 Many people who get diagnosed with borderline personality disorder end up denying their diagnosis or just don't talk about it all together. And why is that? That's exactly what we're going to be talking about in this video because it's the last day of Mental Health Awareness Month. What is up everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul where we talk about the problem but focus on the solution and if you're new to my channel what I like to do typically I look at different topics going on in the YouTube community or pop culture and try to see what lessons we can learn from them but I'm very big on mental health as well. So if you're into that stuff make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell and while you're at it make sure you're following me over on Instagram and Twitter at the Rewired Soul so I can interact with all of you beautiful people out there I make announcements and all sorts of other cool stuff alright. But anyways this this video this idea for this video has been in my head for a while. I was recently reading a book called The Buddha and the Borderline. If any of you are interested in borderline personality disorder or if you've been diagnosed with borderline personality disorder you want an excellent book that goes through this young woman's journey of being diagnosed as well as her recovery I cannot recommend this book enough it'll be linked down in the description below but anyways one of the parts that stuck out to me was how she was talking about you know her interactions with people and other people who were diagnosed and rejected that diagnosis alright. So before I move forward full disclaimer for those of you who don't know me no I'm not a licensed therapist or psychologist I am just very nerdy when it comes to mental health and psychology and all those other things so I like to put my knowledge out here on YouTube to hopefully educate some people and maybe to help you understand your disorder a little bit more or it'll help you understand somebody else who is struggling with this disorder alright. So first question is what is borderline personality disorder alright you might have heard of it but maybe you don't know the symptoms so here is a little summary of the symptoms as stated in the diagnostic and statistical manual if you don't know what that is the DSM-5 basically that is the the guidelines that medical professionals mental health professionals use to see what your diagnosis might be now this isn't like a 1000% for sure thing when they diagnose you but it gives them kind of an idea of what you're struggling with mentally so they can offer you the best treatment possible and take it out I actually got my copy right here all right so I'm gonna go through these real quick all right one frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment two a pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships characterized by alternating between extremes of ideolation and devaluation three identity disturbance markedly and persistently unstable self-image or sense of self four impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging this can include spending money sex substance abuse reckless driving binge eating etc five recurrent suicidal behavior gestures or threats or self-mutilating behavior six effective instability due to a marked reactivity of mood seven chronic feelings of emptiness eight inappropriate intense anger or difficulty controlling anger nine transient stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative symptoms all right so these are the symptoms and if you're somebody who struggles with this or you know somebody who does like one of the main main main symptoms of this is emotional dysregulation all right I often think about it like on a scale like if you have zero in the middle and then you got plus 10 and minus 10 most people they'll waver between like you know one to five right like you know you might get like really angry but that's like a five but for people struggling with borderline personality disorder that anger might be like furious you see what I mean or like not just getting happy but really excited or not just feeling like kind of sad it's depressed not feeling nervous it's anxious right and when you combine that with like fear of abandonment and everything like that so why do people deny or reject this diagnosis well something that was brought up in the book and I've seen this happen many many many times like when I was working at the drug and alcohol rehab center for a little over three years I dealt with many clients who had borderline personality disorders and one of the main reasons was because they're their family and friends there are a lot of misconceptions and myths about borderline personality disorder like one of them one of the biggest ones is that those people are extremely manipulative right and the thing is it is not intentional okay like the manipulation is not intentional like their fear of abandonment like it said in the DSM it's real or imagined so that person might do anything they can to keep you around because they are lacking this emotional control you see what I'm being so it is not always intentional and that's one of the things like there's such a stigma around it those people some people see that and I think that is intentional but most people who struggle from my experience that I've met who struggle with borderline personality disorder they hate that they hate that they do that they hate that there's a self sabotage or these um anger outbursts and things like that but the other thing that I uh ran into a lot when talking with clients who struggle with borderline personality disorder was a lot of therapists and even psychiatrists didn't want to work with them all right like I remember working at a treatment center and people would be like oh Chris like here like do you want to work with them like I don't like working with people with BPD and I just never really minded I haven't had any I don't know my threshold is probably pretty high but I haven't had any like crazy experiences you know what I mean but when I would see like therapists and stuff saying they didn't want to work with somebody I'm like huh right but I think in that book the Buddha and the borderline they when they discussed it like it was talking about like how she like when she went to tell her mom right she went to tell her mom how she was diagnosed she was finally diagnosed with borderline personality disorder like she was misdiagnosed with like depression anxiety bipolar bipolar and borderline personality disorder sometimes those get misdiagnosed but she goes and tells her mom their mom's like oh no no no no no no you don't have that you do not have borderline personality disorder borderline personality disorder is for crazy people right so that can make a person feel very very insecure right especially when people classify people with BPD as crazy you know what I mean so it's quite common for people to deny or reject their diagnosis now I've made a video in the past I know Katie Morton who is an actual licensed marriage and family therapist here on the platform she has a video about the differences between CPTSD and borderline personality disorder but they are very very similar especially because many people who get diagnosed with borderline personality disorder had some type of childhood trauma all right but here's the thing here's the thing there's my personal view my personal opinion on it based on people I've met who have borderline personality disorder and are working on overcoming it or they are in recovery and it's this once you accept this diagnosis like the whole reason this book exists is because once they can kind of figure out what your diagnosis is now you can begin treatment so one of the best therapies one of the best therapies for borderline personality disorder is something called dialectical behavior therapy all right DBT for short now traditional DBT like there are like groups like you do like I can't remember if it's like a six to eight week kind of group slash course right and you learn a bunch of different techniques for managing your emotion right and then you're surrounded with other people like if you're interested in learning more about dialectical behavioral therapy the woman in that book she went through DBT all right but DBT a lot of the reason is called the Buddha and the borderlines because DBT a lot of it is based off of mindfulness which comes from Buddhist philosophy all right mindfulness is something that I've been practicing for probably about five or six years now which has really helped me regulate my emotions and things like that so I have reaped the benefits myself because I used to have a lot of problems with emotional regulation all right because it helps you stop and have that pause button a lot of people who struggle with BPD have this in these impulsive behaviors and they lash out or they do something reckless you know so it is important to kind of manage those things so if you cannot afford therapy what I would recommend there are like a million a million DBT workbooks out there I'll link one of them down below like one of my favorite ones it's like mindfulness for borderline personality disorder something like that I'll link it down in the description below but if you cannot afford therapy like do something just do something because you can begin to get better while your your BPD may never be completely cured life can get exponentially better but if you have the resources like if you have health insurance talk to your doctor talk to your insurance provider talk to friends or family see if they can recommend a therapist for who specializes in dialectical behavioral therapy I personally use better help online therapy and they have certain therapists who specialize in DBT so if you would like to check that out there is an affiliate link down below basically what that means you get cheap affordable online therapy and a little bit comes back and supports the channel all right but just know that this isn't without hope and once you accept your diagnosis now you can begin working on it all right but anyways that's all I got for this video if you like this video please give it a thumbs up if you're new make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos and a huge huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on patreon you're all amazing and by the way before I let you go don't forget to follow me on instagram and twitter at the rewired soul all right thanks again so so much for watching I'll see you next time