 why narcissists keep you hanging on they discard you they tell you they don't want you they tell you you're a bad person but then they still keep checking up on you they still keep you hanging on because you're there for them you're available but they don't really need you they're trying to move on with their new supply but sometimes their new supply is busy and they don't want to trouble or annoy them with persistent requests or interruptions because they want to maintain their good image of living in a good and sensible way of having everything under control so they will come back just to use you because they know you want things to get better they know you want them to change so they know you're going to be there for them they know you're going to be willing to help them because they just got rid of you you're in a state of confusion you're wanting answers so they will try to get something out of you they will act like they're in need of something they will try to get money from you and then they will spend it on their new supply which is why you shouldn't engage with someone after they've made it clear that they don't want to be with you because they're only going to use you that's the only reason why they're keeping you around and it may not always be about money sometimes they're just feeling down and they need you to make them feel better either way it's still all about them and they expect you to be there for them which is why if they have an argument they will come back to you but if you do help them you're just making them better so that they can be in a better position for their new supply you're just helping to strengthen their relationship you're making it easier for them to move on and that's the only reason why they would keep you around there's no other reason for them to do that because they've already gotten rid of you they've already found someone else if you're such a bad person why would they want anything to do with you but it leaves you feeling hopeful it makes you think that maybe they actually care maybe things could get better so you act in accordance with their wishes and commands you do whatever they want you to do in the hopes that you will get back together because you assume that maybe they just needed some time away from you to realize how important you are to them because you're trying to justify what they're doing you're trying to make sense of it because you don't want to accept the truth and they're making you think that it's possible for you to get back together so that you continue to cooperate with them so that you're still there if they need you but they're already invested in someone else they've been spending their time with them and then they come in back to you to seek your support and approval because they know you still care about them they know you're still emotionally invested in them but when you do that you're just supporting their new relationship so don't let them come back don't let them use you because they've already discarded you they've already chosen to leave which shows that they don't care about you anymore because they're already involved with someone else but because you're hopeful you entertain it while they're playing you they're only keeping you around so that it's easier for them to move on to their new relationship you're just helping them to leave you because you're still giving them everything they need and they're just going to use you up until they're ready to get rid of you completely until they're ready to move forward with a new supply because despite everything you're doing for them eventually they're going to have no use for you and then it's going to hit you like a ton of bricks because up until that point you remained hopeful you expected things to change thank you for watching I hope this video resonates with you please like comment share and subscribe if you would like to donate my PayPal link is in the video description coaching inquiries you can email me at coaching at NARC survivor.co.uk thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon