 Hi. I have a lot of thoughts running through my mind right now, and I probably should be doing a blog post about this topic that I'm going to be talking about before I'm making a video about it, but I was thinking I maybe want to do a video about it to get my thoughts together and then do a blog post about it. So there's some women on Facebook, women influencers who are essentially calling themselves Christians but picking up the feminist mantra. Feminism's goal was to cause a huge divide between men and women. They wanted to smash the patriarchy because they felt men just typically abuse women, so they need to get rid of anything that has to do with patriarchy and abuse. And in so doing, these female influencers have essentially wiped out 1st Peter 3.1 and 2. Those verses can't not apply to women these days. And these verses are about women, wives being in subjection to their husbands, disobedient husbands, to win them without a word by godly behavior. And they believe these verses causes abuse, so they encourage their followers to throw away, create to be as help meat, and love and respect, and probably my book, any book that teaches women to try to win their disobedient husbands by godly behavior and living in subjection to them. And I was going through all the comments and researching and reading and they don't like Gary Thomas. And Gary Thomas wrote something about porn and women's, how women, I didn't read the post because he, he erased it, but he apologized for it and said, a wife never, a man looking at porn is never his wife's fault. And I was pondering that and what God has to say about that in 1st Corinthians 7.5, he said, do not deprive each other. Why? Because unless Satan tempts you for your lack of self-control. So I believe a wife can be responsible for husbands looking at porn. Does that mean she's responsible for him looking at porn? No, but she's responsible for denying him sexually consistently and causing him to be tempted by Satan. So then he goes and looks at porn. So she is partly responsible. You don't, but then there's men of course who watch porn, whether they're deprived sexually or not. Those wives have no responsibility whatsoever and their husbands looking at porn. And husbands definitely need to take, take responsible ability for looking at porn. Porn is destructive. It's destructive on marriages. It's destructive on masculinity. It's horrible, horrible, horrible. It's a tool that Satan is using to destroy men and marriages and children. So men need to flee porn. I'm not trying to excuse men looking at porn and I never will. But a wife who is consistently, consistently depriving her husband sexually is causing Satan to tempt her husband, whatever that looks like, however he, whatever that, however Satan tempts him or what the husband, how the husband acts upon that is his responsibility. But she, godly wives are not to deprive their husbands sexually. That's just a fact. And that's what God commands of us unless it's a, for prayer and fasting. And of course after childbirth or illness and godly good husbands, even husband, disobedient husbands will understand that. They'll understand, understand not having sexual intimacy with their, with their wives when they're sick or injured or in pain or just recovering from childbirth. Like only a cruel husband would force himself upon his wife when she was, had one of those issues. Most husbands are not cruel. So anyway, so after reading through all these comments and pondering and to all these women saying they're burning Debbie Pearl's book and everything, and they just, women don't want to take any responsibility. And these women influencers, some of them have been abused themselves. And so they see everything through the lens of their abuse. And they will talk about emotional, physical, spiritual abuse. And almost every woman, many wives can fit themselves somewhere into that core category of abuse. Abuse has been so watered down. I used to mentor women one on one, I would go to their house and almost every single one told me that they were being abused by their husband. So I'd sit down and I'd listen, I'd give them one whole session where I would just listen to their story and know, guess what? They weren't being abused. Their husbands just were not treating them the way they wanted to be treated. They weren't, some of them may have felt emotionally abused or whatever. But if, if you're feeling abused by your husband in any way, unless it's physical abuse, you call, you plan a way of escape and get out. If he's physically abusing you or the children, get out. But emotional, spiritual, all those other things. I feel like women need to seek the counsel of an older, godly woman to really decide because women are so free to call everything abuse today. Everything's against man and everything's for women. Women have no responsibility. Patriarchy destroys, has destroyed men and marriages. No, that's wrong. Not all women are abused. Not one woman I mentored was abused in any way. She needed to learn who she was in Christ. She needed to learn to be a godly woman. She needed to learn to stop nagging and quarreling and manipulating her husband. She needed to learn 1 Peter 3, 1 and 2 if she was married to a disobedient husband. She needed to learn to win him without a word, living in subjection to him with godly behavior. No, this doesn't cause abuse. Cruel men abuse their husbands. God's commands do not cause abuse. Another thing is that these women don't think women should ever suffer. Suffer at all. If a husband isn't being as kind to them as they think or working too hard or whatever. And some women do suffer in marriage. They suffer because their husbands aren't godly, because they're not being kind or they're saying things that aren't kind or whatever. But read 1 Peter 2, the whole entire chapter, is about suffering for Christ and how we will be rewarded suffering for Christ. Yes, some women suffer in their marriages because they're Christians, because they're married to men that are disobedient to God's word. But then 1 Peter 3 begins with likewise. Likewise, there will be wives who suffer in their marriages. This isn't an automatic green card to leave and divorce your husband. It's not women. Many, many women have won their disobedient husbands without a word by living in subjection to them with godly behavior. The husbands decide to leave and divorce them. They need to let them go. There's a verse in 1 Corinthians about that, letting an unbelieving husband go if he leaves. But a wife should try to stay with her husband and win as long as she's not being physically abused. She's being emotionally abused or something else. She needs the wife's counsel, mentor, encouragement from an older godly woman. But I lost my train of thought. Whenever I'm thinking about what I'm going to say next, if I think about that, then I forget what I'm going to say. But anyway, we are called to suffer as believers in Jesus Christ. There's a woman named Connie Holquist, whose husband was in and out of jail for many, many years. But she never gave up. She always set a table, a plate, and everything for her husband. Every night for her six children to remember her husband, how she fought on her knees for her husband. Women need to remember this is a spiritual battle. One of my best friends, Dad, accepted the Lord practically on his deathbed. And he was a difficult man to live with. But her mother stayed with him. And he is now spending an eternity with Jesus Christ. We need to keep eternity in our vision. These influencers are neglecting to teach this, neglecting to have women on their knees praying for their husbands, keeping eternity in their view, understanding that we will suffer. On this earth, if we are believers in Jesus Christ, we're promised persecution, we're promised tribulation. There is no pain for life. But fighting for your marriage is a good thing. And if he's physically abusing you, like I said, you need to seek a way of escape and to get away from that situation. But if he's not, if it's a difficult marriage, find a godly older woman. Seek wise counsel from her and encouragement. And fight on your knees for your marriage. Win him without a word. God's ways work for most marriages. Some husbands are so far, their hearts are so hardened. But even still, I just don't, God, you know, and God can break the hardest heart. So faith can grow. I had that poster on my bedroom wall when I was a child, it was a picture of a rock split in two with a little flower. God can break the hardest heart. There's wives I know who are fighting for their marriages and wives who have won their marriages. So don't throw away those books. You know, a lot, they have good things to read. Don't read the books. Don't be influenced by those women influencers who are throwing out those verses and kind of encouraging all women to think that they're abused and that patriarchy is bad. And they're essentially saying that God's ways are bad and have gone full-blown feminism. We're promised persecution. We're promised suffering. We're not promised an easy life. But his ways are perfect. He is good and his plan for you is good. Romans 8, 28. But he wants us to live in obedience to him. His will for us are his boundaries for us. So fight the good fight of faith. It's not easy, but hard doesn't mean bad. Life is hard, but do it for God, the kingdom. Do it for your husband, eternal soul. And your children want you to stay together. Do all you can to stay together. Find a God of the older women and be mentored by her. Someone who will not speak evil about your husband but will just encourage you to keep on keeping on because you can do all things through Christ who strengthened you. Bye.