good fact. Not all panthers are black. And that demoralizes some people. Because you know, don't believe what he was asked already. They don't read reviews. All right? 90% of actors read every review. And the other 2% don't know how to read. That's why they look at the stars. That's basically a visual review for them. That is good. Listen, Deepika Padukone is tall enough, humble enough, hard-working enough, elegant enough and tall enough way she has a joint in her mouth. It doesn't affect my life in any way, shape or form. We operate in different climate. We have different weather. She's playing puff-puck-puss with drones. Deepika Padukone is smoking weed. Let us, let us believe Singh. Baby, you look great today. If she's so much, she'll be like, that's a curtain runny. I'm going to talk about Sushant Singh Rajput. Can I? Because it's not about justice for Sushant anymore. Is it? We got played for 3 months. You know why Sushant Singh Rajput had a tough time in Bollywood because he was smart? That's why. That boy was smart. And the people with power in Bollywood want you to make them feel like they're the smartest people in the room. They want you to make them feel like the shit they create is genius to you. Talk. The boy who knew astrophysics, who understood the universe, who understood they're doing, doesn't change the world. That there are things outside of Bollywood. That's why he had a tough time. And he was smart enough, I think, where if somebody was slipping him drugs, he would know. He would ask a question, at least one question he would ask. He'd be like, hey baby, every time we have Kichuri on Monday, how come I wake up on Thursday? And he had so much fame, man. It's tough to have that level of fame it is. Like I would minus you level of fame. Like yeah, Bollywood fame. My fame is very chill. Like my fame, I'm like a double decker bus. That's it. If you saw me on the street, you'd be like, huh, I know what that is. Give a fuck, but I don't. I'm going to tell you a Bollywood story. You want to hear my Bollywood story? Yeah. My first film was a film by the name of Namaste, London. Some of you may not remember that film. I was in that film. I had three liners. That is 90% of Bollywood. It's not just hero and heroine in camera. It's people who have three liners and dreams in their hearts who are trying to get to four liners. Same with Hollywood. And they think that line is going to change their life. I was on a terrace in Hyderabad. This is the scene. Rishi Pappu, Katrina Kaer, Nadia Singh, me and another junior artist playing my mother. Rishi Pappu res in Umbrella over him. Katrina Kaer, Umbrella over her. Nadia Singh, Umbrella over her. Me and the other junior artist, Umbrella less. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Baking in the sun. Yeah. The only two sweaty people in this beautiful Bollywood scene. We look like two heroine addicts at Sunday brunch. I don't know if the two people who look like they are, all the drugs are not actually from Bollywood. I have my first line. I have rehearsed my first line for months. All right. I do my first line. It goes well. Unperspected room number three. Remember? Very good. I do my first line. It goes well. Rishi Pappu does his line. It goes well. Katrina Kaer looks at me dead in the eye and goes, Papalish to past, past, past, past, past, past, past, past, past, past. It was only a career. She didn't speak in the totally yet. So she's to mouth dialogues and then dub them later herself with a quote. Oh, I didn't know that shit. Oh. So I was just in the scene looking at her like, am I high? No joke. Because that wasn't Hindi. That wasn't English. I don't speak Dothraki. But for hours and hours and hours, my mother and I are changing shades. We are heading to a Stollywood with every passing hour. And at the end of it, this is my close up and everybody gets up to me. Just leaving me alone with that one assistant director who looks like he hates his parents, which is all assistant head. Nobody signs up for that job after a happy childhood. And as he's leaving, you know, I consider myself not starstruck. You know, I'm pretty cool around famous people. Rishi Kapoor all of a sudden grabbed my hand and said, son, what is your name? And as he grabbed my hand, I swear to God, in my mind, I don't... I'm sure it's a Rishi reference, yeah. And I was like, so my name is Devdas. And he said, Devdas, you are a fantastic actor. He must promise me no matter what happens. That's great. And I said, yes. He created a pivotal moment for me and he knew he was doing it. I confronted with him. I did two other films with him. The last time we worked together, he was my father. I was his son. And he said, I knew that. I do that for actors all the time. Great. That's awesome. It was like a long time. It was one of the best days of my life. I got back to my hotel room. Do you know the first thing I did? Drugs, guys. I did