 Chapter 27 of our friend the charlatan. This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org. Our friend the charlatan by George Gissing. Chapter 27 Lashmar walked back to Hollingford and reached the hotel without any consciousness of the road by which he had come. He felt as tired as if he had been walking all day. When he had dropped into an easy chair, he let his arms hang and with head drooping forward, stared at his feet, stretched out before him. The posture suggested a man had overcome with drink. He had a private meeting to attend tonight. Should he attend it or not? His situation had become farcical. Was it not his plain duty to withdraw at once from the political contest that a serious candidate might as soon as possible take his place? Where could he discern even the glimmer of a hope in this sudden darkness? His heart was heavy and cold. He went through the business of the evening talking automatically, seeing and hearing as in a dream. He had no longer the slightest faith in his electioneering prospects and wondered how he could ever have been sanguine about them. Of course, the conservative would win. Brake Spear knew it. Every member of the committee knew it. They pretended to hope because the contest amused and occupied them. No liberal had a chance at Hollingford. Tomorrow he would throw the thing up and disappear. Never in his life had he passed such a miserable night. At each waking from hag-ridden slumbers, the blackest despondency beset him. Once or twice his tortured brain even glanced towards suicide. Temptation lurking in the assurance that by destroying himself, he would become for a few days at all events the subject of universal interest. He found no encouragement even in the thought of Iris Wolstein. Not only had he deeply offended her by his engagement to Constance Bride, but almost certainly she would hear from her friend, Mrs. Toplady, the whole truth of his disaster, which put him beyond hope of pardon. He owed her money. With what face, even if she did not know the worst, could he go to her and ask for another loan? In vain did he remember the many proofs he had received of Mrs. Wolstein's devotion since the interview with Constance, all belief in himself, was at an end. He had thought his eloquence, his personal magnetism, irresistible. Constance had shown him the extent of his delusion. If he saw Iris, the result would be the same. At moments so profound was his feeling of insignificance that he hid his face, even from the darkness, and groaned. Not only had he lost faith in himself, there remained to him no conviction, no trust, no hope of any kind. Intellectually, morally, he had no support. Shams, insincerities, downright dishonesties had clothed him about, and these were now all stripped away, leaving the thing he called his soul to quiver in shamed nakedness. He knew nothing, he believed nothing, but death still made him fearful. With the first gleam of daylight he flung himself out of his hot, uncomfortable bed and hastened to be a clothed mortal once more. He felt better as soon as he had dressed himself and opened the window. The night, with its terrible hauntings, was a thing gone by. At breakfast he thought fixedly of Iris Wolstein, perhaps Iris had not seen Mrs. Toplady yet. Perhaps at heart she was not so utterly estranged from him as he feared. Something of his old power over her might even now be recovered. It was the resource of desperation. He must try it. The waiter's usual respect seemed this morning covert mockery. The vians had no savor, only the draft of coffee that soothed his throat was good. He had a headache and a tremor of the nerves. In any case it would have been impossible to get through the day in the usual manner, and his relief when he found himself at the railway station was almost a return of good spirits. Unreaching London he made straight for West Hamston. As he approached Mrs. Wolstein's house his heart beat violently. Without even a glance at the windows he rang the visitor's bell. It sounded distinctly, but there came no response. He rang again and again, listened to the far-off tinkling. Only then did he perceive that the blinds at the lower windows were drawn. The house was vacant. Realized for a moment he stared about as if in search of someone who could give him information. Then with sweat on his forehead he stepped up to the next door and asked if anything was known of Mrs. Wolstein. He learned only that she had been absent for about ten days. Where she was the servant with whom he spoke could not tell him. Were the other neighbors likely to know? He asked, encouraged by a bare possibility, he inquired at the house beyond, but in vain. Fate was against him. He might as well go home and write a letter to his committee at Hollingford. Stay, could he not remember the school to which Leonard Wolstein had been sent? Yes, it was noted in his pocketbook, for he had promised to write to the boy. He sought the nearest post office and dispatched a telegram to Leonard. Please let me know immediately your mother's present address. The reply was to be sent to his rooms in Devonshire Street and that there he straightway betook himself, hoping that in an hour or so he would have news. An extemporary lunch was put before him, never had he satisfied his hunger with less gusto. Time went on. The afternoon brought him no telegram. At seven o'clock he lay on his sofa, exhausted by a nervous strain, anticipating a hideous night. Again, his thoughts had turned to suicide. It would be easier to obtain poison here than at Hollingford, Laudanam. Death under Laudanam must be very easy, mere falling asleep in a sort of intoxication. But he must leave behind him something in writing, something which would excite attention when it appeared in all the newspapers. Addressed to the corner, no, to his committee. He would hint to them of a tragic story of noble powers and ambitions frustrated by the sordid difficulties of life. The very truth let Malus say what it would, at his age with his brain and heart, to perish thus for want of a little money, as he dwelt on the infinite pathos of the thing, tears well to his eyes, trickled over his cheek. Of a sudden he started up and, shouted, come in. Yes, it was a telegram. He took it from the servant's hand with an exclamation of joy. Leonard informed him that Mrs. Wolstein was staying at Gorliston, near Yarmouth, her address, Sunrise Terrace. He clutched at a railway guide, too late to get to Yarmouth tonight, but that did not matter, Sunrise Terrace. In his sorry state of mind, a name of such good omen brought him infinite comfort. He rushed out of the house and walked at a great rate, impelled by the joy of feeling himself alive once more, Sunrise, Iris Wolstein would save him. Already he warmed with gratitude to her. He thought of her with a tender kindness. She might be richer than he supposed. At all events she was in circumstances which would allow him to live independently, and were she not just the kind of woman Constance Bright had advised him to marry? Advice given in scorn, but his conscience told him thoroughly sound. A nice gentle, sufficiently intelligent little woman pity that there was the boy, but he would always be at school. Suppose she had only four or five hundred a year, oh probably more than that, seeing that she could economize such substantial sums. He was saved. The sum would rise for him, literally, and in metaphor. A rainy morning saw him at Liverpool Street, the squalid roofs of northeast London dripped miserably under a leavened sky. Not till the train reached the borders of Suffolk did a glint of sun fall upon meadow and stream. Thence onwards the heavens brightened. The risen clouds gleamed above a shining shore. Lashmar did not love this part of England, and he wondered why Mrs. Wolstein had chosen such a retreat, but in the lightness of his heart he saw only pleasant things. Arrived at Yarmouth he jumped into a cab, and was driven along the dull flat road which leads to Gorliston. Odour of the brine made amends for miles of lodgings, for breaks laden with boisterous trippers for tram cars and piano organs. Here at length was Sunrise Terrace, a little row of plain houses on the top of the cliff, with sea horizon vast before and soft green meadowland far as one could see behind. Bidding his driver weight, Lashmar knocked at the door and stood tremulous. It was half past twelve. Iris might or might not have returned from her morning walk. He prepared for a brief disappointment, but worse awaited him. Mrs. Wolstein, he learned, would not be at home for the midday meal. She was with friends who had a house at Gorliston. Whereas the house he asked impatiently, stamping as if his feet were cold, the woman pointed his way. Who are the people? What is their