 Hello and welcome to MIPTV and with me as always is Bob Cook from the Manchester Institute for Psychotherapy and we're on to book review 20 Bob, it's terribly exciting isn't it? Yes, thanks. It seems a long time ago but in other ways it's gone quite quickly and it just shows how many TA books, because they're all TA books, have actually got on my bookshelf and this number 20th is probably the most seminal book of all. It is isn't it? And I mean people will gather by looking at the title what the book is but some of the interesting facts around it is that it's a book that gained popularity yes in the psychotherapeutic community, but it became a very mainstream read for people outside the world of counselling the psychotherapy. Yeah, that's right. And the book's called I'm Okay You're Okay by Tom Harris in 1972. He was a disciple of the original author of transaction analysis which was of course Eric Byrne who wrote the first book in 1961. And this sort of popular book came along 11 years later and a very accessible paperback with a wonderful title I think I'm Okay You're Okay, very positive and one of the most healthy of existential life positions but I think what really set it apart was the accessibility of the language which really meant people could understand that model very easily. Yes and when I read it, and I read it a long time before I was involved in the world of counselling psychotherapy it made so much sense, but it does really link it to Byrne's idea of making therapy accessible to the common person using plain language and not kind of pseudo scientific terms. So it is in that tradition a Byrne's philosophy really isn't it? Absolutely and his idea of existential life positions I'm Okay You're Okay being the most healthy one of course that we should aim for is not only a wonderful idea but of course a very enlightening and powering idea. Yeah it is, it's a very hopeful humanistic position and I know in the preamble before we hit the record button you were saying that it's a very humanistic view of the human condition. Which may surprise some people being it's linked to a psychoanalytical perspective. In a way but you know if we think of Carl Rogers and I know you know a lot more about him probably than me being you know teaching person-centered therapy and theory but of course his whole position around self-actualization meeting the core conditions is very in the sort of world of I'm Okay You're Okay. Absolutely it is it's definitely on the same page. I'd agree with you there Bob. I always thought I had a tutor actually gave a copy of a book to a client and I thought yeah one of my tutors when I was being taught mentioned she'd given a copy to a client. So I always thought there was a big self-help kind of component to this book where people could read it and to some extent start to kickstart their own process. Yeah and it goes through the basic theories of transaction analysis Eager State, Games, Rackets and Script in a very practical way and it's also been a philosophical touch to transaction analysis. As I said visiting the existential positions the most healthy I'm okay you're okay then you've got I'm okay you're not okay which is more of the paranoid position then I'm not okay you're okay which is more of the withdrawn position and then of course the most futile position of all which is I'm not okay you're not okay and we visit all those positions I think generally very you know very very much through the week or through the day or how we structure time but the most healthy position of course to aim for is I'm okay you're okay which is the title of that book. Absolutely and I always thought it was a super way of teaching on a very basic level attachment theory I'm okay you're okay is a healthy attachment I'm okay you're not okay is avoiding dismissive you're okay I'm not okay is ambivalent and of course I'm not okay you're not okay is disorganized attachment the work of Maynes and Solomon and it's a really I thought it was a really straightforward way of on a very basic level teaching what attachment styles are and as a way of personal self-awareness and also teaching it with with others very useful teaching aid I would imagine Bob. Very much so and it's a very again I'm going on about this point but I think it is the hallmark of this book it's very accessible and you can give this book to clients very easy to read in a paperback very short which isn't long it's only about a hundred pages I think and it goes through the parent adult child model very succinctly very simply and has a first philosophical easy accessible template so you know teachers used it business people used it and it was within the best seller of the hundred best sellers in America for years and years and years and that fact if you looked it up now I think this book would still be very high in the most popular books sold in the world wide in fact and I would also support be I would bet this that if you talk to most transactionalists or people are interested in the world of psychotherapy per se depending even depending on what model they came from they have either read this book or it's on the bookshelf absolutely it's on my bookshelf behind me I've got I've got a very very early yellow copy of it very which I think about I bought for 50p a bing and bye but there you go it's such an available book it's affordable as well so fantastic as always you know Bob is not being sponsored by Thomas Harris if he's still alive or the book company this is Bob just sharing his love of literature and as always we'll put a link to the book where you can buy it from a book seller in the link below and at the end of the video we'll put a little picture up just to remind everybody what the format of the book is like so I'm okay you're okay Thomas Harris what a fantastic book to have for the 20th broadcast and there's always Bob Cook thank you very much you're welcome thank you