it. You have 900% enthusiasm, 0% expectations. I knew a long time ago this market wouldn't understand me. And so I needed to understand me and figure out how to use myself because they are not. And I'm not telling you about my struggle. By the way, shut the fuck up about your struggle and other people's struggle as well. If you think about your struggle, you made it. It's fine. You're done. Right. If there are eggplant emojis in your life, you have a right. And to you, the public, I say, why do you need your Bollywood stars to struggle? What is it? It's overrated struggle. It really is. Have you seen people who work really, really hard? They're ugly. Shagging takes a toll, man. You want your Bollywood stars to be fresh? They look like they just came out of the ball to be launched. Like a new rocket is launched. They launched new things. You never see NASA like, yeah, we're going to launch this fear to any one more day into space. No. People work hard, look like shit. It takes a toll. Our Prime Minister is the hardest working man in India right now. Have you seen him recently? He's just sitting there with birdseed. Even the peacock is a lot of no man. This guy's going through something right now. I'm just saying, his appearance has changed. Has he not in the pandemic? I have to say, man, I've never seen a Hindu man look more like Santa Claus in my life. Every time he comes out, he's like, I'm like, I did not hear that in my on the list. You watch that, you know, the news anchor by our favorite Mr. Goswami, should we talk about him? I never have, but I think today finally we need to, because he just defies every rule of physics I ever learned in school. I was always taught that light travels faster than the speed of sound. Fuck it, every of Goswami's voice travels faster than the speed of light. It leaves your television and enters your ears to prepare your eyes for the face we're about to see. You're such a picture of megalomania gone wrong. Can we agree on that, yeah? I mean, I wonder things. I'm like, you think he screams his own name in bed? Because the light was him, by the way. You think he screams his own name in bed? Sitting in bed? I sympathize with the fucking people who work for Adna Goswami. I really do. That poor girl in the car who's magnetic, she's like, Deepika, actually, she caught up to him. Deepika rolled her window down, she's like, Deepika, you have any drugs? I need it. I walk to her magnet. Magnet is over the ship. Why? But why? Why is the news a circus right now? Because it's competition, it's not news. You think Adna Goswami is competing with like NDTV in times now? No, he's not. He's competing with Netflix and Amazon. Yeah. He knows that you have one device and two eyeballs and he wants them at 9 p.m. So he's going to be between more fantasy and more fiction. Same with all the other girls' organizations. So then he can get that device. If you want to stop this kind of journalism, stop watching. Don't heckle him on a flight. He loves that. All right, don't beat about him. He loves that too. Take away his eyeballs like the government took away his real ones. That's how you change this. And I still have respect for Adna Goswami. The people that don't respect her don't want to be Adna Goswami. You recognize that side of journalism was working and then started to do that side of journalism. Like that lady on times now, you know the one who, oh God, the one who looks like she scares everyone at the PTA meeting. Navika, right? You just feel like she's at the PTA meeting and they're like, okay, Christ, it's deciding. She's like, oh, I'm sorry. They're like, Navika, we're just deciding. We were playing Tambola at the Diwali Mula. So they should have no Tambola. They should have the tukde tukde gang. It's a wonderful, fictitious notion. A group of people whose only job is to divide India for their own benefit. Who pays that to the government? Who went to the government? They're like, sir, I have idea. We will convince the public that there is a group of people who want to divide India and keep us divided for their own benefit. Yeah, that's us. No, sir, but we will convince them that us is they. And they is doing that to them, while us can do we. You're such a bodyguard. What happened? I don't know, man. Sometimes I feel like, you know, the only person who has a right is God, you know. I saw the destruction of our office. Did you see the idea? I thought it was wrong. Did you think it was wrong? Most definitely wrong. You know, but that wasn't the full picture. Because if you saw her office being destroyed and you zoomed out the office, it was just an office in Bandra. And if you zoomed out a little bit more, Bandra was just an area of Mumbai. And if you zoomed out a little bit more, you saw the full Mumbai skyline. In some way India was the destruction of her office. And on top of one of those big tall buildings stood our own superhero, Krish. Krish