name? He heard it, but it conveyed nothing to him. After a moment's reflection he decided to go to the hotel and there write a note. Whilst he was having lunch the reply came a dry missive saying that if he would call at three o'clock, Mrs. Wolstein would have much pleasure in presenting him to her friends the barkers with whom she was spending the day. Lashmar fumed, but obeyed the invitation. In a garden on the edge of the cliff he found half a dozen persons, an elderly man who looked like a retired tradesman, his wife of suitable appearance, their son, their two daughters, and Iris Wolstein. Loud and mirthful talk was going on, his arrival interrupted it only for a moment. So glad to see you was Mrs. Wolstein's friendly but not cordial greeting. I didn't know you ever came to the East Coast. Introductions were carelessly made. He seated himself on a camp stool by one of the young ladies and dropped a few insignificant remarks. No one paid much attention to him. Seventy-five runs exclaimed Mrs. Wolstein addressing herself as though with keen interest to the son of the family, a high-colored, large-limbed young man of about Lashmar's age. That was splendid, but you did better still against East Croydon, didn't you? Made my sentry there answered Mr. Barker jerking out a leg in self-satisfaction. How conceited you are making him, Mrs. Wolstein cried one of his sisters with a shrill lap. It's a rule in this house to put the stopper on Jim when he begins to talk about cricket. If we didn't, there'd be no living with him. Are you a cricketer, Mr. Lashar? Asked matter families, eyeing the visitor curiously. It's a long time since I played, was the reply uttered with scarcely veiled contempt. Mrs. Wolstein talked on in the highest spirits, exhibiting her intimacy with the Barker household and her sympathy with their concerns. Lashmar waited for her to question him about hauling Ford to give him an opportunity of revealing his importance, but her thoughts seemed never to turn in that direction. As soon as a movement in the company enabled him to rise, he stepped up to her and said in a voice audible to those standing by, I want to speak to you about Leonard. Shall you be at home this evening? Iris gave him a startled look. You haven't bad news of Len? Oh no, nothing of the kind. Can you call it six o'clock? He looked into her eyes and nodded. What do you say to a boat? Mrs. Wolstein shouted Barker the son. This suggestion was acclaimed and Lashmar was urged to join the party, but he gladly seized this chance of escape, wandering along the grassy edge of the cliffs. He presently described the Barkers and their friend putting forth in two little boats the sight exasperated him. He strove gloomily on, ever and again turning his head to watch the boats and struggling against the fears that once more assailed him. In a hollow of dry sand where the cliffs broke, he flung himself down and lay still for an hour or two. Below him, on the edge of the tide, children were playing. He watched them sullenly, Lashmar disliked children. The sound of their voices was disagreeable to him. He wondered whether he would ever have children of his own and heartily hoped not. Six o'clock seemed very long and coming, but at length he found himself at sunrise terrace again and was admitted to an ordinary lodging house parlor where, with tea on the table, Mrs. Wolstein awaited him. The sea air had evidently done her good. She looked younger and prettier than when Dice last saw her and the tea gown she wore became her well. How did you know where I was? She began by asking, rather distantly. Lashmar told her in detail, but why were you so anxious to see me? Sugar, I think. It's a long story, he replied, looking at her from under his eyebrows and I don't much care for telling you in a place like this where all we can say be heard by anyone on the other side of the door. Iris was watching his countenance, the cold politeness with which she had received him, become a very transparent mask beneath it showed eager curiosity and trembling hope. We can go out if you like, she said, and most likely meet those singular friends of yours. Who on earth are they? Very nice people, replied Mrs. Wolstein, holding up her head. They are intolerably vulgar and you must be aware of it. I felt ashamed to see you among them. What are you doing at a place like this? Why have you shut up your house? Really, exclaimed Iris with a flutter. That is my business. Lashmar's nervous irritation was at once subdued. He looked timidly at the indignant face that his eyes fall and murmured an apology. I've been going through strange things and I'm not quite master of myself. The night before last, his voice sent to a hollow note. I very nearly took poison. What do you mean, poison? Mrs. Wolstein's eyes widened in horror. Lashmar regarded her with a smile of intense melancholy. One thing only kept me from it. I remembered that I was in your debt and I felt it would be too cowardly. What has happened? Come and sit near the window. No one can hear us talking here. I've been expecting to read of your election. Is it something to do with Lady Orgren's debt? I've wanted so much to know about that and how it affected you. A few questions gave dice the comfortable assurance that Iris had not seen Mrs. Toplady for a long time. Troubled with servants, she said, coming after a slight illness, had decided her to quit her house for the rest of the summer and the barkers persuaded her to come to Gorillaston. When Leonard left school for his holidays, she meant to go with him to some nice place. But do tell me what you mean by those dreadful words and why have you come to see me? She was her old self, the Iris Wolstein, on whom, first of all, Lashmar had tried his method, who had so devoutly believed in him and given such substantial proof of her faith, the man felt his power and began to recover self-respect. Tell me one thing he said bending towards her. May I remain your debtor for a little longer? Will it put you to inconvenience? Not at all, was the impulsive reply. I told you I didn't want the money. I have more than six hundred pounds a year and never spend quite all of it. Lashmar durst not raise his eyes, lest a dream of joy should betray him. He knew now what he had so long desired to know. Six hundred a year, it was enough. You were very kind, that relieves me. For two or three days I have been in despair. Yes, you shall hear all about it. I owe you the whole truth, for no one ever understood me as you did and no one ever gave me such help of every kind, first of all, about my engagement to Miss Bride. It's at an end, but more than that, it wasn't a real engagement at all. We tried to play a comedy and the end has been tragic. Iris drew a deep breath of wonder. Her little lips were parted. Her little eyebrows made a high arch. She had the face of a child who listens to a strange and half terrifying story. Don't you see how it was? He exclaimed in a subdued voice of Melodia's sadness. Lady Ogrem discovered that her niece, you remember May Tomlin, thought rather too well of me. This did not suit her views. She had planned a marriage between May and Lord Dimchurch. You know what her temper was. One day she gave me the choice. Either I married Constance Bride or I never entered her house again. Imagine my position. Think of me with my ambitions, my pride and the debt I had incurred to you. Can you blame me much if seeing that Lady Ogrem's life might end any day? I met her tyranny by strategy. How I longed to tell you the truth, but I felt bound in honor to silence. Constance Bride, my friend, and never anything more, agreed to the pretense of an engagement. Wasn't it brave of her? And so things went on, until the day when Dimchurch came down to Riveno and proposed to May, the silly girl refused him. There was a terrible scene such as I hope, never to behold again. May was driven forth from the house and Lady Ogrem, just as she was bidding me, takes steps for my immediate marriage, unconscious, dying. He paused impressively. The listener was panting as if she had run a race. And the will, she asked, it dates from a year ago. May Tomlin has not mentioned in it. I, of course, have nothing. Iris gazed at the floor. A little sound as of consternation had passed her lips, but she made no attempt to console the victim of destiny, who sat with bowed head before her. After a brief silence, the listener told of the will, as it concerned Constance Bride, insisting on the fact that she was a mere trustee of the wealth bequeathed to her. With a humorously docile smile, he spoke of Lady Ogrem's promise to defray his election expenses, and added that Miss Bride, in virtue of her trusty ship, would carry out this wish. Another exclamation sounded from the listener, this time one