 Hey, Psych2Goers, welcome back to the channel. It's only with your support that we can achieve our mission of making mental health more accessible to everyone. And we want to thank you for that. Now, let's continue. Are you burdened with thoughts that tell you that you're unlovable? Do you have a sinking feeling in your stomach when you're alone and your negative thoughts get loud and intrusive? Or are they more like whispers that you just can't shake as they follow you around wherever you go like an ever-present shadow? We made this video to remind you that you are lovable and that sometimes negative thoughts have the power to overtake us and distort our realities. They can make you believe awful things about yourself. To help you overcome these thoughts, here are six things to remember when you feel unlovable. Number one, love blossoms when you start loving yourself. Do you struggle with self-love? Part of the reason you may feel unlovable at times is that you might have forgotten to prioritize loving yourself. Self-love isn't always easy, but it is foundational for believing in yourself, having confidence in your dreams, and accepting your own lovability. You are lovable just as you are, but in order for you to feel that, you have to start celebrating yourself. To practice self-love, try writing down things you love about yourself, moments in your day that made you proud, and people in your life who love you. Number two, your brain is hardwired to latch on to negativity. Have you ever heard the phenomenon called negative bias? It describes the idea that our brain processes negative events differently than positive ones, and causes us to amplify them. This can make you focus too much on the negativity around you. You might be recalling negative moments and events and feel unlovable because of that. Remember that your brain is hardwired to focus on those negative things and emotions. Positivity also surrounds you, and the more you bring it to the surface, the easier it will be to accept these negative events and begin to process them in a healthy way. Number three, your flaws do not define you and who you are. We are all only human. As humans, we make mistakes. You might be stuck thinking that your flaws are definitions of your character, or that they're unblast for everyone to see and pick apart. But in reality, your flaws allow you a chance to learn and grow into the best version of yourself. When you feel like your flaws are making you unlovable, remember that everyone has flaws and that your flaws make you unique and different. We can all learn from our mistakes or our shortcomings, and we all need time to stretch and grow. You are lovable just as you are, flaws and all. Number four, your mind is a great storyteller. When someone doesn't respond to you right away, do you assume that they don't like you? If so, you're not alone. It turns out that your brain tends to fill in gaps by making up stories that put you in a negative light. You wind up assuming that people are mad at you or that they don't like you. Then you'll begin to believe and react to those same assumptions in your mind. The truth is, these stories your brain tells you can mask reality and your worth. And when you believe these stories, it can lead to a downward emotional spiral, making you feel unlovable or faulty. If this happens to you, remember that your brain naturally weaves together elaborate tales. Number five, romantic relationships do not determine your worth or your value. When you've been single for a while, do you start questioning your lovability? Though it's tempting, don't fall into society's trap. There is no written rule that says single is a reflection of your lovability or even a negative thing at all. We create negative associations with being single in our minds because society has conditioned us to believe that we're incomplete without a romantic partner. In fact, there are many benefits to being single. If you've been single for a while, you may be feeling flawed, unworthy or unlovable. In those moments, remember that your worth is not determined by your relationship status. You are lovable and worthy just for being you following your passions, regardless of whether or not you have a significant other. And number six, the way people treat you is not a reflection of you. Has anyone ever treated you badly and made you feel like it was your fault? Perhaps it was a family member or a romantic partner. If this is the case, please know that any mistreatment towards you is never your fault. If someone's rude to you, yells at you or treats you badly in any way, it's natural for your brain to convince yourself that you deserve it as a coping mechanism to make sense of what happened. But remember that nobody, for any reason, is entitled to treat you badly. The trauma that you've experienced is never your fault and absolutely does not mean that you are not lovable, no matter what your brain tries to tell you. We just wanted to remind you that you're wonderful and worthy just the way you are. Did you find this video helpful? Tell us in the comments below. Like and share this video if you think it could help someone else too. The studies and references used are listed in the description below. Don't forget to hit the subscribe button and the notification bell icon for more Psych2Go videos. Thanks so much for watching and we'll see you next time.