 Welcome back ladies and gentlemen. We're into the third section now Guys, if you have any questions, I'd like to start by opening the floor to you Just in case anybody has any questions about anything I covered in the last section Do you guys get where I'm coming from where I'm talking? I keep hammering this moral moral philosophy thing You guys get that right? It's only so that you have stronger boundaries and so that you have more resilience One of the things that concerns me with things going in a toxically passive way is there are certain personality traits that carry across culture and when We dial down for some of them and it's millions of people there are problems one of them is resilience like people's resilience has gotten shit Resilience is your capacity to deal with stress your capacity to thrive in adverse conditions and your mental toughness generally speaking is resilience a Toxically passive consumeristic Pleasure-seeking immediate gratification culture obviously one of the first things that is going to go down is going to be resilience People have asked me whether social media Generates narcissistic personality disorder and I would say probably not no But there is a constellation of traits that if you move up and down like a Mixing board on a sound mixer People are going to look and function as though they have narcissistic personality disorder low levels of resilience Low impulse control a lack of ability to enforce your will on the world or on yourself these are highly narcissistic and Psychopathic traits when it's affecting a whole culture of people and we move in a certain direction That's when it becomes dangerous. I hope I don't sound like a middle-aged Comudgian when I keep going on about boundaries and respect. I really hope I'm not turning into my grandfather It's that from my point of view boundaries protect us from each other on a daily basis being well-mannered Protects you from me and me from you. I might not be in a very good mood But manners and good boundaries let me know that just because I'm not feeling good doesn't mean I don't have respect for you I'm just in a low state right now. Does that make sense? That's why I keep coming back to these these things. I Don't consider myself a traditional conservative. However, sometimes when I'm talking I'm thinking I can't It's I don't like one a little bit accidentally and so If you guys there's there's no questions at the moment. Oh, yes, sir. Yes As one develops its own moral values and boundaries Most probably he or she will find him he more herself ostracized by the society he or she lives in as the society The test diversity in reality Especially in those in those moral aspects now ostracism is something we fear because it's a sort of abandonment especially of course with the work situation the Family and and we've seen so much pressures for people who are doing something different especially in values What's your opinion on how we create indeed these resilience and coping or rather this? Strengths of character to make sure that we can cope with this ostracism. Yeah, I mean When I'm teaching clients to develop their boundaries and we work on their personal values Usually what happens is their boundaries increase and their personal values are being enforced Their self-worth goes up When they're the self-worth of an individual has gone up there is usually turbulence within the tribal community because They were operating at one level and it's like an aeroplane. That's changed altitude You can't now operate at the same level and very unconsciously and very automatically friction and confrontation as the result If you are in a tribe with people who will ostracize you for displaying self-love and self-respect That's not a tribe you want to be in anyway, and those people who would ostracize you for simply being able to say no And not people you should be associating with I have a video It's like one of the most popular videos I ever released on YouTube I think I was like a million views now where I just said here's the simplest test for narcissistic personality disorder. It takes 15 seconds Smile at the person and tell them the word no That's it That's it if I go into a full-blown rage attack because you smiled at me and said no to an instruction Something is up and that's not a rational adult reaction to somebody simply saying yo, I don't want to do that right now Give me a lift do this for me. No No explanation required. Just no you don't have to be a dick about it You don't have to be strong-arming people have been aggressive. You just smile and say no their emotional response to that tells you everything you need We're talking specifically here to men And particularly with the theme of protecting yourself against potentially toxic relationships with women This is a good test early on and not every woman who responds badly to this has full-blown narcissistic personality disorder Well, borderline personality disorder. She might just be an entitled little fucking brat And it's not your job to help somebody mature and you certainly can't help somebody mature through a sexually intimate relationship Anyway, don't fantasize that for a second Relationships protect people from maturation. They don't encourage maturation very rarely very very rarely That's why you can get people Who go into a relationship at a certain age and it's like they're in a time capsule and then they get divorced So they went in age 38 they divorce age 56 and there are certain ways when they come out of that relationship at age 56 They're still 38 years old there's parts of them that didn't grow that didn't develop because they were protected from the real world They're protected from pain pain and suffering suffering leads to realization Leads to development of maturation and you