of joy. Well, that's something I suppose the expenses are heavy, aren't they? I'm not very, but what's the use? Of course, I withdraw. He let his hand fall despondently. Again, there was silence. And that is why you thought of taking poison, asked Iris, with a quick glance at his lowering visage. Isn't it a good reason? All is over with me. If Lady Ogrem had lived to make her new will, I should have been provided for. Now I am penniless and hopeless. But if she had lived, you would have had to marry Miss Bride. You made a thoughtful gesture. No, she would never have consented, even if I could have brought myself to such a sacrifice. In any case, I was doomed. But Iris paused, biting her lip. You were going to say, only that I suppose you would have been willing to marry that girl, the niece? I will answer you frankly. He spoke in the softest tone and his look had a touching candor. You, better than anyone, know it is not merely personal. One doesn't like to talk grandiloquently, but, along with you, there is no harm in saying that I have a message for our time. We have reached a point in social and political evolution where all the advance of modern life seems to be imperiled by the growing preponderance of the multitude. Our need is of men who are born to guide and rule, and I feel myself one of these. But what can I do as long as I am able to answer you frankly, yes. If May Tomlin had inherited Lady Oglam's wealth, I should have felt it my duty to marry her. Iris listened without a smile. Last Mar had never spoken with a more convincing show of earnestness. What is she going to do, asked the troubled little woman, her eyes cast down. Dice told all that he knew of May's position. He was then questioned as to the state of things political at Haulingford. His replies were disconsolate. Well, he said at length that I have done my best, but fortune is against me. In coming to see you, I discharged what I felt to be a duty. Let me again thank you for your generous kindness. Now I must work, work. He stood an image of noble sadness, of magnanimity, at issue with cruel fate. Iris glanced timidly at him. Her panting showed that she wished to speak, but could not. He offered his hand. Iris took it but only for an instant. I want you to tell me something else, broke from her lips. I will tell you anything. Are you in love with that girl, Miss Tomlin? With sorrowful dignity, he shook his head with proud self-consciousness. He smiled. Nor with Miss Bride. I think of her exactly as if she were a man. If I told you that I very much wished you to do something, would you care to do it? Your wish is for me a command. Dice answered gently. If it were not, I should be grossly ungrateful. Then promise to go through with the election. Your expenses are provided for. If you win, I am sure some way can be founded providing you with an income. I am sure it can. It shall be as you wish, said Lashmar, seeming to speak with a resolute cheerfulness. I will return to Hollingford by the first train tomorrow. They talked for a few minutes more. Lashmar mentioned where he was going to pass the night. They promised to resume their long interrupted correspondence and to let his friend have frequent reports from Hollingford. Then they shook hands and parted silently. After dinner, dice strayed shorewards. He walked down to the little harbour and out on to the jetty. A clouded sky had brought night fast upon sunset, green and red lamp shown from the lighthouse at the jetty head and the wash of the rising tide sounded in darkness on either side. Not many people had chosen this spot for their evening walk, but as he drew near to the lighthouse he saw the figure of a woman against the grey obscurity. She was watching a steamboat slowly making its way through the harbour mouth. He advanced and at the sound of his nearing step, the figure faced to him. There was just light enough to enable him to recognize Iris. You ought to be here alone, he said. Oh, why not? She replied with a sigh. I'm old enough to take care of myself. The wind had begun to moan. Waves tied born against the jetty made a hollow booming and at moments scattered spray. How black it is tonight, Iris added, it will rain. There I felt a spot. Only a splash of seawater, I think, replied Lashmar, standing close beside her. Both gazed at the dark vast of sea and sky. A pair of ramblers approached them, a young man talking loudly, the tongue of lower London. I know a young lady, sounded in the feminine voice, as a keeper, sat with a diamond and a hammoth this, lovely. Come away, said Dice, what a hateful place this is. How can you bear to be among such brutes? Iris moved on by him, but said nothing. I felt ashamed. He added to find you with people like the Barkers. Do you mean to say they don't disgust you? They are not so bad as that, Iris weekly protested. But you mustn't think I regard them as intimate friends. It's only that I've been rather lonely lately, land away at school, and several things. Yes, yes, I understand. But there are no company for you. Do get away as soon as possible. Another couple went by them talking loudly the same vernacular. If I put a book down for a day, said the young woman, I forget all I've read. I have a awful bad memory for reading. How I loathe that class Lashmore exclaimed, I never came to this part of the coast because I knew it was defiled by them for heaven's sake, get away, go to someplace where your ears won't be perpetually outraged. I can't bear to think of leaving you here. I'll go as soon as ever I can. I promise you, murmured Iris, there it really is beginning to rain. We must walk quickly. Will you take my arm? She did so, and they hurried on. That's the democracy, said Lashmore. Those are the people for whom we are told that the world exists. They get money, and it gives them power. Meanwhile, the true leaders of mankind as often as not struggle through their lives in poverty and neglect. Iris's voice sounded timidly. You would feel it of no use to have just enough for independence. For the present, he replied, it would be all I ask, but I might just as well ask for ten thousand a year. The rain was beating upon them during the ascent to Sunrise Terrace. Neither spoke a word. At the door for lodgings, Iris looked into her companion's face and said in a tremulous voice, I'm sure you will be elected. I'm certain of it. Dice left, pressed her hand, and as the door opened, walked away through the storm. End of chapter 27 Chapter 28 of Our Friend the Charlatan This is a LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit LibriVox.org Our Friend the Charlatan by George Gissing Chapter 28 Lord Din Church went down into Somerset. His younger sister was in a worse state of health than he had been led to suppose. There could be no thought of removing her from home. A day or two later, her malady took a hopeless turn, and by the end of the week, she was dead. A month after this, the surviving daughter of the house seeking solace in the ancient faith to which she had long inclined her religious community, Din Church was left alone. Since his abrupt departure from Rivenok, he had lived a silent life spending the greater part of every day in solitude. Grief was not sufficient to account for the heaviness and muteness which had fallen upon him or for the sudden change by which his youthful-looking countenance had become that of a middle-aged man. He had to shrink before eyes that regarded him, however kind their expression, one might have thought that some secret shame was harassing his mind. He himself, indeed, would have used no other word to describe the ill under which he suffered, looking back on that strange episode of his life which began with his introduction to Mrs. Toplady and ended in the park at Rivenok. He was stung almost beyond endurance by a sense of ignominious folly. On his lonely walks and in the silence of sleepless nights he often gesticulated and groaned like a man in pain. His nerves became so shaken that at times he could hardly raise a glass or cup to his lips without spilling the contents. Poverty and loneliness he had known and had learned to bear them with equanimity at the time he was tasting humiliation. Incessantly he reviewed the stages of his foolishness and as he deemed it of his dishonor, but he had lost the power to understand that phantasm of himself which pranked so grotesquely in the retrospect. Was it true that he had reasoned and taken deliberate step after step in the wooing of Lady Ogrum's niece? Did he not urge in his excuse to cloak him from his own and the world's contempt some unsuspected kalanchir for which had he known he ought to have taken medical advice? When in self chastisement he tried to summon before his mind's eye the image of May Tomlin he found it quite impossible. The