 Do you know someone who changed their behavior abruptly? Are they now easily angered and often talking about depressing things? Every person has a different reaction to trauma and pain. This is why it's good to learn in advance about it and what to do when the situation arises. So here are 6 signs to look out for if you think someone is secretly in pain. 1. They become silent. Do you notice your friend or family member suddenly goes uncharacteristically quiet where they no longer reply to your messages, don't engage in social media or don't communicate with you the way they used to. It might be that they're introverted in nature, but there's a difference between being introverted and a sudden change in behavior. If you feel like there's something wrong, there's a chance they're facing a personal problem and hurting inside. People usually withdraw from social interactions due to past trauma, which is a form of protection and prevention against any emotional triggers or problematic situations. They feel safer when they're alone, even if it comes at the cost of isolating themselves away from their own friend groups. But although space is important, social isolation can be dangerous. Studies have found that social isolation increases the risk for health problems to the same degree as abusing alcohol or smoking 15 cigarettes a day. When you know someone who is acting like this, it's important to reach out to them even though it may be uncomfortable and you may receive a negative reaction. Tell them that you're there for them and you're ready to listen to them if they would like to open up. 2. They Lash Out When someone is in pain, they tend to become short tempered. They may become easily irritated and possibly lash out or push you away when you reach out to them. But try to understand that this behavior is normal and they're coming from a place of hurt and they're doing this because they don't know how to process their pain in a healthy way, so they project it outwards. So your response is the most important thing to consider. Lashing back at them would only make it worse and cause them to withdraw further. Instead, try to give them space so that you can still help them when they need it. You can choose to stay silent or talk it out with them. Tell them how you feel and that you understand where they're coming from. 3. They Become Reckless Do you notice the person engaging in destructive, risky behavior? Sometimes it's good to take risks and they can help you become stronger and more confident. However, if someone is being oddly reckless or more rash than usual, they're most likely using it as a defense mechanism or an escape from being hurt. Sometimes it's smoking, drinking, and binge eating. Other times it may be they no longer take baths, don't care about personal hygiene, and refuse to clean their rooms. If someone you know is behaving like this, it helps to talk it out with them or find alternative activities. There will be times when they don't want to talk. So if they would rather do something else, you can join them or encourage them to watch a movie, play video games, or other stuff to help take their mind off of things. 4. They Talk About Dark Topics A Lot Have they ever mentioned death or being useless and things like that? Even though it may be alarming, it doesn't necessarily mean that they're suicidal. But it always helps to ask if they want to talk about it. People who are facing emotional disturbance or past trauma tend to feel hopeless and are more likely to think about their own lives and their meaning. If that's the case, try reaching out to them regularly and be by their side, supporting and encouraging them to seek help if needed. 5. They Become Increasingly Paranoid Do you notice them nitpicking everything or becoming more cynical? Repressed emotional pain can resurface in the form of paranoia and anxiety because they don't want to be triggered by previous traumatic experiences. For example, they may not want to hang out with their friends anymore because they're reminded of a big fight that happened, so they may become anxious about meeting people and develop trust issues. Try to keep your mind open and put yourself in their shoes. If you were in their situation, how would you react? It's critical to not dismiss their paranoia, validate their feelings and tell them that you'll be there for them. 6. They're Always Tired Do you notice your friends sleeping a lot or looking tired? When people experience a bad or traumatic event, they can have aftershock reactions such as concentration difficulty and fatigue. They might not want to get out of bed, eat and take care of themselves. When this happens, it's good to let them do the things that feel natural to them. It's important that they get a lot of rest and know that their support group is within reach. If they don't want to eat, try offering to feed them or try cooking them food. Recovery may take a while, and it may vary from person to person. But if they know you're there for assistance, the impact on their healing process is significant. Do you know someone who is displaying these symptoms? If so, there is always something you can do to help them. And if you're the one who's in pain, please remember that others are available to help. If you know people who may relate or learn from this, please share it with them. The references and studies used are listed in the description below. If you enjoyed this video, hit the like button and subscribe to Psych2Go for more content. Thanks for watching and see you next time.