can avoid it in a relationship. So If you guys are looking at getting into a relationship with somebody you should set some boundaries early on and you should experiment to say No, just refuse. Don't fawn all the time and tell yourself. It's chivalry. Don't that's not chivalry really If you're always saying yes to every demand, that's just a fawning codependent response. That's neurotic Sometimes it's no sometimes it's I don't have time for you right now If you always have time for somebody even if it's not a sexual Sexually intimate relationship, they're gonna lose respect for you over time because they will you're communicating I have nothing else going on in my life that is more important than chatting to you for a couple of hours That's not good. Have somewhere to go have somewhere to be be busy be on a mission Who was the speaker today that said about being on a mission? Somebody did somebody said something like that. It may have been a J. Cortes said, you know You should you should have a purpose you should have a mission if you don't you're not attractive You're not attractive to me Yeah, I don't like, you know, I can feel guys who are rudderless and they're just like, hey, hi I'm like, okay If you're on a mission, I can at least respect the fact that you have a purpose in life that you have put a philosophy You developed a moral philosophy You didn't just leave it in your journal. You had the will and the intent to put it into action What was your question and did I answer it? Was a good answer good. I'm at that stage of sleeplessness and caffeine where I don't even know Yeah, sure So you said something that kind of just hit me earlier about fawning, right, which basically as you said simping right, so You see all these like Instagram models and the girls or whatever on on on the social media They just got all these simps, you know and as a as a guy in the dating world like there's zero simping on this I don't I don't be simping Yeah, but I can tell when I see how these women act on the internet and in real life that they're used to do simping So they get there's friction when I don't comply that behavior So my whole point my question is like is this simping really like for the dudes Is that something like dating gets something from childhood and that's why they're like trying to get this validation from women You know what I'm saying which then thus leads to this like kind of development of narcissistic behavior or What's the what's the origin of simping on the men side? You know I'm saying it could be it mean it could be childhood trauma, but you know There's an expression To a carpenter every problem is a nail and every solution is a hammer I wouldn't want to be that guy who applies like a steep-seated Psychological childhood trauma to everything that there is I just think we live in a simp society. It's a simp culture Women are the best thing in the world being young is the best thing in the world being beautiful is the best thing in the world Didn't always look like this Sometimes we had different cultural values wisdom was the greatest thing being a philosopher was the greatest thing being or even like in a Warrior culture being the number one gladiator would have been the best thing now its youth and Beauty and sex and instant gratification. I do sound like a middle-aged curmudgeon. Don't I I really fucking do I'm turning into my grandfather I referenced Patrice O'Neill before I highly recommend you guys look him up all of his interviews are on are on YouTube There's a documentary about him a fan made one. It's well worth watching He said of women when they're he called it the sickness. So when they have the sickness like this It's not their fault It's our fault. We make them sick simps make them sick and every fucking man has simped at some point We all sent we all sent because it's powerful if you're a heroin addict if you were sat there as a heroin addict and you were Jonesing for heroin and you wanted to talk to me about philosophy and I said a little vile of heroin And I was just talking to you and we're just going to talk about economics. You'd be talking to me. We're like, yeah Economics. Oh, yeah, I'm gonna economics the shout out fucking her you can't like you're you're got your thirsty You're got you want I've got it right here, and I'm just Yeah, so anyway, what do you think about economics? I'll be on Instagram with my vile like oh, oh, you can see my vile. No, stop Why are you looking at it? Why are you looking? You know, it's it's it's a stupid But it infantilizes them then they act like dumb teenagers and they don't grow out that dumb teenage attention seeking mindset so I think it's it is a cultural problem and Somebody who's asked me about this before like men also fall into it You have good-looking guys who are on social media on Instagram who are showing themselves naked being the beautiful body that then Men and women are supposed to pursue it's it's it's it's it's always been there I'm sure like in King Arthur's times there were fucking simps and you know, it's um, if you really crave something You're going to give parts of yourself away in order to get it. It's an unfortunate thing because It keeps people sick. It keeps everybody in the environment sick And one of the things I would say by the way guys every time I finish a talk I'm like fuck you need to say this there needs to be a concept of brotherhood The way women have sisterhood women back each other up so much fucking more than men do We just leave each other in the field. I've seen situations Now available exclusively at 21 University The all-new CPTSC masterclass by Richard Granite This is the world's most advanced educational course on healing from complex trauma as a man Learn more at the link below or visit 21 University comm