face no longer existed for him. The voice was as utterly forgotten as any he might have chance to hear for a few minutes on that fatal evening in Pond Street and this was what he had seen as an object of romantic tenderness this vaporous nothing this glimmer in a dazed eye. Calm moments brought a saner self-reproach I simply yielded to the common man's common temptation I am poor and it was wealth that dazzled and lured me pride would explain more subtly that is but a new ground of shame I felt a prey to the vulgarist and basest passion better to burn that truth into my mind and to make the brand a lifelong warning I shall the sooner lift up my head again he seemed to palliate his act by remembering that he wished to benefit his sisters neither of them the poor dead girl and she who lived only for self-forgiftfulness had been happier at the cost of his disgrace how well it was indeed that he had been saved from that debasement in their eyes he lived on in the silent house quite alone and desiring no companionship few letters came for him and he rarely saw a newspaper after a while he was able to forget himself in the reading of books which tranquilized his thought and held him far from the noises of the passing world so sequestered was the great old house that he could go forth when he chose into lanes and meadows without fear of encountering anyone who would disturb his meditation and his enjoyment of nature's beauty through the mellow days of the declining summer he lived amid trees and flowers slowly recovering health and peace the birds note or the ripple of a stream or the sighing of the wind were the only sounds under the ever changing sky his thoughts were often of death but not on that account gloomy reading in his Marcus Aurelius he said to himself that the stoic emperor must after all have regarded death with some fear else why speak of it so persistently and with such marshaling of arguments to prove it no matter for dread dim church never wished to shorten his life yet without other logic than that of a quiet heart came to think more than resignedly of the end towards which he moved he was the last of his family and no child would ever bear his name without bitterness he approved this extinction of a line which seemed to have outlived its natural energies he at all events would bear no responsibility for suffering or wrongdoing in the days to come the things which had so much occupied him during the last year or two the state of the time its perils and its needs were now but seldom in his mind he felt himself ripening to that wise passiveness which through all his intellectual disquiet he had regarded as the unattainable ideal when as a very young man he exercised himself inversifying the model he more or less consciously kept in view was Matthew Arnold it amused him now to recall certain of the compositions he had once been rather proud of and to recognize how closely he had tried in Arnold's footprints at the same time he felt glad that the aspiration of his youth seemed likely to become the settled principle of his maturity nowadays he gave much of his thought to Wordsworth content to study without the desire of imitating whether he could do anything whether he could bear witness in any open way to what he held the truth must still remain uncertain sure it was that a profound distrust of himself in every practical direction a very humble sense of follies committed and dangers barely escaped would for a long time make him a silent and solitary man he hoped that some way might be shown him some modest yet clear way by following which he would live not wholly to himself but he had done forever with schemes of social regeneration with political theories with all high sounding words and phrases it might well prove that the work appointed him was simply to live as an honest man was that so easy or such a little thing walking one day a mile or two from home in one of those high summer set lanes which are unsurpassed for rural loveliness he came within sight of a little cottage which stood apart from a hamlet hidden beyond a near turning of the road before it moved a man white headed back bent so crippled by some ailment that he tottered slowly and painfully with the aid of two sticks just as dim church junior the old fellow accidentally let fall his pipe which he had been smoking as he struggled along for him this incident was a disaster he stared down helplessly at the pipe and the little curl of smoke which rose from it utterly unable to stoop for its recovery dim church seeing the state of things at once stepped to his assistance I thank you sir I thank you said the hobbler with pleasant frightness a man isn't much use when he can't even keep his pipe in his mouth to say what do you think sir dim church talked with him the man had spent his life as a gardener and now for a couple of years invalided by age and rheumatism had lived in this cottage on a pension his daughter I would have dealt with him but was away working nearly the whole of the day he got along very well but one thing there was that grieved him the state of his little garden through the early summer he had been able to look after it as usual powdering among the flowers and the vegetables for an hour or two each day but there it came rainy weather and with it one of his attacks and the garden was now so overgrown with weeds that had hurt his eyes it really did to look that way the daughter dug potatoes and gathered beans as they were wanted but she had neither time nor strength to do more interested in a difficulty such as he had never imagined dim church went up to the garden wall and viewed the state of things indeed it was deplorable this those docks nettles while growths enumerable were choking the flowers in which the old man so delighted but the garden was such a small one that little trouble and time would be needed to put it in the order will you let me do it for you he asked good naturedly it's just the kind of job I should like you sir quite the old fellow all but again losing his pipe and astonishment oh that's a joke indeed without another word dim church opened the wicket flung off his coat and got to work he labored for more than an hour the old man leaning on the wall and regarding him with half ashamed half amused countenance they did not talk much but when he had begun to perspire freely dim church looked at his companion and said now here's a thing I never thought of neglect your garden for a few weeks and it becomes a wilderness nature conquers it back again think what that means how all the cultivated places of the earth are kept from in only by ceaseless fighting with nature year in year out and that's true sir that's true I've thought of it sometimes but then I'm a gardener you see and it's my business as you may say to have such thoughts it's every man's business returned dim church supporting himself on his hoe and viewing the uprooted weeds I never realized as in this half hour at the cost of what incessant the earth is kept at man's service if I've done you a good turn you've done me a better and he hoed vigorously at a root of dandelion not for years had he felt so well embodied in mind as during his walk home there there was the thought for which he had been obscurely groping what were volumes of metaphysics and of sociology to the man who had heard this one little truth whispered from the upturned mold henceforth he knew why he was living and how it behoved him to live let theories and poisees follow if they would for him the prime duty was that nearest to him to strive his best at the little corner of earth which he called his own should yield food for man at this moment there lay upon his table letters informing him of the unsatisfactory state of his Kentish farm the tenant was doing badly in every sense of the word and would willingly escape from his lease if opportunity were given very well the man should go I will live there myself I will get some practical man to live with me until I understand farming for profit I don't care all will be well if I keep myself alive and furnish food for a certain number of other mortals this is the work ready to my hand no preaching no theorizing no trying to prove that the earth should be parceled I will cultivate this ground because it is mine and because no other way offers of living as a man should taking some part however humble in the eternal strife with nature the idea had before now suggested itself to him but not as the result of a living conviction if he had then turned to farming it would have been as an experiment in life more or less vague reflections on the needs of the time would have seemed to justify him now he was indifferent to all questions save that prime solicitude of the human race how to hold its own against the