saw. God, you and I both saw. And our superhero was going to do something about that. But he thought to himself, he's like, you know, I'm going to skip this one. Because I think justice has already been said. So yes, it's a distraction. Yes, it's to turn you away from the economy. Yes, it's all dramatic. And yes, it's all ridiculous. And yes, Bollywood is on drugs, but you're watching this shit. So are you. Awesome. I love him. He's so good. He has his massive set of balls. And I yes, I love what's called a loose rant. Yeah, it was a loose rant. Yeah, thank you. Sorry, I was looking at his notes. He didn't even have his set memorized. I bet because I know he has a new standup coming. And so he's probably trying. He was trying it out. He was trying some of it out. He's got, man, that's brave. One, especially the talk about Sushant. That's that's a very touchy subject for a lot of people, but he spoke a lot of truth to that. Yeah, as well. And then the whole Topeka thing, when people going after her for smoking weed and all that kind of stuff. But he's so smart about all of it because he makes you laugh, but he also makes you think. Yeah, it's and it's a wonderful style of humor. And I always admired it about. Yeah, he applies logic and principles of good rhetoric to what he says. And when he gets you to laugh, he gets you to agree with it. It's very smart. And yeah, that's my favorite thing about him. Like my favorite thing about Dave Chappelle, my favorite thing about Hedda Gabler. These are comedians who are just they're like they're artists because they're coming from the core of who they are. They're not compromising who they are. They're willing to grow. They're willing to change. And they're willing to just say it like it is. And yeah. Also, I love that story about Rishi. That makes me laugh. Even though we thought he was actually really, really good. He's probably a favorite part of Kapoor and Sons, right? Yeah. He was we thought he was really good now. And we know he's like a massive legend. Legend star been around for decades. Right. I love that. Yeah. That's what you should aspire to be when you make it. Is I who said it? What was it? I don't know if it was an Indian artist or if it was a actor here in Hollywood that said, it's my job now to extend a hand. Oh, yeah. I don't remember who it was that said that. But like you at that level, you're not nervous anymore. You know what's going on. You've been on hundreds of sets. You know what's going on. But you know the person acting for the first time opposite next to you, a legend and other legends. He's extremely nervous and so excited about this opportunity. And to extend a hand like that. And just to say something as simple as you did a great job. And you remember that for the rest of his life. And did you notice he said they went to his close up and everybody else left. But Rishi stayed and watched him work. And it not, I'm not trying to make this about me. It reminded me of something that someone did similarly. And I was in Veerdas' position when I did Oh God Book 2. George Burns at the time was legend, right? And it's his film. He's not, all he has in that scene is one shot sitting at the back of the room where he's sitting like this and they cut to him in the middle of my monologue because he is, he's playing God. He's making me change my mind in mid monologue. That's the only reason Mr. Burns was there. But as they're filming my monologue, I look to my left and I see George Burns sitting in the chair watching me do my scene. Like why isn't he in his trailer? So I do my monologue and I just naturally look over to him immediately like because I knew he was watching me. And this is what he does to a 10 year old kid. And I'm now 51 telling you the story about George Burns just taking the time to do this to me and to sit and watch me do my monologue. It takes nothing for them to do that. Like one, it takes nothing to be a good person. Right. Like that's just basic human decency. And I feel, but it's unfortunate a lot of stars. Forget that. Especially if they've been in the industry a long time which George Burns at that time was already in his 80s. Like Rishi, he's been around since what, the 60s? Yeah. So like they're like, okay, I'm down. George Burns had a 60 year career in the industry at that point. Watching a 10 year old and he sits and watch. Yeah, it's wonderful when they turn out to be good people and they want others to succeed. And that's a really good takeaway from this because as much as people have been talking about the drugs in Bollywood, the reality is that when you get to certain levels in Hollywood for as much as you hear about the crap, there's a lot of really good people in Hollywood. Yeah. There really are a lot of people in Hollywood. There really are. That was great. Yeah. Obviously always send us more beer dots. More beer dots. Stand up that we can react to down below.