 You alluded earlier to sacrifices that you had to make for your family and for yourself as a couple and a lot of women these days They don't want to make sacrifices or they're afraid of the word sacrifice itself as something that they'll lose out on Describe what kind of sacrifices that you had made before that were actually beneficial in the long term for your relationship Well, I'll start with When we were still living in New York We had put a deposit on a home We were gonna be buying a house right around the corner from his parents house when they decided they were gonna be moving to Florida and we found out we were pregnant and We had to have a really difficult conversation about whether or not we were going to Continue on and buy this house And I was gonna have to go back to work when the baby was six weeks old so that we could afford this house or if we were going to lose our deposit and Allow me to stay home with our children and From the time I was in college and I got to babysit for my cousin and all of her friends who were all stay-at-home moms I had never been exposed to that concept before going away to college We made a really difficult decision that we were going to keep me home And he was going to do whatever he had to do in order to make that work and over those next few months We picked up we moved to Florida we stayed with his parents and He worked seven days a week For two years from six in the morning till ten at night working working working working working Until we could get ourselves Situated and Start our family the way we really wanted to start our family was with me home with the baby and That was really difficult and we didn't have money We were talking about what we were gonna do like once we you know got into our first little house What are we gonna do if if the electricity gets shut off? What are we gonna do if we can't afford food like what are our priorities? But keeping me home with the kids was such a high priority for us that and he worked so hard and incrementally We were able to to move our way up And I look back at it now and I'm like, you know, we know it was by the grace of God that it all worked out but You know, I could have just gone back to work. I could have just put my kid in daycare and We could have just You know started our family that way, but it was that important to us that we We made we made that sacrifice and now looking back I couldn't imagine not having been home with my kids now homeschooling them and Having those those moments those knowing that I was the one that fed them and Nurse them and took care of them and provided that foundation for them There's nothing that could have replaced that Yeah, and so, you know when you use the word sacrifice that means that there's something that you're giving up you might you need to have something to sacrifice and It's unique because we didn't have anything there really was nothing to to sacrifice in a way So a lot of couples who get together say in their mid-20s or 30s Well, they already have their own bank accounts. They already have their own cars. They have their own careers They have their own stuff. Maybe they have it. We had I had nothing of my own I just left my parents house. She had nothing of her own So rather than, you know, you use the word sacrifice and that makes a lot of sense But we hadn't we had nothing to sacrifice except for time love attention and Commitment and so I think that's a part of the reason why we were able to Be so have such longevity in our Relationship and to do so well because there was never this sense of well I'm giving up something here or she's giving up the potential for something there. It was like This is what's meant to be and we're starting out at the bottom together So that was Yeah, you know, I had a similar experience when I was young my in my early 20s My you know, my father was the dumbest person I'd ever met and by the time I was 40 I couldn't believe how smart he'd got yeah and You know, one of the things he told me was, you know You need to be free to make mistakes and learn from them Yeah, you know, he said there are three kinds of people people that can learn from others people that have to learn For themselves and people that can't learn at all, right? It's like be the first two at least, right? You know, I've seen a lot of men in marriages Where their wives don't let them make mistakes and they they have interpreted leadership to mean you never air, right? So that if you ever air then you have no right to leadership, right? Can you discuss kind of how you dealt with that in your marriage and and what advice you might give to young couples? I think that's more for her because I make errors. He makes errors. I for me, I Always go back to the fact that I am his wife not his mother My job is not to teach him. My job is not to discipline him. My job is not to You know slap him on the wrist when he does something wrong or makes it an incorrect choice or a bad decision my job is to support him to encourage him to Give him any strength when he does not feel like he has enough when when when he's feeling like Uncertain to say just make the choice whatever the choice is make the choice and it will be okay. I think Letting him make the decisions letting him make the the big choices Knowing it comes from an intention of love and purity and Just wanting good for our family It gives him the opportunity to show himself to show who he really is to show where his heart is and Regardless of how those decisions come out when you know it comes from a place of love and Wanting good for our family it it doesn't really matter what the outcome is Yeah few things that might add to that is that She was warned. I told her life is gonna be like a roller coaster I know myself and so there could be some tough times. There could be some rough times They're gonna be some great times I never promised a rose garden or or or smooth smooth ride It was hey, I'm going on this wild adventure and I'm that kind of guy where I Make me some decision some wrong decisions, but with that being said making the wrong decisions not really the problem It's about making that decision right there have been a lot of times where you know Maybe we're steering them steering the ship and it's not going exactly where we're supposed to go And it's just a matter of okay. I admit I repent. I'm wrong. Let's Turn things but one thing for sure is she'll never Rub it in my face or say I told you so or or insist She'll just quietly Yield to my steering of the ship and then even if I have to admit you were right and I gotta turn around still zip Keeps it cool keeps it quiet and that gives me courage it gives me courage to continue to make bold decisions even if they don't turn out right and The opportunity to rack up a good track record Right like if you never give someone the freedom to have a track record or you give them that one time and it's not perfect You how could you expect that person to grow and to flourish and to lead? So those are some of the things that I would add to that every opportunity is is there to to show your to show your strength to show your courage to show your right thinking and Each time you make a decision beast on The goodness of our family it We wind up going in the right direction. Yeah, sure great. Thank you Okay, last year Colleen Elliott told us a story about purchasing a vehicle and That would have been really hard for someone like me. I don't know if I could have shut up