hostile forces everywhere leagueed against it life was a perpetual struggle and let dreamers say what they might could never be anything else he for one perceived no right that he had to claim exemption from the doom of labor had he felt an impulse to any other kind of work well and good he would have turned to it but nothing ever called to him with imperative voice save this task of telling his own acres it might not always satisfy him he took no vow of one soul vocation he had no desire to let his mind rust whilst his hands grew horny enough that for the present he had an aim which he saw as a reality on his return home he found a London letter awaiting him it was with a nervous shrug that he saw the writing of Mrs. Toplady addressing him at his club she invited him to dine on an evening a fortnight hence if he chanced to be in town you heard of course she added of the defeat of Mr. Lashmore at Hollingford it seems to have been inevitable so Lashmore had been defeated the Hollingford election interested dim church so little that he had never inquired as to its result and truth he had forgotten all about it I fear Mr. Lashmore is rather disappointing rumor says that the philosophical theory of life and government which he put before us as original was taken word for word from a French book which he took for granted no one would have read I hope this is not true it has a very unpleasant sound quite as unpleasant thought dim church was Mrs. Toplady zeal in spreading the rumor he found no difficulty in crediting it the biosociological theory had occupied his thoughts for a time and in reflecting upon it now he found it as plausible as any other but it had no more power to interest him Lashmore perhaps was mere solfice charlatan an unscrupulous journalist who talked instead of writing words words how sick he was of the universal babble the time had taken for its motto that council of Mephisto vor allem halted uke on orte and how many of these loud talkers believed the words they uttered or had found them in their own minds and how many preachers of socialism in this that or the other form had in truth the socialist spirit Lashmore with his emphasis on the obligation of social service was he not simply an ambitious struggle and intrigue careless of everything but his own advancement probably enough and on the whole was there ever an age so rank with individualism as this of ours which chatters the simplicity of self subdual to the common cause I too thus he thought am as much an individualist as the others if I said that I care to rap for mankind at large I should be phrase making only thank heaven I don't care to advertise myself I don't care to make money I ask only to be left alone and to satisfy and quiet my sense of self-respect on the moral he was gone end of chapter 28 chapter 29 of our friend the charlatan this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org our friend the charlatan by George Gissing chapter 29 when you receive this letter you will have already seen the result I knew how it would be but tried to hope because you were hoping my pole is better than that of the last liberal candidate but Haulingford remains a Tory stronghold shall I come to see you I am worn out utterly exhausted and can scarcely hold the pen perhaps a few days at the seaside would do me good but what right have I to idle if you would like me to come please wire to alver home rectory possibly you would rather I didn't bring my gloom now you have land with you and are enjoying yourself above all be quite frank if you are too disappointed to care to see me in heaven's name say so you needn't fear its effect upon me I should be glad to have done with the world but I have duties to discharge I wish you could have heard my last speech there were good things in it you shall see my address of thanks to those who voted for me I must try to get it widely circulated for as you know it has more than local importance break spear good fellow says that I have a great career before me I grin and can't tell them the squalid truth there are many things I should like to speak about my brain is feverishly active I must try to rest another 24 hours of this strain and the results would be serious in any case where to me yes or no if it is no I shall say so be it and begin it once to look out for it some day of earning bread and cheese we shall be friends all the same Mrs. Wollstone was at Eastbourne having read Lashmore's letter she brooded for a few minutes then but took herself to the post office and telegraphed come at once a few hours later she received a telegram informing her that Lashmore would reach Eastbourne at 11 o'clock on the next morning at that hour she waited in her lodgings on the seafront the cab drove up Lashmore was shown into the room he looked indeed much the worse for his agitations his hand was hot he moved languidly and seemed to be too tired to utter more than a few words are you alone quite then is down on the shore and won't be back till half past one would you mind if I lay down on the sofa of course not replied iris regarding him anxiously you're not ill I hope he took her hand and pressed it against his forehead with the most melancholy of smiles having dropped onto the couch he beckoned iris to take a chair beside him what can I get for you she asked you must have some refreshment sleep sleep he moaned musically if I could but sleep a little but I have so much to say don't fuss you know how I hate fuss no no I don't want anything I assure you but I haven't slept for a week give me your hand how glad I am to see you again so you still have faith in me you don't despise me but nonsense that iris allowing him to hold her hand against his breast as he lay motionless his eyes turn to the ceiling you must try again that's all that hollering for it it was evidently hopeless yes I made a mistake if I could have stood as a conservative I should have carried all before me it was Lady Ogrem's quarrel with Rob which committed me to the other side iris was silent panting a little as if she suppressed words which had risen to her lips he turned his head to look at her of course you understand that party names haven't the least meaning for me by necessity I wear a ticket but it's a matter of total indifference to me what name it bears my object has nothing to do with party politics but for Lady Ogrem's squabbles I should at this moment be member for holling for it but would it be possible ask iris with a flutter to call yourself a conservative next time I've been thinking about that he spoke absently his eyes still upwards it is pretty certain that the conservative side gives me more chance it enrages me to think how I should have triumphed at holling for it I could have roused the place to such enthusiasm as it never knew the great mistake of my life but what choice had I Lady Ogrem was fatal to me he groaned and let his eyelids droop it is possible that at the general election a liberal constituency may invite me in that case of course he broke off with a weary wave of the hand but what's the use of thinking about it I must look for work do you know I have thoughts of going to New Zealand oh that's nonsense try to realize my position he raised himself on his elbow after my life of the last few months will it be very enjoyable to become a subordinate to work for wages to sink into obscurity does it seem to you natural do you think I should be able to bear it he had begun to quiver with excitement as Iris kept silence he rose to a sitting position and continued more vehemently don't you understand that death would be preferable a thousand times imagine me me at the beck and call the paltry everyday people does it seem to you fitting that I should pay by such degradation for one or two trivial errors how shall I bear it I don't know but bear it I must I keep reminding myself that I am not a free man if once I could pay my debt oh don't talk about that exclaimed Iris on a note of distress what do I care about the money no but I care about my honor cried lash mar if I had won the election all would have been different my career would have begun do you know what I should have done in that case I should have come to you and have said I'm a member of parliament it is to you that I owe this more than to anyone else will you do yet more for me will you be my companion in the life upon which I'm entering share all my hopes help me to conquer that is what I meant to do but I'm beaten I can only ask you to have patience with your miserable debtor he let his face fall onto the head of the sofa and shook with emotion there was a short silence then Iris her cheeks flushing lightly touched his hair and once he looked up gazed into her face what you still believe in me enough for that yes replied Iris her eyes down and her bosom fluttering enough for that but be careful think he looked at her with impressive sadness your friends will tell you that you are marrying a panelist adventure have you the courage to face all that kind of thing I know you better than my friends do replied Iris taking both her own the hand he held to her my fear she added again dropping her eyes and fluttering is that you will someday repent never never it would be that blackest ingratitude he spoke so fervently that the freckled face became rosy with joy it was so near to his that the man and him claimed warmer tribute and Iris grew rosier still haven't you always loved me a little she whispered if I had only known it answered lash mark the victor's smile softened with self-reproach my ambition has much to answer for forgive me Iris there's something else I must say dear she murmured after all I have so little and there's Len you know why of course you imagine I should wish to rob him no no no she painted but it is such a small income after all I'm afraid we ought to to be careful at first of course we must we shall live as simply as possible and then you mustn't suppose that I shall never earn money it's only waiting for one's opportunity a silence fell between them lash marks amorous countenance had an undernote of thoughtfulness Iris smiling blissfully nonetheless reflected what are you thinking of he asked gently only how happy I am I haven't the slightest fear I know you have great things before you of course we must make use of our friends may I write to Mrs. Toplady and tell her she spoke without looking at him and so was spared the interpretation of muscular twitches certainly you know whether she is still in London I don't know but probably not don't you think she may be very useful to us I've always found her very nice and kind she knows such hosts of people lash mark had his own thoughts about Mrs. Toplady but the advantage of her friendship was undeniable happily he had put it out of her power to enter him by any revelation she might make concerning May Tomlin is about to Iris that May had been undisguisedly in love with him which suffices to explain anything she might hear about the tragic comedy at Rivernoke whether the Lady of Pond Street could be dependent upon for genuine goodwill was a question that must remain unsettled until he had seen her again she had been him to call upon her at all events and plainly it would be advisable to do so as soon as possible yes he answered reflectively she is a person to be reckoned with it's possible her advice might be worth something in the difficulty about liberal or conservative she is intelligent enough I think to understand me on that point yes you might write to her once if I were you I would speak quite frankly you know her well enough for that don't you frankly how well I mean that you might say we have really been fond of each other for a long time and that well that fate has brought us together in spite of everything that kind of thing you know yes yes exclaimed Iris that's just what I should like to say their talk grew calmly practical the last half hour of it was concerned with pecuniary detail her eye on the clock for Leonard were sure to enter very soon mrs. Wolstein gave up full account of her income enumerating the securities which were in the hands of her trustee mr. Rybolt and those which he had under her own control in the event of her remarriage mr. Rybolt's responsibility came to an end a circumstance very pleasing to lashmar when the school boy interrupted them their conversation was by no means finished after cheerful lunch they resumed it on the seashore Leonard being sent off to amuse himself as he would by tea time it had been agreed that lashmar should at once give up his expensive London rooms and come down to Eastbourne to recruit his health and enjoy Iris's society until Leonard went back to school the house at West Hamstead should be their home for the first 12 month by that time they would see how things were going and be able to make plans early in the evening lashmar took a train for town at his lodging he found several letters two of them were important constants brides handwriting indicated the envelope to be first torn open she wrote concisely and with her usual clearness the old news from howling forward had been a grief to her but it was very satisfactory to see that lashmar had reduced the conservative majority you've gained some very useful experience which I hope you may before long have an opportunity of using please send me a statement of the election expenses as soon as you can you remember the understanding between us in that matter I'm soon leaving England for a few weeks but a letter directed as above will always reach me the address referred to was that of a well-known society for social reform in the west of London his hand tremulous with the anger which this curt epistle had excited lashmar broke an envelope on the flap of which in red letters the pond street address so familiar to him Mrs. Toplady wrote more at length she took the trouble to express her disappointment at the result of the hauling forward election in courteously rounded terms our dear old friend of Rivenoch would have found some apt phrase to describe such a man as Butterworth wasn't she good at that kind of thing how I have left to hear her talk of the late lamented rob you have the satisfaction of knowing that you got more votes than any liberal has done at the hauling forward for many years so the papers tell me in fact you have made a very good start indeed and I'm sure the eye of the party will be on you lashmar glowed he had not expected such words from Mrs. Toplady after all Iris had given him good advice who knew but this moment might be more useful to him than Lady Ogrum had been do you care for news of Miss Tomlin the latter continued after spending two or three days with me she took rest this and took rooms for herself I'm afraid to tell you the truth that she is a little disappointing it is perhaps quite as well that a certain romantic affair which was confided to me came to nothing a week after she left my house I received a very stiff not to say impertinent letter in which the young lady informed me that she was about to marry a Mr. Yabsley of Northampton a man to quote her words of the highest powers and with a word to him this seemed to me I confess a little sudden but at least it had the merit of being amusing perhaps I may venture to hope that you are already quite consoled remember me I beg to miss bride are you likely to be in this part of the world during the holidays if anywhere near do come and see me and we will talk about that striking philosophical theory of yours lashmar it is lit all at once he saw Mrs. Toplady smile troubled him nonetheless did he ponder her letter re-reading it several times presently he mused with uneasiness on the fact that iris might even now be writing to Mrs. Toplady with her interest in him she seemed indeed to be genuinely interested survived the announcement that after all he was not going to marry Constance bride but had declined upon an insignificant little widow with a few hundreds a year was not this upshot of his adventures too had Mrs. Toplady been within easy reach he would have gone to see her but she wrote from the north of Scotland he could only await the result of iris his letter to the news concerning May Tomlin he gave scarcely a thought Mr. Yabsley of Northampton exceeding weariness sank him for a few hours in sleep but before dawn he was tossing again on the waves of miserable doubt why had he not waited a little before going to see iris if only he had received this letter of Mrs. Toplady in time he would have checked him or so he thought was it the malice of fate which had ordained that on his way to Eastbourne he should not have trouble to look in at his lodgings how many such wretched accidents he could recall was he instead of being Fortune's favorite simply a poor devil hunted by ill luck doomed to lose every chance why not he as well as another such men abound he had not yet taken the irretrievable step until he was actually married I hope remain to him he might postpone the fatal day his purse was not yet empty why should he be too strict in the report of his election expenses to Constance every pound in his pocket meant a prolongation of liberty a new horizon of the possible two days later he was back again at Eastbourne he had taken a cheap little lodging and yielded himself to seaside indolence a week passed then iris heard from Mrs. Toplady she did not at one show lash nor the letter she awaited a moment when he was law by physical comfort into a facile unsanguine humor Mrs. Toplady must have been in a hurry when she wrote this was her remark as with seeming carelessness she produced the letter of course she has an enormous correspondence I shall hear again from her no doubt before long one side only of the note paper was covered in formal phrase the writer said that she was glad to hear of her friends engagement and wished her all happiness not a word about their future meeting not an allusion to lash mars prospects if iris had announced her coming marriage with some poor clerk Mrs. Toplady could not have written less effusively there's an end of her interest in me dies remarked with a nervous shrug iris protested and did her best to put another aspect on the matter but without success for 24 hours lash mark kept away from her she offended tried to disregard his absence but at length sped to make inquiries fearful lest he should be driven to despair at the murky end of a wet evening they paced the esplanade together you don't love me said iris on a side it is because I love you he replied glooming that I can't bear to think of you married to such a luckless fellow as I am dearest she whispered am I ruining you do you wish to be free again tell me the truth I think I can bear it the next day saw them rambling in sunshine lash mark amorson resigned iris glitteringly hopeful and with such alternations did the holiday go by when lennon returned to school their marriage was fixed for ten days later shortly before leaving east born iris had written to mr. already they had corresponded on the subject of her marriage this last letter concerning a point of business which required immediate attention remained without reply followed by her trustee's silence iris soon after she reached home went to see him at his city office she learned that mr. was out of town but would certainly return in a day or two again she wrote again she waited in vain for a reply on a dull afternoon near the end of September as she sat thinking of lash mark and resolutely seeing him in the glorified aspect dear to her heart and mind the servant announced mr. Barker this was the athletic young man in whose company she had spent some time at gorlston before lash marks coming his business lay in the city he knew mr. ribald and through him had made mrs. wallstands acquaintance the face with which he entered the drawing room portended something more than a friendly chat iris had at one time thought that this young man thought disposed to offer her marriage was that his purpose now and did it account for his odd look began abruptly whether you know anything about rybalt have you heard from him lately iris replied that she herself wished to hear of that gentleman who did not answer her letters and was said to be out of town that so is it exclaimed the young man with a yet stranger look on his face you really have no idea where he is none whatever and I particularly want to see him so do I said mr. Barker smiling grimly so do several people you'll excuse me I understand I knew he was a friend of yours and thought you might perhaps know more about him than we did in the city I mustn't stay iris stared at him as he rose a vague alarm began to tremble in her mind you don't mean that anything's wrong she panted we'll hope not but it looks queer oh cried iris he has money of mine he is my trustee I know that please excuse me I really mustn't stay oh but tell me mr. is my money in danger I can't say but you certainly ought to look after it get someone to make inquiries at once that's my advice I really must go he disappeared leaving iris motionless in amazement and terror end of chapter 29 chapter 30 of our friend the charlatan this is a LibriVox recording all LibriVox recordings are in the public domain for more information or to volunteer please visit LibriVox.org our friend the charlatan by George Gissing chapter 30 the wedding was to be a very quiet one Lashmar would have preferred the civil ceremony at the table of the registrar with musty casuals for witnesses but iris shrank from this it must be at a church and with a few friends looking on or surely people would gossip had he been marrying an iris dice would have called for pomp and circumstance with portraits in the fashion papers in every form of advertisement which society has contrived as it was he desired to slink through the inevitable he was ashamed he was confounded and only did not declare it to the very eve of the wedding day his mind fared to delusive hopes had men and gods utterly forsaken him in solitude he groaned and gnashed his teeth and no deliverance came reaction made him at times the fervent lover and these interludes supported iris's courage let it once be over she kept saying to herself she trusted in her love and in her womanhood at all events cried the bridegroom and we didn't go through the foolery of running away to hide ourselves it's only waste of money but iris pleaded for the honeymoon people would think it so strange if they went straight from church to their home at west hamstead and would not a few autumn weeks of devin be delightful again he yielded the vicar of alvar home and his wife when satisfied that dice's betrothed was a respectable person consented to be present at the marriage not easily did mrs. lashmar digest her bitter disappointment which came so close upon that of dice's defeat at hollingford but she was a practical woman and in the state of things at alvar home six hundred a year seemed to hurt not altogether to be despised my fear was she remarked one day to her husband the dice would be tempted to marry money I respect him for the choice he has made it shows character the vicar just gave a glance of surprise but said nothing every day made him an older man in look and bearing his head was turning white he had begun to mutter to himself as he walked about the parish not a man in england who worried more about his own affairs and those of the world in an obscure lodging dice awaited the day of destiny in the evening he went to dine at west hamstead though he was rather late iris had not yet come home and she had left no message to explain her absence he waited a quarter of an hour when at length his betroth came hurrying into the room she wore so strange a countenance that dice could not but ask what had happened nothing she declared it was only that she had been obliged to hurry and she taught her to a chair death pale all but fainting what the devil is the matter with you cried lashmar who's over a strong nerves could not endure this kind of thing his violence had an excellent effect iris recovered herself and came towards him with hands extended it's nothing at all dearest I couldn't bear to keep you waiting and fretted myself into a fever when I saw what time it was don't be angry with me will you dice was satisfied it seemed to him a very natural explanation a caress put him into his gracious mood after all you know he said you're a very womanly woman I think we shall have to give up pretending that you're not but I've given it up long since iris exclaimed with large eyes didn't you know that I'm not sure he laughed that I'm not glad of it and they passed a much more tranquil evening than usual iris seemed tired she sat with her head on dice's shoulder thrilling when his lips touched her hair he had assured her that her hair was beautiful that he had always admired its hue of the autumn elm leaf her phase two he was beginning to find pretty and seldom did he trouble to reflect that she was seven years older than he already he regarded this house as his own his books had been transferred hither and many of his other possessions very carefully had iris put out of sight or got rid of everything which could remind him of her former marriage certain things portraits and the like which must be preserved for Leonard's sake were locked away in the boy's room of course lashmark had given her no presence she on the other hand had been very busy in furnishing a study which should please him buying the pictures and ornaments he liked and many offensive books of which he said that he had need into this room dice was not allowed to peep it waited as a surprise for him on the return from the honeymoon drawing room and dining room he trod as master and often felt that after all a man could be very comfortable here for a year or two a box of good cigars invited him after dinner a womanly woman the little mistress of the house and all could be sure that he wasn't glad of it one more day only before that of the wedding dice had been on the point of asking whether all the business with rival was satisfactorily settled but delicacy withheld him really there was nothing to do iris's money simply passed into her own hands on the event of her marriage it would be time enough to talk of such things presently they spent nearly all the last day iris was in the extremity of nervousness she looked as if she had not slept for two or three nights often she hit her face against dice's shoulder and shook as if sobbing but no tears followed do you love me she asked again and again do you really really love me but you know I do dice answered at length irritably how many times must I tell you it's all very well to be womanly but don't be womanish you're not sorry you're going to marry me you're getting hysterical and I can't stand that hysterical she became as soon as lashmore had left her one of the two servants looking into the dressing room before going to bed saw her lying half on the floor half against the sofa in a lamentable state she wailed in coherent phrases I can't help it too late I can't can't help it oh oh unobserved the domestic drew back and went to gossip with her fellow servant of this strange incident the hours drove on lashmore found himself at the church accompanied by his father his mother his old friend the home office clerk they waited the brides coming she was five minutes late ten minutes late but came at last with her were two ladies kinsfolk of hers had risen from a sick bed to go through the ceremony she could not have shown a more disconcerting visage but she held herself before the altar the book was opened the words of fate were uttered the golden circlet slipped on to her trembling hand and mrs. dice lashmore passed forth upon her husband's arm to the carriage that awaited them a week then by they were staying at dollish and lashmore who had quite come round to his wife's opinion on the subject of the honeymoon cared not how long these days of contented indolence lulled his ambitious soul at times he was even touched by the devotion which repaid his sacrifice a certain timidity which clung to iris a tremulous solicitude which marked her behavior to him became her he thought very well indeed constant's bride was right he could not have been thus at his ease with the woman capable of reading his thoughts and of criticizing them he talked at large of his prospects which took a hue from the house in sea and sky one morning they had strolled along the cliffs and in a sunny hollow they sat down to rest dice took from his pocket a newspaper he had bought on coming forth let us see what fools are doing he said genially iris watched him with an easy eye the sight of a newspaper was dreadful to her yet she always eagerly scanned those that came under her notice lying now on the dry turf she was able to read one page whilst dice occupied himself with another of a sudden she began to shake then a half stifle cry escaped her what is it asked her husband startled oh look dice look at this she pointed him to a paragraph headed disappearance of a city man when last martin read it he met his wife's anguished look with surprise and misgiving you've had a precious narrow escape of course this is nothing to you now oh but I'm afraid it is I'm afraid it is dice what do you mean didn't you get everything out of his hands I thought it was safe I left it till we were back at home last mart started to his feet pale as death what then all your money is lost oh surely not how can it be we must make inquiries at once inquiries inquiries enough have been made you may depend upon it before this got into the papers right read the fellow has bolted the police are after him is robbed and swindled right and left do you imagine your money has escaped his clutches they stood face to face dear don't be angry with me sounded from iris and up choking voice I am not to blame I couldn't help it oh don't look at me like that dear husband but you have been outrageously careless what right had you to expose us to this danger as that I was as as that I was I wanted to speak of it and my cursed delicacy prevented me what right had you to behave so idiotically he said off at a great speed towards doll lish iris ran after him caught his arm clung to him where are you going you won't leave me I'm going to London of course was his only reply as he strode on running by his side iris told with broken breath of the offer of marriage she received from Rybolt not long ago she understood now why he wished to marry her no doubt he already found himself in grave difficulties and saw this as a chance either of obtaining money or of concealing a fraud he had already practiced at her expense why didn't you tell me that before cried lash more savagely what right had you to keep it from me I ought to have told you oh do forgive me don't walk so quickly dice I haven't the strength to keep up with you you know that he hadn't everything most fortunately not everything with an exclamation of wrath will at length the man pursued his way iris fell back she taught her she sank to her knee upon the grass moaning sobbing only when he was 50 yards ahead did dice pause and look back already she was running after him again he turned and walked less quickly at length there was a touch upon his arm dear dear don't you love me panted a scarce audible voice don't be a greater idiot than you have been already was his fierce reply I have to get to London and look about just now in less than an hour they had taken train by early evening they reached Paddington station whence they set forth to call upon the person whom iris mentioned as most likely to be able to inform them concerning Rybolt it was the athletic Mr. Barker who dwelt with his parents at Highgate an interview with this gentleman who was caught at dinner put an end to the faint hope slash mark had tried to entertain Rybolt said Barker was not a very professional the frauds he had perpetrated were not great enough to make his case sensational but there could be no shadow of doubt that he had turned his trusty ship to the best account he is nothing but his skin to pay with out of the young city man and I wouldn't give much for that don't distress yourself Mrs. Lashmore I know a lady who is let in worse than you considerably worse the newly married couple made their way to West Hamstead the servant of the house did not conceal her surprise as she admitted them it was nearly ten o'clock in the evening I suppose we must have something to eat said dice sullenly you must be very hungry iris answered regarding him like a frightened but affectionate dog that eyes its master Jane shall get something at once they sat down to such a supper as could be prepared at a moment's notice by good fortune a bottle of claret had been found and accepting one glass which is why thankfully Ma drank it all at an ordinary time this excess would have laid him prostrate in the present state of his nerves it did him nothing but good a healthier he mantled on his cheeks and he began to look furtively at iris with eyes which had lost their evil expression she so exhausted that she could scare support herself on the chair timidly met these glances but as yet no word was spoken why haven't you eaten anything asked dice at length breaking the glass which was almost natural I have dear yes a bit of bread come eat you'll be ill if you don't she tried to obey tears began to trickle down her face what's the use of going on like that lashmar exclaimed pretulently rather than in anger you're tired to death if you really can't eat anything better go to bed we shall see how things look in the morning iris rose and came towards him thank you dear speaking so kindly I don't deserve it oh we won't say anything about that he replied with an air of generosity then laughing aren't you going to show me the study dice I haven't the heart she began to weep in earnest nonsense let us go and look at it I'll carry the lamp they left the room and iris struggling with her tears led the way to the study door as he entered dice gave an exclamation of pleasure the little room was furnished and adorned the way tastefully hooked shelves with all lashmar's own books carefully arranged and many new volumes added made a pleasant show a handsome writing table and chair seemed to invite to pen work I could have done something here dice remarked with a nodding of the head iris came nearer timidly she laid a hand upon his shoulder appealingly she gazed into his face dear it was a just audible whisper you are so clever you are so far above ordinary men lashmar smiled his arm felt lightly about her waist we have still nearly 200 pounds a year the whisper continued there's land but I must take him from school poo we'll talk about that a cry of gratitude escaped her dice how good you are I'll bravely you hear it my own dear husband I'll do anything anything we needn't have a servant I'll work I don't care anything you still love me say you still love me he kissed her hair it's certain I don't hate you well we'll see how things look tomorrow who knows it may be the real beginning of my career end of chapter 30 end of our friend the charlatan by George gissing